Love Is Where You Find It Chapter Eleven
John threw me roughly on the bed. He laid me on my back and ripped my shorts off.
"Nice," he said as he viewed my hard cock. Clint's a little on the small size."
He began to disrobe quickly. He was not wearing any underwear and soon his massive, erect cock came into view. I had forgotten how big it was and my mouth began to water in my desire to devour it. John straddled my body and crept up until his balls were tickling my chin. He aimed his cock at me and brushed my lips with his cock head.
"Take it," he said. "I know how good you are. I taught you."
I wanted it so badly. My mouth began to open without my willing it. I grabbed his cock and started moving it toward my waiting mouth. Suddenly I turned over knocking him off me.
"No," I yelled, "I can't do this. I can't cheat on Brad."
"I know you want it," John purred. Besides nobody will ever know."
"I'll know," I sobbed. "I'll know. Please Carl (I called him Carl) get out of here and leave me alone."
"No," he said, "I won't go. I know you want it as much as I do." He grabbed me and turned me on my stomach. He was so much stronger than I am that I couldn't wriggle away from him. He pinned me down so tightly, I could hardly breathe. And then I felt it. His cock was at my crack. He was going to enter me and I was helpless. He was going in dry and I was scared.
I screamed in pain as his oversized cock invaded me. He didn't wait for me to get used to him and he started pumping immediately. The pain was more than I could bear and I passed out.
When I awoke, I was alone. I was struck by how quiet the house was. The bedroom lights were on and I could see the clock on Brad's night table. It was 2 AM. I had to get up for work in two and a half hours. I wanted to move but I couldn't. I felt something sticky cementing me to the bed. I reached down and put some of the sticky substance on my finger tips. I looked at my fingers and they were covered with coagulating blood. I was lying in a pool of blood and in excruciating pain.
With the greatest effort I have ever exerted, I crawled up my bed until I could reach the telephone on my night stand. I punched in my dads' number. Their phone rang several times, but eventually Larry answered and I knew that I had awakened him. I could tell that he wasn't quite sure yet where he was.
"Who is it?" he asked. He was obviously still too much asleep to read his caller ID.
I tried to talk and didn't realize how difficult it would be. Exerting even more effort I said, "I need you." It was all I could mutter because I passed out again. I didn't realize it at the time but I was bleeding to death.
I thought I was back in Ft. Lauderdale after the bus accident. I was certain that I was in a hospital as I slipped in and out of consciousness. This time I was vaguely aware that I was in a private room. I don't remember any doctors or nurses attending to me. Did my loved ones come around? I didn't know.
I became aware of reality early Friday morning. I could see that I was receiving a blood transfusion and a saline IV. Damn it, I had a catheter in me. A beautiful young nurse came into the room. When she saw I was awake, she smiled broadly at me. Both her cheeks became dimpled. I knew that if I was straight, I'd be instantly in love with her.
"Well, if it isn't sleeping beauty," she said. "Your visitors start coming around after work in the late afternoon. Until then you'll have to put up with me. Now," she said, "I need to bathe you so you'll have to help me."
This was my third serious hospital visit in a little over two years. I knew the routines well. I couldn't help but wonder if this was to be my life, being a patient in a hospital every few months. This time, however, I was wracked with guilt. This time it was entirely my fault. I had led John to believe he could have me. He was too far gone in rapture to obey my wish to stop.
I let the nurse do what she had to do but I was in a robotic state. I could hardly understand the doctor when he told me that my colon had been ripped and he had to stitch me up. The stitches would dissolve in a few days and they were healing nicely.
At about noon, Chuck came in. He had no classes that afternoon and he rushed right over. The first thing he did was to call Larry and tell him that I was awake. I started to cry and asked him if Brad knew.
"No, we didn't tell him. We just told him that you didn't want to divert his attention one iota from his exams, and that you wouldn't talk to him until after the last exam. The last exam ended at noon so he'll be calling you soon. Here's your cell phone." He laid it on the cabinet beside my bed just as it rang.
"Hi honey," I heard Brad's cheery voice. I need to stop at the office and then I'll go straight home. Do you think you can get away a little earlier today?"
"How did it go?" I asked.
"Are you OK? I can hardly hear you."
I tried to speak up. "Yes, I'm fine. You didn't answer me. How did it go?"
"I'm pretty confident about things. I'll tell you all about it later. I love you."
"I love you too."
"Don't worry," Chuck said. "Jamie and Jim are going to tell him about your rape and send him to the hospital. Larry and I cleaned up the bloody sheets and put fresh linen on your bed so he won't have to see that."
I started to cry. "Oh Pop, it's entirely my fault. I should never have let him in the house."
"It was not your fault. Don't ever think that. Carl or John or whoever, was never any good. You forgave him once too often. That's the only thing you are guilty of. It's Clint I feel bad for. John has taken off and nobody knows where he is. If you press charges, he'll be wanted by the police and that's a whole other ball game."
"I won't," I said. "He'll only say that I encouraged him and there's a little truth in that." I began crying again and Pop cradled me in his arms.
"I've got to pee," I said. That surprised me because I had a catheter. I looked down and saw that the catheter was gone. The doctor had removed it and I hadn't been aware of it. There was a urinal on my bed stand and Pop handed it to me.
"I wonder if I can go to the bath room."
"Let me ask the nurse," Pop said. He was back in a jiffy with the cute nurse. They both got me out of bed and I had no trouble walking to the bath room.
"If you need to do the other," she said, "don't be afraid. We gave you stool softeners with your meds." I was glad to hear that.
I realized that I was feeling pretty good. I had no pain. There wasn't any bleeding, and they had stopped my transfusions. I really wanted to go home. The only fear I had was facing Brad.
Sometime in the mid afternoon, the doctor came in to tell me that he had written orders to discharge me the next morning. He also advised me, that given the circumstances, I should be tested for HIV in about two weeks. I was ecstatic about going home, but filled with fear at the same time. What if Brad wanted to kick me out? I had acted badly enough. I wouldn't blame him.
Before long, Brad came rushing into my room. He was crying as he took me into his arms and cradled me against his chest.
"I swear, I'll kill that bastard. I'll kill him. How many times can he destroy your life? I'll never let him near you again. It's my fault. I didn't want you to meet him at the restaurant and I let you do it. How could I have been so dumb?"
That was odd. Brad was blaming himself and I was blaming myself. I had to say something.
"Stop it Brad. It's nobody's fault. He's no good and I was too willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. The doctor says I'll be fine. It's Reverend Clint we should be concerned about. He won't be back from his retreat until tonight.
Brad knew nothing about the retreat so Pop and I filled him in. Just then Larry came into the room and he was crying like a baby. "This crying has got to stop," I said. "The Pacific Ocean is rising and San Francisco is in danger of flooding." That lightened the mood and got us all laughing.
"I left a message on Clint's home phone for him to call me as soon as he gets home. He doesn't know anything about this yet," Dad said. Then he looked at me. "Aaron," he said, I want Clint to tell us what he knows about Carl's HIV status. It seems everyone was reverting to calling the rapist, Carl. The name John was reserved for the good guy.
I really was not very sick at this point so we all went into the visitor's lounge at the end of the hallway. The four of us could sit comfortably there and talk.
"I want to hear all about the exams," I said to Brad. "I won't let you put it off any longer."
"All I'm going to say is I think I passed all the sections, but I don't want ever to talk about it again until I get the official results.
Pop asked, "What do you say I go out and get Chinese food for dinner? We can eat it here and Aaron won't have to eat the hospital garbage." We all thought it was a great idea, and our dads left us to get the food.
The minute they were gone, I confessed to Brad that I had almost weakened, and that for a brief moment, I wanted to have sex with Carl. When I got my senses back, he wouldn't stop, and I wasn't strong enough to stop him, so he raped me. I shut my eyes expecting Brad to berate me. Instead he took me in his arms and held me tight.
"That's why I'll never let him near you again," Brad said. "He's like the serpent in the Garden of Eden and you're like Eve. Every time he appears, he tempts you into evil. I know it's a spell he has over you. I can't fight the spell, but I can keep him away from you so that he can't cast his evil spell on you, ever again. You fought him this time and it cost you dearly. In some ways I almost wish you had not resisted him. He might not have hurt you then."
"We don't know that," I answered. "I'm glad I said, no!"
Just then someone came into the lounge and turned on the television. The evening news was on and I for one paid no attention until I heard Brad yell, "Holy shit!!!" The other guy in the room and I turned our attention to the television. In a small town about one hundred miles south of San Francisco, a young man had attempted to rob a convenience store. His face was clearly visible in the surveillance tapes. It was John Smith.
One of the customers in the store was an off duty cop. He pulled his gun and John surrendered immediately. The gun he was using for the robbery was only a toy. As soon as the police officer replaced the gun in his holster and attempted to handcuff the perpetrator, he made a run for it. The policeman retrieved his gun, ran after the criminal and shot him once in the arm and once in the leg. Ironically it was the same two limbs Carl had broken in the bus accident.
Brad and I were speechless. "I guess we can count on his being put away for a few years. A good looking guy like him should get plenty of action in jail," Brad observed. "Good riddance is all I can say."
I was still speechless. When our dads returned, we told them what we had just seen, and Dad commented that when Clint called, it was going to be harder and harder to tell him everything.
The aroma in the lounge was wonderful. I had only been fed by IV for almost three days so I dove into the food. There was so much food that Pop asked the other guy in the room if he'd like some, and he gladly accepted. We were having a joyous evening. Jim and Jamie stopped by on their way home to wish me well, but they only stayed a few moments. By the time our dads were ready to leave, they had still not heard from Clint.
Brad refused to leave me, and talked the night nurse into letting him camp out on a chair. I begged him to go home but he wouldn't hear of it. Just about midnight, I felt someone take my hand. At first I thought it was Brad, but I could see him snoozing in the chair.
The presence was aware of my disorientation and said, "Aaron, it's me, Clint."
That woke me fully and rather quickly. I sat up in bed and we embraced. It was funny. We both said the same thing at the same time. "I'm so sorry!"
"I guess he fooled me," Clint said. "And I guess he fooled you a lot of times. He was so sincere about repenting, about finding God, about loving me."
"Don't be so hard on yourself," I said. "I've known from the start that the only one Carl loves is Carl. Still I let him use me every time and prayed that I could get him to love me. I'm the dumb one. He fooled me three times."
"Tomorrow I'm going down to the hospital where they're holding him. He'll need help," Clint said.
"Are you insane?" Brad yelled at the Reverend. "He'll beguile you again, just as he's beguiled Aaron over and over again. I beg you to let him be and write him out of your life."
"I know you mean well and your advice is heartfelt and sincere, but he's a human being in trouble. I can't just abandon him. All I can do is to keep him from enchanting me again."
I could hear Brad sigh loudly. "I have failed in keeping him away from Aaron. Why should I expect that I could deter you, Reverend Clint?"
"You can't," Clint said. "Aaron, I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am before I leave. Brad, take good care of Aaron." He left abruptly. As soon as he left, Brad stripped to his shorts and joined me in bed. Now we could both fall asleep peacefully.
I healed quickly, and our routine life resumed except for one thing. Even though I was fully healed, and the doctor gave me the go ahead, I would not let Brad fuck me. God knows I wanted him to, but I cringed at the thought. Besides that, even though Carl had assured me that he was HIV negative, I wanted to wait for a test. Thank God, I was negative.
Eventually Brad came up with a solution. He would insert one well lubed finger up my ass for as many nights as it took. He would try to stroke my prostate and get me excited there again. When I was comfortable with that, he would use two fingers. Little by little he would increase the number of fingers until his cock was no bigger than what he had in me.
In less than a week, his fingers were massaging my prostate to the point where I actually had an orgasm. After that, I said to Brad, "I think I'm ready." The very next time we made love, Brad fucked me. He was gentle, slow and very careful not to hurt me. I tried to wipe out the vision of Carl's rape, and soon having Brad inside of me brought back all the old joy I used to feel.
Brad had fucked me from the rear. When he was finished he lay on top of me. I think he was afraid to move. "I'm fine," I assured him, "and have I told you how much I love you."
"You might have," he said, "but I could hear it over and over again."
The first Sunday after I got out of the hospital, we did not go to church. I was still weak and healing. The next Sunday, we did attend services and stayed afterwards to speak to Clint. Obviously we wanted to know how things went with Carl.
"At first he wouldn't look at me," Clint said, "but after awhile, he started to sob. He told me how sorry he was. He didn't know what had come over him, and it would never happen again. He grabbed my hand and begged me to speak to the court to have him remanded into my custody for a probationary period. He was so convincing that I thought that might be a good idea. I told him that I would try.
"I went down to the local police station and found the cop who had shot him. I asked about the possibility of having him transferred into my custody since it was a first offense. The policeman laughed at me. He had pulled his record under his real name in San Francisco and Ft. Lauderdale. He had a long docket of arrests in Florida for drugs, robberies, assaults, and batteries.
"In San Francisco, He was arrested twice on drug charges under the name Carl Gilmore and several times under the name John Smith. The dates of the John Smith arrests spanned the time I was counseling him. He was as big a con artist, Aaron, as Brad has been telling you all this time.
"I walked out of the police station and out of his life. I hope he does go to jail. It's the only chance he'll get to become clean and sober. I decided then and there that the way to help him was not to."
We both hugged Clint and left the church. Our dads and our neighbors were waiting for us to go to brunch. We filled them in on Clint's visit to Carl. "Please," I begged everyone. "If he ever shows up and tries to convince you that he is a changed man, run away as far and as fast as you can."
To be continued........