I'm Gay

By Chip Dyp

Published on Aug 26, 1999

Gay

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The following program contains material suited for a mature audience. If you are not over 18 you should be leaving now. Of course I can't control you and neither can anyone else really. This story is entirely false except for the true parts. And now for our feature presentation. Viewer Discretion is advised...

I'm Gay by: Chip Dyp (chipdyp@hotmail.com)

"Does it hurt?"

"A little," I said as I fought to control my voice. It didn't hurt a little - it hurt a lot. I wasn't about to complain though. Devin hadn't complained earlier.

I lay on my back looking at the ceiling of my parent's trailer, my ankles on Devin's shoulders. This wasn't what I was expecting. I was expecting symphonies, and more pleasure than I could handle.

Devin leaned forward and brushed the hair out of my face, so he could look me in the eyes. "I need you to tell me if this is hurting really badly, all right? I love you, Chad, and I don't want to hurt you. Does it hurt?"

I nodded my head. The pain left as Devin pulled out. He wrapped his arms around me and held onto me tightly. "I want you to promise me that if it hurts you'll tell me."

"I'm sorry. I thought I could handle it."

"Hey, hey, hey. No apologies," Devin said as he stroked my cheek, "We've waited over a year to have sex, there's no big hurry."

"Yeah, but you didn't say anything."

"I didn't say anything because it didn't hurt too bad. You spent a lot of time loosening me up, remember?"

"Yeah, but so did you."

"I know, but it wasn't enough. If you want to try a little later, I'll spend a little more time stretching you out."

"I'd like to try now, if you want to."

"Only if you want to."

"I do," I said as I rested my hand on Devin's heart. I could feel it beating slowly under my hand. Devin and I had been going out for over a year, ever since he had broken down and told me he was gay. He had been so scared that I'd reject him. I could never reject him though. I had loved him for more than three years now and he had been my best friend for almost ten years before that.

Of course, admitting to each other that we were gay hadn't improved our sex lives. Devin had to share a room with his older brother, I had to share with my younger brother. Neither of us had any real privacy. We had to be content with stolen kisses, and casual gropes whenever we could sneak them in.

This weekend was supposed to be different though. I had managed to prove to my parents that I was responsible enough to be trusted with the trailer. Devin and I had planned this weekend for almost a month. Our first chance to be intimate - our first chance to have sex.

Devin kissed me on the forehead and then rolled over so he was kneeling beside me on the bed. "Lift your legs up beautiful. I want to make sure I do this right."

I lifted my legs off the bed and watched as Devin moved into position. I felt his finger as it grazed the sensitive skin between my balls and my hole. I shivered and smiled at Devin.

"Liked that, did you?" Devin asked as he gently rubbed that piece of skin again, "I'll have to remember that."

I watched Devin open the tube of KY jelly that we had bought at the drug store before leaving the city. I knew what was coming as he got ready to rub a fingerful of the cool gel on my almost virgin hole. I closed my eyes tight, and tensed up. When I didn't feel anything I opened my eyes and relaxed for a second. It was that moment when Devin chose to push his slick finger up my tight chute.

"You've got to relax, Chad," Devin said softly as he wiggled his finger around inside me, "Try to think about something else."

"Like what?"

"Like telling your parents that you are gay."

"Right, if you think that telling our parents is such a good idea, why don't you tell yours?"

"I'm going to when I get home. I love you, Chad, and I don't want to hide that from my parents anymore."

"Are you serious?" I asked, totally forgetting about what Devin was doing until he hit my prostate. I closed my eyes and my mouth opened as I realized why anal sex was so desirable.

"Very serious," Devin replied as he continued rubbing my prostate, "I told Sean about us before we left."

My eyes snapped open and I stared up at Devin. "You told your older brother about us? Why? Oh God, what if he tells my parents. How could you do this to me?"

"I did it because I wanted to be able to tell someone that I love you."

"That's not a good enough reason," I said as I sat up on the bed, "Why didn't you ask me first?"

"Because you'd say no."

"So you did it anyway."

"I needed to talk to someone, anyone, about being gay. I am tired of hiding my true self from my parents, from my family. I finally told Sean because I thought he could handle it best. You know Sean. He wouldn't do anything to hurt us. He's lied to both our parents when we were kids to keep us from getting into too much trouble," Devin stood up and walked over to the small couch facing the bed, "I was hoping I could make you understand why I did what I did."

"Devin, you didn't just out yourself, you outed me to your brother as well. What's next, you going to get the principal to make an announcement to the whole school? Did you ever think that I might not be ready to stand up to people over my sexuality?"

"I thought..."

"No," I shouted as I stood up, "You didn't think and that's the problem. You thought that what's good for you, has to be good for me."

"I'm sorry, Chad," Devin said as he moved to caress my face. I turned my back to him and struggled to hold back my tears. I could feel Devin's presence behind me as he stood there for what seemed like days before he softly whispered, "Look, I'm just going to go."

I turned around in time to see Devin's eyes cloud up as he moved away from me. I heard a small sob escape from him as he retreated to the other side of the small trailer. He started pulling on his pants and a t-shirt while I sat down on the bed, not knowing what to say. What finally managed to escape my lips sounded more like a croak than intelligible human speech. "Where are you going to go? We are three hours from home."

"I'll just hitch a ride home," Devin said as he struggled to pull on his socks.

I stood up and walked across the trailer to where Devin was sitting. I kneeled down on the floor before him so I could look him in the eyes. "Don't go."

"I have to," Devin said as he let his hands fall into his lap, "I've fucked things up between us. You're right, I didn't think things through. I could've just told Sean about me, but I told him about us. You mean so much to me, Chad. I knew that losing my brother was a possibility when I told him, I didn't think I'd lose you."

"But you did it anyway," I said softly as I leaned back on my feet.

"Yeah, I knew deep down that if I didn't tell him, I'd burst. I needed someone to tell, someone to talk to. It was the right thing to do, but I did it wrong. I shouldn't have told him about you."

I sat on my feet and looked deep into Devin's eyes. Devin had made a tough choice. He was willing to suffer the consequences. Deep down, I knew he was right. We would eventually have to tell our parents, I just didn't know if I was ready for that moment.

"How did Sean take it?"

"He took it really well. He gave me a big hug, and told me that he was proud of me. He wanted to talk to you too, but I told him that it could wait until after this weekend," Devin said as his fingers twitched minutely. He paused for a few seconds then placed his head into his hand and whispered, "But I guess that won't happen, now. I'm sorry, Chad."

I looked down at the floor of the trailer and thought about all the times I had spent with Devin. He was not only my boyfriend and lover, but my best friend as well. I was still mad at him for telling his brother about me and him, but he was right. I had two options, and it didn't take me long to make my choice. I looked back into Devin's eyes and smiled at him. "When we get back to town, I want you to come with me when I tell my parents that I'm gay."

"Are you serious?" Devin asked as he wiped his eyes.

"Very serious. But, right now, I want you come back to bed with me. I think I'm as ready as I'm ever going to be."

"But..."

"But what?" I asked as I placed my hand on the side of his face.

"Are you still mad at me?"

"Yes, a little, but nothing has changed between us. Well, the way I feel about you hasn't changed," I kissed Devin's hand, and then looked up at him with puppy dog eyes. "Don't you still love me?"

"Definitely," Devin said as he took my hands and helped me up. He wrapped me in a big hug and sniffled before he took my hand once again. "Come on, I still owe you something."

"Yes you do." I walked over to the bed and lay down on the covers. I watched as Devin pulled off his clothes. He was so beautiful. I smiled as he walked over to the bed and gave me a kiss.

"Let's try something different," Devin said as he began kissing and nipping my chest.

"All right, what did you want to try?"

"I'll lie down and you just lower yourself onto my cock. That way, you'll control the pace."

"'Kay."

I sat up and let Devin lie back on the bed. His cock wasn't quite fully erect, but it didn't take me long to fix that small problem. I squirted a big gob of the cool lubricant into my hand and rubbed it into Devin's organ. I grinned as a little squirt of precum oozed out the tip. I knew he was ready. I squatted over his chest and felt around behind me for his cock. I placed it against my hole and tried to relax. I felt the head of the cock force open the muscle, but this time there was only a little pain. Taking a deep breath I lowered myself a little more and accepted more of Devin's hot cock.

"Are you all right?" Devin asked as he moved to support me with his hands.

"I'm fine," I said through gritted teeth. I took a deep breath and sat down, taking all of Devin's cock in one quick stroke.

The minute Devin was completely buried in me, I wanted to stand up and scream. Devin sat up quickly and held onto me tightly. "Now that wasn't very smart. You could've hurt yourself."

"I had to do it. I don't think I'm ready for anything else right now. Can you just hold me?"

Devin nodded his head and kissed me. We kissed passionately while we waited for me to relax. After what seemed like hours, I felt like I could continue. Devin held onto me tightly and with my help, we rolled so I was on the bottom again. He looked into my eyes and gently pulled his still stiff cock out of me and then thrust his hips. I felt the tip of his cock as it caromed off my prostate. I was in heaven. I moaned and arched my back, trying to rub my prostate against his cock.

Devin continued thrusting, gently at first, but as he neared his climax he started pounding it into me with wild abandon. I groaned and started stroking my cock, trying to cum with my love. Devin let out a loud groan and thrust deeply into me. He stopped moving and lied down on top of me. One final stroke of my hand caused my cock to spasm and give up its load. I gasped and lay back on the old cushions that made up the bed.

Devin rubbed his knuckles against the side of my face and placed his head on my chest. "That was beautiful."

"Yeah," I said as I took a deep breath, "I want to do that again."

"I don't think I can do it again, at least not for a bit anyway."

I smiled and mussed up Devin's hair. "I meant when we get home."

"It would be nice to be able to do it at home."

Devin smiled at me and yawned. "I don't know about you, but I'm kinda sleepy."

"So am I."

"Lift your legs, and I'll clean you up before we go to sleep."

"'Kay."

I lifted my legs and Devin wiped the excess lube and cum away. He tossed the towel to the floor and lay down behind me. He draped his arm over me and kissed the top of my head.

"I love you, Chad."

"I love you, Devin."

I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

When I woke up the next morning, I realized that I was in bed with the man I loved. I rolled in his arms and kissed him on the nose. Devin's eyes fluttered open and when he saw me, he smiled. I leaned in and kissed him once more.

"Come on beautiful. We need to have a shower and then get ready to head back," Devin said as he rubbed my back.

"Do we have to?"

"Uh huh."

I crawled out of the bed and offered my hand to Devin. He rolled out of bed and then stood in front of me. "You are really beautiful."

"So are you."

We both dressed and grabbed our shaving kits. We walked the 300 feet to the public showers and were pleasantly surprised when we found they were empty. I wanted to crawl into the shower with him, but discretion won out over our hormones and we took solo showers. When we finished cleaning up, we walked back to the trailer and cleaned up our site. We hadn't done a lot, except set up the trailer, but I wanted to be sure that we left things as they were.

It didn't take us long to hook up the trailer, and then we were on our way back into town. Devin sat as close to me as possible, his hand on my thigh. The three hours passed quickly, and almost without warning we were home. I backed the trailer into the driveway with Devin's help, and then shut off the car. I unhitched the trailer and then parked the car on the street in front of the house. I sat in the driver's seat as I composed myself. It was time. I opened the door and walked over to where Devin was waiting for me on the driveway. He smiled at me and we walked into the house together.

"Mom? Dad? We're home."

"We're in the family room, Chad," I heard my Dad call out.

We walked through the house to the family room. My mom and dad sitting on the couch watching TV. I paused for a second, trying to think of the best way to break the news to them. I decided the direct approach was best. "Mom, dad, I have something to tell you."

"What is it, Chad?" My mom asked as she and dad looked over at Devin and I.

I took Devin's hand into my own and looked at him for support. He smiled at me and I looked back at my parents. "I'm gay."

June 1999 2859

My web site is located at http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Atrium/2898.

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