The Beta
Chapter 1- Discoveries
Xak was sitting on the edge of the couch in the man he and his friends called Pawpaw, aka Alpha Richard's, office; his knees bouncing up and down, giving off an unmistakable air of extreme nervousness. His auburn hair was slightly messed up from him running his hand through it every few minutes and his hazel eyes looked worried and almost scared. His average sized body, 5'09"/150, was almost dwarfed by that of the blonde haired, blue eyes man next to him. Chris lounged confidentially, his arm draped along the back of the couch behind Xak's shoulders. He was trying to ease his best friend back into the couch to get him to relax a little bit. Seated behind a huge wooden desk looking like an older version of Chris, only slightly taller, Richard was in his oversized chair, his face completely unreadable. Xak couldn't tell if he was happy, angry, sad, or whatever, the man literally had the best damn poker face ever seen. Across from Richard, Xena, who as a child was obsessed with the show Xena: Warrior Princess and now ironically looked like Lucy Lawless standing at 5'10" weighing about 150 pounds with black hair and green eyes, appeared as if she were casually relaxing, just hanging out with her brother Xak and their best friends. However, if anyone present were to closely follow her eyes, they would notice the constant darting motions they did around the room as she tracked every move everybody made, ensuring she knew the exact location of every person present. Leaning against the wall opposite Xak and Chris, Gary, Chris' cousin but couldn't tell by looking, wore a kind of knowing smirk that seemed to say, you guys are some deep shit now. Gary was just about the opposite of Chris in appearance, where Chris had blonde hair, Gary's was mousy brown, Chris had electric blue eyes compared to Gary's that were so dark brown, they appeared black at times. Their fathers had been identical twins; Chris favoring them. Xak's dad told them once that Gary looked like the male version of his mother; Mike had been friends with the twins, so naturally knew Gary's mother.
At the moment though, they were all waiting for Mike to arrive. Since he was Richard's Beta, he had been working on negotiations with the Beta of a pack from north of Dallas, some sort of treaty. He wouldn't tell anyone initially what the terms of the treaty were, he would simply say that he wanted to make sure every detail was ironed out before letting them know but that it would greatly benefit their pack if everything worked out. Then, two days earlier, Mike came to the group of young adults and said that they needed to leave in two days and go to Denton. There they were going to meet Xena's new husband who he expected her to stay with since he was going to be the next Alpha, as well as Chris' new wife, who they would be returning with. He left before anyone could make an argument against him. The group was dumbfounded. This was not going to be a fun meeting for Mike, he was about to be thoroughly pissed the fuck off. His world, as he knew it, was about to collapse and Xak was already playing out every possible reaction scenario possible.
Xak often joked, in all seriousness, that he tended to over analyze the fact that he over analyzed everything. His brain was constantly going. A never ending stream of thoughts played in his head, even while sleeping. The older he got, the harder it became for him to function. Richard finally noticed, Xak was always calm and focused when Chris was near. Remove Chris from the equation, and Xak would either clam-up and eventually shut-down staring blankly into space or throw the mother of all temper-tantrums, even going as far as falling on the floor literally kicking and screaming. Return Chris, and it was as if nothing had happened. During these separations, Chris would go into a blind rage and start kicking and hitting anything he could get close to, or he would sit in the corner and rock back and forth, eventually banging his head against the wall. So Chris focused Xak while Xak calmed Chris. Richard figured that neither was going to be very successful if the other wasn't there to help.
When Chris was supposed to start school, Richard was faced with either holding Chris back a year until Xak could join him, homeschooling, or somehow getting Xak in school one year early. Richard met with the school's principal and somehow convinced that man to allow Xak to take a placement exam to see if he was ready for school. Thank the gods, Xak passed with flying colors, and would have been able to begin school as a second grader. It was enough for Richard and Mike to get Xak into the same kindergarten class as Chris. About this time, Richard notice one other little snafu. Gary's borderline obsession and intense jealousy towards Xak and Chris. In Gary's thinking, it should be him with Chris all the time, because they were practically twins since Pawpaw was raising them and their birthdays were so close together. So what if Chris spent just as much time at Mike's as he did at home, Pawpaw was still his legal guardian and that made Chris his brother, not Xak's. That was the argument presented to a broken-hearted Richard from his crying four-year-old grandson one night.
Interestingly enough, it was Xena that helped talk Gary down and soothed the young boy simply telling him, "Chris and Xak need each other, just like I need you to be my best friend." Gary and Xena were pretty much inseparable after that, but never as close as Chris and Xak. Richard thought Xena might have an idea about Chris and Xak's real meaning to each other, even if she didn't fully understand it.
Mike, however, never seemed to catch on to what was happening or refused to accept it. He noticed these behaviors, but could never admit to himself nor anyone else what they possibly meant. He was a small-town Texas boy and of the firm mindset that there was no fucking way two men could be fated for each other. It just wasn't natural. After hearing this, for the first time, Richard regretted not telling Mike the whole truth about his relationship with Nicolas. Maybe if Richard had been honest when Mike was younger, and the twins and Sarah were still alive to help influence their friend, they could have convinced Mike that two men could in fact love each other and be true mates. Now, with lies built upon lies, Richard thought it was too late, he would just have to protect the pups when the time came and Mike discovered the truth that was in right in front of his face. He hoped it wouldn't turn out too bad, but he had this feeling that when Mike found out, blood would be shed.
So, over the years, Richard watch the four young pups grow and mature, individually and as a group. When Xak as eleven and Chris was twelve, something changed in both of them. The way they interacted with the other became more physical and mental. They also started hanging out with Xena and Gary less and less, spending hour upon hour with just the two of them exploring the woods and the areas around the pack lands. They had already spent enough time together that their scents were indistinguishable from the other. Richard was thankful for that fact and thought he would be even more thankful in the future if what he suspected ended up being fact. He knew then he had to protect their secret as much as he protected his own.
Richard was jarred from his thoughts, when he heard a knock on the office door, and Trystan, his twenty-five-year-old secretary stuck in her head and announced to no one in particular, "Umm, Beta Mike is here." The tension in the room elevated.
"Thank you, Trystan, please send him on back here," Richard smiled.
Mike entered the office and looked at what was before him and asked, "What the fuck is going here? Why are the four of y'all here and not on your way up to Denton? Xena had a husband to meet and Chris has a wife to pick up. I have spent too many fucking months negotiating this treaty with that pack for y'all to fuck it up now. It would give us an advantage against Nicolas, Justin, and Toby. Y'all need to get the fuck out of here and be on your way." His anger was palpable. He turned to Richard looking for support and said, "Aren't you going to tell them to get going? I thought you wanted the help the Denton pack can provide."
Surprisingly, Richard responded, "They're not going anywhere Mike. If you had told me what you were planning, I would have told you not to waste your time. Please have seat so we can discuss this."
"Richard," Mike answered tensely but still took a seat in the offered chair next to Xena, "there is no discussion to be had. The Denton pack is expecting them tonight, so they need to be there tonight. Otherwise, not only do I look like a complete and total ass, it will reflect on your reputation, which is far from shiny, as well as Chris' future reputation once he takes over as Alpha. Xena is gaining a powerful husband, I'm happy for her, this will be a good match. Chris' future wife is young, only nineteen as well, which gives them many years to breed some pups. None of them have to get married immediately, it's in the treaty that they have up to three years for that to happen, that gives everybody a chance to get know each other. Xak needs to be there to meet their future Beta, so he knows who he'll be dealing with since he is going to be Chris' Beta." Gary had been asking Chris since they were sixteen years old if he could be the Beta. Chris would deflect the questions by saying that he had no clue who was going to be what in the pack once he took over, they had plenty of time to consider all possibilities and make a decision later. Well, that was the answer Xak told him to tell when Chris asked what he was supposed to do. That answer actually answered the question for Chris and he decided that Xak was a better choice than Gary to fill that position, he didn't want to hurt Gary's feelings, he loved his cousin so, he hadn't told Gary yet.
Gary's smirk fell and he said, "But, I was supposed to be your Beta. I'm your fucking brother practically, what the fuck is he to you? There's no blood relation. You owe it to me as your blood. Pawpaw, please tell him."
Chris' casual façade faded away as he stood and he crossed the room in an instant, pinning Gary against the wall by his neck, choking him, and said, "My brother? What the fucking hell? You're my cousin, and just because Pawpaw adopted us and raised us, that doesn't entitle you to a goddamned thing. Mike raised me just as much as Pawpaw did. No offense Pawpaw. So does that make Xak just as much of a brother as you? As far as what Xak is to me? He's my mate."
The look on Gary's face was beyond satisfaction. Even though he was being held against the wall and being choked, the smile that came on his face was one of triumph, almost like he had just got the only thing in the world that would've made him happy. Chris thought to himself, "The fucker knew, he goaded me into admitting this in front of Mike. How the fuck did he figure this out?"
Before he could voice these questions, Chris heard a roar from Mike, followed by a cry from Xak. Mike's clothing flew from his body and where a human had been standing a few seconds earlier, a silver/gray wolf crouched, snarling at Xak. Richard stood so fast, his chair flew into to wall behind him. He said in his most commanding tone of voice, infused with his will, "Mike, shift back immediately and calm down so that we can all discuss this, your Alpha commands it."
Under normal circumstances, a naked Mike would be standing in the middle of the office with his head slightly bowed in submission and guilt. However, these circumstances were far from normal. So, the wolf still was snarling at Xak with saliva dripping from the long canines, looking ready to pounce. Richard took a breath and with a little more willpower added and a firmer tone, he tried again. "Michael Shannon Johnson, you WILL shift back now and you WILL calmly sit and discuss this, your Alpha commands it."
Disobeying a direct Alpha Command takes extreme willpower and is considered a direct challenge again the Alpha. The Alpha can accep the challenge, kick the offender out of the pack, or if there in an enforcer nearby, do nothing and allow them to take care of the situation. Before anyone could say another word, Chris moved to protectively stand in front of Xak. At that moment, as Mike began his leap to attack his son, a black wolf clamped her powerful jaws on the neck of her father's wolf forcing him to the ground. Richard said, "Submit now." Still, Mike struggled to get up. Richard flicked his eyes to the black wolf and slightly nodded to her. She snapped her head back and with a sickening crack his neck broke and his throat was ripped away from his body. Mike fell to the floor dead.
Chris turned to Xak and sat next to him. He grabbed his mate and held onto him as tight as he could. He allowed his smaller framed auburn-headed boyfriend to cry his hazel eyes out till they were dry. During this time, Xena shifted back, went to the sink to clean her face, and changed into the clothes stashed in her backpack for just such an occasion. She went through the motions almost automatically, like she was in shock. Richard came over to her, pulled her into a hug and said, "You did what you had to do as an enforcer. You had your orders from your Alpha, this is not your fault. All fault lies on him and me, you only did as you were instructed like a great enforcer always does."
After hearing that, Xak looked up and said, "Pawpaw's right, it is my fault." He pulled away from Chris and ran out the door.
Chris looked up at the horror struck face of his grandfather and asked, "How could you say that? He had nothing to do with this."
Richard cut him off saying, "Do you really think I was talking about him? I was referring to Mike when I told her to place the blame somewhere. I would never do anything or say anything to intentionally hurt any of y'all. The four of y'all are my world. Now, why would he think I would accuse him? Why does he think this is his fault?"
Xena, coming out of her trance, responded in her normal sarcastic tone, "Oh, because you know Pawpaw, you do kind of have a reputation for being a major douchebag and asshole, sir. But, I think there is a story as to why he blames himself. I think I know what it is too, but it's not my place to speculate."
"Chris, send him a message through your mental link telling him to come back now, I wasn't blaming him when I said that, tell him I was trying to console Xena, she had just killed her own father, I knew she was going to be upset if I didn't do something immediately. I would never intentionally hurt him, so please come back to the office," Richard begged.
Chris had an almost believable surprised/questioning look and asked in his most confident tone, "What do you mean mental link? Why would I have a link with Xak? Only mated couples have that link."
Richard looked at him and said, "Cut the bullshit boy and get your mate back here NOW. Please." He then picked up his office phone and called for someone to come remove Mike's body, which they quickly did.
To say Chris was surprised that his grandfather knew he and Xak were mates would be an understatement. Xena didn't seem surprised by either the fact that Xak was his mate nor that Richard knew. Gary had lost his smile, he was upset that things had gotten this out of hand. He knew what he was doing when he got Chris to admit the truth in front of Mike. He had expected Mike to get upset, yes, but he didn't think it would go that far. He never intended for Mike to die. He thought he was doing everyone a favor, giving the group the chance to stay together. He had accepted that Xak would be the Beta two years ago when they were seventeen and Xak was sixteen. It was the day he saw Chris and Xak in the woods having sex.
He had been shot-down by Chris once again, and was upset, so he decided that he needed to go for a run. He was in his wolf form, running through the woods when he caught the scent of Chris and Xak. He decided to follow them and finally confront Chris and demand an answer once and for all. He shifted back to human and approached the clearing quietly. He saw Xak on his hands knees naked, his head thrown back with his eyes closed. Behind him, on his knees, Chris was thrusting his cock in and out of Xak's ass. Chris had to be at least eight and half inches long and not quite as thick as a Coke can, but almost there. Xak was moaning, the look on his was one of total bliss. He was begging Chris to fuck him harder and faster. Chris grabbed Xak by his hair and pulled his head back and kissed him hard. Speaking of hard, Gary was. He felt bad for watching his cousin fuck his friend, both of whom he considered more like brother's than anything since they were raised together, but he couldn't look away. He grabbed his own six and half inch cock, which he had always been happy with but now compared to what Chris was working with looked more like a Lil' Smokey Sausage than his kielbasa, and stroked it. He couldn't help himself. He watched as Chris slammed into Xak's nice bubble butt, eliciting a moan with evert thrust. He watched as Chris pulled out of Xak and turned him over onto his back and slide right back in. He said, "I'm fucking close and I know you are too. I want to see your face when you cum." Next thing Gary knew he was silently shooting his own load on the ground while Chris grabbed Xak's six and half inch tool and began stroking him. It didn't take long for Xak to yell out and shoot his load, covering his stomach and some shooting high enough to land on Chris' chest. As Xak was shooting, Gary guessed his ass clamped down on Chris' cock, because suddenly he stopped the in-and-out motion, slid in to the hilt and let out a moan that could probably be heard back at the pack village. As quietly as he could, Gary back-stepped into the woods and shifted immediately and ran. He thought he heard Xak ask Chris if he had heard anything and Chris respond with a `huh?'
When Gary got back to the pack village, he had to talk to someone. Xena found him and saw the look on his face, which was shock mixed with some guilt and sadness. She asked him if everything was okay, and he responded, "Yeah, I just figured out that I will never be the Beta."
Xena shocked Gary by stating, "Oh, so you know that Chris and Xak are `Chris and Xak'?"
He looked at her and said, "Yeah, I just saw them fucking in the woods, and umm, nevermind. How long have you known?"
"Since they were too young to know that the penis was for anything other than pissing, I've always known, I just didn't know exactly what I knew till later. Now, I don't need to worry about you telling our dad, do I?" she asked.
Gary said, "No, I don't want anyone to get in trouble or upset."
She pulled him into a hug and said, "If dad ever found out that they were mates, I promise somebody would end up dead. I'm sorry you won't be the Beta, but you're still my best friend and I love you no matter what."
She then licked his face to which he responded, "EWWW, isn't it enough that I had to see what I saw? That image will haunt me forever; I don't need your germs on me too."
She laughed and said, "Aww, worried I might make you straight? Even though I think you liked it a little."
"How how how how did you know?" he stammered out.
"Takes one to know one. But I'll take either or, I'm not picky."
"Me neither, not really," he bashfully responded. Then looked up at her with a sheepish smile and asked, "Do you want to go out somewhere sometime? Like a date or something?"
She looked him straight in the eye and said, "I love you Gary, but I promise you that if we were to ever go out or anything, our friendship would be destroyed. I love you too much to lose what we have now, please don't be too upset with me."
He shrugged and said, "I'm not, I could never be upset with my bestie. Besides, you're not really my type, I have taste you know."
She showed him he was number one with a hand gesture and said, "Fuck off, you couldn't handle what I'm packing. If I fucked you with my strap on, you'd be walking funny for a week, I bet it's bigger than what Chris probably has. I wouldn't know though; I haven't seen it."
He mumbled, "Fucking kielbasa." That sent both of them into hysterics, and Gary realized at that moment that Xena truly was his best friend, and he couldn't lose her ever. Chris also gained the private nickname of kielbasa, though they never called him that to his face.
Back in the office, Chris closed his and reopened them immediately when the office door flew open and Xak walked back into the room. Xak's eyes immediately found Chris' and found love and support there. Next, he met those of his sister and saw the concern and need to protect that was always present with Xena. Then they met the gaze of his, umm well, Gary was an enigma to him. There were times when he felt like Gary was almost like his brother but then, out of nowhere, he would go out of his way to ignore Xak, they could go months without saying more than five words to each other. However, Xak knew that he would do just about anything for Gary, the same he would for Xena and Chris, but he wondered if Gary would return the favor. Right now what he saw in Gary's eyes, broke his heart. They were full of regret, shame, and guilt making Xak wonder what would make him feel that way. Finally, he turned towards his Alpha and said, "Please, Alpha Richard, sir, don't be mad at Chris. I have no claim to"
He was cut off by Richard's hand covering his mouth. Richard looked into the young man's eyes and said, "Whatever you do, please DO NOT finish that statement. If you love Chris, do not finish what you were about to say. And what is with that `Alpha Richard' bullshit? I thought I was still your Pawpaw." Blinding tears filled the young man's eyes and Xak simply nodded and Richard dropped his hand. He then continued, "I think it's past time for the five of us to talk. There are some things y'all need to know, things I need to confess. But first, I want to know why you reacted like that, you should have known I was not referring to you when I said that."
Xak looked at Chris questioningly, and the other shrugged his shoulders and said, "You can tell them if you want, but you know I think what you're about to say is total and complete bullshit, but do what you want."
"In that case," Xak started, taking a deep breath and continued, "Chris and I used to play a game, one of our favorites, we called it Your Alpha Commands It.' Basically, he would tell me to do something, pretending he was the Alpha. In the beginning, it was innocent enough. Clean my room, your Alpha Commands it.' Do my homework, your Alpha Commands it.' Just stupid shit like that, not really harming anyone. Now, I know what you're thinking, but no, he never pretended to give me a command to do anything physical to him nor him to me. One day when I was about eleven and a half, just entering puberty compared to Chris was twelve and then some already well on his way through that journey, and I had questions. I was too embarrassed to ask my dad, so I went to him. I asked him if his dick ever got hard, and what he would do about it. Actually, my exact words were, Does your thingy get hard sometimes and do you ever rub on it when it does?' He turned a shade of red that I had never seen him wear before and certainly haven't seen it since.
"He actually stuttered when he said, `Umm ye ye yeah, wh wh why do you wanna know?' The confident, borderline cocky personality the world sees today was definitely not there. The person I saw in front of me then was so vulnerable and scared, I almost laughed.
"I told him `I don't know, I was just curious, I mean I know what's going on in my body, I've read about it, but it's still scary. The books say that it's normal for guys to get hard and that it's also normal to masturbate, but I wanted to know for sure, make sure I'm not the only one doing it, and that I'm doing it correctly'
"He said, Ye yeah, I touch it sometimes when it gets hard...well, actually every chance I get to touch it I do, it feels really good.' His confidence was returning, the stuttering stopped, and he smirked when he continued, Want me to show you how to do it? I can help you out, and you can help me out.'
"I was the one that got nervous then. I asked, `Are we allowed to do stuff like that? I didn't think two boys were supposed to do stuff like that. Isn't that gay? My dad says being gay is wrong.' We all know how vocal dad could be sometimes about someone being gay.
"Chris said, Actually, I asked Pawpaw about what your dad was saying, and Pawpaw told me to ignore what Uncle Mike was saying and not to believe him, but not to say anything out loud against him.' Finally, after a few minutes, it didn't really take much convincing on his part, I gave in and we pulled our pants down and he showed me how he did it, he would play with mine and I would play with his. All we would do is just touch. This went on daily for a while. Then about six months later, just before my birthday, Chris asked me if he could put his mouth on mine. I figured, why not? We had already done this much, might as well do more, besides it felt really good for him to touch me and I enjoyed touching him. So, we started sucking each other off. After he came in my mouth and me in his, he looked at me and said, Wow, that was amazing, I want you to be my mate for life.'
"I said, `I can't be your mate, two guys can't be mates you know what my dad says. Playing around is fine, but if we were mates, everybody would know and my dad would kill me.'
"He said, "Remember what I told you Pawpaw said? He said not to believe your dad. I think Pawpaw's right.' Then, with that confident borderline cocky smirk that annoys the shit out of me to this day because I can't resist it, he said, `Besides, your Alpha Commands it.'
"There had been this feeling since he came in my mouth, it was kind of like an itch over my whole body. Not annoying, just weird. After he said your Alpha Commands it, it turned into this heat that made me think my insides were on fire. I looked at him and noticed his pupils were dilated, telling me he felt it too. I was on the verge of tears when I asked, `What was that? What did you do? Why did you say that?' I was freaking out, my brain going into overdrive. I started thinking, wondering, if Chris was next in line to be Alpha, maybe it was never really a game. Or maybe since I knew he was going to be my Alpha one day, what if me accepting that fact gave him the power of an Alpha over me? I had never said no to one of his commands when we were playing. What if we never realized it wasn't just a game. If I had challenged him once, would that have caused him to have to fight me? I wondered if I refused now, would that be considered a challenge? Chris was already bigger and stronger than I was, I had no hopes of winning a challenge. I felt trapped, but at the same time I knew that I loved him. I had always loved him but never that intensely. What Chris next though, I think sealed the deal for me."
"Fucking bullshit," Chris muttered from next to Xak, only to receive a glare from everyone.
"Meanwhile, back at the ranch, before I was rudely interrupted. Chris responded by saying, You will be my mate, your Alpha Commands it.' I was too scared to lose my best friend, that I just nodded and submitted, accepting that what I felt was real, but only because he made it that way. Over the next couple of years, we stuck to only oral and touching. The afternoon of my first shift was the first time we had sex, which only completed the bonding I think because later that night, when I heard Chris' voice in my head, Can you hear me? I've been waiting forever for this part.' I nearly jumped out of my skin. That's why I was so skittish right after my shift. Chris also told me that this was proof we were true mates. Of course, I reminded him that the link is there for imprinted mates as well. He then said at least it proves your dad is wrong and two guys can be mates. I have thought about this many, many times and the only conclusion I come to is that the reason we are mates is because I submitted to his will and accepted that he wanted me to love him, and I did. Because of me, my dad is dead now. He might have been a closed minded homophobe sometimes, but he raised Xena and me and practically Chris and Gary sometimes, with your help, he did the best he could."
Tears were rolling down Xak's face as he buried his head into Chris' side. Chris looked around the room and said, "I know that Xak is my true mate. I think I've always known. He refuses to believe me on this issue. I know he thinks he only loves me because I willed him to. The only time we fight about anything is when we start talking about this. He says he loves me and I believe him because I can see it in his eyes. He says he won't go against my command to be his mate; he doesn't want to challenge me; he says he knows he could never win against me physically, so why tempt fate and even try. I try telling him that I'm not the Alpha yet, and I wasn't then, so that `command' didn't mean a thing. He'll trump that by asking if I really want to find out if that's true or not, because if I do, it could possibly end with him challenging me and then where would that leave us? His arguments are somewhat logical, I guess. I know that I could never bring myself to hurt him in anyway. All I want to do is love him and take care of him. When I tell him that, he says he can take care of himself and that he knows he loves me but thinks it's only because his brain makes him believe it so that he doesn't end up challenging me."
Richard had tears in his eyes when he said, "I am so sorry, this is all my fault. I should have been honest with Mike from the beginning when he became Beta. Actually, I should have been honest before that. I could have prevented all of this."
Chris looked at his grandfather and asked, "What are you talking about Pawpaw? How is this your fault, when Gary is the one blame?" He turned to Gary and asked, "How did you know? How long have you known?"
Every eye in the room shifted to Gary. He sighed and said, "I didn't think it would go this far. I only wanted the four of us to stay together. I knew when I said that earlier that I wasn't going to be your Beta, I've known that for two years. I found you and Xak in the woods one evening, y'all were in the clearing having sex. When I came back to village, Xena, well you know how she is, she can tell when anything is wrong with any of us, asked if everything was okay. All I told her was that it was obvious beyond a doubt that I wouldn't be your Beta. She asked if I had figured it out, and I told her. She already knew, and since that day, she and I have been going out of our ways to make sure Uncle Mike never caught on to you two. I'm so sorry I provoked you into admitting that Xak's your mate. Please forgive me. I would be lost in jealousy and anger without Xena, and Xak would never survive without you. I did it to keep us together."
Richard went to hug his grandson and said, "This isn't your fault either. I need you to listen to what I have to say, then I will beg your forgiveness. And hopefully, Xena and Xak won't blame you anymore once I'm finished telling y'all." He glanced at the brother and sister and continued, "I can tell that you're blaming him, don't please. This is my fault, even I thought Mike would submit if I commanded him to. I never realized how deeply sated his hatred was." With that said, Richard recounted his story for the foursome while he stared at the wall, never making eye contact with any of them. He told them about lying to Nicolas for years, the vampire on the boat in Sabine Pass, the fate of his old pack and family, building a new pack and convincing them that vampires were their enemies, that he did love Margaret and that she knew she was second in his heart to Nicolas, that Mike only knew that Nicolas was his best friend and nothing more, and finally that he figured out the truth about Chris and Xak when they were very young. Neither Chris nor Xak remembered anything about being forced away from each other. Chris couldn't imagine himself ever getting violent and hitting anything and everything around him, or sitting in a corner banging his head against the wall. He could imagine Xak being so caught up in his thoughts that he would go into his own head and blank out, he could also imagine that temper-tantrum since he had been the recipient of a few of Xak's irritable moods. Contrarily, Xak thought he would never get so lost in thought that he would blankly stare into space nor that he would throw that bad of a temper-tantrum, but he had had to calm Chris down quite a few times over the years when his anger would control his emotions. Hours later, tear streaks staining his face, he turned back to the group and said, "So, you see, because of my lies and my obsession with the man I've loved nearly my entire life, this is all on me. Can y'all ever forgive me?"
Xak took all this information in. With the knowledge that Chris had had an effect on him and that he had affected Chris so positively when they were young, his brain once again went into overdrive. Though he never said it directly and always let Chris know that he really did love him, he had been blaming Chris for the past seven years for something that came naturally to them. They had never been away from each other for more than a couple of hours since before he could remember, so there was no data for him to analyze and compare to know what effect they had on each other. There was never a need to even consider that testing that because he always knew that if Chris wasn't with him at a certain moment he would be soon. Maybe, since his brain knew that he would be seeing Chris soon, it wouldn't allow him to become lost in his own thoughts. Did Chris ever get violent when he wasn't around? Sure, there were times Chris would seem kind of on edge by the time they saw each other, but Xak would smile at him and he would instantly get that goddamned shit-eating smirk that was completely irresistible to Xak and act like nothing in world could bother him.
Finally, Xak spoke, "So, you knew the truth about Chris and me and never told us? Why? Why did you lie to my dad too? You want forgiveness? HA! I have blamed Chris for seven fucking years for the fact that I have had to lie to father every damn day. SEVEN FUCKING YEARS! I could have loved him without the doubt in the back of my head. That annoying little voice that was always there saying to me `You know you only love him because you have to and you're too weak to challenge him.' Do you know how hard that has been?" He was surprising himself with what he was saying. Here he was berating the man he has called Pawpaw his entire life. He regarded the man as his grandfather. And to top it all off, he was also his Alpha. He knew he shouldn't be disrespecting his Alpha, let alone the man he considered family, this way but he couldn't stop. Seven years of doubting his love for Chris, seven years of lying to his friends (even if they did know the truth), seven years of hiding who he really was from his father, seven years of feeling like a coward because he couldn't imagine surviving a life without Chris all came down on the man that stood nearly a foot taller than him.
By the end of Xak's tirade, Richard was in his chair with his head in his hands and Xak was reduced to tears kneeling on the floor gasping for air through his sobs. Xena couldn't stand seeing her brother like this, but before she could go to console him, Chris was there and picked him up and carried him over to the couch where he sat and held his mate in his lap, stroking the smaller man's head and back. Xena looked at Richard and though she didn't feel any anger towards him, she thought he deserved to feel the pain he was experiencing for a little while longer. She next took notice of her best friend, Gary. She wanted to blame him, she had to admit, even if just a little; however, one look at his grief-stricken face, and she forgave him. She crossed the room to him and brought him into a hug and said to him, "I don't blame you, so stop blaming yourself." She continued in whisper just loud enough for Gary alone to hear, "Besides, Kielbasa and Xak are going to need us right now." This elicited a small chuckle out of Gary, which given the situation was not very appropriate, that he quickly turned into a cough. Xena then thought, Richard was right, the blame does indeed go on him, and maybe to some extent her father, but mostly him. She knew she would forgive him, she knew they would, there was more love there than anything else. It may take Chris and Xak a little longer to get there, but she knew Gary and herself were already on that road.
Finally, Chris got Xak calmed down enough to stop sobbing. He looked at his mate and Xak gasped and asked, "What did I just do?"
Chris laughed a little and responded, "You just gave Pawpaw a good dose of something he probably deserved. I might be mad at him but I can't hate him, he's my grandfather and I will always love him. Might not respect him that much right now, but who knows what I'll feel like tomorrow. As far as forgiveness goes, he thought he was doing the right thing, but he hurt you, so until you're ready to forgive him I can't. As long as you hurt because of what he did, I can't forgive him. But, I want you to know that I don't hold any negative feelings about you blaming me, I understood then why you blamed me, and I understand now, besides you're really cute when you're mad at me for making you believe that you love me." He then kissed Xak on the tip of his nose. He knew said all of it loud enough for Richard and the others to hear, he needed them to hear that. He knew that what he was saying to Xak was exactly what he, as well as the other in the room, needed to hear in order to begin forgiving Richard. He reminded Xak and everybody else at the beginning of his response who exactly Richard really was to the group, their Pawpaw first before anything else. He also pointed out that love trumps anger and hate. Then he reminded them that respect isn't need to love somebody and can be earned again. Then he planted the seed that even though he might be ready to forgive Richard for what happened, as Xak's mate, he couldn't truly do that until Xak did.
Xak looked into Chris' electric blue eyes and saw that he was telling the truth. He loved his grandfather, but couldn't forgive him for hurting Xak until Xak was ready to forgive him. Then he thought about how much love and protection and guidance the man has shown all of them over the years. Richard might have lied to everyone and hurt more than a few people, but he thought he was doing the right thing. After hearing what all Nicolas had done, he admitted that Nicolas needed to be stopped. Every effort Richard made, though, had been unsuccessful. Then he thought about his dad. He really didn't believe that even had told Mike the whole truth everything would've been fine. He knew how deep his father's unlike for anything different than him went. He might have loved his father, but he just realized that he never really liked the man very much. So, with a sigh, he stood up, crossed the room to Xena and Gary and pulled them into a hug. Next, he did the thing that ten minutes earlier he thought impossible. He went to Richard's chair, lifted the man's head out his hands, looked at the tear-stained face and sat in his lap and said, "I might not like you very much right now Pawpaw, but I still love you. When I realized that what you hid from us had caused me to blame Chris for anything, I got upset. I'm not sorry for what I said to you, you needed to hear that, but I think I can forgive you for unintentionally hurting Chris, Xena, Gary, and me, and hopefully they can to." He emphasized unintentionally to remind them that their Pawpaw wouldn't hurt them on purpose. They all came over to the desk and everyone joined in the group hug, the healing process of forgiveness began.
Richard looked down at Xak and asked, "Are you ready to be my new Beta?"
Surprisingly, what nobody had noticed the whole time since Mike's body had been removed, was that the office door was slightly open. Another thing nobody noticed was the person standing at the door, listening to everything that happened. That person then quietly left the building through the front door, like she always did. As soon as Trystan was out of the building, she pulled out the burner cell phone some guy named Justin had given her night before last when he knocked on her parent's door while she and her son Jacob were there on a visit. Before she was handed the phone, Justin, if that was even his real name, had forced his way into the house and quicker than she thought at all possible, had killed her parents. Jacob, her five-old-son who in about ten years she knew would have his first shift into a panther, was thankfully asleep and didn't see it happen.
Jacob's father, Dean, was long dead, even before Jacob was born, killed in Afghanistan when a road-side bomb detonated. He was on his last tour and she had gotten pregnant during his last leave. She never got a chance to let him know Jacob was coming. When she told his parents, who lived outside of Rusk in some weird village thing that the whole town thought was a commune, they called a man named Richard over. He proceeded to tell her all about things that go bump in the night. She thought they were all crazy until he stripped naked and right in front of her eyes, became a wolf. She might have said a few expletives and might have been in shock, but eventually asked if her soon to be born son would be a wolf. Dean's' mother chuckled and said, "Oh no hun, he'll be a panther like his daddy was."
Trystan dialed the only number that was programmed into the phone. It rang five times, then a calm cool voice answered, "Hello Trystan, dear, what do you have to tell me about my Richard? Tell me and I'll let you speak to Jacob for two minutes."
Trystan, in tears, said, "Mike, his Beta is dead. His grandson Chris' mate Xak is taking over the position. He told his grandsons and their friends some long story about how you and him used to be lovers." She continued for about five minutes and finally asked, "What do I need to do to get Jacob back, Justin told me you wouldn't hurt him."
Nicolas replied, "I promise you, no harm will come to little Jacob as long as you keep giving me information about Richard. I want to know his every move. I want to know everything, and you're the perfect person. Work with me, you'll have Jacob back soon. Stop working with or tell anything to anybody and well, let me just say, vampires that turned before the age of fifteen or so rarely make it long in the world of night, they're so unpredictable. Plus, I've only ever tried to turn a shifter once, but that was after his first shift. Let's just say, somethings should never be attempted. That was a walking nightmare. Now, like I promised, you have two minutes."
Next thing she heard was, "Mommy, when am I coming home?"
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