Straight? Or Gay? Trying to figure it out...

By Kolton

Published on Apr 25, 2021

Gay

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So let's get to know one another, hi my name is Kolton I'm 29, a veteran of the United States Navy, and I am just your typical straight white male! I love to do anything sports related, love to do wood working/carpentry, and spending time with my family. Oh I guess there is one more thing, I'm gay! I am the straightest gay man you'll ever meet and to make it even less stereotypical I'm a bottom! (TMI I KNOW) anyway.... I've never really fit in anywhere in the gay community at least what is around me. So I never really dated another guy before. But that all changed when I met the man of my dreams! There was just one problem, I met him on Craigslist and his post was, "Couple looking for third to have some fun!" So 4 and a half years went by where we would all hang out here and there and then the day finally happened!! They broke up! (I know I shouldn't be happy for this but sue me it made me the happiest I've ever been!) he texted "Hey I could really use a friend right now we broke up." When I read this let me tell you something! I got up and got in my car and I raced over to where he lives (hour and a half away) and was there in 55mins! We started hanging out more and more and then about a month into us talking he asked me if I wanted to start dating! The first thing that came to my mind was "Hell YES" but then I sat there and I thought about everything that I had been through and how for the last 8 months of my life before he texted me that day, I would sit at my place alone in the living room every day all day didn't talk to anyone barely ate and never really went outside unless it was to throw away the trash. I was at the lowest point of my life because everything and I mean everything felt like was against me! I shut off my emotions with drugs because of how much I had been hurt in the past! I quite literally had zero emotions I didn't care about anything or anyone! So was I going to put all this baggage I had on this person that I truly loved with all my heart and had been waiting for him since the moment we met each other? I sat there I'm sure with a stupid look on my face for what seemed like milliseconds to me, but I guess I was like that for over 30 seconds because he said "hey Kolton did you hear me? Why are you just staring at me like that?" I came to and said Matt you don't know how long I've been waiting for you to ask me that question! But before I answer you you need to know some things and then if you want to ask me after that then I'll give you my answer...... he sat there looking confused and sad that I just didn't say yes right away. I proceeded to tell him that I have a lot of baggage and went into a little bit of detail and he stopped me mind sentence and said "I don't care about any of that! I want you, and what ever you are dealing with we will deal with it together!" (Quite literally the most amazing and perfect thing anyone has ever said to me! It felt like it was out of a movie haha) and I was already tearing up while I was talking and after he said that he pulled me in and gave me a kiss and hugged me and whispered in my ear, "everything will work out as long as we are together!" My stomach dropped this is what I have been waiting for my whole life! For a person to show me the same amount of emotion that I put in! He had me head over heals for him!

But if you want to know more let me know!

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