Phases

Copyright and Disclaimer: 1. This is a fictional story with fictional characters. 2. No one is to steal this story under any circumstances. 3. This story deals with relationships and not sex, so if you're looking for a story with a lot of sex in it, this isn't the story for you.

Hey everyone, welcome back. Here's chapter 31 entitled 'Phases Three aka Denial'

'PHASE THREE aka DENIAL'

It was two weeks since Nick's death. It was the day of Nick's funeral. Jesse was sitting in the living room with Leo while they waited for Kurt to finish getting ready. Leo was in total shock over the whole situation, he still couldn't believe his best friend was gone. Jesse held his hand tightly, doing everything he could to assure him that he wasn't alone in this.

"How are you holding up?" Jesse asked.

"It's still unreal," Leo replied. "I still can't believe that he's gone."

"You've been holding up really well given the circumstances," Jesse said. "I'm proud of you."

"I have to," Leo said. "I don't want to fall apart in front of Kurt. I have to be strong for him."

"I've been wanting to talk to you about him," Jesse said. "Is he okay? When I've seen him he doesn't seem to be really affected by all this, he's been acting-"

"Numb," Leo finished Jesse's sentence.

"Yeah," Jesse said.

"I know," Leo replied. "I just think he's really in denial over all of this. I think he feels that if he falls apart then it will just make it that much more real that Nick isn't coming back."

"Have you talked to him?" Jesse asked.

"I tried," Leo answered, "But he just tells me he's okay. He won't talk much about it."

"Maybe he should," Jesse suggested. "Maybe you and him should both go to some grief counseling. Help you deal with this."

"I can't think about that now," Leo said. "Right now I just have to try and make it through the day."

"We should probably get going," Jesse said looking at his watch.

"I'll get Kurt," Leo said getting up and knocking on Kurt's door, "Kurt, you ready?"

There wasn't an answer, before Leo could knock again there was a knock on the front door. When Leo answered the door, Ryan was standing there dressed for the service.

"Hey," Ryan said giving Leo a hug, "You okay?"

"Doing my best," Leo replied. "Thanks for coming."

"Of course. Nick meant a lot to me too," Ryan said.

"Hey Ryan," Jesse greeted giving him a hug.

"We're just waiting for Kurt," Leo said. "He better hurry. We're going to be late."

"Why don't you two go on ahead and I'll go get him," Ryan said.

"You sure?" Leo asked.

"Yeah, we'll meet you two at the church," Ryan replied.

"All right," Leo said grabbing his jacket as him and Jesse left.

Ryan went and knocked on Kurt's door. "Kurt, it's Ryan. Can I come in?"

Again, there was no answer. Ryan then slowly opened the door and saw Kurt blankly looking into the mirror as he absent-mindedly adjusted the tie on his suit.

"Kurt," Ryan said softly, "We have to get going."

"Huh?" Kurt asked snapping out of his daze, "Oh yes, right. We should go." Kurt then gave Ryan a smile, "Nice of you to come."

"Are you okay?" Ryan asked noticing that Kurt was acting a little too chipper to be going to his best friend's funeral.

"I'm fine," Kurt replied. "Let's go."

"Kurt, wait," Ryan said taking Kurt by the hand. "You can talk to me. It's okay if you're really upset right now."

"Ryan, really I'm okay," Kurt said. "These things happen. We have to move on though right?"

"I guess," Ryan replied, but knowing that Kurt was acting strangely.

"Where's Leo and Jesse?" Kurt asked as they headed for the door.

"They went ahead," Ryan said. "I told them we'd meet them down there."

"Oh, okay," Kurt replied. "Well, do you want me to drive?"

"No, I'll drive," Ryan said. "Is Gabriel coming?"

"Apparently his flight got canceled so he won't make it out here until this evening," Kurt sighed, "Just can't trust those airlines sometimes."

"Kurt, why are you acting like this?" Ryan asked.

"Acting like what?" Kurt replied.

"Like nothing happened," Ryan said. "I mean, I'm not saying that I want you to be crying and destroyed, but you're acting like Nick just moved away."

"Well, he was going to move away before he died," Kurt said, "So, inevitably I was going to have to face life with out him right? This is me facing it."

"I don't think you are facing it," Ryan said.

"Ryan, we don't have time for this," Kurt said, "We have to get down to the church and you know how I hate to be late."

Kurt then headed out the door in front of Ryan who stood in shock for a moment at how lightly Kurt was taking the whole situation.

When Ryan and Kurt got to the church they went and sat in the front row by Luke, Jesse, Leo and Nick's parents. Kurt put a comforting arm around Leo who was already starting to shed tears. The church was filled with people. They consisted of family, friends, co-workers, anyone that Nick touched and that was a lot of people. The service was being lead by a young female pastor.

"No one can fully understand why some are taken from us so suddenly, so unexpectedly," the pastor said. "We are here today not to say goodbye to Nick, but rather welcome him to a different destiny in store for him. He can look on and watch over us all and we can be blessed to know that he has now found peace."

Through out her words Leo broke down crying. Jesse held his hand tightly as Kurt put an arm around him to comfort him. Everyone was crying except for Kurt. He remained emotionless through out the ceremony, not letting on how he truly felt. Ryan looked over and noticed that Kurt wasn't crying and couldn't help but be shocked and a little disappointed at his lack of emotion.

"We have two people here who would like to share some thoughts about Nick. They were his best friends, Kurt Parker and Leo Washington," the pastor said. Kurt and Leo then both went up to the podium to talk about Nick. On their way to the podium Kurt looked over at Nick's closed casket where he now laid. He gave a look of wonder and almost confusion looking at the casket.

"Kurt," Leo said getting Kurt's attention. Kurt shook his head and then joined Leo at the podium.

"Kurt's better at the speaking then me so he's going to start," Leo said to the people in the church. Kurt then looked at all the people in the church, all of them there to mourn Nick. He then gazed towards the ground and again gave a look of confusion. The people in the church were waiting for Kurt to talk, the whole place was in silence. Ryan and Jesse both exchanged glances with each other and Luke and then Leo who was trying to get Kurt to say something.

"Are you okay?" Leo whispered, "Say something."

"Huh?" Kurt asked snapping out of his daze.

"We're sharing our thoughts on Nick," Leo replied.

"Right," Kurt said shaking his head. "Right."

"Do you want to begin?" Leo asked.

"No, it's okay," Kurt said looking out into the people again, "Nick's a great guy. There's no one better then him. He is always there for people when they need him. He is my big brother."

Ryan couldn't help but notice that Kurt talked about Nick in the present tense as if Nick was still alive and well. Kurt grew silent again, not knowing what else to say.

"I'll go ahead and finish," Leo said taking out a piece of paper where he wrote down a little speech, "No matter what went on in our lives we always knew we could count on Nick for guidance, for support, for a listening ear. He was the type of person who everyone wants in their lives, the type of person who loves unconditionally and who does everything he could to help out those who need it. He was the best friend to us, the best boyfriend to Luke, the best son to Hannah and Lionel. He was successful in everything he did and we will always love him and remember him." Leo set the paper down to say a few words from his heart. "I don't know if many of you know this but I wouldn't be here today if it weren't for Nick. A while back I was on this downward spiral and became an alcoholic, Nick was the most instrumental in making sure I got help. He wouldn't give up on me no matter how many times I told him to leave me alone. He knew I could fight it and he knew that I needed him. He saved my life."

Some of the people in the Church started smiling, remembering what a great guy Nick was.

"Nick and I were always getting into stupid little fights because we were so opposite of each other," Leo said. "We'd fight about such small little things and Kurt always had to mediate between us."

"It isn't easy breaking those fights up," Kurt said. The people in the church all laughed a little, welcoming a brief moment of relief.

"I'll miss those fights," Leo said. "I'll miss our banters and our disagreements."

Leo looked into the audience and made eye contact with Luke.

"One thing that I know Nick was most proud of was his relationship with Luke Grayson. Him and Luke didn't have the easiest relationship. There were things that complicated matters and made things difficult and I was one of those things. For that I am truly sorry and will regret every day the fact that I was a hardship on that for so long. Nick loved Luke so much and Luke loved him. I remember Nick telling me how happy he was with Luke. There was a period of time when Nick never seemed truly happy, but when he was with Luke you could tell he had a look that was so happy and so complete."

Luke gave Leo a grateful smile.

"Nick was with out a doubt the big brother to Kurt and I. He always watched out for us and always made sure we were okay. We always knew we could turn to him for help and I will be forever grateful to that." Leo said.

Kurt and Leo then stepped down from the podium and sat back down as the pastor finished up the service.

After the service there was a wake at the house of Nick's parents. Ryan, Kurt, Jesse and Leo were standing together when Joey came up to them.

"Excuse me," Joey said, "Sorry, I don't mean to barge in on your conversation."

"Joey" Ryan said, pleased to see him again, "How are you?"

"I'm okay," Joey replied. "I can't believe that Nick is really gone."

"You knew Nick?" Leo asked.

"Yeah, he had helped me out a few times in the past," Joey replied. "I just wanted to come and give my condolences."

"It's sweet of you to come," Ryan said.

"Had to," Joey said. "Nick and you were the only people who actually took a chance on me. I really appreciate that."

"What did he help you with?" Leo asked, "If you don't mind me asking."

"It was months ago, my mom had kicked me out of the house for being gay and he talked to her and tried to get her to understand me more," Joey said, "And it worked for a bit, but she just could never get used to it. So when I turned 18 I moved out."

"And where do you live now?" Leo asked.

"I was living with some friends, but it didn't work out. So now I'm just going from place to place," Joey replied.

"What?" Leo asked saddened to hear that. "Listen, if you ever need anything stop by the Gay and Lesbian Center. I work there so just look for me and we can talk."

"Thanks," Joey said gratefully. "I should go, I just wanted to pay my respects."

"Thank you," Kurt said shaking Joey's hand.

Joey then left the wake as Luke walked up to them.

"Hey guys," Luke said sadly.

"Hey Luke," Kurt said giving Luke a hug.

"How are you doing?" Leo asked.

"Horribly," Luke replied. "I don't even know what to think anymore."

"I know," Leo sighed.

"I just wanted to tell you guys that I'm going to San Diego still," Luke said.

"You are?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah, I have to get out of here. Everything just reminds me of him and it's too hard," Luke replied.

"I understand," Leo said.

Kurt grew silent not knowing what to think about the situation. With Luke going it was starting to be that much more real to Kurt.

"Will you please keep in touch?" Leo asked.

"Yeah," Luke replied. "I'll stop by tonight before I leave."

"Okay," Leo said.

"I have to leave here," Luke said wiping away some tears, "I can't be here anymore. It's too hard. I'll see you guys tonight."

Luke then left the wake as well.

"It's real now," Leo sighed. "With Luke going it just makes all of this that much more real."

"You okay?" Ryan asked Kurt.

"I'm fine," Kurt lied. "You know, it's just really depressing here. I'm going to go home."

"Are you sure?" Leo asked.

"Yeah. I'll see you guys later," Kurt said as he headed out the door.

"What's going on with Kurt?" Ryan asked.

"You've notice it's too huh?" Leo asked.

"It's kind of hard not to notice," Ryan said.

"I just think he's in denial," Leo said.

"It is one of the stages of grief," Jesse said.

"Stages?" Ryan asked.

"Yeah, there are five stages of grief," Jesse replied. "Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and then finally acceptance."

"How do you know that?" Leo asked.

"I read it in an article in the waiting room when I was in therapy," Jesse replied.

"Impressive," Ryan said.

"So how do we help him?" Leo asked.

"Have him face what happened," Jesse replied.

"If going to Nick's funeral today didn't help him face what happened then what will?" Ryan asked.

"Maybe taking him to Nick's apartment," Jesse suggested.

"I don't think Kurt's ready for that, I don't think I'm ready for that," Leo said.

"He's only been gone a couple weeks," Ryan said. "Maybe we should just give it time."

"Kurt needs to grieve," Jesse said. "He needs to feel it. It's a part of moving on."

"You should talk to him Leo," Ryan said. "You're the one who knows what he's going through the most."

"Do you really think that I should take him to Nick's place?" Leo asked dreading going there himself.

"Listen babe," Jesse said giving Leo a comforting hug, "If you're not ready to go there then don't take him there, but just talk to him. I think he needs you now more then you know."

"Okay," Leo said. "I'll see you guys later."

"Good luck babe," Jesse said giving Leo a kiss.

Leo then left heading home to talk to Kurt.

"So how are you doing?" Ryan asked Jesse. "This has really been a hectic time for you. Getting your memory back, then Nick."

"I'm doing okay," Jesse replied. "I'm really sad about Nick, he was a great guy and a great friend, but I have to be strong for Leo. He needs me now."

"That's good," Ryan said.

"How about you?" Jesse asked. "What's going on between you and Kurt? He's still with Gabriel right?"

"Nothing's going on," Ryan said. "There were talks about something maybe, but with everything that happened we just kind of pushed all that to the side."

"You okay with that?" Jesse asked.

"Yeah," Ryan replied. "Because I know now isn't the time to be talking to Kurt about that. He has enough on his plate he has to deal with, I don't want to be an extra burden on him."

"That's noble of you," Jesse said. "You worried at all he might move on from you though?"

"Kurt and I have this connection with each other," Ryan explained, "No matter what, I know that in the end we'll find a way to each other."

"Hope you're right," Jesse said. "Don't get me wrong, Gabriel is a great guy, but from what I remember about you and Kurt together and the way you've been there for both him and Leo through all of this, it just shows how much you really love him. I think he deserves that kind of love from someone."

"Thanks," Ryan said gratefully.

"You know, this is probably the first time you and I really had a chance to talk with each other," Jesse pointed out.

"Yeah, I think you're right," Ryan replied realizing it as well.

"We should hang out some time," Jesse said. "When Kurt and Leo have their time with each other, we should go grab a drink or something."

"Definitely," Ryan replied. From that moment Jesse and Ryan started to form a friendship with one another.

Kurt was sitting on the bed in his room, motionless, thinking over everything that's happened. It was still unreal to him, he still couldn't accept that Nick wasn't there anymore, he didn't understand it, he didn't want to understand it.

"Kurt," Leo said knocking on the door. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah sure," Kurt said wiping away tears that were beginning to form.

"How are you?" Leo asked walking in.

"I'm doing okay," Kurt replied. "How are you?"

"Terrible," Leo said. "I can't even really explain it."

"I'm sorry," Kurt said. "Come here."

Leo went next to Kurt as he hugged him tightly.

"You'll be okay," Kurt said.

"I know," Leo said. "I know that eventually I'll get through this. The question is, will you be okay?"

"Yeah," Kurt replied. "I'm fine. These things happen, it's sad, but they happen every day."

"But not to our best friend," Leo pointed out.

Kurt grew silent, not knowing what to say. He didn't want to talk about Nick. In fact since Nick died, Kurt made it a point to talk about Nick as less as possible.

"Kurt, we need to go somewhere," Leo said. "Nick's parents want us to go to Nick's apartment and finish packing some stuff up."

"They do?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah," Leo lied. They didn't ask him, but it was the only thing he could think of to get Kurt to go over to Nick's place.

"You know, I would, but Gab is coming in later today," Kurt said.

"You can see him later," Leo replied. "We won't be there long."

"Maybe tomorrow, or next week," Kurt said trying to get out of going to Nick's place. "Why don't we wait and we'll go with Jesse and Ryan and Gab."

"Kurt, please," Leo begged. "I don't want to go there by myself."

Kurt looked in Leo's eyes and saw how desperate he was for Kurt to go with him.

"Okay," Kurt sighed, "But promise me we won't be there long."

"I promise," Leo said.

"Fine," Kurt sighed.

On the way to Nick's place Kurt and Leo were silent, both not wanting to go to Nick's apartment. Leo knew he had to take Kurt there, he had to get Kurt to not deny the reality of what happened anymore.

When they got to Nick's front door Kurt stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong?" Leo asked.

"I can't go in," Kurt replied backing away from the door.

"Come on Kurt," Leo said taking Kurt's hand, "We need to do this."

"No," Kurt replied. "Why can't someone else do it?"

"Because you need to," Leo blurted out. He then realized he blew his cover, "I mean, Nick's parents want us to."

"What?" Kurt asked. He then realized, "Nick's parents didn't want us to come here. You wanted to bring me here."

"Yes," Leo sighed. "I wanted you to come here."

"Why?" Kurt asked.

"Because the way you're acting now is not right," Leo replied. "You're avoiding what happened. Nick died."

"Don't say that," Kurt said.

"Why not? It's the truth," Leo said. "I hate saying it, but it's true. Nick is dead."

"Stop it Leo," Kurt snapped, his eyes starting to fill with tears.

Leo opened the door to Nick's apartment.

"Look inside there," Leo said pointing through the doorway. "He isn't here anymore."

"No," Kurt said not wanting to face that.

"Kurt, I hate saying it. You know I loved Nick just as much as you did," Leo said. "He was our best friend and it doesn't make sense that he's gone, but he is. We have to face that."

"He can't leave me," Kurt said shaking his head. "He wouldn't."

"He didn't have a choice sweetie," Leo said.

"No!" Kurt yelled. Leo quickly grabbed Kurt and pulled him into Nick's apartment and closed the door.

"Be quiet," Leo said. "You don't want to bug the other neighbors."

The two of them looked around, both realizing that they were standing inside of Nick's apartment. Kurt quickly headed for the door, but Leo stopped him.

"No," Leo said. "We have to stay here. We have to face this."

"I don't want to," Kurt said.

"Well you have to," Leo said. "Kurt, we went to his funeral today. He's gone. You just have to accept that."

"You make it sound like it's an easy thing to do," Kurt said.

"I know it isn't," Leo said. "I know it's hard. Especially for you since you've known him the longest out of all of us, but we have to get through this."

"I can't," Kurt said. "He's been there for me for twelve years!"

"I know," Leo said hugging Kurt tightly, "I know. But you have to be strong and face this. Face it with me.

I don't want to go through this alone and if you keep living in denial over this then you will never move on. Look around Kurt, he's not here anymore."

Kurt and Leo both took a moment to look at the apartment, while Nick's things were there it still felt very empty at the same time. Feeling the emptiness inside is what finally hit Kurt, who broke down in tears and fell to the floor. Leo quickly rushed to him.

"Just let it out," Leo said holding Kurt tightly.

"Why was he taken from us?" Kurt cried, "Why? It wasn't supposed to be this way!"

"I know," Leo said. "It's not fair."

"I want him back," Kurt cried, "I want him back so bad."

"I do to," Leo said. "I do to."

"Please come back Nick," Kurt cried and begged, "Please come back. I need you here."

"He's not coming back Kurt," Leo said sadly, "He's gone."

There was a light knock on the door and then Ryan and Jesse came in.

"What are you guys doing here?" Leo asked.

"We realized that you two might need some support," Jesse said. "Two of you coming here alone I'm sure is tough on you."

"Thanks," Leo said gratefully.

"You need me to help?" Ryan asked as he leaned down and rubbed Kurt's back. Kurt leaned into Ryan's chest crying, finally feeling the pain of losing Nick. "It's okay Kurt. It's going to be okay."

"No it's not," Kurt cried.

"You'll make it through this," Ryan assured. "I promise."

"How could he just leave us like this?" Kurt asked.

"Kurt, it wasn't his decision," Ryan said.

"We didn't even get a chance to say goodbye to him," Kurt said. "He was just gone. How could he do this?"

"I'm so sorry Kurt," Ryan said holding Kurt tightly.

"Come on," Jesse said taking Leo's hand, "Let's leave them alone."

When they walked outside Jesse put his arms around Leo, holding him close. "You did good babe."

"You think?" Leo asked.

"Yeah, he's feeling it," Jesse replied.

"At the end there it almost sounded like he was mad at Nick," Leo pointed out.

"I think he's starting to move to stage two of grieving," Jesse replied.

"Anger," Leo said remembering the five stages of grief.

That night Ryan took Kurt home and walked him to the front door. Kurt finally stopped crying and was really tired. He was emotionally and physically drained.

"Thanks for taking me home," Kurt said.

"It's no problem," Ryan said. "Just get some rest okay?"

"Yeah," Kurt nodded.

Ryan started to walk off.

"Ryan?" Kurt called out.

"Yeah?" Ryan asked walking back to him.

"Thank you for being there for me at the apartment," Kurt replied. "It meant a lot."

"You're welcome," Ryan said giving Kurt a hug, "If you or Leo need anything. I want you to call me okay?"

"Okay," Kurt replied. "Thank you."

"Kurt!" a voice called out.

Kurt looked over Ryan's shoulder and saw Gab walking up to them.

"Hey Gab," Kurt said as him and Ryan separated.

"Hey, I'm sorry I couldn't be there earlier today," Gab said giving Kurt a hug, "How are you doing?"

"I'm all right," Kurt said. "Ryan helped me out a lot."

"Thanks for that," Gab said shaking Ryan's hand.

"No trouble at all," Ryan smiled, suddenly feeling out of place.

"Well you have me for the next two days," Gab said giving Kurt a kiss.

"Great," Kurt smiled as he opened the door to his apartment.

"I should get going," Ryan said backing away.

"Do you want to come in for a bit?" Kurt asked not wanting Ryan to leave.

"No, another time," Ryan said. "I'll check in on you later."

"All right," Kurt said. "Thank you again Ryan."

"You're welcome," Ryan smiled. "Good night Gabriel."

"Good night Ryan," Gab replied as him and Kurt went inside Kurt's apartment.

Ryan then walked alone to his car, hoping that one day soon it would be right again for him and Kurt.

A little later on, Kurt, Leo, Gab and Jesse were sitting in the living room of the apartment together. Gab was holding Kurt while Jesse was holding Leo. They all were very quiet, not too sure what to talk about in the situation they were currently in. The silence was quickly disrupted though by a knock on the door. Leo answered it and was happy to see Luke.

"Hey," Leo said giving Luke a hug.

"Hey, I just came by to say goodbye like I promised," Luke said.

"You're really leaving?" Kurt asked, his eyes beginning to fill with tears again.

"Yeah," Luke said. "I can't be here anymore. I'm sorry."

"We understand," Leo said.

"We'll give you three some privacy," Jesse said motioning for Gab to follow him into Leo's bedroom. "Good luck with everything Luke."

"Thanks," Luke replied as him and Gab left the room.

"Do you want to sit down?" Leo asked motioning to the couch.

"No, I should get going pretty quick," Luke replied.

"You take care of yourself," Kurt said giving Luke a hug.

"I just wanted to thank you for always being so great to me," Luke said to Kurt. "When Nick and I got back together I'm sure you were a bit hesitant of it, but I appreciate you welcoming me back."

"I saw that he made you happy and you made him happy," Kurt replied. "That's all I could want for both of you."

"You've been great," Luke said.

"So have you," Kurt replied, tears coming down his cheeks. "With you going it just makes it that much more real that he's gone. I'm going to miss you."

"I'll miss you too," Luke said crying as well, "But I have to do this."

"I know," Kurt sighed. Luke then turned to Leo.

"Luke, I know that I made things rough for you since you came back into Nick's life," Leo said.

"Leo, you don't need to apologize," Luke replied. "I understand. You were just looking out for him."

"I hate that it took me so long to see how happy he was with you," Leo said tearing up, "In the end, that's all that matters. You made him happy and I couldn't be more grateful for that. You were the great love of his life."

"And he was the great love of mine," Luke said. "I don't think I'll ever find anyone I love as much as him."

"You are a good person Luke," Leo said. "I can see just how much you changed and how great you really are. You will find love again. I'm sure of it."

"You think?" Luke asked.

"I do," Leo replied.

"No one will ever by like Nick though," Luke said.

"No one ever could," Leo replied. "He was too special of a person."

"Yeah," Luke sighed missing Nick so badly.

"You're the only person I know who could possibly know the pain that Kurt and I are feeling," Leo said.

"I do," Luke said. "I miss him so much."

"Me too," Leo said hugging Luke tightly.

"We've had a long and complicated history Leo," Luke said. "I'm glad that we're at least saying goodbye on a good note."

"It's not goodbye," Leo said. "You still have to keep in contact with me okay? You promised you wouldn't leave my life again, remember?"

"Yeah," Luke nodded. "I'll write you."

"Good," Leo said giving Luke a hug. "Take care of yourself."

"You too," Luke replied.

Luke then slowly headed for the door. He turned back to Kurt and Leo and gave them both a brave smile. Kurt and Leo quickly went up to Luke and the three held each other tightly, all crying, all mourning the loss of Nick. After a few moments Luke finally left. While they told Luke to keep in touch, deep down inside they knew that they probably would never hear from him again. They realized that keeping in touch with them would just make it harder on him to move on.

All they could do now was just wish him the best in life and hope he makes it through all of this okay.

In the middle of the night Leo woke up from a dream he had about Nick. Ever since Nick died he dreamed of him every night. It was always the same, he was trying desperately to reach out and grab Nick's hand. But right when their hands were about to touch, Leo would wake up. Leo got out of bed and went to get a glass of water. When he opened the door to his room he saw Kurt sitting in the dark on the couch in the living room.

"Hey, couldn't sleep either?" Kurt asked.

"Had a dream about Nick," Leo replied.

"Me too," Kurt said.

"It seems like the world is a lot scarier, doesn't it?" Leo asked. "It's like Nick was this great protector, our super hero."

"Yeah," Kurt agreed. "Now we've lost our safety net."

"I guess there's only one question that scares me the most to even ask," Leo said.

"Where do we go from here?" Kurt asked, knowing that was the scariest question that Leo and Kurt both didn't know how to answer. The two stayed out in the living room together in silence for the rest of the night holding each other and mourning the loss of their best friend, their big brother, their Nick.

To Be Continued...

I know many are still upset over the loss of Nick, but please keep reading because I promise that I did this because I think it will ultimately serve to be a good change for the story.

With any comments, questions or feedback please e-mail me at ilj4ever44@yahoo.com.