Angsty Alexander

By Sam Bam

Published on Feb 26, 2015

Gay

Angsty Alexander part 4

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Jay

My romance with Felix had been a whirlwind but the honeymoon was over, my blinkers were off and I'd no idea why we were together. He was going home at the weekend but I knew I had to end it now, a weekend of thinking wouldn't make a difference.

The joke Jay made cemented it. Felix did feel like my keeper, he rarely left my side, but rarely showed much affection, and he was such a bitch.

I slept on it, then Thursday night I dug deep and headed to his room, Jamie answered and said he'd give us privacy, I hugged him and said it wouldn't take long.

"Felix, I don't need the weekend to think. It's over."

"Oh puleeze like I even want your snivelling cock any more, I've found a real man who wants me"

I walked out, that was easier than expected, I wasn't even hurt, I didn't care if it was true or not. I was single again.

On Friday I was excited. I put microwave popcorn in my bag when I headed to class, I was going to head to the suite straight after film which was my final class on a Friday.

It felt so good to not worry about who I was talking to or worry if Felix was feeling included. I realised what a boring chore he had been, we hadn't even been compatible in bed. What a wasted month.

I was chatting with Blondie and Peter. Blondie and I had made up shortly after that day, we had a few classes together and he'd straight away apologised for his part in things and told me he'd be giving me space by avoiding our group, well I missed him and when he introduced me to Brian I told them both they should hang out more. Felix had tried being nasty to Blondie but I asked him to be civil and he mostly ignored him.

I chucked the popcorn at Aaron who had several bowls of the stuff ready popped. Alexander arrived he poured vodka into the punch, dropped his bag and sat on the floor, leaning against my legs. I reached forward to squeeze his shoulder and he reached up to squeeze my hand.

I'd really missed him. I don't really know if we'll ever be back to being close but I was really happy that it looked like we'd be at least friends soon.

I sat back and enjoyed the first film, when it ended we chatted about it over punch and as Aaron was putting the second film on Alexander came and stood behind the couch, he leaned in between me and Peter.

"I have a paper to finish, I'll be back for the next one."

He kissed us both on the cheek in turn and left.

About an hour into the film Peter tensed up, it was a big emotional scene with the child and it kept showing close ups of the kid crying.

Holy fuck it's Alexander.

I looked at Peter, he was gawking too, I know he saw it. I looked round, Eric and Aaron, and Blondie and Brian were all paying more attention to each other than the movie and the others from film class didn't really know Alexander.

I gripped Peter's hand for the rest of the movie.

In the break we went to his room to talk. Peter grabbed his tablet.

"We know it was Sandy Green in the movie, tonnes of credits until he was 14. Then nothing for 4 years until this summer Zombie Darklands as Sasha Jade. He worked in Bucharest this summer right?"

I nodded

"That's listed as the location for the zombie film"

Something niggled at me.

"It's all the same name. Sandy Green, Sasha Jade, Alexander Emerald. Sandy, Sasha both short for Alexander"

I flashed back to Alexander blowing up at me about his name.

We flicked through the pictures marvelling at how he'd changed, there was nothing post puberty and in the zombie film set pictures no one was recognizable.

"Holy fuck" said Peter "why keep it secret?"

"For a normal life? Because it reminds him of his Mom? I think we should keep it quiet, at least until we talk to him."

"For sure, its not our secret to tell."

We went back out to watch the last movie, Alexander slipped back in and sat down in the dark. No wonder he'd slipped out when he saw what we were watching.

So many things were slotting in to place, his dislike of questions about his family and life before college, how he could talk to anyone despite being so closed off, why he was gifted top of the range vodka and didn't worry about money on that shopping trip. It explained him avoiding pictures and not joining any clubs. Maybe even his laundry habit.

I felt a little unhappy that he hadn't trusted me enough to tell me sooner. I wondered if he had planned to or what had stopped him. Mostly I felt fiercely protective of him and my heart was filling back up with love.

I remembered when his Mom was killed, we must have been 11 or 12 and he and his Dad were hounded everywhere. I remembered a photographer knocking food out his hand to try and make him cry. My Mom cried watching E! Then got so angry she switched it off and complained to the cable company and she boycotted the trashy magazines she loved for months afterward.

As the credits rolled Alexander got up to leave, I grabbed my bag and coat and followed him, Peter close behind.

"I'm rumbled?"

We nodded.

"Just you 2?"

We nodded again.

"Okay, can we talk back in our room?"

We hurried to the dorm, it was freezing.

"Okay I know you Jay, you've a hundred questions"

I smiled, "I think Peter has a few, million, too"

"First up please will you both keep it secret?"

"Yes" said Peter "Yes, but why?" I asked.

Alexander exhaled, we were all sat on my bed but he began pacing the floor.

"I just want to be me, Alexander, I don't want to be known as the cute kid actor or the kid with the murdered Mom or even Sandy Green all grown up. I want to be taken seriously in class, I want to be in study groups with people who think I'm smart, not because I was in movies, I want to be able to get drunk or have sex without worrying someone will sell pictures. I want to be out, to hold hands with my boyfriend without it needing a press conference, I want to eat pizza, to workout, to take a smelly shit without someone tweeting it."

He paused.

"I don't want to do a poor rich kid routine, I don't regret my career, but other than the film this summer it wasn't my choice. Since I stopped working I regained some privacy. Going to school for the first time at 14 gave me a more normal life and I'm desperate to keep it. Go on fire off the questions."

Peter drew us all into a hug.

"Don't worry we won't tell. Anyway you don't need another way to get guys, I'd never get a lookin if the guys at the gym knew you were in the movies, you've already the bigger cock"

"Why on earth are you in this shitty old dorm and not a nice one like Peter? You can afford it."

"I thought it would be easier to meet people on a corridor rather than in a suite, and if my roommate was a bigot it would be easier to swap than worrying if 5 or 6 guys in the suite might object to me being gay."

We all laughed.

"New topic?" Asked Alexander.

"I broke up with Felix"

Whooooooop both guys were cheering and slapping my back.

"Shit, that was insensitive, do you need cheering up?" Peter was leering at me as Alexander was hugging me from behind kissing my shoulder, rubbing my chest.

"Peter I do think he needs cheering up" Alexander pulled my shirt off.

Peter kissed me and unbuckled my belt, Alexander was kissing my neck, nibbling at me.

"Jay, can we cheer you up?" asked Alexander rubbing my crotch "you seem a little up already"

I groaned my consent.

They striped me and themselves and were kissing and touching me, I was rock hard and so excited I didn't want to think beyond the moment. I really didn't care what it meant, two hot guys with big dicks wanted me.

They lay me on the rug, Alexander pulled down cushions and pillows to make things more comfortable.

They lay either side of me kissing and touching me. I was sighing and enjoying looking down at their blonde heads at work. Peters cock was leaking as much as mine, I wanted to taste it.

"Alexander please fuck me, my ass missed your big dick."

His smile lit up the room as he took his mouth to my crack.

"Peter your cock looks so damp, bring it here so I can clean you up"

I know Alexander loves it when I'm forward, I'm excited as he moans between licks, knowing I'm turning him on as much as he is me.

Peter is kneeling by my head and I turn to take him in my mouth, his precum is wonderful and I lap it in. Alexander's tongue is probing at my hole, damn I missed his tongue as much as his cock.

"You're tight" Alexander said as his fingers work on my hole.

"It's been a while"

"Really?" Asked Peter "Felix doesn't share his nice dick"

"No he's a bitch in and out of bed"

Peter pushes his cock back in to shut me up. No one wants to think of Felix right now.

Alexander is pushing in, he leans forward to kiss me, I let Peter out for a moment, turned on further at the thought of Alexander tasting Peter on my tongue.

He leans back giving me the long slow strokes I like as he watches me sucking Peter.

"Let's move to your side so Peter can suck you too. We're meant to be making you feel better not using you as a fuck toy."

Once he starts thrusting again Peter lies down and takes me, I enjoy the fuck and suck for a moment before continuing my assault on Peters dick and balls, man I'd never noticed how big his sack was before. He smells amazing, I know I can't last long.

Alexander catches me by surprise as the first to start coming, as soon as his grunts start Peter and I join him, sucking each other dry.

"Come on you two, share"

We move to kiss each other swapping cum from mouth to mouth.

I'm in shock, I can't believe what we've done. As we continue to kiss I realise I'm already rock hard again.

"Oh dear, are you still upset?" Asks Alexander in a silly voice stroking my cock.

Mmmmm.

"That was a delightful fuck but my ass is feeling empty, I need more. Maybe I do need to be a fuck toy for you guys"

I grabbed a cock in each hand and kissed them in turn, they were both hard, clearly it was a great night all round.

"Peter please fuck me hard, I'm ready." I got on to all fours and Peter moved behind me. "Alexander, fuck my face"

He grinned. I loved being in charge but still submitting to their cocks. I felt like a total slut and I was loving it.

The guys didn't hold back. Peter fucked me hard and was loud about it. Alexander gave me no time to catch much breath, I felt like I was on edge to explode the whole time, it was amazing.

My cries were muffled by Alexander's cock, he pulled out and pushed me up by my shoulders so he could watch me shoot, Peter was coming as I tightened round his cock, as he pulled out Alexander pulled me into a kiss and came on my belly as we knelt face to face.

I groaned and rolled onto my back. It must have been 2 or 3 am. We lay for a moment a sticky mess.

"Let's walk to the shower nude" grinned Alexander. He grabbed 3 towels and some soap. We walked down letting it all hang out, we didn't see anyone, I almost wished we had. I wanted the world to know I'd handled these two studs.

We squeezed into a single stall and soaped up, washing and kissing.

Back in the room we cracked the window despite the cold as the room stank. Alexander mopped cum off the rug and sprayed with carpet cleaner, I marvelled at his housekeeping. Peter got into bed with me. Alexander bent to kiss us both goodnight.

Alexander

Jay looked so cute all sleepy, I can't say I wasn't jealous that it was Peter in his bed. I leaned in and kissed him, he was already drifting off. I whispered in his ear

"I love you" he smiled and kissed me, murmuring.

I got into bed, shit I had to set an alarm I had a study group at 10. I watched Jay sleep for a few moments before drifting off.

My alarm went too soon, it was under my pillow so not to disturb my sleeping lovers. I got dressed quickly, then stopped to write a note to Jay.

Last night was so amazing. Thanks for being so cool about my secret. I really love you a lot. I'm totally, utterly in love with you Jay. I hope you've forgiven me, I'd love to be your boyfriend. I've missed you so much.

I've study group this morning, but will be back soon.

All my love

Alexander

I pinned it to the fridge with a magnet, kissed Jay lightly so not to wake him then headed to piss and clean my teeth and ran to the library.

It was super hard to concentrate on the math problems, I kept thinking of Jay and boning up. I forced myself to concentrate, the faster we were done the sooner I'd see my love. We eventually finished and reviewed everything. My study friends were smart and I was confident we'd done a great job.

I fished out my phone expecting something from Jay, nothing, I was about to call and let him know I was on my when when I saw a bunch of incomprehensible texts from Eric thanking me and telling me to hurry to our dining hall so I could meet Clifford.

I remembered Eric's room mate was called Clifford but I knew he was straight and wasn't studying anything related to my courses, he was a bit of a dick to Eric so I had no desire to meet him. It had been a rough month but I had enough friends.

I got to the dining hall and the next 20minutes are a hazy blur. Eric called me over, Aaron started shouting thank you at me and Eric was hugging me and introducing me to Clifford. As he shook my hand he said something about being glad I was his new room mate.

"Eric's all moved out do you need lunch or can you move now?"

"What? Move?"

Then I saw Peter with his arm round Jay kissing him and my world stopped. My appetite gone I followed Clifford back upstairs, he gave me a key and showed me the room. It was a tiny shithole, clearly a single with a extra bed, it only had furnishings for 1 so we had to share and there wasn't much space. He told me he had practice and he'd see me later.

I went to my room like a zombie, there was no sign of my note, read or otherwise. I packed up my clothes and books and stripped the bed. I was crying so hard I couldn't see. I left the furnishings and microwave there was no room in the new cell anyway.

I dragged my stuff across the hall and dumped it all on my new bed. I went back and checked I had everything, picked up my laptop and left my key on the desk.

I cried until there were no tears left as I unpacked. I made my bed and slept.

I went back into my avoid Jay routine, I got up early to make sure I didn't see him in the bathroom and on the weekends showered at the gym, I avoided the common room I worked out, I hooked up with guys from the gym, I studied my ass off. I wanted to get all papers and projects wrapped up before the long weekend so I could have a clear run at finals.

I couldn't be mad at Peter and Jay for getting together, they were both free agents, I was surprised but it was far, far, less surprising than Jay and Felix. I was just so mad at them for not discussing the room change and at Jay for saying nothing at all but I guess id never known him that well. I felt that I couldn't confront them as I worried they'd leak my secret or worse sell the story of our threesome.

My social life wasn't entirely over, I still saw Jamie and Emma, they were my weekly treat, my small dose of normality. I was forever grateful that they didn't drop me even though I wasn't much fun, and they did a great job of keeping me from total despair.

Jamie had no clue what had happened, he didn't see the other guys and Felix was fucking the RA on the floor below and spent most of his time in his boyfriends single. So Jamie was as out the loop as I was.

Blondie also reached out and we grew close, he had distanced himself from the rest of the group, he was unhappy with how Aaron was treating Eric and how things had happened over the rooms. He was angry on my behalf that I had ended up in the shitty small room and that Jay hadn't asked me himself about moving.

The week before Thanksgiving he told me he was worried he and Brian were in trouble, awful as it sounds his troubles were a welcome distraction to my own and I'd hang out in his room chatting late into the night, reassuring him that if it was over he'd find someone else.

Brian loved Blondie but was stressed over schoolwork and thought the relationship was becoming a distraction. They had cut right back on time together and Blondie was rightly fed up but clinging on in the hope it would be okay again after finals.

Three friends was more than I'd had most my life and as Thanksgiving approached my funk lifted and I started to think of the good stuff. My body looked amazing, I had so much definition on my chest, abs and back and my legs were strong and my arms bulging if I do say so myself. I was doing well in all my classes, I was loving my studies and being single wasn't the worst thing.

A few days before Thanksgiving break it was unseasonably warm. I went for a run near campus and saw a house for sale. It was a beauty, stone built with turrets in a corner plot with what looked like a big garden, it also had a large triple garage with an apartment over it.

As living in dorms was not working out I knew I'd be living off campus sophomore year. I called the real estate agent and they showed me round after classes. I called my lawyer and business manager to ask if I could afford it, letting them know I'd be getting roommates to help with costs and the garage apartment could bring in money. I explained it needed remodeling but I had no idea what that would cost.

They laughed at me.

"Son you can afford it, that is not an issue, do you never read the statements I send?" my business manager John asked. "I've not been to my po box since school started, I don't want that stuff coming to the dorms. I've no where to keep things private"

"I'll email them from now on, doofus, you're a very rich young man, you've worked hard for it. You need to keep tabs on me and Mart to make sure we're not defrauding you. Has your allowance been okay?"

"Other than books and food I don't spend much, the dining hall sucks so I eat off campus a lot but nothing expensive. If anything the allowance is too much. So I can buy the house?"

"The house is a great idea, that close to school it'll be an easy sell later, so we best be quick off the mark now if you're certain its for you. I'll contact the guy at the firm who did your Seattle sale and he can handle the offer and finances for the purchase. Do you want to look at other places first?" Asked Mart my lawyer.

"No, I love this one and it's close to school but I'll need a car."

"Just let me know how much, when you need it, call any time. When you start the renovation all bills can come to this office, that goes for insurance, taxes and utilities too. Let my boys earn their keep for once." Said John.

"Now your agents assistant Sal comes from out your way, I think her family are in the building trade, I'll get on to her to see if she can recommend people to do the renovation. Do you just need tradesmen or do you need an architect too?"

"I don't know, the garage apartment needs a total redo and the house needs an extra bathroom and another moved"

"Put your ideas in an email to Sal, I'll call her to expect it, she'll help don't worry."

"Thanks Mart, thanks John"

"Son we mean it when we say call any time. We're the closest thing you have to family now, I wish it wasn't true but Mart and I love you and will be the best fake uncles a boy can have. So start sending us your grades and let us know what you're up to."

I laughed.

"Now I heard from your agent Blair that you're coming to LA over Christmas break for the screening. Please come to us for dinner at least once and make sure you stop in the office, I think John will want to show off what he's done with your money and I'll go through all the legals on the house."

"And start thinking if there are other investments you want to make. You should have more say now you're an adult. See you soon"

I cried after the call. I'd avoided talking to Mart after Dad died, I hated that he had made us go through the emancipation when he did and I'd blamed him for dads death, for being the first to give up hope. I knew he and John did their best for me and I felt I now had 5 friends not 3. It was a great day.

Thanks for reading. That Jay is a fickle one.

Please send any comments and feedback to mansambambam@gmail.com or mansambam.tumblr.com

Next: Chapter 5


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