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Golfing With Mike - Part 1
Sitting here tapping away at my keyboard I decide to start a diary. I am at a crossroad; having many regrets of chances for male love and companionship I am determined to rectify. Today I am wearing my peach minidress while I compose as it helps me get in better touch with my femininity. But I am not sure of my sexuality as a whole person. Some days I am Donnie; sexually charged and wanting to be the feminine creature that I know I can be. Some days I am Donnie, sexually charged and pursuing a more feminine creature than I am. But always I am Donnie not sure which world I can live in; looking for an opportunity which will show me that world.
I enjoy my golfing companions on a once a week outing. It is one of the most important part of my week; especially with this Covid Virus self-induced isolation. My companions are Phil, Ben, and Mike. We are older guys; all of us over 65.
Phil, the oldest, is around 80; our best golfer and a bit cantankerous quick to make a slightly stabbing remark about our golfing inabilities. But his remarks are always in fun and no one's feelings are hurt nor ego damaged.
Ben, I think is a little older than 70. He is very thin and might be younger than he looks. It is hard to tell with his grey hair and weathered face exactly what his age is. He is kind and has soft blue eyes. He is engaging and pleasant. Sometimes I think he is interested in knowing me better, but we have not had an opportunity for that. Even with his age he is sexy and if he pursued me, I would probably give him a gift that would make him think of me more. But presently, of the trio, it is Mike who I have the most interest.
I have known Mike for a long time. We worked together in the 1980s and use to hang out during lunch. Our company had endured a lot of layoffs so there was plenty of empty space around. Someone brought a ping pong table and we set it up in one of these empty spaces. At lunch, some of us would get together for a little competition. It was great fun and is when I first got to know Mike. During this period, I was not interested in having a relationship outside of my marriage, so I was not thinking of Mike in that way. But I did enjoy his company and could not help to notice his rugged good looks. He reminded me of a young Pat Boone with those blue eyes and nice wide smile.
But these days I have been on the prowl and Mike is in my headlights. Even at 65 he is handsome and fit. I love it when I can touch his hands which are thick, hard, with strong fingers. I have been dropping subtle hints letting him know he interests me but am careful not to go too far. Mike will need to reciprocate.
Like I said we knew each other in the 1980s. We had not seen each other in years. At a party for members of our Sunday School class, a couple of years ago, we ran into each other each recognizing the other immediately. Alice and I had just started going to this Church and were new to the class. Mike and his wife had been out of town and had not been attending Church, so this is the first time we had the opportunity to renew our friendship.
He grabbed my hand and pulled me in for a hug as we left the party. It was a brotherly love sort of hug; not having any sexual overtones but I did enjoy the short meeting of our bodies. I was glad to see him and he was glad to see me and our wives seemed happy we had reacquainted as neither of us had any really close friendships.
After a time, I learned that Mike lived in a golfing community. I am a poor golfer but really enjoy playing and asked him if we could play sometime. This led to our weekly golf outing which we have now. We had played with different combinations of people, but I am only interested in playing when Mike is there.
On the golf course you learn a lot about people. Are they patient? Are they humble? Are they consistent with their feelings and values? Mike scored high in all these areas.
After we are done playing, Mike likes to stop at the grill and have a small lunch. Mostly he likes the conversation and companionship. I do too. He is attentive and likes to get things for me, just small things like a napkin or a plastic fork some ketchup. Just little things. Sometimes I feel he would like to pull my chair out for me as I sit down. When I speak to him, he really pays attention and makes it easy for conversation. A sweet man.
I would gladly be intimate with him but do not know how to bridge that conversation. I have tried to drop hints, but I do not want to be too bold. He has strong Christian beliefs and I am afraid he might be angry if he knew I had homosexual feelings for him. But sometimes; he is so attentive I think there might be a chance. And this Covid Virus makes it even harder. Mike has been taking chemo and must be double careful about the virus so there is absolutely no touching or those friendly hugs. Sometimes I want to brush my hand nonchalantly across his knee to see a reaction. This is impossible to do. I do take peeks at his package and sometimes I think it has grown a bit. I wonder if he is thinking about me. This drives me mad for him; I wonder if the chemo will make his cum taste bad. I could suck his cock and there would be no chance of transmission of the virus for him if we soaped up well afterwards. I am not afraid of getting the virus from him as he is so careful. I think he might be delicious.
July 28, 2020
I managed to get an early tee time of 8:10. I wanted to get an early time with rain predicted every day. Usually rain does not start till late morning or early afternoon so I thought we would have a good chance of a dry round.
As usual we are playing 9 holes. It is so hot this time of year it is probably a good idea that we only play 9. But I kind of wish we would play 18. Mike is on chemo so it would exhaust him to play 18; he always says he is getting tired by the time we reach the last couple of holes. I don't want to wear my buddy out; it is good that he is able to even play 9.
On the drive over I was thinking what I could say or do to drop a little hint or get in a conversation that might include homosexuality or how older guys don't get sex with their wives as often as they might like. Just a little something to let us open up. I did not have any good ideas and hoped something might pop up when we had our lunch at the grille.
I was the first to arrive at the club house. While I was stretching out Mike walked up, "you got here early."
"Yeah, I like to get a chance to stretch out a bit and take a few putts," I replied.
I bent down pretending to pick up a ball, but I was really trying to get a little peek at his crotch. I was a little disappointed that the shorts he was wearing did not show his package well.
Mike said, "The starter said we can be the next group to tee off."
"What about Ben and Phil?"
"They are already here. Saw them in the parking lot."
"Great!"
We got to the tee and I had to use my mulligan on my first tee shot; fortunately, my next ball went right down the center of the fairway. I struggled with my game the first 3 holes, but I got it together after that. Poor Mike was really having trouble; I think he feels worse than he lets on.
We were having an enjoyable morning. The temperature was in the low 80s.It was muggy at first but later the wind picked up and it was really nice.
I noticed clouds moving in on the 7th hole and when we tee'd off on the 9th ;it started to rain. And then it started to pour. We headed back to the club house. By the time I got there I was soaked. Mike hollered at me, "I am skipping lunch today; I am soaking wet and need to get home to change."
I was deflated but expected it. Even though I was anxious to spend some alone time with Mike I did not relish sitting in an air conditioned room with soaking wet clothes. Then Mike, thoughtful as usual, "Come over to the house; you are soaked. I can get you some dry clothes and we will toss those in the dryer. Teresa is out with friends today so we can hang out."
Probably a little too exuberantly, "Wow, that sounds really great!"
I followed Mike over to his place. I had only been there once before and was not sure how to get there. He lived really close to the club house; it only took a couple of minutes to get there.
Mike opened the garage and signaled me to follow him in through the garage. He closed the garage door.
"We better not drip wet clothes on the floor inside. It would be best if we undressed here and went inside to get dry clothes." He looked at me with those sparkling blue eyes and toothy smile.
I felt faint. My dream comes true. I could not believe this moment was happening. So quickly, but how else. When the time is right, our passion boiling, it should move naturally one thing leading to the next. We undressed facing each other; I wanted to savor each moment and show myself totally without hesitation. My clothes are cold and wet; my penis flaccid; even more than that my cock is pulled in to capture the heat of my body. I am happy it lies in this state; I want my lover to see me relaxed in the beginning and watch it grow as my passion grows. As I remove my last piece of clothing I stood before him showing all; letting him know it is all available for his pleasure. Take me with your staff darling, I thought to myself. Visions of events soon to come dancing in my mind.
I am staring at Mike as he removes his last pieces of clothing. He had removed all but his shirt. His body stretching as he struggled to remove his wet shirt. His cock also in a relaxed state but not hiding from the wet coolness. In its relaxed state it is larger than mine. It hangs framed by a full nut sack. His balls are full; I imagine he must have a large supply of cum and will fill me fully when his seed escapes into my mouth. He would be the alpha; I feel that I will be is subservient bitch. His bottom. A mere plaything there to serve his desires. My heart is racing and my breath increasing pace. His shirt on the floor and he is so close. Should I go to him? Should he take charge? The moment is charged, and time has slowed down to a crawl waiting for him to capture me.
"Come on in. I will get us some clothes." He said this suddenly and moved towards the door leading to his living area.
Have I disappointed him? I was ready for him to grab me and pull me into embrace and touch our bodies to one another.
"Grab a towel and wait here. I'll grab some clothes." He said with his friendly smile. Then he turned around and walked down to his bedroom.
Should I follow? He was not being clear. Have I misread his attentions? Surely not.
I stood naked in the middle of the living room. Confused and stunned I did not know what to do next. I decided to relax on the couch and await his return. I stretched across the couch leaning back with one leg on the couch and my other leg's foot touching the floor. Legs slightly spread so when he returned, he would see me relaxed, exposed and ready for him. I waited and waited. It seemed like a long time, but it was only a couple of minutes. Finally, he returned. Seeing me on the couch, "I thought I told you to grab a towel to dry yourself."
"I did not see a towel," I stuttered unsure of the situation and feeling vulnerable and a little embarrassed. I was beginning to realize Mike had no interest in me sexually. I had generated a scenario in my head that was pure fantasy. Mike looked at me oddly realizing my uneasiness.
"Gosh, I am so sorry. I thought you saw the towel folded up on the table. I am a terrible host." With that said, Mike, moved quickly over to grab the towel and commanded me to stand up. I stood before him naked confused and embarrassed. Mike moved towards me with the towel and began drying me off.
"I am so sorry, you must have been freezing out here," he said as he busily rubbed the towel on my head drying my hair. I stood there and let him work on me; still too stunned to say anything or move.
It would have seemed odd for anyone but Mike to start drying me but knowing him I could understand why. Mike was an EMT for many years and it is his nature to take charge of a situation. He had seen and done so many things in all sorts of situations it would not seem at all odd for him to take care of me.
He continued to dry me off. My hair and face dry he continued to my chest and back; even lifting my arms to dry my hairless pits. Then my crotch, ass between my thighs. He was unintentionally stimulating me, and my cock was hardening from his work. I was trying to subdue my hardening cock by trying to think of something else, but it was to no avail. Especially with him on his knees drying my legs and the top of his head just inches below my hardening cock. I tried to hide it but when he stood up it was right there in its full glory. Mike saw it and with a smile, "Sorry I guess I rubbed to hard. Don't be embarrassed. Really, don't be. This happens all the time. An EMT sees many things; it is natural so please don't be embarrassed."
Mike, such a gentleman. I was relieved. I thought I had totally blown our friendship. I a bit baffled with how events have transpired and disappointed for sure. I thought I would be on my knees and sucking the cock of my dear friend by now. I could not have predicted this turn of events. I wish I could kiss this darling man.
Mike tossed me some clothes and went out to the garage to gather the wet ones. As he walked in to toss the clothes in the dryer, he held up my black cotton bikini undies. He held them up and smiled, "These are cute."
I was so glad I had not worn my pink silk panties that I first considered this morning. The silk panties do not work well when you are getting all sweaty. I am really glad I had not worn those; this morning's events had been strange enough.
Mike got us both coffee and sat in the couch close to me. He is such a touchy-feely guy and is not at all shy. One of the things I find attractive about him. We sipped our coffee as the dryer did its work.
"Could I ask you something?" Mike asked.
"Sure, I guess anything is up for discussion after you dried off my balls," I blurted out. Why did I say that? Idiot!
Mike just laughed it off. "I suppose we are better friends now." He winked. "You have very little hair on your body. Is it medicine you take? When I am on chemo I lose a lot of hair but I am not even close to as smooth as you."
"I have always been like this. I do not know why. I think I would be uncomfortable to be really hairy. Does it bother you?
"No, I guess I am used to it. I guess you get use to things and not think about it. You seem to think about it. Have you always shaved your genitals?"
This is a crack in the conversation that I did not dream of. "Alice and I have stopped having sexual relations for several years. I think I did it to help me cope with that. It seems to help me. It is hard to explain."
Mike changed the conversation quickly. What I said struck a chord. His eyes gazed down at my crotch for a moment and then he quickly looked away.
We spent the morning chatting about financial woes at our church and our friend Jim. Jim was in the hospital with the Corona Virus. He is in serious condition and we are both concerned for him.
I decided it was time to leave. The conversation was losing its luster and I did not want to be a bore. I wanted to have another opportunity to come to Mike's house.
The drive home seemed long as I pondered the morning's twist and turns.