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In This Cruel World
Benji narrates
A little past seven in the morning Brennan picks Duncan and me up from the train station. Our equipment is identical right down to size so when I'm getting dropped off I grab his hockey bag instead of mine on purpose. If he wore my worn boxers and he wears Adam's maybe he'll like this. When he empties it to dry and air everything out he'll catch on.
As I set aside what gets washed and toss the rest on my drying rack I also take a good whiff of his stuff. Both of his undershirts are a bouquet of fragrance. After eight games in five days the armpits are especially strong. But what the fuck am I doing this for? I switched bags for his benefit, not mine. Sort of an olive branch if he asks, and my deceptive way of trying to win him back from Adam if I'm honest. I almost walk away before curiosity gets the better of me. When I give him head sometimes his balls sit in my nose and I get a whiff behind them. That intoxicating scent is on his hockey undershorts. I swipe it from the wash pile, slip the cup back in and secret it under my pillow for bedtime.
I spend the day with Katy and my parents but my head just isn't ever into where I am or what I am doing. Around six-thirty I get a call from a couple of our friends. Peter asks to talk with Duncan for a sec. He assumes that Duncan is with me because apparently his parents think he went to play guitar. Nope, I know for a fact that Duncan's bass and mini-amp are in my basement because I am staring at them. So not only is Duncan lying to his parents, but he's using the band as a cover while he gets intimate with Adam and probably celebrating New Year's Eve a few hours early. I almost blow Peter off but he and Etienne are overly concerned that Duncan isn't answering his cell phone.
Katy and I both try Duncan's phone, and then Katy calls Yvonne to see if he's with her. I know the answer but I let her call anyway. I convince Katy to go over to our friend Ian's house without me and I'll catch her there later. We're all supposed to head over there tonight for New Year's Eve, but I want to talk with Duncan before I go.
I'm sure I know where he is so I head over to his complex. I can't remember if Adam lives in the same building as him, but they are 4 towers all connected with a nice little promenade and I can check the buzzer listings in the building lobbies for Adam. Yes, the modern urban complex borders on futuristic where you'll never have to step outside into the world beyond your own steel and concrete jungle.
When I get there I find Adam's condo is in the second tower I check. I try buzzing up repeatedly but there is no answer. Finally I leave a message as it turns over to his family's voicemail to please call my cell when he gets the message.
Walking back into the near empty promenade I consider shooting up to Duncan's condo and getting Brennan to help if he's home. Knowing I am almost in a panic I park my duff on a bench for a minute to think things through. It dawns on me that I'm the only one over reacting here. Peter wasn't so much concerned as to where Duncan has been, or Etienne, they were just wondering why he wasn't answering his phone. Katy wasn't concerned in the slightest and Yvonne was unaffected. I'm the one that has turned this into something worrisome because I am feeling cut out of my best friend's life.
I'm contemplating the reasons I should get my head checked when his ringtone snaps me out of my extreme concentration.
"Benji? Where are you," he asks.
"Over at your place trying to find you. I figured I'd check and see if you were with Adam? Where are you," I ask in turn.
"Wow. Jealous much? Nevermind. Ima take that one back. He's gone to Whistler for the week. Jase and I were just strumming at his place. I turned off my ringer and what a mistake. Like twenty missed calls and eight of them are you. My mailbox is full of where are you's and call me's! Where's the fire? Hang on, I might lose you, the elevator's here," he says.
"Yeah, Peter was worried that you were missing," I say.
Jase lives in the same complex as Duncan, in the same tower as Adam actually. When I get no response other than dead air I head over to the elevators in that lobby and run into Duncan as he exits it into the mall.
"And there you are," Duncan says, giving me a curious look.
Suddenly I think he actually was with Adam and called me after I left a message at Adam's. Then I click on the guitar case in his hand, "Whacha got there?"
"Jase found this at a flea market for fifty bucks, talked the guy down to fourty. It's left handed and you gotta hear it Benji! It's really strong and bold! If it wasn't upside down for him Jase would keep it for himself," Duncan enthuses.
I feel stupid, "So that's it? You turned your ringer off so you guys could jam and I'm worked up over nothing?"
"No. You're not worked up over nothing. But I don't know what to do about it. You want to fuck Katy's brains out, I want to fuck your brains out. I found an outlet. Plus Adam's really sweet. And we're not boyfriends. He has a guy he's in love with but I'm a practice partner for him too, so it works. That just leaves you `n me in a spot," Duncan says, biting his lip nervously.
Adam really is the first secret Duncan has ever kept from me. Not birthday or Christmas gifts, not his fantasies, not even his love for me. He lets it all fly for my sake. Then again I'm the one that been keeping a secret or two, as much from myself as him. First is that I love him. Really love, as in spend the rest of my days with him love. Second is that is that I know he and Adam were probably screwing around behind my back since Duncan tried picking him up in the locker room and at McDonalds with me right there. I've never seen him be such a little flirt and hell yes, I was jealous because he is quite the charmer too!
I follow him up to his condo, "You're quiet Benji. That's not good. We'll talk, but I hafta grab a shower and get my ass moving if we're getting to Ian's by eight. Can you toss something into the nuker for me if there are any pizza pockets or whatever? And seriously, I was with Jase and I only checked my messages when I was getting ready to leave. You can call him but you won't 'cause you know I'm not lying. I love you too much to."
He kisses me before he opens the door to his place. My boy is all business, stripping down to his boxers in front of his parents and Brennan and Brennan's girlfriend Jen while explaining where he was. His parents just assumed he was with me, because he never told them anything. Standing by the door still I get a view of his ass as he drops his boxers in the hallway, as does Brennan who is on the right side of the couch for a good view.
Brennan looks at me so I make a face, "Hey, he's your brother by blood. Not my fault he can't shock me. Ima go make him some food, we're late for Ian's."
The only thing on the whole Adam subject that comes up as we walk over to Ian's is another apology from Duncan, "I shouldn't say this because it isn't fair to you...but if there ever was the slightest chance you would consider sex with me I'd kick Adam to the curb so fast. But like I said, that's not fair to you. If we can still mess around I'll ditch him too. You taste a hundred times sweeter than him."
I don't know just what I want lately so I brush it off coolly. I lick a string of cheese off his chin as we walk through the snowbank lined sidewalk and kiss him, "You can have both I guess."
He feels my crotch and thanks me. I guess this is the point that I should give him a speech, about how now the he has found a gay guy to have sex with that he doesn't need me anymore and our days of experimenting are done. I mean with the mixed emotions I have inside that's basically how it's going to have to be or else I just might end up marrying him someday. And his lack of boobs will eventually bore me; it won't be a good scene. I badly need to stop this phase and let him move on. My baby bird has spread his wings and learned how to fly. Only I can't bring myself to say it. A petty part of me doesn't want to give up the love he's lavished on me or the smokin' hot blowjobs he's become so expert at. Heck, I'd even miss him tickling my hairless hole while he savours my swollen member in his mouth and throat.
I settle myself by focusing on the prize I swiped from him that is waiting for me at home. Thank god Katy and I didn't mess around on my bed as hockey shorts with Duncan's No. 12 written on them stashed under my pillow would be about as hard to explain as having my own No. 21 hockey shorts under my pillow!
The prize waiting in my bed proves to be worth the wait when I finally get to bed. I was hoping to take Duncan to my bed tonight but his parents insist that he go home tonight as do mine seeing as we've been away for six days. I slide into bed, take a whiff of his shorts and slip into them adjusting myself in his cup. I grind my pelvis into my mattress and mounded up duvet. I am so hard it hurts. I jerk off with the shorts over my face and have an explosive climax. I must have had more blood flooding my nether region than normal because I promptly fall asleep. When I wake a few minutes later I wipe myself off and dress in his shorts again and tie the lace tight. It's identical to mine but I feel so sexy looking down my body at the bulging cup in my crotch that caresses Duncan. I repeat this a couple times throughout the night and again every night until our next practice.
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After my dad drops us off at hockey practice the next week he comments, "Uh, did you take the wrong bag last time?"
"Nope," I answer.
"Well I ended up with yours. Didn't you dump out your bag?"
"Yeah I did. I thought maybe you'd like my stuff. Did you," I ask.
"Nah, never once got a chance with everyone home," he candidly admits.
I look around us to see if anyone is looking or listening. The coast is clear so I cup his crotch, "I slept is your shorts every night. They are little ripe now, but fuckin hot!"
"Nice," Duncan says, "I on the other hand washed everything for you."
"Correction, your mom did," I point out.
"Same diff. But we're switching bags, Ima wear my stuff. You figure how you're getting my jock in your bag. Presently I'm wearing yours," Duncan states with a wide smile and raps his knuckles on the cup for emphasis.
The bugger had me aced. While we were undressing he casually put his on the bench so that I could pick it up casually and no one would know. The hard part for him was no one noticing he came already wearing mine. I mean my number 21 written on the white nameplate is obviously not his, and vice versa.
After practice we both figure to spend time getting busy with each other. Ryan and Zach have other ideas and invite themselves over to my place. Jase and Sasha show up half an hour after us and we have a great afternoon working over a few songs.
Duncan leaves early to spend the afternoon with his faux-girlfriend at the movies with Richard and Etienne. After the movie and dinner at his place Duncan comes back over to my house and we finally get our time together.
"How was the movie," I ask.
"It was alright. Richard and Etienne act more like a couple than Yvonne and I. We talked about it," he says sourly. The irony in his statement is that Richard and Etienne are only friends.
"Really," I start to ask, wondering what Yvonne had to say but he cuts me off by grabbing my crotch and locking our lips together.
Duncan strips his shirt off porn-star style and flings it. He pushes me on my bed and straddles me and we start making out like crazy. I love his body on mine, when he's making me feel good. Piece by piece Duncan takes care of getting us undressed. When he gets to my belly button he starts going mental on it. I have a slight innie and it is so sensitive. My dick is straining and I'm able to tense up my muscles so that I can bounce my cock off his neck like a slow, steady drumbeat.
When he gets me down to my boxers he suggests, "So you liked my jock? Can you go get it? Your's too?"
I do as he asks. While I'm getting them from my basement he wakes up my computer and has a classic electronica song playing from my WinAmp folders, Major Tom by Peter Schilling and Bomm-Bastic.
Duncan takes his and puts it on and starts going to town on my softened cock. I turn him around so that we are basically in a 69 position and his crotch is above my face. I am intoxicated. Duncan licks a finger and starts wiggling it around my back entry. I almost don't mind it as I am really into the oral I am getting with the added stimulus in my nostrils. He starts to penetrate me with his finger and the feeling is awful. It's pain and discomfort and I don't care for it at all so I swat his hand away. Feeling my orgasm nearing I thrust my hips up and unload into Duncan's throat.
Duncan grabs my hockey shorts and starts dressing me in them. I lift my hips so that he can slide the waist over my hips and help position myself inside the cup until it is comfortable. He ties the drawstring an then starts fondling me. After pawing me he slips his down his thighs and steps out of it. With the cup to his face he sits his butt down on mine and grinds back and forth while furiously jerking his meat. He's so aggressive I'm worried he's going to rip it off when it he volleys a shot on my face. A few more shots shoot all over my chest and pool by my belly button.
He licks up every drop and repeatedly shares it with me. After we're done he dons his shorts again and we cuddle until we fall asleep. In the morning he dresses in my discarded boxers and I dress in his. The sight of me in his starfish boxers is too much and he gives me another exceptional blowjob through the open fly. For his turn he takes my boxers off and breathes through them. With his free hand he slips a couple fingers inside himself. If anyone in the house is listening, his muffled grunts are unmistakable. When he's close he pulls out of my mouth and has me lay on my stomach. He pulls the boxers just below my cheeks and masturbates himself until he is depositing everything in my crack. Only he's not satisfied with owning me that way, he licks me clean over and over from one end to the other, going slower over my hole every time until we both know just how relaxed it is becoming. I can't say I like the feeling, and I'm actually concerned that my hole is reacting the way it is, but it feels good. Real damn good actually.
[to be continued]