From Whence I Came

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Crown Vic to a Parallel World: From Whence I Came The second installment of the ongoing adventures of Church Philips

15

A Stroll, A Movie, and A Request

Joe was quietly smug the whole way back to the house. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of admitting that I enjoyed the mass and liked Father Miller. The experience had opened my eyes to what the faith had become, or at least what that small pocket of the faith had become in the almost thirty years I'd been away from it. That didn't mean I was going back, but the mass helped to quiet some of the demons in my memory.

We returned to the house and all of us changed out of our church clothes. We had a quick lunch, and the group splintered after the meal. Joe and Mary sat down to discuss what to do about her and Zeke. Andy asked Bem if he wanted to play video games. Bem said he'd try anything once and followed the boy upstairs. The twins stayed in the living room to play some kind of game that I couldn't grasp. Shawn wanted some `alone time' with me, so we decided to go for a walk.

"I've missed you." He said as we strolled into the afternoon heat. "I've missed being alone with you. The bath last night was nice, but nowhere near enough."

I agreed with Shawn. "I've missed you to. I'm sorry everything has been so crazy since we got here. I can't even blame your uncle for this one."

"When we get back, I'm putting my foot down with uncle." Shawn promised. "I don't want to go anywhere for anyone for a very long time."

I was thrilled. When we got married, all we could talk about was having time to ourselves. Since then, we hadn't had any. I grabbed Shawn's hand and squeezed it. "If we weren't on a public street, I'd kiss you until your toes curled!" I whispered.

"Ooooohh...promise? You can try that on me later." He whispered back.

Reality crashed in and ruined my fantasy. "Yeah, except what do we do with Bem?" I complained. I hungered for Shawn, needed him. The session the night before, though physically satisfying, did little to sate my appetite for my husband's body and mind. If anything, I felt like I ate the appetizer but never got the meal. My increasing hunger gave me an idea.

"Do you want to get a hotel room tonight?" I asked. It was a long shot, but I was groping for any possibility. "Bem seems much better, and he could stand one night away from me. We could catch up, spend some time alone, really enjoy each other...maybe several times."

Shawn sighed and I knew what the answer would be. "I'd really like to, but I don't want to be rude to Joe. There's also so much going on at the house, I don't think we should be away, even for one night."

"I know." I sighed to match his. "And now with Mary and the girls there, even getting the bedroom to ourselves is problematic. I'd try to get Bem to bunk in with my brother, but I'd be afraid Joe would wake up in the middle of a new experience."

We both chuckled at the idea. I had a very clear mental image of a red-faced, mortified Joe and an innocent Bem trying to explain how he was just trying to help. `I thought it would be therapeutic, waking up to a blow job always makes me feel better.' I heard Bem say. I shared the image with Shawn and was rewarded with his ringing laugh that I hadn't heard in a while.

"I appreciate you putting up with my family and me." I said to return to reality when our laughter had subsided. "The relationships have always been complex, and I let the past get the better of me sometimes, like this morning. I'm sorry about that."

"Don't worry about it. I've been getting flashes of your childhood since we arrived. Everywhere I look in that house I see ghosts. So many bitter memories. I feel like I understand you better now that I've seen it. It's a wonder any of you turned out at all." Shawn had a sudden qualm about what he'd said. "I'm sorry, was that too far?"

"No, you're right." I offered with a verbal shrug. "It was tough growing up here. You didn't have it easy either, so I don't mind you voicing your opinion. I'm worried about how all this is going to end. What's going to happen to Mary and her kids? She can't go back to Zeke. Will he come after her when we're gone, try to get custody of the twins? Is Joe going to come with us so he can get better? I know how he is. He promised to think about it, but that almost always means a refusal. Did we help by coming here or just stir things up?"

Shawn was still holding my hand. He squeezed it like I needed a reminder of his presence. "You always help. Don't doubt yourself so much. Tell Mary to come with us too. We can afford to help her get started and the twins are young enough to assimilate into Solum life without even realizing it's different. Maybe we can buy the building next to ours, the one with apartments with two and three bedrooms, or we can build a big house somewhere. As for Joe, we'll persuade him. Uncle will give him a job. With Joe's power of truth, uncle would be furious if we didn't bring him back. Andy will do fine. He's older, but he seems open-minded enough to switch worlds. He's fascinated by your stories and gets along great with Bem."

I listened to my husband. His monologue gave me reason to hope. Shawn's natural confidence made his statements sound like foregone conclusions. I hoped he was right.

Shawn and I strolled along, hand-in-hand and lost in our own thoughts until a screech and a cackle split the suburban quiet like a thunder-crash. "Church Philips, get over here and say hello to an old woman!" A high sharp wheezing voice demanded. The shrill voice that sounded like an asthmatic parrot had come from a shrunken old crone in a porch rocker. She was nothing but baggy, wrinkled skin hanging on long bones. Scraggly white hair fell unevenly passed her shoulders, and she was wrapped in a blanket despite the August heat. She pointed a skeletal finger at me.

"My God, Shawn," I gasped as I recognized the woman, "it's Misses Barrett."

I opened a rusty chain-link gate and led us up a walk of broken concrete to the sagging, dry rotted porch of an old and ill maintained bungalow. Shawn and I stood in the dusty yard at the edge of the railing-less porch. The old woman looked down on us from her perch and gathered the dingy red and white checked blanket closer around her body.

"Hello, Misses Barrett." I greeted the old woman as respectfully as I knew how. "How have you been?"

"You can skip that nonsense young man." Misses Barrett crowed as she waggled an arthritic finger at me. "I know you better than that. Where have you been? Not so much as a Christmas card in more than twenty years! The nerve."

"I'm sorry, Misses Barrett. I assumed you were dead."

Shawn's eyes crawled sideways in his head to stare at me and express his shock at my snide reply. The old woman grinned. Her parted lips showed off an even row of store-bought teeth. "You always were an ill-mannered little fucker." Misses Barrett accused. "Who's this?" She demanded and pointed at Shawn. "Boyfriend?"

"Husband." I admitted.

"I knew it!" Misses Barrett screeched with vindication. "What's his name?"

I made the formal introductions. "Shawn Summas, meet Misses Agnes Barrett, Misses Barrett, this is Shawn Summas."

"Shawn, huh?" Misses Barrett looked him up and down with blatant appraisal. "I tried to get this one between the sheets once a week for five summers, well, three...had to wait for him to be legal. He cut my grass from when he was fifteen to when he moved out of his parent's house. He'd be over here, pushing the lawnmower, shirtless, sweat running off his fit, teenaged body." The old woman ran a liver-colored tongue over bloodless lips in a leering gesture. "I figured he was a man's man. He never took me up on my offers. Now he's back looking like the cover of a romance novel, I'm too damn old, and he plays for the wrong team."

"Thank you for the compliment, Misses Barrett." I hoped that agreeing with her would put an end to her alarming story.

"That's enough." She waved her skeletal arms and loose skin to shoo us from her presence. "Go away before you stir my blood. I'm too old to stir. Go do whatever it is you do while you can. When you're my age, you'll regret not doing it more."

"Yes, Misses Barrett." I said in patronizing singsong.

"It was nice to meet you ma'am." Shawn gave a short, respectful bow.

The old woman's sharp cackle split the air again. "You ARE a liar, Shawn. You're a nice, well-built liar though." Misses Barrett told him with a terrifying leer and a sound from her throat like she was enjoying dessert. "Church, you let him have his way tonight. You let him have his way for being kind to a woman who should be dead."

I promised with no sincerity, then led Shawn down the walk, through the gate, and away with a wave. Shawn waited until we were out of the old woman's line of sight to speak. "That was the creepiest experience of my life. Did she just order us to have sex and for me to be in charge?"

"That's exactly what she did. She's always been batshit crazy. She used to ask me the details of my `high school conquests.'" I recalled with a shudder.

"Did she really try to get you in bed?"

"Not really, she was less direct than that. She used to steal my sweaty t-shirts."

"She what?" Shawn asked, clearly horrified at the idea.

I explained. "After I turned eighteen, she started to invite me in when I was done cutting and told me not to bother putting my shirt back on. The first few times I went in, I left my shirt hanging in my back pocket because the air-conditioned house cooled me off faster that way. She'd pay me and give me a diet soda, always in a glass, so I'd have to stay and drink it with her. One day she grabbed my shirt from my pocket and inspected it. She found a tiny hole near the collar and offered to stitch it up for me. She wouldn't take `no' for an answer and that was the last time I saw that shirt. I never went in that house without putting my shirt back on again."

"She's scarier than I thought." Shawn shook his head, then he laughed. "You've got something in common, you and she."

I didn't believe what Shawn said. I couldn't imagine having anything in common with that crazy old woman. "What are you talking about?"

Shawn grinned a teasing grin that would have been more at home on Bem's face. "You and she...you both like the smell of men."

"I..." I tried to object, until I realized that he was right. "It's true." I admitted with a shrug.

"I know it is." Shawn said through his grin. "You're always scenting me...and Bem when he's around."

I felt a little defensive about my love of Shawn's musk. I asked him a question I'd asked him before. "Is that weird?"

Shawn took my hand and squeezed it. He brought it to his lips and kissed the back of it then let our clasped hands fall between us as we walked. "You know how I feel about that. I don't quite understand the intensity of the attraction you have for the way I smell. I really don't get how aroused you get when you get into a `musk hunt' when you sniff and lick all the different parts of me, but it flatters me. I like the way you smell. When we're together, and I'm in your arms, I like being surrounded by your scent. It makes me feel safe and protected."

"I worry sometimes." I admitted. "I worry you'll think I'm creepy."

Shawn reassured me, like he always does. "No judgement, Love. Never any judgement. It's like the way you like my legs and I like your back. It's just another facet of your attraction to me. I'd be more worried if you were repulsed by the way I smelled."

I squeezed Shawn's hand back. "Thanks."

Shawn shifted the subject back to old Misses Barrett. "The difference is, we're in love. The fact that she stole your shirt...that's what makes her creepy. Like she's a stalker or something."

"A shirt stalker." I laughed.

Shawn laughed with me. He had a question when he settled. "After she stole your shirt, why did you keep cutting her grass?"

I rubbed my neck with my free hand as my mind wandered over that time of my life. "She paid pretty well, and she was a lonely old woman. She was creepy as hell, but she was nice to me. Not many people were nice to me in those days."

Shawn felt bad as I related my lonely past, but he didn't say anything. There really wasn't anything to say. I'd told him a story with no moral...these events happened and that's all there is. Nothing needed to be added. We lapsed into silence and continued our stroll.

Soon, we returned to Arlington Avenue in the natural progression of having circled the development. We'd been gone for over an hour and I looked forward to getting out of the heat. I opened the front door to the startled looks of Joe and Mary. They were still at the dining room table, and from the way they stared, I assumed we'd interrupted them in the middle of a heavy conversation. "How much time do you need?" I asked as we entered the house.

Joe said he thought they could be done by dinner.

I glanced into the kitchen to see what time the microwave said it was. Just after two,' I thought, need to kill about three hours.' I had an idea, clapped my hands, and shouted to the house. "Come on everyone, we're going to see a movie! Get your shoes on and get out front."

Mary's girls bounced up from the family room, as excited and full of energy as eight-year-olds can be. Andy and Bem drifted down from Andy's room. They seemed less than thrilled over having their gametime interrupted, but they went along without complaint. I stood at the front door to count people out of the house like a ticket-taker at a carnival. The last one missing was Shawn.

I felt him near the back of the house and craned my head around the short wall that blocked the sunroom from view. I saw that Shawn was talking to Mary in low tones. They seemed to be wrapping up, so I waited. As their conversation finished, Mary gave Shawn an awkward hug, which he returned. I felt apprehension release from him and turn into relief.

Shawn walked away from Mary, through the dining room, and passed me on his way out of the house. I turned to follow. As I reached the door, Joe called out his thanks. I waved and pulled the door shut. Shawn was waiting on the front walk to tell me about his chat with Mary. "She apologized." He announced. "She said she was happy for us, that we clearly love each other and are good for each other. She's sorry for judging and being such a bitch. Her words, not mine."

I slipped my arm around my husband and pulled him close as we made our very slow way down the walk toward the car. I told Shawn some of what Mary and I had discussed that morning. "Mary said she wanted to apologize but was worried you'd reject her. I encouraged her to try anyway, that you aren't one to hold a grudge. I'm glad she did it, and if she swore, you know she meant it. Mary never swears, that's why she sounds like a Jane Austin novel sometimes. Are you two OK now?"

Shawn objected to my culture reference. "You've never read a Jane Austin novel in your life." He accused me with a smile.

I smiled back at him because he was right. "I read the `Cliff's Notes.'" I admitted. "That was enough for me."

Shawn shook his head and returned to what he'd been saying about his exchange with Mary. "She's troubled. I don't hold her words against her. They hurt, but not enough for me to make her suffer more by refusing to accept her apology."

"Thanks. It means a lot to me that you two get along."

Shawn and I got near the car, and I tried to shift myself into `outing mode.' I wanted to generate some enthusiasm in the crowd that was fooling around at the curb so I tried to be as boisterous as I could. "EVERYBODY IN THE CAR!" I shouted and clapped my hands some more. "MOVIE TIME! YAY! YAY! MOVIE TIME!"

The twins agreed with little girl shouts of, "yay, movie time." Andy agreed with a very teenage, muttered mocking "yay...movie time." Bem poked the boy's side to get him to flinch, which he did. The two adolescents devolved into a match of poking each other in the side while demanding that the other "quit it," over and over until they both broke up laughing. I chuckled at their fun and got in the car.

As we set off, Andy confirmed that the twenty-six screen mega-plex was still across the street from the Cherry Hill Mall and that they still had movies playing at least as frequently as every half hour. I figured we'd find something to watch. We rode over and parked.

Bem was amazed at the massive commercial center that was the mall and movie mega-plex. Solum had nothing like it, and he gushed with leering comments about the physical size of everything. He made plenty of whispered comparisons between the hugeness of everything around us and my size and the size of my individual bits. I asked him to stop so Andy wouldn't hear and to my complete surprise, he did.

We went in and got tickets to a blockbuster action film. It seemed the perfect selection for a bunch of kids and Bem; no plot to worry about and lots of big special effects. We stopped at the concessions stand where I spent far too much money on a grocery-bag-sized containers of popcorn and mop buckets of soda for each person, then we found the right number theater. I shoved the swing door open and held it for everyone to pass through. I was pleasantly surprised when I followed the crowd inside. The theater was completely empty because the movie had been out for a while. Perfect,' I thought, no bullshit but that which we brought with us.'

Shawn and I climbed to the highest and farthest corner of the theater's stadium seating and sat next to each other. The four children, Bem included, spent the previews climbing up and down the stairs and arguing over the best spot to sit. I didn't intervene. I refused to be a parent. Instead, I took on the role of irresponsible babysitter. The group continued to wander and talk and challenge each other through the end of the previews and the opening sequence to the film.

I'd planned to spend the movie holding hands with Shawn and maybe whispering mushy love back and forth. Instead, as soon as the lights went out, Shawn climbed in my lap and kissed me. He stayed there through the entire film. We necked and groped like teenagers while the kids and Bem ran wild.

Ninety minutes later, when the lights came up, I was ashamed. Shawn and I were red-faced, sweaty, and disheveled. Our clothes were in disarray from groping each other through and under them. My long hair was mussed from Shawn winding it around his fingers while he sucked on my face and kissed my neck. The theater was in even worse shape than Shawn and me.

It seemed that in the absence of supervision, the twins had taken up positions on one side of the theater while Andy and Bem took their own positions on opposite side. The two contingents had used their popcorn as ammunition in a battle royale that I assumed mimicked the action on the screen. I don't think a single kernel was eaten. It was all used to throw around.

Shawn climbed out of my lap and paused to laugh at me. He leaned in and used his delicate fingers to smooth my hair down. When he was satisfied with my appearance and we'd settled enough for most of the lusty flush to be gone from our faces, we collected the group and herded them toward the exit.

I thought about scolding the children and Bem for making a mess of the theater, but I decided not to. As the supposed adult, I was as much to blame for the mess as they were. Besides that, I wasn't anyone's father. It wasn't my job to teach lessons or moralize. My job, as I saw it, was to be responsible enough to take the kids out and return them home in almost the same condition as when they left. As long as no one got hurt or killed, my responsibility was fulfilled. That's what I told myself anyway.

I lingered in the theater to slip twenty-dollar bills into the hands of the clean-up crew coupled with a series of apologies. The cleaners pocketed the cash with appreciative grins and went to work on the mess.

When I caught up with the others, I asked Andy to check on his father to see if we could come home or if I needed to take the group to the mall for another hour or two. A quick phone call got us the `all clear' so we proceeded to the house.

When we got home, Mary was bustling around the kitchen while Joe worked on his laptop at the table. I jumped in to help get dinner together and tried to start conversation. "What did you guys figure out?" I asked.

Mary started to say something, but Joe cut her off from the other room. "After dinner will do for that." He barked and went back to work on his laptop.

Mary and me, with some last-minute help from Shawn, got the meal on the table and gathered the group to eat it. As we sat, Mary asked us about the movie. No one could tell her much. Shawn and I didn't see any of it because we were suctioned to each other's faces from lion's roar to credits. The other four spent an-hour-and-a-half rough-housing in the dark, so they didn't know anything either. Finally, I had to admit to turning four children loose in an empty theater and then ignoring them. I expected Mary to disapprove. Instead, she laughed.

When the meal was over and cleaned up, the children and Bem were banished to the family room for games while Mary, Joe, Shawn, and I sat in the dining room to see what was decided. Mary stood from the table like she was getting ready to give a speech. "I'm getting a divorce." She announced and only paused long enough to get a breath before moving on. "Joe is working on the paperwork. After the other night, finding out about all that money and then him lashing out at me, I'm done."

Mary raised her right hand to gesture to Shawn and me. "Seeing the love that you two have for each other made me think that...maybe...maybe I could find some happiness to." She paused like something big was coming and rubbed her nervous hands together. "Joe told me about the offer you made to take him to the other world. He hasn't made up his mind yet, but whatever he decides, I want to formally ask you to take me and the twins with you when you leave."

I was floored. I didn't think Mary knew what she was asking and questioned her to see. "Do you understand what that means?" I asked. "You'd need to come to terms with how people live on Solum. There is no Catholic faith. You won't be able to raise the girls in the Church. Sexual attitudes are liberal to say the least and you'll have to be OK with that. Things are different, better in many respects but not all. You have to accept all of it, or none of it. That's how it has to be."

Mary fidgeted with the tablecloth. She tugged at the hem of the vinyl and straightened the way the corner fell over the corner of the table before she answered. "That's what Joe and I have been discussing all afternoon. I want to raise the girls to believe in God, but I don't need the church to do that. I can teach my girls to love God without the ceremony."

Mary paused for another breath, again like something big was coming, before she went on. "I want Hannah and Leah to enjoy life, not be sacrificed to it. I want them to be happy. If I can give them a good life, a positive life, I can't imagine God would throw me into torment for that. Also, I can't think of a cleaner way to get away from my husband and make sure he can't contaminate my girls with his evil. Can we go? Will you take us with you? I swear we will never be a burden to you."

Mary's eyes pleaded with us. I looked to Shawn to defer the decision to him. I already knew that he would agree, but I didn't want Mary to know that. She needed to understand that I was not the gatekeeper.

Shawn nodded to her. "Yes, Mary, you're welcome to come."

Mary ran around the table to Shawn. He barely had a chance to get to his feet before she was wrapped around him. "Thank you." She whispered. "Will you be my brother to?" She asked with a small, uncertain voice.

"I'd be proud to." Shawn agreed with a sniff. Suddenly, they were both fighting back tears. "I always wanted a sister."

"Thank you, Shawn." She squeezed him tighter.

"OK, it's OK. You better stop, or Church will get jealous." He teased to deflect the emotional moment.

Mary pulled away from Shawn and laughed a choked, half-sob laugh. She hugged me as well before she returned to her place at the table.

It was Joe's turn to speak. "I've drawn up papers for a quick, uncontested divorce where Mary will retain full-custody of the girls and control of her own personal assets. Zeke will keep the house and cars. He's probably going to need some persuading to agree."

"I'll handle that." I said flatly.

"WE," Joe emphasized while he scowled along the table at me, "will handle that. I'm not having you go over there and threaten his life again. If he can get anyone to believe he signed these papers under duress, he can repudiate the agreement and Mary won't be here to fight him. She could be labeled a kidnapper of her own kids. We need to do this carefully and it may cost some money. Money is Ezekiel's weak spot."

Joe turned to Shawn. He pressed his palms together and alternately intwined and separated his fingers in a motion I would have called nervous on anyone but Joe. "Shawn, do you have any say over the disposition of the investments that are about to be in your name? Would your uncle be willing to part with some money to help us? I'll figure out how to pay him back."

"How much are we talking about?" Shawn asked. I knew he didn't care about the money, but he cared about what his uncle thought. I was certain that he asked about the amount only because he wanted to be cautious about what he agreed to.

Joe's hands came to rest with his palms flat on the tabletop. "If we have to pay the whole two-hundred thousand, that's about three years of household income for middle class people like Mary and me. When compared to the total value of the investments, it's five percent of one percent."

"Take the money." Shawn decreed as an instant response. I suspected the percentage that Joe presented sold Shawn. When spoken of in dollars, two-hundred-thousand seemed a large sum, but as a percentage of the total value of the investments, it seemed paltry. "Don't worry about paying it back." Shawn continued with his proxy generosity. "Uncle will be happy he was able to help."

"You can't..." Mary started to object when Shawn interrupted.

"When I tell him, we spent it to help his niece, he'll be fine."

Mary choked back a sob. "After all I said..."

Shawn rushed to reassure her. "It's fine. You apologized and it's buried now. Don't give it another thought. I'm glad we're in a position to help."

Mary calmed down and dried her eyes. "I'm alright, just overwhelmed."

"Good." Joe skipped the emotional display. "I'll finish up the paperwork between tonight and tomorrow and we'll plan to visit Ezekiel on Tuesday."

"What about you?" I asked Joe.

"I haven't made up my mind." He snapped. "Don't push me."

My brother's curtness warned me off, and I let the matter drop. When Joe talked like that, it paid to leave him alone. He set the laptop back on the table and continued his work. Mary and Shawn fell into conversation. That seemed like a good thing to me. I wanted them to get to know each other and figured they'd be more open if I didn't hover. I excused myself and went to check on the kids. They were gathered around the family room television to watch my favorite Dreamworks movie. It was a coming-of-age film all about Vikings and cartoon dragons. The movie had just started, so I settled on the couch next to Bem to watch with them.

"Everything alright?" He asked.

"Yeah, the car is gonna be crowded on the way back to Solum."

"Joe?"

"Not yet, Mary and the twins."

"I'm glad." Bem said like he really was. "If she was going to stay here, I would've had to kill Zeke." He made the last statement with enough sincerity to make me uncomfortable. For just a second, he sounded like he meant it.

I draped my arm around Bem. "You're a good man, my friend. I've missed you a lot these last years. I almost forgot how much fun you are to have around."

Bem turned to whisper to me. "I know what you missed." His voice leered and he stuck his tongue in my ear. I yelped and batted him away. The three kids who were laying on the rug in front of us turned to scowl at me for interrupting the movie. Bem used his angel face to make them think that I'd made the noise for no reason.

Bem leaned in again, and I pushed him away before I saw that, this time, he was serious. "I'm going to camp on the living room couch tonight." He whispered. "Andy will help me pull out the sofa bed and make it up. I saw you and Shawn at the theater. It's not fair for me to be in between you two every night."

I put my arm around Bem and drew him close. "I owe you one." I whispered.

"You owe me like five. You better be ready when the doc says go. I'm going to use some of that stuff I bought yesterday, and you won't get away until I'm finished." He ran his hand up the inside of my thigh and cupped my package, then quickly withdrew his hand. The contact, even as brief as it was brief, forced me to shift the way I sat so I could hide the chub he'd caused in my briefs.

"I'll be ready." I promised. "Watch the movie. It's a good one."

Bem watched the movie. I saw only flickering colors. My mind drifted with thoughts of Shawn and the hope that everyone went to bed early.