ZZ Top said, "Every girl's crazy about a sharp dressed man." Are they? I don't know about how women think, but I know I'm crazy about a sharp dressed man...or an undressed one for that matter. Let's see if we can tie this silliness into the chapter below.
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Crown Vic to a Parallel World: From Whence I Came The second installment of the ongoing adventures of Church Philips
27
Dressing for the Occasion
I sipped my coffee and let my eyes drift up and down the residential street that Joe lived on. Alden Park was a typical housing development from the days after the genius of William Levitt and his invention of the Levittown model. Every house on the block, really in the whole development, was the same with a few exceptions. Every other home was built as a mirror image of those next to it. Those that still wore the original aluminum siding, were painted in a standard set of primary colors, whites, reds, blues, and yellows. Many had been renovated, but their bones were all the same.
"Where do you suppose Bem and Mary are?" I wondered aloud to Shawn who kept me company on the patio. "It's almost four o'clock."
Shawn smirked with some rare mischief. "Maybe they flew to Reno to get a quickie wedding."
I shook my head at his suggestion and countered it with caution. "I'd think that was funny if I wasn't worried it was the truth."
"They're out as a sort of family." Shawn reasoned as he tried in vain to reassure me. "I'm sure they're just enjoying the day together."
We stood on the undersized patio and pondered the possibilities as we roasted in the late afternoon heat. I had another sip of coffee and tried to contain my imagination. It didn't work. My mind imagined crazy stuff like Bem and Mary eloping to some far away land. Them joining a traveling troupe of entertainers. Bem supporting the family with exhibitions of marksmanship and small feats of telekinesis while Mary raised the girls to be acrobats or tightrope walkers or something. I thought that maybe she would assume the role of teacher to `homeschool' the twins and the other carnie children.
My imagination was well on its way to conjuring something even more outlandish when Joe's status sedan, with Mary at the wheel, came around the far corner of the block. Its presence put a welcome end to my bizarre fantasies. The car pulled into the drive, stopped, and the engine clicked off. Bem hopped out first and opened the back door for Hannah and Leah. The twins bounced out of the car like they were shot from it and ran around the yard with that peculiar energy known only to children and small dogs. Mary got out more slowly and joined Bem for the short walk from the driveway to where Shawn and I stood.
"You guys certainly made a day of it." I commented without meaning.
"It was really nice." Bem commented with this look of beatific peace on his face. His voice was downright dreamy as he spoke. "We went to the park, then out to lunch at a diner. After that we played indoor min-i-a-ture golf." He enunciated the word `miniature' like the syllables were their own words.
Mary stood close to Bem with her hand on his shoulder. Bem's arm found its place around Mary's waist, his hand in her pocket. I was happy they were enjoying each other, but the situation still scared the hell out of me. "Who won the golf game?" I asked to keep the conversation moving.
"Oh, we didn't keep score." Mary waved my question away with her free hand. "We told the girls they won. It was fun just being together and teaching Bem the game. He's a natural." Mary raised the hand that was on Bem's shoulder to his face and caressed his cheek. The light beard that Bem wore made a rustling, scratchy sound in Mary's hand. Bem leaned into her touch like a dog that wants to be petted.
In the middle of their tenderness, the front door of the house opened behind me. Andy stood in the opening and made an announcement. "Uncle Church, the store called, Bem's suit is ready. They're open tonight until nine and in the morning at nine." Andy stepped onto the porch. Shawn and I moved apart to give him room. "Hello Aunt Mary, hey Bem." He greeted the recent arrivals.
"Hello Andy," Mary said as she smoothed Bem's face with longer strokes. "Did you have a nice day in the city?"
"Yes, we went to the Art Museum."
"Oh, a cultural outing." Mary observed with some surprise. "Good for you." Then to Bem she said, "let's get the girls in. They've had a big day and need to settle down before dinner."
"Anything you say." Bem replied to her. He leaned into her touch for one more face stroke, then unwound his arm from her waist and went to call the girls. They listened to him as soon as he said their names. Hannah and Leah ran to Bem, who bowed to the twin `princesses,' then led them through the door into the house.
Mary lingering on the porch for a moment. She'd taken the hand she'd been using on Bem's face and cupped her own cheek with it. "He's so good with them." She whispered as she passed into the house. As Mary went inside, she released the glass door to close on its own.
As soon as Mary was all the way inside the house, Andy, who was seemingly impatient to have the glass door shut, pushed it closed and latched it. He turned wide eyes to Shawn and me. "What's going on? I know they slept together last night, but I figured...I don't know. Are they a thing?"
Both Andy and Shawn looked to me. Andy waited for an answer and Shawn waited to see how much of the truth I was going to expose to my nephew. I came up with a partial truth for Andy. "Let's just say they're enjoying each other's company and leave it at that. The less said, the better I think."
"Uh huh." Andy grunted.
"Look kid," I snapped at Andy out of frustration, "I'll pretend it's the truth and you pretend to believe it, OK?"
I liked that Andy was perceptive, but it wasn't always a useful trait. I guess it was always useful to him, but it was less useful to me because I'd been charged with protecting the boy's innocence. Fat chance I had on that mission if Andy could see through every lie I uttered.
Andy got the message from my tone of voice and raised his hands in the posture of surrender. "No problem. I'll add it to the list." He waved to Shawn and me, pulled the door open, and retreated inside.
I stared into the street and fretted. Shawn took the empty coffee cup from me and held my hand. He traced his fingers around the scars and swollen knuckles on the back of it. "I promise it will all work out." He said softly.
I replied by parroting my nephew's overused phrase. "You pretend it's the truth and I'll pretend to believe it."
"Don't be like that." Shawn scolded and gripped my hand in his. "It will be fine. Everyone here is an intelligent adult. They're smart enough to make good choices. Stop taking everyone's troubles on your shoulders. You don't own any of what's happening here."
I kept my eyes on the street and gave vent to some anxiety that had been building up. "I feel like we're in the middle of the Cuban Missile Crisis. At any moment a mushroom cloud could erupt over this house. All it would take is one childish act or one misunderstood gesture for all this fragile harmony to explode into shouting, tears, and hurt feelings. This is the edge of the abyss, Shawn. Don't look down."
"Hey! Look at me." Shawn moved in front of me and pulled my face to his until our eyes locked. "Just focus on me. For the rest of the time we're here, whenever you feel anxious, focus on me. We're in this together and it will all be fine. If anyone gets out of line, I'll deal with them."
The idea of Shawn protecting me from my family gave me an internal chuckle. I surprised him by stealing a kiss. "I love it when you're aggressive." I said when I had use of my lips back.
Shawn didn't see the humor. "You are still infuriating." He whispered and took a quick sidestep around me to jerk the house door open.
"Hey, Hey," I called as I trailed after him, "Joe called me that the other day."
"Joe," I yelled to my brother who was at his normal spot at the dining room table, "tell Shawn I'm infuriating."
"I'm certain he already knows." Joe replied dryly.
Taco night was a huge success. Shawn and Mary and I got the meal together and laid out a huge spread of meats, rice, toppings, veggies, hard and soft shells, salsa, avocado, and even a mushroom-based meat substitute for Shawn and anyone else who wasn't feeling carnivorous. When we were finished, Andy and Bem led the clean-up effort while I wrapped up the leftovers.
"Bem, do you want to pick up your suit tonight?" I asked when everything was done, and the adults were having coffee around the table.
Bem turned to Mary. "Do you want to go to the mall tonight?"
When Bem deferred to Mary's judgement, I had to use all my focus to keep the shock off my face. I probably looked like I had a gas pain.
"That sounds good, I want to see your suit on you." Mary said to Bem, then to my brother, "Joe, can we use your car? That loaner of Church's is not my favorite to ride in."
I bristled at what I saw as my sister's attempt to take over my outing. "Uh, Mary. I like driving the Town Car and planned to drive it to the mall. I don't like Joe's car."
"That's fine," she dismissed my objection with a vague wave of her hand, "you can take the loaner and I'll take Bem in Joe's car."
"Mary," Bem interrupted, "why don't we just ride with Church. It will be more fun if we're all together."
Mary softened and leaned into Bem. "You're right. Let me run upstairs for a second and I'll be ready to go." Mary ascended the steps, and the bathroom door opened and shut.
Joe and I stared at Bem, both with the same expression of bewilderment. "How did you do that?" Joe asked like he'd witnessed Bem wring blood from a stone.
"What?" Bem asked. He seemed genuinely confused.
Joe voiced the question we both wanted the answer to. "How did you get Mary to change her mind? Once she decides something, that's the end of the discussion, always has been. What did you do to her? Do you have some kind of power we don't know about?"
Bem didn't seem to know what we were talking about. He shook his head. "I didn't...uhm...I just said we should ride together, and she agreed. Did I do something wrong?"
I remembered my discussion with Mary that morning and the explanation flashed in my brain. I rapped on the table to get Joe's attention. "He's got a power, I don't think it's magic, but it might be."
Joe got the message. He faced me but couldn't keep his eyes from sliding around to the still bewildered Bem. "You think that's it?"
"It makes a big difference," I added as I was also unable to keep my eyes off the man of many talents, "especially if no one did it right before him."
Bem's bewilderment vanished as he connected the dots of the conversation that Joe and I were having around the issue. He smirked with pride and sat a little taller in his chair.
Joe forced a neutral expression onto his face as Mary came down the stairs. Shawn stayed quiet through the exchange, but I could feel his lusty amusement. He knew full well how impressive Bem was at the art of pleasure. I guessed he thought our discussion, which danced neatly around the topic of sex without mentioning the act, was very Earth-like in its sensitivity.
"Andy, time to go to the mall." I shouted at the house.
"Be right down." Andy called from his room.
I stood up, as did Bem. Shawn remained in his chair. "I'm going to stay. Joe and I need to look over some papers the wealth managers faxed over while we were in the city, and someone should be here to help Joe look after the girls. Have fun."
I leaned down and gave Shawn a chaste kiss on the lips. "I'll miss you." I said.
"I'll miss you to." He replied and gave my forearm a squeeze.
Andy barreled down the steps, through the living room, and out the front door. "Come on everybody. LET'S GO!" He shouted from the front walk as the glass door swung on its closer.
I chuckled and hoped, for the clerk's sake, that everything about Bem's suit was exactly as it was ordered.
We made the mall in twenty minutes. Andy repeated his performance of running through the main gallery and dragging us behind. He got to the store well ahead of the rest of the group and was in the middle of hassling the clerk for Bem's suit when we caught up. The harried clerk handed the plastic wrapped garments to Andy who unwrapped them and made a thorough inspection. He approved of what he saw and handed them to Bem who he then shoved bodily into the dressing room to change.
I had a passing thought that I was glad Andy wasn't a telekinetic like me, or I assumed he wouldn't have settled for just telling Bem to change. I had a cartoony mental image of Andy forcibly changing Bem's clothes with telekinetic magic.
That thought led me to wonder what Andy's power would be. As I thought about that, I was glad there was no hurry to activate him. The dealings I'd had with the ever-incredulous Joe and his `power of truth' was plenty for one trip. I figured there'd be lots of time to activate Andy's magic and teach him to use it when we got to Solum...if we got to Solum. That thought started me worrying about Joe's decision again when Mary interrupted my brooding with a question.
"Why did you buy him a suit?" Mary asked me.
Even though we were well away from Andy and Bem, and Bem was in the fitting room, and Andy was hovering right outside the louvered door, I still drew Mary a little further away. I moved us until we were near a backless bench that was set between mirrored columns and in front of a table that was spread with a rainbow of buttoned-down shirts.
I tried to think of something to tell Mary that wasn't the truth, but I couldn't. As the truth was embarrassing, I flushed to the point that I was almost maroon, and my right hand found its way around my bracelet. "I can't tell you."
"Come on." Mary cajoled and wacked my upper arm with an open palm. "I can take it. Andy won't hear us if you keep your voice down. Tell me why."
Mary was a lot like Joe in one respect, when she wanted to know something, she'd worry at it like a puppy at the fringe of an expensive rug. I knew she wouldn't drop the subject until I told. I bowed to the inevitable and hoped the truth would embarrass Mary enough that she wouldn't ask anything else. "Alright," I relented, "Shawn looked practically edible in his suit. I had visions of using them for some role play when we got back to Solum. I thought about how much fun it would be if we could include Bem, so I asked Andy to pick something out for him."
Mary didn't get it and said as much. "What kind of role play? What are you talking about?"
`She can't really be this innocent,' I thought. I cupped my hands over Mary's ear and whispered what I'd said to Bem about how much fun it would be to strip him out of the complicated garments, teasing the whole time.
"OH!" Mary squeaked and jumped away from my whispers. "AHEM...uh...that does sound...AHEM...oh my...fun."
The sound of insistent rapping drew our attention away from our chat. The sound turned out to be Andy knocking on Bem's fitting-room door. The door opened just wide enough for Andy to slip in with Bem's pork pie hat and other accessories. The door closed and the sound of muffled voices and some bumping around in the small room followed.
Time passed and the door opened again, this time for Andy to slip out. He waved us over with frantic hands like he was signaling a rescue plane from a life-raft floating in shark-infested waters. Mary and I approached and gathered where Andy directed, in front of the closed dressing room door. Andy bowed and shoved the door wide.
Bem strutted out of the dressing room, twirled, and came to rest. He'd struck a pose with his weight on one leg, his hips cocked toward us, and his hands on his small waist like a model at the end of a catwalk. He looked amazing. The high buttoned vest and black of the suit made him look taller, the blue shirt brought out his eyes, and gold tie made him pop. The hat that he wore tilted over one eye made him look like the life of the party. Andy spun him like a club DJ scratching a record as he checked and straightened and smoothed.
The accessories that adorned Bem's suit amounted to a solitaire diamond stud tie tack, a gold strap watch with a black leather band, and a pair of very small, gold-framed, blue-lens glasses. The effect of these minor additions was massive. When Andy finally let Bem stand on his own, he turned to me, pushed the glasses down, and looked over the lenses with those sharp, cobalt eyes. Bem's gaze made me feel like I was his prey.
The sexual energy that Bem projected over those glasses went right to my crotch. I immediately needed to sit down to hide my inflating erection. I retreated and flopped on the bench that Mary and I had stood near earlier. Mary sat next to me.
Bem took our retreat as an opportunity to strut with more room to move. We watched him parade and pose some more. "What do you think, Mary?" Bem strutted over and struck a seductive pose, this time with his hips thrust out toward my sister. He trapped her in his penetrating gaze in an up-from-under look that Bem probably learned from Shawn.
"Take me, I'm yours." Mary whispered to him. I elbowed my sister to remind her that I was there. She flushed and stammered as she tried to cover her embarrassment. "Oh...nice...yes, you look very nice...uh, Bem. It fits you well and shows off your...ah...shows you off, I mean."
"Good, Mary." I leaned in and stage whispered. "You covered that perfectly. I don't think anyone noticed the drool running down your chin."
Mary reflexively wiped her mouth before her conscious mind caught up with what I'd said. She walloped my arm again and waved a threatening hand at me. "I would slap your face..." she trailed off to an embarrassed mutter, "if you weren't right. He looks amazing."
"I know." I admitted and heard the longing in my own voice.
Andy dragged Bem away to fuss over him some more. Without Bem to take all her attention, Mary spared some for me. "Are you OK? You seemed to collapse on this bench. Don't you feel well?"
"I'm fine. I just needed to sit down."
"Why? What's wrong?" Mary persisted. She was doing her puppy impression again, but I was less inclined to give her the answer this time.
"Can't a guy just need to sit down?" I demanded in the hopes that my hostility to the subject would dissuade Mary from pursuing it.
It didn't. If anything, my hostility made her curiosity stronger. "Yes, they can." Mary pressed. "Usually, they sit gently. Their legs don't just buckle under them."
I groaned inside my head. `Fine, Mary, you asked for it.' I thought. "It's that suit." I admitted under my breath.
"Why did you need to sit down because of Bem's suit?" Mary asked. In the next moment her mental lightbulb lit, and her eyes darted to the hand that was in my crotch, busily covering my erection. Mary broke up laughing.
"Have your fun, Mary." I scolded her gently. "Instead of enjoying my situation, you should be thanking me for the double gift I gave you."
"What double gift?"
"Introducing you to Bem and buying that suit."
"You're right." My sister hugged me sideways. "I owe you."
I raised my voice so Bem and Andy would know I was addressing everyone. "Alright, alright, that's enough. Bem, change back please. Your outfit is causing my sister and I some distress." Bem laughed and shook his head. He struck a pose for each of us and retreated to the dressing room.
"You picked another winner, Andy, well done." I congratulated.
Andy came over to our bench to talk while Bem changed. He's almost started when Mary was seized with a sudden need to shop. She jumped off the bench and hurried away on an errand she wouldn't explain, only pausing to tell us that she'd `be right back.' As she rushed off, Andy took her place next to me. "You did a great job, three times." I praised the boy "I think that suit may have broken your Aunt Mary."
"You both were watching Bem pretty hard." Andy grinned a knowing smile.
"Guilty." I said to add to the admissions I was making that evening.
"Bem is pretty hot." Andy admitted back to me. "Not that I'm into him or anything!" He rushed to clarify while some color rose in his face.
"Not into older men?" I asked.
"It's not that so much. I mean, Bem doesn't even look that old. It's...never mind." Andy shut down the conversation like he didn't want to admit something embarrassing.
I wanted to know what it was and pressed him. "What?" I asked and realized that I was as bad as Mary and Joe when it came to pressing people for embarrassing details. `Must be a Philips thing.' I thought with a mental shrug.
"I can't...ugh...I can't think of him...not THAT way. It's because of...you know...it's weird."
"What's weird?" I asked.
"Well, uh...I mean...Bem and you...and I guess, Shawn...I mean, you three have...uh, right?"
I guessed that Andy was asking me if Shawn and I had sex with Bem. I wasn't happy about discussing such things with my brother's fifteen-year-old kid, but I didn't want to lie to him. I hated when people lied to kids just because they were kids. I decided to be honest, or as honest as I could and still maintain the PG13 rating Joe had requested of me. "Yes, we have."
My admission confused Andy. "But...I thought that Bem and Aunt Mary had...uh...you know?"
"They did." I agreed.
Andy cocked his young head at me. "That's why I can't...you know...think of Bem...uh, that way. It's weird. Know what I mean?"
I sighed out a breath and rubbed Andy's shoulder. "I get it. I get exactly what you mean. If it makes you feel any better, it's fucking weird for me to."
"Uncle Church, is Bem...I mean...what is Bem? Is he gay, or bi? I thought I knew. Like when you first got here, and you were all together in Dad's bedroom, I assumed that...you know...but now...I'm confused."
`Bem is an opportunist.' I thought with a mental laugh, then I considered how to answer Andy's question. Bem and I had never discussed his sexual orientation. When he and I first met, I assumed he was gay from the way he came onto me. As we became parts of the team to save the world, Bem had sex with Neb several times during our training retreat in the Glosbe Mountains. That led me to believe he was bisexual. In the intervening years, I'd discovered that Bem selected partners of either sex with what seemed like equal enthusiasm.
I had to admit to myself that I didn't know Bem's orientation, or if he even had one. I reasoned that he didn't, but I didn't know how that was possible. I tried to explain to Andy what I knew about my friend and what I assumed I knew. "In my experience with Bem, he's equally happy with...uhm." I rubbed my neck and looked down into the young face of my nephew. He waited for my answer, and I wanted to give him one, but his fresh young face and his father's words about preserving the boy's innocence bothered me.
I tried to chart a middle path between Andy's curiosity and his youth. "Bem is attracted to people. Some of us fit into a neat box; like me and Shawn. We're attracted just to the same sex. Others, like your Dad and your Aunt Mary, are just attracted to the opposite sex. Bem doesn't fit into either box. I don't think I'd even say he's bisexual. Bem doesn't conform to labels. He likes people and, for him, it doesn't seem to matter if those people are men or women."
Andy thought about that for a second and came up with a question. "And...on Solum, that's OK? I mean...people don't mind."
"Nope, a lot of people on Solum are like Bem." I heard what I'd said and realized it wasn't true. I tried to explain. "That's not right. No one is like Bem. He's an individual. What I mean to say is that a lot of people don't conform to being homosexual or heterosexual. They are sexual beings and don't worry too much about...I'm not explaining this well." I said in frustration and rubbed my face with my palms.
"I think I get it, Uncle Church." Andy said to save me the agony of having to find more words to stumble over. "For Bem...do you think the way he is...do you think it makes things easier, or harder for him?"
"I think it's just different." I replied without knowing either way.
Bem picked that moment to walk out of the fitting room dressed in his street clothes. Andy popped up from his spot on the bench and went to collect and catalogue the suit and accessories. Everything was rewrapped in plastic and returned to the clerk. I paid the tab, and we exited the store to loiter in the main gallery and wait for Mary.
Mary walked up a few moments later, a little red in the face. She had a plain black shopping bag clamped under her arm. "I'm ready now." She announced and fell in with the group for the stroll to the parking lot.
I drove us to Joe's and parked in front. Mary got her shopping bag from the trunk, and we went into the house. Mary took Bem's suit from Andy with the promise to hang it up and went upstairs to her room. She shut the bedroom door behind her. A moment later, Mary wrenched the door open and called my name. "CHURCH!" She shouted, her voice coarse from the volume. "I need to see you up here, NOW!"
I hustled up the stairs and wondered what the problem could be. Mary beckoned me into her childhood room and slammed the door behind. "WHAT IS THIS?" She pointed at some leather and rubber goods strewn on her bed next to a black shopping bag.
Fear rattled my frame as I recognized some of the items. Even a brief glance allowed me to pick out a red ball gag, a riding crop, and a French tickler penis extender, among other things. I picked up the bag that was next to the items on the bed. The familiar `Domination Dominion' gas mask logo told me what happened. Mary had grabbed the wrong bag from the trunk.
"It's not mine." I said and immediately regretted my honesty.
"It was in the trunk of your car! Don't try to tell me it's not yours!" Mary was mad. She held herself tall and rigid, her fists clenched at her sides. She wasn't yelling, but only the lack of volume made it so. She was whispering emphatically, a shout-whisper. "I can deal with anything else you might be, even the type of deviant who would have these things, but I will not tolerate a liar!"
I tried to reduce the intensity of the situation by keeping my cool. I explained the items in a low, even tone of voice. "When we went to South Street, the day you were here with Zeke, Bem bought this stuff at the fetish shop. He went in there when the rest of us were doing other things. When I realized what he'd done, I brought the bags back to the car and tied the handles to keep Andy from seeing what was in them. I also told Bem not to discuss his purchases with anyone. Since then, the bags have been riding around in the trunk of the car because I didn't want to bring them in the house, and I didn't have any other place to put them."
"Bem bought these things?" Mary sank down to sit on the bed next to the sex toys. Her hands came to rest on a plastic blister pack that contained a bullet-shaped butt plug that was bigger around than my fist.
"Mary," I coaxed and started to lie to my sister, "he couldn't have been serious. Bem will go a long way to get a rise out of someone. He must have planned on using these things as gag gifts or to play practical jokes. There's nothing else they could be good for. Don't attach too much importance to it."
I knew from my days as an avid consumer of porn, that the massive plug that caught Mary's attention did have a use. I figured that it was quite possible that someone as sexually active as Bem would know someone who would be thrilled to accept it as a gift...or in any other way. I also knew that as conservative as Mary was, she likely wouldn't have that knowledge. I decided to focus on the outlandishness of the objects as a way to convince her.
Mary picked up the blister pack and hauled the plug into her lap. It looked even larger in contrast to her lean, small hands. "These things represent a level of perversion I don't understand. I don't think I'm OK with this."
Mary started to tear up and I got scared. I always thought that Mary could watch the world end without a single tear. Now she was starting to cry over the potential end of a day-old love affair. She raised her face to mine, the plug still clutched between her hands. "It was difficult knowing he had been with you, that he enjoyed...that. I don't think I can handle this. I really like him. Why didn't I pay attention to what I was grabbing from the car?"
The way Mary phrased her lamentation gave me an idea. It sounded to me like she wasn't as upset that Bem had the toys as she was that she knew about them. I assumed that if she could compartmentalize her knowledge, she'd be OK. I used the fact that Mary knew that Bem had sex with men as my guide.
The logic I used went like this: Mary wasn't too bothered by the broad idea that Bem liked sex with men. She was more bothered by the knowledge that I was one of the men Bem had engaged with. I assumed that Mary would be even more bothered if she knew the details of the acts. It seemed that, for Mary, the broad idea wasn't threatening, but the details were.
I pursued that idea and came up with some horseshit that I hoped Mary would buy. She was crying for the first time in my memory as I finished coming up with my plan and I knew I had to act fast. I gathered the stuff off the bed, pried the plug from her grasp, shoved everything into the shopping bag, and knotted the handles. I tucked the bag under my arm and told Mary what I was going to do with it. "I'm going to put this bag back in the car and bring your bag to you. Once I leave this room, this bag no longer exists, OK? Mary, it doesn't change who he is or how he makes you feel."
"It's not that simple." She moaned, her voice full of despair. "I know he has this inside him now and it scares me."
It took everything I had not to laugh at the way she phrased what she'd said. My brain overflowed with lewd remarks like, he'd certainly know if THAT was inside him.' I left them unuttered. I need to reason with her.' I thought.
"Mary." I got her attention but had no idea what I'd planned to do with it. I took a breath and scoured my brain for something to say. The discussion I'd had with Andy on the bench at the clothes store flashed in my head and provided the words that I needed. "Mary, people decide what they like in different ways. Some people only like women, some people only like men. Bem doesn't discriminate by gender. He likes specific people. He likes you. Mary...Mary, Bem likes you."
I made sure Mary heard me as I insisted to the truth that Bem liked her before I layered the lies into the explanation I was offering. "I don't think there's any part of Bem that's interested in the contents of this bag, but even if there is, it's not the part that enjoys your company, or the part that's good with the twins. Please, I liked how happy you were when we danced this morning. Don't destroy that because of a shopping bag full of jokes and impulse buys."
I waited for Mary's response. Her tears tapered off and she started to calm down. It seemed like, between my salesmanship and the act of getting the sex toys out of sight, I'd managed to reach her. "Are you OK?" I asked.
Mary wiped her face with her fingers and sniffed. "Yes, I'm fine. You're right. I guess I have to remember people are a lot of things. Bem is...complex. Besides, that stuff must've been a joke. I don't even know what some of those things are for."
I gave my sister a friendly hug. "That's the right decision. Bem is a good man, and it seems that he likes you very much. Now, you wait here, and I'll be right back."
I ran out to the car with the Domination Dominion bag clamped under my arm. I opened the trunk and shined my cell phone flashlight into its depths. I immediately saw what had happened. The trunk light didn't work, and the Domination Dominion bags had slid across the trunk floor to bury Mary's bag. She didn't realize there'd be other bags in there that were similar to hers. She'd reached into the dark and grabbed the first thing that felt like what she wanted and carried it inside.
That made sense to a point, but something wasn't right. Why,' I wondered, when she found the bag handles tied, didn't she realize the bag didn't belong to her?'
I checked Mary's bag and found the handles of it were also tied. I thought that was strange but didn't dwell on the strangeness. I wanted to get Mary's things to her quickly to give her less time to brood over what she'd seen from the first bag. I ignored the questions in my mind as I shut the trunk and headed up the walk.
The tied handles bothered me though. They bothered me enough that my curiosity got the best of my better judgement. I paused in the yellow light of the patio lamp to peek into Mary's bag. I had to look through a little gap at the base of the tied handles because she'd knotted the things so tightly. Try as I might, there was no way my thick fingers had the dexterity to loosen them without stretching out the plastic.
I squinted and shook the bag around to jostle the contents. The little bit that I could see looked like a mess of black lace. I felt a grin stretch my face, and I mentally congratulated my sister. I assumed that the conversation I'd had with her about the potential fun of complicated garments had inspired her to purchase some.
"Good for you, Mary." I said aloud to the bag of what I assumed was a bra and panties.
I finished my journey to my sister's bedroom door and knocked. It took everything I had to smooth the smirk off my face before Mary opened the door to me. When she answered, she was composed. "You alright now?" I asked as I handed her bag through the door.
"Yes, I am. You made me see things in the right light. Thanks." Mary said and even managed a small smile. "Now go away so I can get changed."
I left my sister to her task and went to catch up with my husband. As I retreated from my sister's bedroom door, I thought about the exchange we'd had. I assumed that Mary and I both knew that we were lying to each other. Mary wanted Bem enough to lie to herself and I wanted them to be happy enough to lie to her. `Whatever works.' I thought as I reached the main floor of the house.
I glanced around but didn't see Shawn or Joe anywhere. I knew that Shawn was close, I could sense that, but wasn't sure exactly where. While I was looking around the main floor of the house, Mary came down. She was red in the face again and her clothes were the same. At first, I assumed she'd decided not to change, then I remembered the contents of the bag I'd brought to her. I realized that it was likely Mary had changed.
I chuckled to myself, and I hoped that Bem would appreciate how daring Mary was trying to be. I crossed my fingers for luck and went back to looking for Shawn. When I didn't find him right away, I focused on the distance between me and him. That's when I realized he was outside. I had expected him to be in the house and that's why I'd been unable to find him. I went out and found Shawn and Joe in the back yard under a flood light.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
Joe waved a frantic hand in the air. He was trying to shoo away a moth that had found him interesting. "We're trying to see if I have any other powers."
Shawn explained before I could ask the obvious question. He used his clinical tone. "'The power of truth' won't be the only power Joe has. He seems to have a large capacity and should have other abilities. I'm thinking because the first of his powers to manifest was a version of mind control, Joe will gain more abilities along those lines. Some empaths can sense emotions or read thoughts, but I doubt Joe will be one of them. We came out here, so I didn't say anything embarrassing in front of an audience."
"Get anywhere?" I asked.
I got a negative head shake from both Joe and Shawn. Joe elaborated. "I've been thinking at Shawn, trying to get him to do little things, but no results."
"The problem is," Shawn explained, "every power is a little different in the way that it works. Typically, each style of magic is taught by a user of that type. Only they know exactly how their power works."
Joe, who'd been listening to Shawn and side-eying at me, directed a question my way. "Are you used to this stuff yet or do you still feel like you're living in a fantasy film?"
I rubbed my neck and dropped my hand to my bracelet. "Some of it's mundane. I accept it like I accept green grass and brown dirt and I don't really think about it. Other times, I look around in childlike wonder."
Joe rubbed his neck like I had. I wondered if our habitual neck rubs triggered each other like yawning in front of someone will make them yawn. "I've only seen a little of what you guys can do and I've been in that state continuously since you got here." Joe admitted, then he spoke to Shawn. "We've been at this for over an hour, and we don't seem to be any closer than when we started. Why don't we try again tomorrow?"
"Sure." Shawn nodded in agreement.
Joe went inside and left Shawn and I in the yard. "I have to tell you what happened." I said. I was bursting with the story of picking up Bem's suit and the unfortunate shopping bag mistake. I related the events of the last few hours while I watched Shawn alternately smile, shake his head, and laugh. When I finished, I asked his opinion.
"She's got it bad for him, doesn't she?" He asked in reference to Mary and Bem. "Are you worried?"
"Sure, I'm worried." I readily admitted. "I'm also a little selfishly sad. I'm not going to be OK with him jumping back in bed with us as long as he and Mary are together. I don't think Mary will be OK with it either."
"I didn't think of that." Shawn said as the thought struck him visibly. "That means we'll never get to use the suit you bought him!"
"We won't. I think Mary is planning to get some use out of it though. You should have seen the look on her face when he came out of the fitting room. It was the closest to speechless as I've ever seen her." I laughed.
Shawn and I chatted in the yard for a few minutes until Shawn stretched and yawned. "Time for bed?" I asked.
"Yes, it's been a big day."
I opened the sliding glass door and walked in first. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mary running up the stairs toward the bedrooms. No one else was around except Bem, who was sitting on the living room couch, staring at a dead television screen. He didn't look quite right, so I went to check on him. He didn't move or speak, even after I stood in front of him.
"What happened?" I asked. "Is something wrong?"
Bem's eyes focused as he glanced up at me. "Uh, Mary just showed me something. She showed me what she bought at the mall."
"What did she buy?" Shawn asked behind me.
"I don't know what it's called," Bem said and cocked his head like a confused dog, "but it's black lace and seems very complicated. It's...uh...it goes from her feet, all the way to her shoulders, the pieces do I mean. It's got all these straps and clips and it's all black lace. I've never seen anything like it."
I dropped my head into my open hand with a slap. I'd assumed Mary had bought some underwear. From what Bem said, it was far more than that. My brain conjured an unwelcome mental image of my sister in a black lace teddy. That image explained why Mary seemed embarrassed at the mall and why she'd talked so much about changing.
Shawn felt my discomfort, but as we weren't telepaths, he wasn't treated to my mental image. As such, he remained puzzled. "What's made of black lace?" He asked innocently.
I felt the heat pouring from my face as waves of mortification crashed over me. I gritted my teeth with the realization that I was going to have to explain. "She's wearing a teddy, which is a lace corset, bra, and panties, and probably stockings with garters, and any other accessories she could find. OK?"
Shawn replied with one syllable. "Oh."
"Well?" I demanded of Bem without dragging my head from my hand.
"Bye," Bem said, and he rocketed up the stairs to Mary's room. I watched as he knocked on the door. The door opened just wide enough for a hand to slip through the opening. The hand dragged Bem inside by the collar of his shirt.
"You know Shawn," I said to my palm, "earlier this week, I was seriously considering your 'big house for all of us' idea. It seemed really nice. Under the present circumstances, it seems like the worst idea you've ever had by a wide margin. We really need to go home."
"Come on." Shawn said. "It's time for bed." He grabbed the hand that wasn't supporting my face and led me to the stairs. "If we can't be home, at least we can be together."
A short time later, Shawn and I were next to each other, lying in the muted darkness of the soundproof bedroom. We didn't speak. We were enjoying the simple pleasure of being together. "Church." Shawn said after a long silence.
"Yeah."
"Do you want to do anything?" He asked, his voice devoid of passion or enticement.
"Not really. Is that OK? I'm feeling really overwhelmed and as much as I think of your body as a beautiful refuge, I just don't think I could tonight."
"Do you want to talk about anything?"
One of the greatest things about the emotional link I had with Shawn was that I never had to worry he was doing something, or not doing something, just to please me. I could tell he didn't mind not having sex that night and I could tell he really wanted me to tell him why I felt the way I was feeling. He loved me, and he worried about me, and he wanted me to be OK. It didn't matter that he was tired, or stressed, or worried about his own things. Shawn knew that I was upset, and he wanted to help. What's more, I knew that's what he really wanted.
I rolled onto my side to face Shawn, and I wished I could see him more clearly. The darkness of the room meant I could only tell his outline from the general gloom. I took a breath to tell him what was upsetting me, but when I allowed myself to focus on all the worries that had been piling up, it caused a dam of anxiety to burst inside me. A flood of the nasty stuff poured from me and washed over Shawn.
"Go ahead." Shawn prompted me when he felt the putrid wave of negative emotion.
"Fuck, Shawn. I know you tried to tell me to let people carry their own problems, but I'm struggling. Sometimes I feel really good. Andy and I had a moment this afternoon. We were listening to my old records, playing air instruments, and being silly. It was great. For that one moment, I had fun. The rest of the time, I want to scream and punch things. Joe won't make a decision about coming or staying. I gave him until Sunday, and until then I'm imagining the worst. Finding out how damaged he is, that was a big blow. I didn't know he was fucked up like I'm fucked up. He was always so normal. I knew I was fucked up, and I assumed Mary's fanaticism was her version of being fucked up, but I always thought Joe made it through intact. Christ!"
I took a breath to swallow the lump that had formed in my throat and plowed on with more anxiety. "Then there's this thing with Bem and Mary. And Zeke, my sister's loose cannon soon to be ex-husband...I still have to see him tomorrow to bring him that check. Andy's gay and he thinks his father is OK with it, but he's not. Finding out you knew how fucked up I am and that it's been worrying you. The only trouble-free people here are the twins."
"Shawn...fair fucking warning, if anything-else happens, I'm going to snap. You'll have to take me back to Solum in a straitjacket. I really want to do right by everyone, I want this to work out. Nothing I ever did here worked the way it was intended, if it worked at all. This is my second chance. My only chance. I need this, Shawn, but I'm afraid it's slipping away." My voice shook as I spoke. It broke when I didn't have any more to say. I wept hot, bitter tears.
Shawn gathered me in his arms. He pulled me to him and held me tightly as I cried. He didn't use any words. He didn't need to. He wrapped his comforting presence around me until I cried myself out. When I didn't have any tears left, I stayed in his warm safety and the comforting scent of his body until the weight of the day and the exhaustion of too much emotion submerged me in sleep.