My Head is a Jungle

By RM Lambert

Published on Jul 23, 2024

Gay

Well, here is Chapter 3. It's a much longer installment, which you will be glad to know does feature some spicy content finally. If you're enjoying it, or have feedback please do send some over to me. I've not had any mails and it would be nice to know at least 1 person is reading what I'm writing. Drop me a quick mail with thoughts, feedback, critique at rmlambertauthor@gmail.com. Remember to keep supporting Nifty and all the amazing work it does.

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Enjoy Chapter 3

Before he knew it, Friday night was here. Matty had advised Charlie that honesty was the best policy, so Charlie had negotiated with his parents a 12.30 curfew time, if Matty would take him and pick him up, and Holly would give Charlie a couple of cans of weak beer to drink at the party if he promised to stay away from anything stronger. Charlie felt this was fair, and his parents were actually happy that Charlie was actually getting out and spending time with his friends. The truth was, he didn't have much interest in drinking anyway. Like everything a teenager does, the beer was simply to fit in. Theo had talked about the party all week, how he was going to fuck Hannah tonight, finally. Charlie had his reservations. He also kept talking about how he was going to drink more than ever. Charlie and Louis had laughed about how they knew Theo was going to drink too much too early and be asleep and miss most of the party. As he stepped out of the shower, Charlie's phone lit up. It was Louis.

@louislouis69 Can Matty pick me up on the way? Cba getting the bus.

@charliesz Ye ofc. Be there in about.. 30 minutes. Just out of the shower.

@louislouis69 Thanks man! I'll wait on the corner. Let me know when you leave. What you wearing?

@charliesz umm. Just a white tee and jeans I think. Might put a shirt over it.

@louislouis69 fuck ok. See you in 30.

Yes, it was just a white tee, but make no mistake. Charlie was thoughtful and careful as he got dressed. It was a perfect, crisp white tee which just showed off his tight, athletic body. He accessorised with a couple of rings and a necklace his Mum had bought him last summer. The jeans were expensive and fit well in all the right places. He used the salt spray and put his hat on because it gave his middle parting the exact perfect hair every time. He considered which perfume to wear, and chose Bleu de Chanel. He squirted some on each wrist, and on his neck. So, while it was a simple outfit, the more you looked, the better he looked. This was his first party, and he wanted to look good, and well, he did. There was a knock at his bedroom door. "Come in!" he shouted. It was Matty. "Hey, man, are you nearly ready? Your uber driver is here. His name is Matty and he has 4.5 stars. But, there will be waiting time costs." Charlie laughed, "Yeah, I'm pretty much ready. Can we pick Louis up on the way?" Before he could answer, he added, "You know, because you are such a wonderful big brother." "Flattery will get you everywhere, Yes, fine. But come on! We have to speed up! All the good girls will be taken," Matty said. Charlie laughed, but before they left, Matty added, "Hey, Charlie, don't do anything tonight you don't want to, okay." Charlie considered Matty, "What do you mean?"

"Parties. People are going to have different drinks, different drugs probably. Whatever you choose to do, make sure it's because you want to." "Fucking hell, Matty, I'm not going to do any drugs." Charlie replied.

"I'm just saying! I did it all, and if I could, I'd do some things differently. That's all, but that's a conversation for another day, and just remember, I'm around tonight so text me if you need anything okay?" "Of course. I'm not stupid Matty." "You're the sensible one, as Mum often reminds me.. " Matty said with a smile.

"Exactly. Come on, Louis will be waiting for us."

"Look at my little brother. All grown up and off to his first party." Matty was laughing, "Have you got condoms?!" "Fuck off man!" Charlie threw a punch at Matty's arm and pushed past him laughing as they went down the stairs.

The car tyres screeched away, with a shout of, I'll be back at 12.30!' from Matty. Charlie and Louis walked up the drive of Simon's house. They could hear the thumping of music and the general noise of raucous teenagers. Charlie didn't know why, but he felt nervous. He smoothed down his hair like he always did when nervous, and said to Louis, "this will be fine, right?" Louis looked at Charlie. He always had that ability to make you feel like he could see into your darkest soul. "Of course! We'll have a few drinks. Talk to some girls. Dance a little. See where the night goes. It'll be fine." Charlie smiled back at Louis' expectant face. "Now, come on. Let's go in." Charlie followed Louis' lead and walked to the house. Simon's house was big, his Dad owning the Rugby club. Louis took the lead and knocked, while Charlie stood slightly awkwardly behind. The door opened. Of course, it was Theo. "BOYS!" He grabbed them both into a hug. Theo had a slight sheen of sweat on his face and his breath smelt like cheap beer and cigarettes. "I'm so fucking glad you're here boys" Theo shouted above the music which was loudly pumping throughout the house. "Simon knows way more people than we thought, so it's already pretty busy." Pretty busy was an understatement. As they took off their shoes and moved through the house, there were people filling every space. People from their year in school, classmates, people from the years above too, people Charlie had never seen before. "How many people are coming?!" Charlie shouted above the music. "Well.. we planned for around fifty, but... Simon's brother has brought some of his friends and they're in sixth form... and it's looking like it's going to be more like, 100?" Theo shouted. Shiiit, ' Charlie thought. Louis was already talking to some friends he played video games with he had spotted across the room. Charlie clutched the carrier bag his Mum had given him on the way out of the house. "Bro, what's in the bag?" Theo asked.

"Oh, my Mum gave me a couple of beers to drink!" Charlie said. "Fuck I wish my Mum was so chilled," Theo said, before adding, "come on then! Get one open!" He handed Theo and beer and took one for himself, opened them and clinked the cans together, "cheers!"

"Charlie, go and stick the others in the fridge. You can't carry the bag around all night - the kitchen is through there on the right. I'll be out back. I'm looking for Hannah ok - meet you there?"

Charlie moved through the party greeting friends as he went. It was warm, so he rolled the sleeves up on the white tee slightly too. Couldn't help to show off a little more of these arms he thought, as he caught two girls giggling and looking at him from across the room. The kitchen was full of people he didn't know. He politely moved to the fridge looking around the kitchen. At the backdoor was a group of sixth-formers he didn't really know. He was putting the beers into the fridge when one of the shelves on the fridge door gave way which sent condiments cascading all over the kitchen. `Shitttt' he thought and felt himself going red, he gathered as many as he could, bundling them back into the kitchen. He noticed a rogue bottle of ketchup had rolled right towards the back door and as he bent to pick it up, someone else had gone to do so. He looked up, and it was the skater boy from the schoolyard at the start of the week. Charlie just looked at him, and the boy said, "Did you drop this?" through a smile. "Fuck, yes. Sorry. It didn't get on you or anything did it? The fucking fridge shelf collapsed, I'm so so- The skater boy interrupted, "Shit man, don't stress it's all good." Charlie took the bottle from him, and looked at the boy. He had tight, messy curls which were growing long now. Big, shining innocent blue eyes hidden behind the curls, the faintest start of a moustache and a sprinkling of freckles across his nose and cheeks.He was tall, thin and had this energy surrounding him. He had baggy black jeans and a band tee that Charlie had never heard of. He had lots of jewellery on his fingers and a silver necklace, not unlike Charlie's round his neck. In many ways, this boy was the opposite of Charlie. If Charlie had a wholesome, handsome classically good looking vibe going on, this boy looked, well, cool, dangerous, the kind of boy your Mum would warn you about. There was something about him though. Charlie hated to admit it, but he thought the boy standing in front of him was beautiful. Suddenly, horrified, Charlie didn't realise how long he had been standing looking at the boy without saying anything. He looked at Charlie. Charlie didn't know what to say. "I'm Harry by the way."

"Charlie."

"Well, nice to meet you Charlie. Hey, do you want a cig? You seem a little, I dunno. Tight." "I don't smoke, but, thanks." Charlie looked at Harry again. Their eyes connected, and there was definitely something there. A tension, a smile. Charlie felt his cheeks going pink again and blurted out, "I got to go find my friend now". "You do that Charlie" Harry said mysteriously, "I hope I see you around again." He put a hand on Charlie's shoulder and as Charlie walked away the hand lingered, touching the bare skin of his arm as he walked away.

Head spinning from his encounter with Harry, he downed the beer he was holding. Realising he now couldn't go back into the kitchen to get another one, because that would be weird, he went over to the dining table where a large bowl of murky pink liquid sat, poured some into a cup and tasted. It tasted faintly of raspberry, but sour and strong. He drank the first cup down in one, shuddered, refilled his cup and went searching for Theo and Louis. He felt guilty because he had promised his mum he would only drink the beers he'd taken, but he was way too nervous to have another encounter with Harry in the kitchen. He found Theo and Louis both outside, sat in a large group with their other friends from school. The garden was slightly calmer than the house. Charlie was glad of the fresh air. Theo jumped up, "Jesus man where have you been?!" "Don't ask," Charlie replied.

"Dude, is that Simon's special punch you're drinking?" "Err.. the pink stuff from the bowl on the dining room table?" "Shit man, be careful that stuff is strong. There's two bottles of vodka in that."

Charlie nervously laughed and gently sipped the drink again. Come to think of it - that would explain the strong stinging feeling the drink gave his mouth. He sank back in his chair and allowed the chat to flow around him. As the murky pink drink slightly blurred the edges of Charlie's eyes, he enjoyed sitting there with Louis, Theo and the others listening to music, chatting shit, as it gradually went dark. Theo had refilled Charlie's cup twice in the hour they had sat, and as Charlie sat up, he suddenly became aware he definitely wasn't sober.

"Guys! Come on. There are so many hot girls inside. It's time." Theo said this with such authority that everyone stood up immediately. Charlie stumbled as he got up and Louis steadied him, "fuck, Charlie are you ok?" "Man, I'm good, don't worry", but he wasn't drunk enough to not hear the slight slur in his own voice. "No more pink drinks!" Louis said, laughing as they walked inside. As they walked in, Charlie realised how drunk he felt. The music and the lights made the room feel like they were spinning slightly. He watched Theo go straight over to Hannah, a girl he'd been obsessed with since year 8 and start talking to her. The other boys dispersed around the room. Louis started dancing to the music. "Come on!" he shouted. Charlie walked over, and definitely didn't feel drunk enough to dance. Almost immediately, two girls from their class danced over. They were two of the `popular' girls in the class. "Hey Charlie!" one of the girls called Ella said. Ella was tall, blonde and sporty. Charlie liked her. She was straight up, always said what she thought. He respected that about her. "Enjoying yourself?" he asked. "It's okay." she said with a slight look of contempt on her face, "Freya is way too drunk already. I feel like a babysitter." Charlie turned and Freya was dancing with Louis. Louis was laughing because Freya was throwing her limbs around like she had no control of them.

"She didn't drink that pink drink did she?!" Charlie asked.

"What?" The music had been turned up as Charlie spoke, and people had screamed and ran onto the makeshift dance floor. It was Sprinter by Dave and Central Cee, which Charlie did like a lot. He grabbed Ella's hand and started singing along and dancing with her. Charlie closed his eyes and took in the moment. The music, the flashing coloured lights, Ella's hands on his waist, the murky pink drink. At that moment, singing at the top of his lungs, Charlie felt euphoric. He looked around and saw Louis and Freya dancing, Theo and his other friends going crazy and Charlie closed his eyes and tried to commit the moment to his memory. He understood life was about moments, and this was one of them. "What are you thinking?!" Ella shouted in his ear.

"Fuck. Just. This Moment. I want to remember it!" Charlie shouted back.

Ella fixed him with a look of fire in her eyes, leaned forward and kissed him. For a moment he stood and took it, and then leaned in and kissed her back for a moment. It felt nice, her lips tasted faintly of the murky raspberry drink too. Warm and soft, he slid his hand down her back, and then, as if someone had thrown a bucket of cold water over him, he pulled away.

"Sorry, just, give me a minute," he said.

"Did I do something wrong?" Ella asked, concern all over her face.

"No, Ella, of course not, I'm just, I feel a little dizzy. Let me just go get some air okay. I'll find you soon." Without waiting for her reply, Charlie pushed through the dancefloor and headed for the garden.

Sat in the front garden, the noise of the music behind him, Charlie really could appreciate in this moment why people smoked. He sat, his head slightly dizzy from the drink but also completely lost as to why he'd pushed Ella away. She was tall, blonde, sexy, she clearly wanted him. Why did he push her away? So lost in his thoughts as he was, he didn't hear someone coming up from behind and sitting next to him.

"Here you are!"

It was Elias. Charlie gave him a genuine smile. He was glad to see him. Elias was wearing an emerald green shirt which completely complimented his eyes.Charlie could feel his leg pressed up against his own. His breath smelt like beer, and his eyes were similarly blurry to his.

"How's your night going?, it looks like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders sitting here on your own." Elias looked genuinely concerned. Charlie went to speak, but didn't exactly know what to say so just gave a big sigh and a noise that was something like agreement. Elias didn't speak, but just looked at Charlie. After a few seconds of silence, words began to spill out of Charlie's mouth. "Do you ever just look around and think, why does everyone fucking else know what they want but my head is just all over the place? Is there something wrong with me?" To Charlie's surprise, as he got to the end of saying that, his voice broke and he felt like he was about to cry. Elias put his hand on his back and exhaled deeply. "Man, of course not. You think anyone in there has any fucking idea about anything?! We're 15, 16, no one knows anything?! Everyones a screw up. There are girls in there so desperate for attention they have their tits hanging out. Guys doing anything to touch those tits. People being peer pressured into doing drugs to look cool. Guys being sick in the toilets from drinking. Charlie, everyone here is a screw up." He pulled Charlie closer and said, "There is nothing wrong with you - if anything - you are one of the most normal here. The evidence... star of the football team. Super nerd in school. Friends with everyone. Never said an unkind thing about anyone. Best looking guy in the room. All the girls are crazy about you." Charlie looked at him. They locked eyes. Elias added, more quietly this time, `some of the guys too." At that moment, all of the air was sucked out of the space around Charlie. All he could do was look at Elias. Elias. In his emerald green shirt with his green eyes and muscles. Elias was looking at him too. They both felt it, the unspeakable chemistry that was fizzing between them. He felt Elias' hand on his back, warm and comforting. Suddenly, the space between them was getting narrower, he could see the individual pores on Elias' nose, it was going to happen. He closed his eyes, and then-

BANG. The front door slammed open. They pulled away from each other as quickly as they could. Elias took his hand from Charlie's back. "Charlie! What the fuck are you doing out here! Ella is looking for you!"

"Shit. Sorry, me and Elias were talking tactics about the game on Saturday." "Have a day off will you for fucks sake! Elias, will you bring him inside! You can talk strategy tomorrow"

"Sure man. We'll be in now." Elias stood up and turned around. Charlie stayed sitting down. Theo shouted "Charlie! Kitchen in 2!". So he dragged himself up and looked at Elias, who looked at him. Charlie went to speak but Elias interrupted him. "Not now. Snap me later. We can walk home together. Talk then." Before Charlie could reply, Elias had swept back inside.

The cold air had sobered Charlie up. He went into the kitchen to meet Theo and took another beer from the fridge. He was glad to see Harry wasn't there anymore. Theo put his arm around Charlie's shoulder. "Man, I think I might actually fuck Hannah tonight." Charlie couldn't help noticing how drunk Theo was now. He was shouting and being quite lairy. "Theo, shut the fuck up, you're shouting. Drink some water man." Theo took the vape out of his pocket and inhaled deeply. "Do you want some?" Charlie just looked at him. "Fuck, okay. Sorry. I forgot your body is a temple!" Charlie laughed and said to Theo, "I feel a bit weird. Can we drink these beers, go find Louis and just spend a bit of time together?" "On two conditions," Theo replied, "One- we take a shot first and then we go find Louis. Two - 15 minutes of trio time. Then I go find Hannah... and you know what happens next."

"Of course I do, you fail to get a boner." Laughing they took the shot and went to find Louis. For the next thirty minutes the trio sang, danced, fell over, hugged each other and genuinely had the best time. Charlie pushed any thought of Elias, or Harry out of his head and focussed on making memories with his two best friends. It was so much fun. But then he looked round and Louis was making out hard with Freya. Theo grabbed him, kissed his cheek and said, "Charlie Brown, it has been my pleasure, but now, I need to find Hannah. Don't wait up." With that, he danced over to Hannah, who didn't look too impressed. Charlie grinned. However many beers in, he respected Theo's confidence. Charlie considered his options through his slightly woozy, drunken state and took his phone out and opened Snap.

@charliesz Meet me outside in 5 min?

@elias_dan12 I'll be there. ????

Elias was waiting for Charlie in the very spot they'd sat in earlier. "Looked like your night got better... It's lucky you're good at football though, you're never going to be a dancer." Charlie snorted and told him to fuck off. They walked down the drive in silence. But, a comfortable silence. When the house was behind them, Elias said, "you felt that too before right...?" The silence that followed was the other kind of silence, expectant, awkward. Charlie stopped and turned to Elias, who in turn looked back at him. "Elias, I, I, this is, I mean, I've never, you know, I guess, like, of course I want, but, I.." Elias was smiling watching Charlie absolutely fail to use full sentences. He stood watching until he came to the end of a sentence that never really started. Then he said, "come here!" and pulled Charlie down a sidestreet. It was narrow, and Charlie got a faint smell of piss from the alleyway. It was dark but the glow of the streetlights revealed enough of Elias' face. "Charlie. I'll keep this simple. This doesn't need to mean anything. We never need to talk about it again, but for whatever reason, at this moment, I really want to ki- before he could continue, Charlie had lunged at Elias, and pressed his lips against Elias. Elias stumbled back into the wall, and quickly reciprocated. It was, quite simply, a kiss from a movie. Bathed in the orange light of the alleyway, Charlie kissed Elias with everything he had, in the moment everything feeling completely right. Elias' lips were as soft as Ella's and his strong hands on Charlie's back made him kiss him even harder. Charlie opened his mouth to allow Elias' tongue access to his mouth and quickly their tongues were duelling for control. Elias could feel his back becoming scratched by the wall but he didn't care, in this moment all that mattered was kissing Charlie. The kiss lasted longer than it should, and eventually both boys had to break for breath. Breathing heavily, Elias pulled Charlie closer. "Holy fuck. That was... something." Charlie responded by kissing Elias again. As passionately as the first time his hands running through Elias' thick dark hair.

Undeniably, both boys could feel how hard the other was as they pushed close together. Elias broke first and put his hand under Charlie's tee and ran his hands up his body to his nipples. Charlie gasped but Elias continued exploring Charlie's body. Charlie, more awkward, put his hand on Elias' chest above his shirt and let Elias continue his journey. Eventually, Charlie felt one of Elias' strong hands touching his dick. "Wait. Elias." "Shhh" Elias whispered, "trust me", kissing Charlie once more, crouched down on his knees.

Charlie couldn't believe what was about to happen. Part of him wanted to tell him to stop, but the other part of him wanted it more than he'd ever wanted anything. He closed his eyes and let Elias undo his belt, unbutton his jeans, and gasped as Elias pulled down his boxers enough to let his dick spring out and be shocked by the cold air. "Holy shit Charlie it's huge." Charlie just smiled awkwardly, what could he say? Thank You? He couldn't believe Elias was about to be the first person to ever touch his dick, apart from himself. In an alleyway just off Simon's house. Elias wrapped his strong hands around Charlie's dick and began to slowly jerk him off. Charlie wanted to warn Elias that he wouldn't last long, but, for whatever reason the words never came to him. He rested his head against the cool brick wall and closed his eyes and enjoyed Elias playing with his dick. Maybe it was because he didn't know better, but Charlie would say Elias was an expert. He kept changing speeds and strengths of jerking, kept pausing to play with his balls, Charlie was in heaven. But then, it was done. Assuming Elias was about to stand up, Charlie was anticipating kissing him again. But then, another new sensation. Suddenly, his dick was enveloped with warmth, a feeling like he had never felt before. He looked down and Elias had taken his whole dick into his mouth. Charlie nearly buckled under the feeling. "Elias.." he went to say but Elias just kept on sucking. He had never felt anything like it, the warmth of Elias' mouth, the long deep sucking motion, the hands cupping his balls, Charlie was doing everything he could to not let out the loudest moan. He was biting the back of his hand, "fuck, your dick is so nice man', Elias said pausing for breath. He went straight back in and Charlie couldn't believe Elias could take it all right to the back of his throat without gagging. He spat on Charlie's dick making it wetter and began sucking harder and faster. Charlie knew he was close, he could feel that familiar sensation of cum building up inside him. He wished he could have lasted longer, but this was his first after all. He put his hand on Elias' head, "Elias, I'm going to, Fuck Elias I'm going to cum..." Elias didn't stop, but pushed Charlie's dick deeper down his throat. He couldn't hold it any longer. With that, his dick burst inside Elias' mouth. Wave after wave of cum blasted into his throat, and at first Elias tried to swallow, but the load was too big for him and he ended up with cum running out of his mouth and down his chin. But, he didn't give up and continued to take it all in mouth, as much as he could. Charlie couldn't believe how good it felt, he has never felt anything like it. It was like he was sucking out his very soul. As he was cumming, his toes had scrunched up in his shoes, and his eyes were seeing stars from how tightly he was squeezing his closed eyes together. Hands on Elias' shoulder, panting hard, "stop, stop, fuck, it's too sensitive." The world came back into focus. Suddenly, Charlie could hear the sounds of passing cars again. There was a quiet between them, Elias still on his knees.

Suddenly, a thought came to Charlie's mind. He took his phone out, the clock was 12.42. He had four messages and seven missed calls from Matty. He couldn't walk home with Elias because he was getting picked up by Matty! "Elias. I got to go! My brother is picking me up! I'm late. FUCK." He was trying to buckle up his belt and sort himself out as quickly as possible. "Charlie. Wait. What? We haven't - What? We were going to walk ho-" "I'll message you later, I promise. Matty's going to kill me!"

Elias went to speak, but he saw the panic in Charlie's eyes, and realised he wasn't going to be able to talk to him. "OK. Fuck. Go then." He looked at the ground. Charlie sped off, but stopped, turned around and said, "Elias, I'm sorry. We'll talk". With that he began to run back to Simon's house. Luckily it wasn't too far. As he ran up Simon's drive, he saw the familiar grey Volkswagen Golf that belonged to his brother. His brother stood outside the house, talking to Louis and Theo. As the gravel under his shoes crunched, they all turned round.

"Where the fuck have you been!?!" Matty shouted.

"I forgot you were picking me up! I started walking home. Sorry." Charlie said, sheepishly.

"But, I'd have driven past you? I didn't see you on the road." Matty was visibly annoyed.

"I must have taken a different way. Shit, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking, it was the pink drink. I'm here now." Theo and Louis were looking at him like they wanted to say something, but sensed perhaps now wasn't the time.

"Just get in. Louis, do you want a ride home? Theo, are you ok?" Matty didn't look at Charlie.

Theo replied he was going to stay and help Simon tidy up, Louis jumped into the back seat next to Charlie. Matty put his music on loudly, a sign that he was annoyed with Charlie. Louis whispered, "Dude, are you okay? Where were you?" Charlie replied, "I told you, it's nothing man." He went back to looking out of the window. After dropping Louis off, Matty turned the music down. "Are you sure there is nothing you want to talk about man?" "No. Fuck, Matty I told you I just drunkenly got mixed up it's nothing."

But sitting in the back of Matty's car, Charlie considered what had happened that night. He'd had that moment with Harry, kissed Ella, and perhaps most momentously, gotten his first blowjob. Even more astonishingly, from Elias. Fuck. Elias. He took his phone out and went to message Elias.

@charliesz Dude my brother was picking me up at 12.30 and I was late and he was pissed. Did you get home ok? Sorry for running away.

@elias_dan12 It's fine.

@charliesz I don't know what happened tonight. Guess I was just drunk lol. Can we forget what happened?

@elias_dan12 [ Snap opened 1 minute ago ].

Elias didn't respond to Charlie. He knew he was probably mad with him, but it couldn't happen again. He wasn't gay.

rmlambertauthor@gmail.com

Next: Chapter 4


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