Sex God Saga

Sex God Saga 25

Where Sleeping Gods Are Dreaming

MONDAY:

The morning fog refused to dissipate under the overcast sky. Fields lay in hazy white, interspersed with small forests where all but the evergreens were shedding their browned foliage.

Theo drew his jacket closed and shivered.

The assembly of about twenty Knowing was loosely grouped around the various cars they'd arrived in.

When Mako had looked for weird animal behavior to find Theo, he'd stumbled over a lot of reports from this area. Foxes falling asleep under car hoods, a drowsy hog walking into a house, some anecdotal cases of lethargy in humans. Dream wisps, most likely. It was a big area to cover.

Juniper, the team Delta `liaison', clapped his hands. "In order to cover as much ground as possible, we'll split up. Maintain contact with other groups. Maintain sightlines with your team mates. Maintain seals."

Theo found his group, led by Keith in a white jacket with reflector strips and a beany. Fulin and Coralline were his team mates.

Paris, who had brought Cain, was in a group with Mo.

Mira walked by and gave them nods as greeting. She shot her teammate Ace a compliment on his lilac hair, then made off with him, Jun and Ray.

More senior shamans walked toward the forests, while Keith showed his teammates the fields they were supposed to zigzag through.

"Fog shouldn't really interfere," Keith said. "Summoning works through anything less dense than cardboard. Just keep your eyes peeled."

Coralline looked at her phone. She was the one keeping contacts going. "Alessandra is detecting Watcher activity."

"Then we know it's big," Keith said. "Unless it's just going to gawk at Theo again."

"Sorry for being a lightning rod," Theo said. He stepped on an eye-shaped clump of mud. The Watcher was kind of annoying.

The field offered no Outsider activity, and neither did the next.

"Heads up," Coralline said. "Hostile Redeemers have been spotted. Including the old geezer, `grandmaster' Adam."

"Direction?"

"Spreading out but mostly focused on buildings. The fog is really on our side here."

Keith hummed. "Might just be looking for possessed people, but maybe they know something we don't. Hard to say how their superpowers work. What do our Redeemers think?"

"Uh, should I ask?"

"Godrick is a slayer," Keith said, "but Dawn's a ranger-trapper hybrid so she might have inklings or visions or whatever similar to the hostiles."

Theo checked the noosphere. It threw uncertainty and anxiousness at him, in the sights and memories he was familiar with. That wasn't exactly helping him feel less spooked.

Fulin growled. No, the sound was coming from the muse in his torso - Weidong.

"Down," Fulin hissed. He pulled Theo into a crouch even though the blond Mirrorgnost had already been obeying.

Two silhouettes moved past in the distance with leaps longer than any athlete could have made.

"A girl and a woman," Fulin whispered.

"Liturgy," Keith said, "trapper. And either her mom or aunt. So, ranger or slayer-trapper hybrid. Guessing second since we weren't spotted."

"Retreat?" Coralline asked. "We've not seen so much as a Vestige. If anything the area is suspiciously cleaned out."

Fulin gestured. "More coming from there. Moving at a right angle to the females. They're covering a grid pattern."

The team leading Duskwright squinted. "There's a church the other way. The women probably came from there, so they'd have checked it off the list. We hide out until they've passed."

Crouch-sneaking, the four slipped toward the wood building. It had been a church once, but with the small farming community turning industrial it had been converted into a storage barn. The dim interior smelled of sawdust, barred windows behind covered machine parts blocking the outside.

Phones lit the area as they advanced on the mix of old and new floorboards.

"Vestiges," Fulin said. He was looking down where his sneakers – inhabited by Xiang – left a few snowflakes along the planks. "Outsiders walked here. Or floated, whatever. Not really jackpot but..."

"Reporting it," Coralline said. "Makes me wonder if the Redeemers know and plan on coming back."

Keith took a deep breath and kept going. "Let's check it off our list then."

There was only one door and it was locked with a padlock. Keith magicked it open with a jiggle from Biscuit's key vessel.

The former churches' backroom had become an office, slightly messy but not abandoned. Nothing out of the ordinary except for the Vestiges practically littering the walls as faint smears under mediumship.

"Did they store wisps in here?" Fulin wondered. "Or run experiments? Assuming this is the dream wisp factory we've been looking for, there should have been a muse that bound them all. This could have been a sanctuary."

Keith nodded. "If the muse had a roaming vessel it could have just moved the wisp factory elsewhere. We shou-" He froze. "Guys? This place is bigger on the inside. I'm not misjudging, right?"

"Yeah, it's too wide," Theo said and checked the anti-dream seal on his lapel.

"Maybe-"

Fulin slapped his hand over Keith's mouth, his head twitching.

Two pairs of footsteps entered the barn and headed straight for the office. Too late to hide.

An old, haggard, blue eyed, white haired man with an angry glare. Adam. With him was Gideon – thinning black hair, sharp cheekbones, gun out.

Keith waved his hands and a wall of darkness rose at the office entrance. The enemy was cut off but there was no other exit.

Muffled, slurred speech - Adam. "Our lord Jesus, help me in this time of need. Let my son do your noble work to eradicate the demons."

The darkness dissipated. Fucking Redeemer superpowers.

Gideon aimed with one hand, talking into a phone he held in the other.

"Dash!" Keith yelled and the office's heavy, main desk slammed itself into the doorframe. Adam on the other side fell with a surprised shout.

Fulin rammed his body into a wooden back wall and tore a hole to the outside, cast in diffuse daylight. He ripped planks with bare hands, Weidong's spectral paws seeping through his skin.

Team delta-2 hurried to exit the deathtrap through the wall hole. They stumbled through a field but were encircled by three figures. Genesis, Liturgy, Sacred. Mother, daughter, adoptive cousin.

"Oh Lord," Liturgy intoned, "let your will be done and-"

Fulin kicked the air and ice crystals flew from his sneakers as if they'd been on the ground for him to kick up. The girl screeched and fell back with a shout of "Aarh, exclamations!"

Genesis shot her gun. Fulin caught the bullet from the air, the wisp in his yang-tattoo getting expended. He went on the offensive but the woman faded into the mist, able to turn near invisible under the right conditions.

Sacred closed in with his ranger-speed and shoved Theo to the ground. The Chinese man with a fauxhauk and a bulky leather jacket easily pinned than the shaman.

Theo called Glowy to aid.

A red rash ripped along Sacred's arms, up the neck. Something like magic sunburn. The Redeemer grunted and pushed himself away.

Fulin and Coralline held Liturgy's arms behind the girl's back.

"We have your daughter," Keith shouted. "Show yourself. Pretty sure I managed to blind you before you went chameleon on us."

"Let me go, hooligan," Liturgy said. "Witch! Sorcerer! Utter... not-nice fool. By the holy flame in my heart, my love of God will protect me from your foul touch."

"Ouch," Keith mocked. "Tank, ordered retreat. We gotta get away from the barn before the men show up."

The group retreated, but Sacred with his rash remained between the teammates and Theo. He swirled a switchblade. Step by step, Theo got separated from the group.

The Mirrorgnost pumped V toward the water bottle in his bag to ready Sliver for a blinding maneuver.

"Can you take that back?" Sacred asked, nodding at his rash-y arms. "Jesus, this itches like mad."

Theo shook his head, never taking his eyes off the man. His team was fading into the fog. Nobody was noticing his absence, too busy watching out for Genesis.

He was about to call out to them when Sacred closed the switchblade, tossed it aside and raised both hands. "Can we talk?"

Theo stared. What?

Sacred seemed impatient and scratched his rash-covered scalp. "Gene's not going to do a thing while they have a hostage. I swear. Can we talk?"

"O-okay?" Theo said. "T-t-talk."

"I want out."

"You..."

Sacred scratched his arms. "Damnations. Can you make this stop? Seriously."

Theo recalled Glowy's influence and Sacred's skin cleared. If this was a delay tactic it was working. Theo didn't even know where his friends were at this point.

Sacred's demeanor collapsed from cocky to pathetic.

"What you did to Euch..." The Redeemer shivered. "That soul-gasm thing, it made him confide in me. We all want out. I mean, our parents are hecking crazy, right? I've been- Master Adam, grandfather, he's too stupid to monitor our internet use properly so I've researched and- Listen, I've been an atheist since I was fifteen but the devils are real. They're flipping real. You know it. And I signed a pact with arch angel Gabriel. How am I supposed to just fricking leave?"

"You know n-nothing bad is going to happen if you say `fuck', right?"

Sacred gave him an `are you serious' look. "I have leverage. We're hunting the same thing, pretty sure. And I know more."

Theo forced his tense shoulders down. "Damn, okay. I wasn't really looking to feel sorry for you. Your `leverage' will be appreciated. If we get back to my friends, you can explain yourself."

A deep sigh and a moment of silence. "Okay. This way." Sacred walked off and picked up his dropped knife as he passed it. "You coming?"

Theo hurried after the suddenly bossy hunk.

Sacred led them straight to Keith, Fulin and Coralline, who'd joined up with Godrick and Dawn. He gestured Theo to go ahead.

"Theo!" Fulin said and hurried over. "I was about to go looking for- Watch out!"

Theo pushed against Fulin's pecs. "Stop. He's here to talk."

Sacred emerged from the fog, glanced around the quiet group and took a deep breath.

"We kids want out. All three. I think Eucharist needs meds. Or therapy or both. Has for a while. But that's a no-go with his parents. And Liturgy is... deeply unhappy. Everything she sees is tainted and perverted and she can't even eat right anymore."

"Damn," Coralline mumbled.

Fulin relented. "He's honest. Doesn't mean he's speaking for the other second gens but he's honest."

Sacred squinted at the Primal, then absentmindedly tapped his forehead. "You're a banshee? Changeling?"

Fulin shrugged. "Names we've been called in other places. Keep being honest."

"We're a cult, right?" Sacred asked. "I was trying to leave once. There's resources for that. But none for- Demons are real and I promised the archangel Gabriel to fight them."

Keith stepped in. "Back up. You what?"

"When my parents took me to Rapture's chapel, I was thirteen. I thought it was going to be a boring trip with lots of praying. And then an angel descended and made a contract with me to hunt demons. That was real, right? I didn't make that up."

Theo recalled the dossier. Sacred's older sister, Rapture, had been haunted by a demon and set fire to a chapel, dying in the process. The Smith family's senior generation had become Redeemers then or shortly after.

"We call it the Pact Maker," Keith said. "Generic name because it takes so many forms. It didn't say it was an arch angel, right?"

"Not that I recall."

"Your parents are a little gullible and so was thirteen year old you. That was no angel. But yes, you have been given the power to... contribute to the ecosystem. You're just bad at distinguishing the good and bad guys."

Godrick raised his hand. "Hey there, fellow Redeemer. I can show you the ropes. Make sure you hit only the nasty creatures that feed on people."

Sacred blinked heavily, swallowed and straightened. "I'd like that."

###

Team delta-2 and the allied Redeemers Godrick and Dawn were back at the barn office, where the alpha had torn an escape for them.

According to Sacred, the building had been a whole labyrinth when his family had investigated the day before, which had been a slog to get through, suggesting an abandoned sanctuary. Even now the place wasn't fully done contracting back to its earthy proportions.

"We can assume it was a powerful Outsider," Keith said. "Either well fed or bound by someone even greater and made to exert itself. The fact it's still kinda Vestige-y like that apartment full of dream wisps suggests, uh... something?"

"We might find more clues," Dawn said. "Back in you go. Or just us superhumans, if you're not feeling it. You're the junior team."

"I'd have a look," Keith said. "Keeping in touch with Juniper, Cor?"

Fulin laid his hand on Theo's shoulder. "Boyfriend, are you going in?"

The Mirrorgnost – the title was growing on him – half-shrugged. "I don't feel useful. Let's stand guard at the hole you rammed."

"Phrasing," Godrick said. "Tank can be your personal rearguard another day."

Theo gestured. "No really, he slammed his body through- I'm just making it worse, huh?"

Godrick's raven familiar Rosamunde broke through the fog. "Badass hunk incoming."

Sacred practically flew at them with his ranger powers. He held a small, black note book. "Here's what we found in there. A schedule, all encrypted with abbreviations. I've made sure my family looks elsewhere for now but it would be better if I can have that back."

Coralline started photographing the pages.

Theo couldn't make sense of the random abbreviations but one date in September was clearly marked as extra important, the events getting denser leading up to it, a red underline on this one day alone.

"Fuck me."

"Gladly," Fulin mumbled, as if automatic.

Theo pointed. "That's the day I overslept so hard. Hours and hours, through every alarm. I had off work or my life would have been over. That had to be a dream wisp."

"Possible," Keith said, now climbing after the friendly Redeemer duo into the barn office. "Now I'm wondering if we'd find a citywide wave of oversleeping that night. Maybe we should even check across the whole state."

"That's what woke my powers," Theo said. "The Watcher showed up that day. Birds on my windowsill, eyes on magazine covers following me, reflection where there aren't people. He got subtler after and I was too groggy to think. I didn't make the connection until now."

Sacred stood close, as if he already belonged to the group. "That's the Guiding Eye of my Guardian Angel? Not that I believe- Gene just called it that and she's the only ranger I knew till today. It helps us prophesize events."

"We call it the Watcher, yeah," Theo said.

"Uh, guys?" Keith said, inside the barn. "Something's showing up on Mel's radar."

"Who's Mel?" Sacred asked.

Theo looked into the noosphere as he spoke, to check if the hunk was going to freak out. "An allied Outsider entwined with Keith. Not a demon."

Sacred raised his hands. "I'm not an idiot, okay? Willing to learn."

Keith waved from the hole. "Seriously, Cor, take a peak and report."

Coralline stepped up to the hole. "Tank, can you give me a lift?"

"Gladly, my dainty lady."

"Can you do it without the sexism?"

"Hehe. One demand at a time, princess."

Theo huffed a laugh. "I'll housebreak him one day."

They all climbed in, squeezing into the office where the desk was still blocking the door, lit by naked bulbs.

There weren't fractures in reality this time but blurry bubbles, shapelessly wobbling and drifting. Coralline sent her report while the others counted. The wobbles were growing in number – and in size.

"Might be time to leave," Keith said.

Something clanked.

A man had appeared at the exit hole, tall, massive, clad in a mix of knight armor and samurai gear. He held a spear. His eyes behind the helmet's grate gleamed.

"Death to our enemies."

The unreality blobs took over, filling the room like massive soap bubbles until they touched the walls.

"War archon or something," Keith warned and Melisandre slipped out of his body as a woman made of night, rolling out dark clouds to block the enemy's sight.

Wisps trailed through the air.

"Demon?" Dawn asked, her crossbow raised.

"Does it matter?" Keith said. "It's a muse and it's gonna kill us."

"Might be protecting this place," Godrick said. "Hey you incarnation of war or battle or what have you. Would you let us leave after some show combat?"

The war archon barreled through the dark clouds. "Death upon intruders."

Godrick went in, opening with a flying kick.

Fulin had been pulling Theo and Coralline to the blocked door but the space behind it had turned into a labyrinth – or turned back into one if Sacred was right.

The path beyond the desk branched into two, then each branched again, twisting and turning up or down. They had to ask Sacred for his experience and ranger senses.

Where had he- The youngest Redeemer in the group was clutching his head and grimaced in horror.

"Oh shit," Theo said and looked at his own lapel. His powered sigil, inspired by mock alchemical circles, was warding off dream wisps that brushed against him. Sacred had no such protections.

Theo pulled a spare seal from his pockets and slapped the paper on Sacred's head. A wisp got pushed out.

"The frick?"

"Nightmare," Theo said. "D-do you know how seals work? How to power them?"

"Uh, no."

Theo tried to pin the strip to a button on the man's leather jacket. "Just keep this here and don't go too far. Beat up the war archon if you can."

Rosamunde the bird had transformed into a whip of braided barbed wire, sparking around the archon's armor. Dawn had managed to lodge a bolt in the enemy muse's face plate but that didn't slow the creature down.

"Demiplane," Keith yelled. The office completed its magical transformation. Unreality made way for a new space.

It resembled in proportion what the original wooden church might have looked like, with arching windows of stained glass along the sides, self-illuminating. At the other end was a complex rosette window and before it a stone slab like an altar, three humans in everyday clothes draped over it.

The humans stirred.

Fulin had joined the fight against the war archon, letting Weidong snap from his chest to try and rip armor of the being while Godrick and his familiar in whip-form kept the enemy's attention. Xiang in Fulin's sneakers kept streaking ice onto the floor, forcing the samurai-knight to walk slowly and carefully.

Dawn joined Theo and the others. "My bolts aren't doing a thing. Any bright ideas?"

Keith looked around. "This doesn't seem like a demiplane of combat. He's just a guardian but not the muse or god that made this sanctuary. If we can figure out who or what... Church, worship, harmony, glass, color, veneration itself?"

Theo pulled his inhabited water bottle from his bag. Maybe Sliver was going to be useful. He fed an iota of V into the glass wisp.

The three humans at the altar rose with poses that seemed too bent to be comfortable. Low moans, shambling steps. Two men, one woman.

The trio transformed.

"Possession," Keith said. "And I think they're corpses, not people."

"I hope so," Dawn said. "Makes this easier."

She fired into one man's thigh and he was pulled back by the empowered impact.

Theo pulled out a crumpled piece of paper and started drawing a seal, as elaborate as he could make it under time pressure. He was aware that the ambient nightmare wisps were still slowly chipping away at his anti-dream seals. He'd have to decide where to put his V.

The shot guy rose on a stiff leg and transformed. Glittering shards pushed out of his skin, jewels and gold and pearls, forming huge necklaces, bracelets and so on. A crown buried out of his head.

"Jewelry jinn," Keith said. "Better not get cut." He pushed Coralline behind himself and dark fog seemed from his legs, rising around them. "The others might just be sprites, so- Fuck, they're also muses."

The other man grew strips of fur and cat ears. Small, sharp teeth dug through his lips. He hunched over, not quite on all fours. The woman's limbs burst into bundles of golden grain. A scythe formed in her wheat-grasp.

"Uh, cat fae?" Coralline guessed. "Would it be afraid of Weidong?"

Keith hummed. "And... a field fae? Harvest? Wheat? A nature dryad? That would make sense for the location. She might be the sanctuary keeper, but it's not super barn-like in here."

The jewel jinn was the only one interested in closing in. He came fast. Theo tossed his hastily drawn seal at the ground and the possessed corpse slithered aside. Darkness wafted up.

Dawn had loaded a bolt and aimed at the feline zombie. The cat fae got a shot to the head and crumbled. It rose again, but with a lack of motor control. The possessor couldn't entirely work around the brain damage.

"Keith, give us cover," Theo said and tapped his bracelet. Echo sprite Melody eagerly hoovered the V the blond shaman provided.

Their group ducked through Melisandre's cover, leaving behind an echo – a static image of themselves, slowly fading. It was enough to confuse cat-man and wheat-lady until Theo, Dawn, Keith, Coralline and Sacred made it to the other side of the room.

"We could enter the labyrinth," Sacred said. "But if we get cornered in a dead end we're scrambled."

"You guys can't even say screwed?"

Theo only got a shrug in response.

The jewelry jinn slapped the echoes away and scanned the room. The field dryad leaked locusts from her... everything. The cat fae had given up on piloting the corpse like a human and pulled its joints like a marionette.

Sacred went in. Rangers weren't made to fight but his enhanced agility and endurance kept him safe while he pummeled the possession victims with regular human strength. Keith was jiggling his keys, distracting the enemies as if he were doing something much more impressive.

The battle against the war archon remained a stalemate, the iced floor keeping the creature slow but the armor barely chinking.

Theo had no illusions about being useful in a fight. He was an artist and making new seals took time.

There was premade art, though. The "church windows". Could he repurpose one as a vessel to seal one of the Ghoul's possessing muses?

A long shot but he looked around and- The windows' designs were largely abstract shapes and colors, not like a real church would look like, at least not a little one in the middle of farmland. Had they been heavily reshaped when pulled into a demiplane? Where they... custom?

"Cor," Theo said. "Does that window look like if Mondrian painted a cat?"

"Fucking what?" Coralline said with exhausted bewilderment.

"And those splotches are a stalk of grain and I guess the one with sharp angles could be jewels."

Coralline's eyes went wide. "Guys! The Ghouls are puppets. The windows are the vessels. Dawn, shoot them."

Theo had made it close to the possible "jewel" design window. Runic patterns and spirals had been etched into the glass, subtle and random. Atlas glyphs to invite Outsiders.

He gave the window an untrained kick which accomplished nothing. The glass was strengthened by the jinn that claimed it as a home from which to take over corpses.

Dawn extracted herself from the management of the undead and loaded a glyph covered bolt. "Sparrow Two, give me all you've got."

Theo hurried away, unsure if he was safer near the three zombies chasing Sacred or the chipped knight slipping on Fulin's trail under Godrick's whip snaps.

He retreated to the giant rosette behind the altar.

The bolt cracked the window, smears leaking out like hot air. The jewel jinn's victim collapsed, the crown deflating into its skull.

Godrick traded positions with Sacred and took a superhuman leap onto the zombie's back, a seal ready. "Fucking die!"

The jittering feline and the wheat undead closed in but Godrick backflipped out of reach.

While more windows shattered, Theo and Coralline both examined the rosette.

"It's a vessel, too," Theo said. "But not one we need to worry about, right?"

The illuminated art piece was ringed by glyphs but only wisps inhabited them, passing through the etchings, slowly draining them of magical meaning. It was where all those dream wisps lived when they weren't needed - being part of the plane's defense system.

"No, we do," Coralline said and stepped back. "You're just seeing the frame. The whole giant window is meant to be a vessel. See those glyphs? They're so dense with meaning I can barely read them but..."

"It's supposed to house a god," Theo said. "Voluntarily? Or capture it?"

"Dunno," Coralline said. "Keith! We found the god vessel."

"Smash it!" the Asian shaman shouted back and came jogging. The walking corpses were down.

A bolt came flying but was stopped by the dream wisps sucking the motion out of it.

Theo shook his bottle. "Ah, Sliver? Can you give it a go? From glass to glass?"

The bound wisp flickered as light did underwater and transferred itself into the rosette. It couldn't find purchase among the interfering defender wisps.

"We're in but we need power," Theo said.

Rosamunde perched on the altar, back in crow form. "I'm drained, as is Dawn. Godrick pulled his own Vigor for the last seal."

Keith slithered up next to them. "Mel thinks she can do it but I really have to level up the Veneration for a while. Step aside."

The semi-possessed man stood with arms spread, legs firmly planted, eyes closed.

The window started cracking, then shattered. Shards rained over Keith and shattered further to sand raining past him.

The whole demiplane ruptured. Church-barn walls bent and creaked. The foggy fields outside became visible through the holes where windows had been.

Figures appeared behind the rosette's jagged remains. Brighter and brighter light backlit them.

"They're making an exit," a woman outside shouted. "Now."

"On it," answered a man.

A giant snake of pure sunlight poured into the demiplane. Fino, the roaming muse of Hierarch Greyson. It focused its radiance on the war archon. All ice underneath the creature evaporated instantly, steam climbing up its armor.

Police officer Knox Porter and delta team mentor Juniper Upatham reached through the window. "Come on. Out of there."

Theo helped Coralline climb, then was hoisted up by Fulin who'd skated over within a second. Sacred pulled Godrick along.

They all stumbled across rugged, upturned earth in fog that had cleared slightly since they'd gotten trapped.

Fino was last to leave the demiplane and curled around the Sunlock Greyson White. The female Hierarch Brielle Boyd was tending to the exhausted Godrick, Rosamunde fussing in his lap.

Juniper did a headcount and talked into his phone.

Theo felt his water bottle jiggle. Sliver was back.

The barn crumbed slightly – a wall and half the roof sagging. Fairly unspectacular. Nothing hinted at the demiplane they had just damaged, or destroyed.

Sacred stood awkwardly at the rim of their group, hands on his knees, panting.

Knox hummed his way. "Now who might you be?"

###

Juniper drove them back into town. The Hierarchs wanted to talk to them some more but Paris had insisted on being with Theo after having nearly lost his boyfriend to a pocket dimension full of demons, Cain was obviously not going to be separated from them, Fulin insisted on being Theo's bodyguard and the van's remaining seat was claimed by Keith, riding shotgun.

Theo sat in the middle back seat, snuggling Cain's slim frame while Fulin's legs were pushing into his.

"Binding a god is crazy," Keith said. "I hope shattering their special vessel is setting them seriously back."

"Must have," Juniper said. "But we don't know their time table or if they have spares. I think the hierarchs are calling Washington for help. A god doesn't stay in a vessel forever. They have to have some goal."

"Like what?" Fulin asked.

Keith twisted around toward them. "Make all of Harpersfield fall asleep for a day? Or invade the dreams all over Concordia for a few weeks? Or just very specific dreams, of people they want to influence or harm."

"Or," Paris said, "that god of dreams is just easy to feed. People sleep, you know. Maybe it's easy to Venerate it on a grand scale, then trade for power to do anything a god can do."

"Spooky," Cain said, monotone.

"Apropos," Keith said. "I mean apropos Washington', not apropos spooky', but that, too, I guess. Some of the big names are really interested in a stable corpse vessel with a fairly human mind and forbidden knowledge of voidzones."

Theo frowned. "That corpse vessel has a name."

"And it's Cain," said the boy in question, his affect making it impossible to tell if he was making fun of Theo, Keith, neither or both.

"Just warning," Keith said. "Necromancy isn't popular, at least not in practice. But neither is dying if you don't have to."

Cain shrugged. "I go back and forth thinking of myself as having died once and thinking of pre-zombie Cain as a different person who's dead. More the latter since I stopped talking to my parents."

"Right," Theo said. "We were going to work on that estranged parent thing." He glanced out the window at the random suburb they were passing, meeting the ethereal eyes of the Watcher, glinting in the glass. "Yeah... I'm one to talk."

After five seconds of pondering, Fulin laid his hand on Theo's thigh and Cain stirred in his arms, meeting his eyes.

Paris looked on with a grin. "We'll be a happy, post-modern family. One top, one bottom, their punk zombie kid and an overgrown dog."

Fulin faked a growl.

Paris shook his head. "Bottom, hand me the spray bottle. Our mutt is acting out."

"The bottom has a name," Theo said.

"And it's not Cain," Cain contributed flatly.

Paris sank into his seat with a chuckle. "This isn't the family I thought I wanted but fuck me do I want it."

"Oh," Fulin made. "I meant to ask, my prince. Am I invited tomorrow when business gets real?"

Paris hummed. "I mean, we were going to do it all subtle since it's a bit, uh, controversial and done mostly out of necessity."

"Come on," Theo said. "He's going to be part of that family and you know it, even if you keep pretending he's your nemesis."

Keith twisted in his seat. "Wait! Wait wait wait. The big thing is happening tomorrow already?"

Paris grabbed Theo's hand with a wide grin. "Matrimony so god willing. Slavery otherwise."

"Explain?" Juniper demanded and turned the stereo down.

Paris sighed and dropped Theo's hand. "Now I feel like we should have kept them in the loop."

Theo shrugged. "You're not used to being spontaneous. Can't blame you."

Fulin huffed. "The mutt can."