The Lake

By Sunday Jones

Published on Jul 5, 1997

Gay

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I came home from the last day of my summer job to find a phone message from James. He wanted to meet me at the diner where we hung out for a soda and had left me a time to meet him there, and a time to call him by if I could not make it. I was a bit concerned, I had spent most of the summer avoiding being alone with James, afraid he could tell by the look on my face how I felt about him, and afraid of losing him as a friend. A quick glance at my watch told me that I was ten minutes too late to call to cancel, so I hurriedly changed clothes and headed over to The Blue Fountain diner. Traffic was heavy with everyone leaving work so I was fifteen minutes late. When I walked in, I spotted James at a booth in a far corner, which was unusual since we usually sat up front to watch people and chat with other friends who showed up at the diner.

James saw me come in and waved me over. Wondering what was going on I headed over to the booth and slid in across from him. He had a strange look on his face, he looked serious, a foreign expression on his handsome, usually smiling, face. He asked how work had gone and we chatted about our summers, but I could tell he had something on his mind.

Finally James pointedly asked, "Alex, why have you been avoiding me all summer?"

"I...I haven't," I stammered.

"You have not spent ten minutes alone with me since school let out, I know you have been busy with work, but this is something more. Whenever I suggest we get together to just hang out alone you always find an excuse to back out. Have I done something to upset you?," he asked.

I made up a few lame excuses that sounded contrived, even to me. I couldn't meet his eyes.

"Okay," he said, "you don't want to talk about it. I understand." But I could tell he was hurt.

Something solidified in my gut and I decided to come clean, if I could not tell my best friend what was bothering me, I couldn't tell anyone.

I felt a flush creep up my neck, coloring my cheeks and making the tips of my ears burn, as I blurted out, "There is something wrong with me James, I didn't want you to find out, I didn't know how to tell you, but I have been having some strange thoughts about guys. Sex stuff, you know?"

To my surprise, James visibly relaxed, and smiled at me, not mockingly, but as though he had a secret he was teasing me with.

I was not prepared for his next question. "Have you done anything about the thoughts?" , he asked me softly.

I shook my head, afraid to look him in the eye.

"Alex," he went on, "I think most guys have thoughts like that at some time or another, and it not a problem as long as you don't let them rule your life, as long as you keep them in their place. Why haven't you done anything? , the last question coming out of him very fast."

"Well, James, there is only one guy I would ever consider doing anything with and I don't think he is at all interested in doing anything like that with me," I replied.

James asked, "Is he anyone I know?"

I could not believe how dense he seemed, I had thought for sure he would be running for his car by now. I just nodded.

An understanding light brightened James' eyes as he looked at me. He stared down at his hands for what seemed like an eternity before lifting his eyes to look at me and ask, "Me?"

I couldn't force my tongue to work so I just nodded and turned a brighter shade of red.

James started shuffling in his feet, and bouncing his knees below the table, a sure sign that he was nervous or excited by something. The idea of him being excited by this never crossed my mind, I could only think that I had gone too far and that my best friend was trying to find a way to tell me that he didn't want to ever see me again.

When James spoke again, he told me "Well, Alex, you have given me a lot to think about. I know you are still my best friend, and I am glad that this is the only reason you have been avoiding me, I was afraid you had gotten into some kind of trouble, drugs, or something, lots of crazy thoughts ran through my mind, but this was not one of them. Would you mind if I went home now to take some time to think about all this?"

I shook my head. "I appreciate your taking this so well James, take all the time you need, and please give me a call when you are finished thinking. I am sure this is just a phase I am going through, and I don't want it to strain or damage our friendship."

He slid out of the booth and patted my shoulder in a friendly way before heading for the door. I sat alone, finishing my Pepsi, and headed for the register to pay for our drinks. I started feeling nervous on the drive home, thinking that it was all over with James.

Telling James how I felt brought me back to the first time I realized I was attracted to him in both an emotional and sexual way.

We were sitting on an old dock, jutting out on the river, near my house. We had been drinking a little bit, to celebrate our 18th birthday. With my birthday on February 27th and his on the 28th we had always celebrated together with our families, and alone together, always sleeping over at his or my house. We had each had a couple beers and were watching the boats float by on the river, shivering a bit in the crisp winter night, but not wanting the evening to end. James always got serious when he drank and he started reminiscing about our past birthdays. He remembered everything we had ever done. even silly kid stuff that I had forgotten. He finally wound down and got very serious telling me that we would be best friends forever, that there is nothing that could happen to separate us. I was touched, even if it took a few beers for him to say something like that. I promptly agreed with him and spontaneously hugged him. We held onto each other for a few minutes. During that time of contact a burst of feelings flooded through my mind like an explosion set my subconscious free for a few minutes. I felt his arms around me and thought I how nice it would be for it to never end. After that night I never thought of James the same way again. He was no longer just my best friend, but someone I was attracted to and with whom wanted to spend all my time.

That was when I began began to distance myself from him. It was nothing he was doing. It was my fear of being found out. James has a way of seeing into me and finding out what is wrong. He usually gives me time to work things out on my own, but when he thinks it is getting to be too much for me to handle alone, he steps in and takes over, or at least symbolically holds my hands as I work though my problems. It was him who made it possible for me to tell my parents that I was failing Calculus, with him beside me I knew they wouldn't yell, and it was he who stayed calm and suggested, where my folks could hear, that I get a tutor, and as usual his idea worked and I squeaked through the class with a C average. But this was a problem I didn't want him to get out of me, it was the one thing I didn't think he could help me get through. I thought about going to a counselor, but there was nobody at school I trusted, and getting professional help would have involved giving my parents more explanations than I wanted to give. So, I took what seemed like my only way out, I avoided spending time alone with James. I couldn't stand the idea of not seeing him at all, so I compromised, deciding that I would be safe as long as there were other people around us at all times.

The whole afternoon had worn me out, so I came home, and after a brief hello to my folks, headed to bed. My parents probably thought I was sick or something; I am never the first one in the house to go to sleep. At around eleven that night I awoke to the sound of the phone ringing. Before it had rang 3 times I heard my mom grab it in the hallway outside my room. She was speaking softly, for her, which just meant that the neighbors couldn't hear her unless their windows were open. She was telling James that I had gone to bed and was asleep for the night. I jumped out of bed and ran to my door, poked my head out, and told my mom I was awake and would take the call in my room. She relayed the information to James and I picked up the phone by my bed and told her I had it. When she hung up her extension, I said "Hi James", and fell silent, not knowing what to say.

It was quiet for a few seconds until James softly asked, "Alex, are you there?"

"Yeah, I am."

"We need to talk some more, can you come meet me at the old dock down by the river?", he asked.

"When?", I asked, still a little groggy from sleep.

"How about now? I won't sleep until we talk."

"Sure," I agreed, "I have to get dressed, how does fifteen minutes sound?"

"Great! See you then buddy."

Since it was still warm for September I just threw on an Izod, a pair of shorts and running shoes and headed out the door. On the short walk to the dock I wondered why he had picked the river as the place to talk. We had often sat there, watching the leaves, branches, and other debris glide by as we talked, but now the place had a special significance for me.

When I got there he was pacing up and down the length of the dock. It was almost a full moon so I could see him from a ways away, and walked slower, taking in the view of his brown hair flopping back and forth off his forehead as he turned at the end of each length of the pier. When he saw me approach he stopped pacing and just watched me walk towards him. We did not speak, and when I was barely an arm's length away he reached out and enveloped me in a warm hug and held on for longer than usual. James is not usually an affectionate type guy, so this took me by surprise, but I quickly got my arms around him and hugged him back, thinking that this kind of thing would be very easy to get used to.

James led me to the end of the dock where we sat in our usual spot, facing the wide expanse of water, or feet dangling down inches about the surface of the river. Instead of facing forward to talk, like we usually did, James tucked one foot under his other leg and turned halfway to face me. He shuffled in place a bit, like he was trying to find a comfortable position. Not knowing what to expect, prepared for the worst, I got up the nerve to ask him if he had reached any kind of decision about how he felt about all this.

"Alex," he said softly, "earlier when you told me how you had been thinking about me, I was shocked, and very flattered. When I said that I thought most guys had feelings like this, I was including myself in that group. And the more I thought about you struggling with this, the more it made me face my own feelings on the subject. While I don't really know what I want, I do know that if you are willing to explore these feeling with me, I would really like to give it a try. There is nobody else that I would feel comfortable doing this with." His little speech came out like a torrent, never stopping for breath, as though he had to get it all out before he changed his mind.

I was speechless. I turned to look at him and tried to catch his eye as he looked everywhere except directly at me. Finally deciding that he was not joking, James would never do that to me, I asked, "You sure?"

He nodded slowly, finally looking me directly in the eye.

Not knowing what to say, we both spent several minutes staring out at the river, tracking the movement of a leaf caught in the current of the river, dipping and swirling past us, finally leaving our view as it went around a bend in the river.

I spoke first, "If you are sure about this, and I know its what I want too, what do we do now?"

James had apparently already given this some thought. "We have one more weekend left before we start school. Why don't we take a hike up to the lake near Hawk Mountain and camp out for the weekend. You are done with work, and my folks know I have not been spending much time with you, I am sure they will say its okay."

It sounded like a great plan to me. "That would be cool James, when should we leave?"

"Well," he said, "tomorrow is Thursday, if we get everything we need together tomorrow, we can get an early start on Friday morning. If we leave by seven we can get up to the park, and finish hiking to the lake by three or four in the afternoon. How does that sound?"

I was grinning ear to ear, "Sounds like a plan, buddy. I'm sure it'll be no problem with my folks."

We stood and hugged each other, for the first time we were touching each other knowing how the other felt. The hug went on for several minutes in the moonlight and when we pulled apart, it was like having an important part of my body amputated. I didn't want to lose touch with that feeling. He surprised me by giving me a quick kiss on my cheek and turning to run off the dock, and back up the road towards his house, turning to shout, "Talk to you tomorrow Alex, pleasant dreams."

I don't remember the walk back home; I was shrouded in a fog of happy contentment. I somehow found my way to my house, and up to my room, where I stripped and climbed into bed thinking of the coming weekend. I planned what to take, both for the camping trip and for any experimentation that happened. I wanted this to be the best weekend of my life, everything had to be perfect.

James called me the next morning and we worked out who was buying what, and who was going to bring what. We decided that he would take care of the food and I would bring my tent, it was smaller and would be less to carry on the hike up to the lake. We were so busy we didn't see each other at all on Thursday, but I was waiting out front with my tent and sleeping bag and back pack full of supplies when he pulled up out front at seven sharp.

He popped his trunk and I tossed in my gear. James opened the passenger door from inside and I got in and belted myself. He looked over at me and smiled. "You look sleepy Alex, it's a long drive up to the mountains, why don't ya'll lean back and sleep for a while." James' slight accent, left over from his early childhood in Texas came through sometimes.

I didn't know if he was nervous about all this and didn't want to talk right now, or if he just wanted to let me catch up on my sleep. I was too excited to sleep, so I just leaned back and narrowed my eyes to slits and watched as we got on our way. Right before we got on the turnpike James pulled into a convenience store for a carton of milk. Somehow this made me feel comfortable. James has a thing for two percent milk, and if he had the presence of mind to stop for some before heading out on a weekend with no refrigeration, then he couldn't be too nervous.

By the time we had gone a few miles up the turnpike, James had finished his milk and popped in his Alanis Morrisette cassette. I kept my eyes mostly closed as I watched him dance in his seat, occasionally singing aloud his favorite lyrics. I took the time to really take in his appearance. His hair was longer than mine, a healthy, thick chestnut brown, short on the sides and back, but long enough to flop in his face in away that made him look both boyish and vulnerable. Physically we were very similar, medium height,, maybe a little short for our ages, but both of us had hopes of adding a few inches before we stopped growing, we were both slim, within ten pounds of each other in weight, James being the more muscular of the two of us and his dark brooding look complimented my dark blonde, preppy blandness. Both of us had no trouble attracting girls when we wanted to, but lately the idea had not been too high on my list of priorities. It must not have been a major thing for James either this summer, since this was the first time since we turned fourteen that he didn't have a girl at his side from June to August. If James had kept the pact we had made when we were twelve, and I was sure he had, he had not gone farther with a girl than some heavy petting. We had sworn an oath to tell each other immediately if either of us went all the way with a girl and as of yet, neither of us had anything to confess.

When I finished absorbing the sight of James, I noticed our clothes. Without planning to, we had both dressed basically the same. We both wore shorts made from cut off Levi 501's, and navy blue pull over shirts, his a Polo, and mine an Izod, but basically the same. Even our hiking boots were the same, not surprising really, since our moms had gotten together and bought us identical pairs for our birthdays last winter, all the while complaining that we would outgrow them before we came close to wearing them out, but willing to indulge us on this since we both wanted them so much.

Somewhere winding through the mountains I dozed off. James gently shook me awake and I looked around, noticing we were in the parking lot of Hawk Mountain Preserve. We quickly got out of the car and retrieved our gear from the trunk, eager to be on our way. We had a long hike ahead of us, through a deep valley and over a ridge to the most secluded part of the park, a site we had found a couple years ago on a hiking expedition that we hoped was too far off the paths to have attracted any other campers. On the hike to the lake we started talking about sex. We had both given it a lot of thought and for the first time we voiced our curiosity about what it would be like to have sex with a guy, and with each other in particular.

"I want to warn you up front," James said, "I don't know what it will be like to kiss a guy, and I'm not sure its something I am ready to do."

I nodded, afraid to talk, the idea of kissing him was something I had thought about continuously for several months, but I didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable. I figured it would be something we could try, and if he didn't like it, we would stop.

"I know what you mean," I lied, "whatever we do, its gotta only be stuff we both want, okay?"

He brightened up, and nodded vigorously, "Right! If either of us wants to stop at anytime we will say so."

"It's a deal," I said, holding out my hand to shake on it.

At that point we began climbing the last ridge so we had to be careful of our footing and did not have much time for talking. By the time we crested the ridge, and viewed the valley and sparkling lake spreading out before us, we were both pretty tired, out of breath, and sweaty. This side of the ridge was a more gradual slope down to the clearing beside the lake, we picked up speed so we could reach the lake and set up camp before it got dark, knowing the sun would set early behind the mountains surrounding this place.

We finally reached the clearing and found it deserted. We guessed, aloud, that there we were the only ones for miles around. Choosing a likely spot for our camp on the edge of the clearing where someone had left a fire ring from their camping expedition, we split up for chores. Since it was my tent, I would stay and set it up, getting everything ready for the night before it got too dark while James went off in search of firewood so we could cook dinner. After James had entered the woods, I took off my boots and socks so I wouldn't track dirt in the tent while setting it up, and figuring I could catch some of the last of the late afternoon sun, I also stripped off my sweaty shirt, hanging it over a branch to dry. It took me about thirty minutes to get everything set. When I was done I decided to grab some more rocks and make the ring around the fire pit a little bigger while James finished hunting for wood.

I was kneeling by the pit arranging the rocks when James came back. Silently he stripped off his boots and shirt before I saw him. I didn't know he was back until he hit me in a running tackle, knocking us both into the cool grass. Taken by surprise, it took me a few minutes to realize what was happening. Then I began to fight back, wrestling, with a vigor I didn't usually associate with play fighting. We rolled around in the grass, our sweaty bodies rubbing against each other until I could not tell his musky scent from my own. After a few minutes of serious wrestling I began to get winded and surrendered. He didn't let up until he had me pinned, his hands pressing my wrists into the ground and his weight resting on my chest. He grinned down at me with a smile that looked like it was going to split his face wide open. We were both breathing hard and perspiring freely. To get in one last jab at me he shook his head, flinging sweat all over the two of us.

"You need a bath!", was all I could think of to say.

"So do you!"

He released my hands so I could get up, but instead I reached up and gave the fly of his shorts a pull. In one quick motion I had all of the buttons open and could see the bright whiteness of his underwear against the dark tan of his stomach. He decided to follow my lead and moved back so he could open my shorts. He took it a step farther and actually pulled them off me once he had the buttons undone. When he stood I grabbed the legs of his shorts and pulled them down so he could step out of them. It was getting darker as he helped me up. He looked at me mischievously and said, I'll race you!

Before I could respond, he stripped off his briefs and started running towards the lake. I almost tripped trying to run as I was pulling my own off , but I made it to the edge of the lake as he entered the water in a shallow dive, skimming just below the surface. I dove in and started swimming to catch up to him. We are pretty well matched in the water, but he had a head start. When I caught up to him he was treading water out towards the middle of the small, sun warmed lake. I came to a stop beside him and started treading water beside him.

"Beat ya!" he teased, splashing me playfully.

I splashed back, and told him "Yeah, but you had a head start. Catch me now!" I tapped him on the head, pushing him under and swam quickly away under water.

When I surfaced he was still twenty feet away looking around for me. He spotted me and started swimming my way. I moved off the side and when he surfaced, I reached over and touched his shoulder, "Tag! You're still it!", and swam away again.

I didn't go as far this time and he easily caught me. Just before reaching me he dove deep. I looked around for him but couldn't see where he had gone. I learned where a second later when he grabbed both my feet and pulled me under. I recovered quickly and grabbed him. We wrestled below the surface for a few moments until we both needed to break the surface for air.

This time we were much closer in the water, and I grew embarrassed as I realized that in our wrestling he had brushed against my hard cock. I didn't stay embarrassed because I realized I had felt his hardness pressing against my hip as we wrestled. We swam silently in place, just watching each other's eyes. I started feeling chilly so I nodded my head towards shore and began swimming in that direction. James was quickly at my side as we had one last race towards shore. This time I beat him, and climbed up on the lakeshore where I collapsed on my back in the soft grass. The last golden red rays of sun were receding behind the mountain in front of us, and over our heads the stars were piercing the dark blue sky from north to south.

We lay side by side catching our breath, occasionally one of us pointing out a constellation to the other as the sky grew darker and the stars more pronounced in the night sky. As we lay there James feel asleep. I just stared at the sky battling with myself. The last couple days had only intensified my feelings for James. I was coming to realize that I did not just want to fool around with him this weekend, I wanted to be with him in a real relationship. I had read a lot of things about guys falling in love with straight friends, and while I knew that James was not exactly straight, I was sure he would never consider a relationship with another male, and that I was setting myself up to have my heart broken when he had gotten all of this experimentation out of his system.

When it did not seem like he was going to awaken soon, I quietly climbed to my feet and headed back towards the tent. Once there I retrieved one of the sleeping bags, a Pepsi, and my back pack. I took them back to the shore and unzipped the bag, making a large surface to lay on. I gently woke James and got him to move onto the sleeping bag, and opened the soda. We shared the can, passing it back and forth until it was empty. While we drank I got up the nerve to be more open with him, deciding for once not to just follow his lead and to let him know what the weekend meant to me.

As I tried to find the words to express how I felt about him in such a way that he wouldn't feel pressured or threatened, he put his hand on my thigh. Distracted I pushed it away. He seemed startled by this act and looked up at me, and asked "What's wrong Alex? I thought you wanted this."

"I do!", I exclaimed, "But I need to tell you something first. James, I love you. This is not just an experimentation thing for me. I have thought a lot about this and I know that I love you, I don't expect you to feel the same way, but you deserve to know how important this is to me."

"God Alex, I had no idea you felt this way about me, I didn't know."

"I love you too," he continued, "but I don't know how far this can go. Its not that I don't love you, because I do, but I don't know if I am ready for any kind of serious thing with you, or any guy, I planned to use this weekend to explore some feelings I have had, and to try to work some stuff out in my head."

I whispered softly, "I'm sorry James, I didn't mean to lay this on you like this. I just am afraid that after this is over you will forget about it, and I know I never will."

He reached over and brushed my bangs out of my eyes.

"Alex, no matter what happens, I will not forget this, ever. I want to do everything we talked about, and I want to do them with you. If that's not enough for you I understand, and we can forget it. But I do love you, never forget that."

I laid back on the bag, and stared at the stars for a few minutes, and decided that no matter what the future might bring, I wanted this weekend with James. I turned on my side, propping my head up on one elbow, and answered.

"James, now that you know how I feel, if you still are willing to go through with this, I am too. I love you, and if this weekend is all we ever have together in this way, that will be enough."

A smile lit up his face, and he jokingly asked, "Do you really want dinner?"

Laughing softly I shook my head, no.

He moved closer to me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me close enough for our chests to touch. His nipples had hardened with emotion, or from the cooler night air, and felt like tiny pebbles pressing into my flesh. The smoothness of my chest was scratched slightly by the small tuft of hair in the center of his chest. I had long envied him that sign of maturity, but having it against me was almost as good as having it for myself.

He brought his lips to mine and kissed me. His lips were cold and stiff, he kept his mouth tightly closed and just kind of pushed against my mouth. It was less than I expected, but it was a start. I pulled away slightly and leaned down to kiss his neck. James relaxed when I started nibbling and licking my way down his throat to the top of his chest. Rolling him over on his back, I moved down his body, my hands staying a few inches ahead of my mouth. I took one of his hard nipples in my mouth, flicking it with my tongue and softly biting it produced a gasp from his parted lips. His breathing became more labored as I began kissing my way down the light fan of hair from his stomach towards his navel. Moving my hand to his inner thigh, I let my fingertips just graze his skin, inching closer and closer to his balls where they rest against his right leg.

As I approached his hard dick, my stomach began to flutter. Realizing that this was a big step, I firmed my resolve and took the base in one hand. My hand fit comfortably around the shaft of his cock even though it was somewhat larger than my own. My hand felt at home there, as though it knew what to do. Tilting his hard shaft up and away from his body, I leaned back and stared at his circumcised cock. The shaft was a dark tan, the color of coffee with cream and the area below the head began to darken from the light brown of his circumcision scar to a deep purple when it reached his plum shaped glans. A drop of clear fluid glistened at the tip. Focusing on the drop I leaned down and licked the head. Using my tongue I spread the clear fluid across the surface of his helmet shaped head. I tasted the spicy saltiness of the drop of pre-cum, and savored it on my tongue. The feeling of intimacy increased as I took the head into my mouth, sucking the cap softly and using my tongue to explore the spongy firmness and texture of his cock. Inexperienced as I was I didn't think I could get all of his almost eight inch cock in my mouth, but I wanted as much as possible. I slid my lips down along his shaft, noticing the difference in texture as my tongue encountered the taut skin covering the rod that was sinking into my mouth. When the head of his cock reached the back of my throat I stopped, feeling his muscles tighten and relax in waves across his body. Holding his cock in my mouth I covered every inch of it with my tongue. His cock grew harder the more I licked on it, and each gentle suck he responded by lifting his hips off the blanket, trying to get more of him into my mouth. After a few minutes of careful exploration, he pulled me off his cock and up into his arms, whispering my name.

He kissed me again, this time with more passion. His lips remained closed again, but there was a warmth and suppleness to them that the other kiss lacked. I kissed back more forcefully this time and kept it going until he pulled away gasping. He gave me a quizzical look and rolled me over onto my back.

"My turn." he said playfully.

He must have been playing close attention to what I did to him because he repeated the actions almost exactly. He kissed and licked his way down my torso until he reached my stomach. Mine was the first uncircumcised penis he had ever touched and he seemed a little unsure of what to do. When he grasped the shaft of my cock and held it for a few moments, I covered his hand with my own and pulled it down, showing him how to retract my skin and let the head come out from under the sheath. I gasped as the cool night breeze wafted across the dampness of my exposed cockhead. The feel of his warm hand wrapped around the shaft of my cock was enough to send shivers up my spine and drops of pre-cum bubbling up out of my cock. Taking a few moments to gather his courage, he took the head of my cock into his mouth. I felt his tongue caressing me as he cleaned the clear, shiny fluid from the my hard glans. He lifted his head and turned to meet my eyes. I was struck by the clean masculine beauty of his face as we stared at one another. He broke his gaze a moment later and turned back to look at my cock. He used his hand to bring my foreskin up to cover and uncover my pink helmet a few times before taking it back into his mouth. My cock is more slender than his, and just over six inches long. He was able to take more of it into his mouth than I could of his. When I felt the head of my cock rub against the soft tissue at the back of this throat a shiver went through my body and gooseflesh rippled across my chest, arms and legs. He continued sucking and licking my dick for a few minutes, I was raising my hips to meet him as he took more and more of my cock into his mouth. When I felt his lips brush against my pubic hair, I moaned softly and felt my balls draw up close to my body. Afraid my approaching orgasm would end things prematurely, I pulled him off my cock and back up against me, chest to chest, face to face.

Kiss. This time is was magical. Or lips met and I felt the warmth spread from there throughout my body. I wrapped my arms around him and held him close. Our hard cocks warred against each other between us, each of us grinding it against the other, spreading a wet trail of pre-cum against our stomachs. Instinctively I opened my mouth slightly into the kiss. James opened his as well and our tongues met for the first time. He tasted sweet and salty, I loved the flavor our cocks mingling with our saliva as our tongues battled like our dicks. He drew my tongue into his mouth and began to suck on it gently, exactly like he had sucked on my cock. This drove me crazy. I loosened my arms form around him and let my fingers scratch and massage there way up and down his back. I clawed at him with a passion I had never imagined. When the kiss broke off, I shouted, louder than I intended, "I love you James!" and listened to it echo faintly back from the surrounding hills.

James looked into my eyes and whispered, "I love you too Alexander."

Turning about so his head was near my groin and his hard cock was inches from my face he began licking my balls. Realizing this was a perfect opportunity to find out what we both liked I began to mirror his actions. I took one of his balls in my mouth and sucked on it lightly as I ran my tongue over the surface of the skin. There was a slight saltiness to the flesh from the sweat that had formed and dried as we lay under the stars. He switched to my other ball so I did too, and then, with a little work, got them both into my mouth. I dropped back to doing one almost immediately, having both in my mouth did not give me room to breathe or to really use my tongue. Slowly we worked our way up each other's shaft. James took my dick back into his mouth while I sucked on just the head of his cock. Running my hand between his thighs gave me an idea.

While James continued to send shivers up and down my spine by working on my cock, vigorously sliding his lips up and down the shaft and focusing on the head on each upward stroke, I decided to try something new. I moved my mouth lower, to the base of his scrotum where the sac meets the skin between his leg. As I kissed and licked that area I felt his mouth come off my cock, he began moaning softly. As I worked deeper between his legs he bent one knee giving me better access to the crevasse between his legs. I inched forward, entering the cleft between the cheeks of his ass. Using my tongue, I explored this new region. James seemed exceptionally sensitive to the actions of my mouth down there. He spread his legs farther apart as my tongue reached his anus. Letting myself go, and not really believing I was doing it, I began to lick and kiss his hole. In the shadows cast by his legs in the moonlight I could not see what I was doing and relied on the sense of touch from my tongue alone. I clutched the cheeks of his ass in both hands and pulled them apart, giving myself better access to his hole and allowing my tongue to get a little ways inside him, coating the opening of his ass with spit. Releasing one cheek, I began probing the hole with my finger tip between licking and kissing his anus. Feeling his body relax under the ministrations of my tongue I let one fingertip sink in up to the second knuckle. James moaned and rolled over onto his back. I climbed between his legs and grasped his knees, pulling them apart and up, giving me even better access to his hole. I licked and kissed the opening until it was relaxed enough to take first one complete finger, and then two.

While running my fingers in and out of his ass I returned my mouth to his cock. I sucked the head into my mouth and slid as much as I could into my mouth, lifting my head on and off his penis in time with the thrusts of my fingers. When I felt his cock tensing up as though he was about to cum, I stopped everything I was doing. Climbing back up his body until we were face to face I silently stared at him.

His eyes were wide and his skin flushed as he grasped that back of my neck and pulled me towards his mouth. There was no resistance this time, his lips parted as soon as they touched mine, and I drew his tongue into my mouth. He ran his tongue over the tips of my teeth and I felt him exploring my mouth with all the passion he had used when exploring my cock. We kissed for at least ten minutes, using our hands to express our joy in the possession of each other's body.

When at last we took a break from kissing, I pulled my self into a sitting position next to James. Running my fingers over his chest I shyly confessed that there was something else I wanted to do.

"James," I said softly, "whenever I have thought about doing this with you, it has always ended with you screwing me. The idea of you pumping into me was enough to get me off almost every night since last March. But, that was before I saw your cock up close and hard. Its awfully big, and I don't think I could handle it."

He chuckled softly, "It's okay Alex." He paused, "You know, I bet you I could handle you."

My jaw dropped. This was something I had not considered. Somehow, I never thought that James' experimentation would go so far as to let himself be fucked. It took a few moments of mental gymnastics for me to realign my thoughts before I asked, "Are you sure you want to try this?"

"Hell yes!," he replied, "We have done everything else haven't we?"

I nodded, and quickly leaned down and kissed him before crawling to the edge of the sleeping bag and retrieving a small bottle of sweet almond oil from my back pack.

In response to the questioning look in his eyes, I motioned for him to roll onto his stomach. Kneeling beside him I took some of the oil onto my palm and rubbed my hands together to get the oil warm. I climbed onto his back, with one knee on either side of his hips and began working the oil into his neck and shoulders. Spreading it very thin I searched out each knot of tension and every tight muscle and rubbed and massaged them until they unclenched. Adding oil as my hands became dry I worked my way down his back, trying to release the muscles down each side of his spine. Moving down his back, sliding my hips backwards I finally came to his ass. I noticed as I massaged oil into the cheeks that the moonlight was making his normally tan skin gleam silver, like a warm living statue. The perfection of the muscles rippling under his skin took my breath away.

Moving my knees into the area between his parted legs I drizzled a small amount of oil into the crack between the glistening globes of his ass. I massaged the oil into the whole area, especially focusing on getting the slick fluid into his hole to make sure there was no pain during my penetration of his virginal ass. James gasped and moaned softly when I put a second finger into him, but when I added a little more oil, my fingers went in and out easily and his gasps switched to sharp intakes of breath and yips of pleasure.

"Turn over James," I whispered in his ear.

When he complied, I was astounded to see how hard his cock had become while I was fingering his hole. His balls were pulled up flat against his groin and the tip of his cock was shiny with pre-cum, glistening in the dim light.

On impulse I dumped the rest of the oil onto his cock, and let it drip into his pubic hair. With my hand I worked it into the shaft and across the head of his thick cock. I spread the oil down and cupped his balls, coating the scrotum with the sweet smelling lubricant. My hands were slick enough to coat my own cock, making it slick and shiny. I wiped my hands on my leg and lay atop James. We kissed as we ground out groins together, the oil making the shaft of our cocks slide against each other, producing much more intense feelings than our dry humping had earlier.

James slipped to one side and chewed on my ear lobe. When our grinding and humping began to bring feelings of impending orgasm, he asked me to enter him. James started to try to turn over, but I stopped him. I wanted to see his face as I penetrated him. Positioning myself between his spread legs, I lifted his knees and positioned his ankles on my shoulders.

His eyes were wide as I moved forward, the head of my cock brushing between the slick cheeks of his ass. I slid closer to him and positioned the head of my cock at the burning hot hole. I settled my weight on my knees and looked into his face. He was staring into my eyes and biting his lower lip nervously. Thinking he might be having second thoughts I asked him if he was ready. He nodded slowly, never letting his eyes leave mine.

He winced slightly as the head of my cock slipped inside his hole. I waited there, patiently, so he could relax. The soft, tight heat surrounding the head of my cock was incredibly intense. It was all I could do not to bury myself in him, connecting myself to him in the deepest way possible. I leaned down to kiss him. James responded to the kiss passionately, putting his arms around my neck and pulling my chest down against him. I felt him wince again, then relax as a little more of my shaft slipped into him. He sucked my tongue into his mouth, I swirled it around his, and nibbled softly on his lower lip. He pulled his mouth away long enough to ask me to finish entering him.

Burying my face in his neck, I slid my hips forward. Biting his neck to distract him from any pain he was feeling from the penetration, I finally managed to sink my cock in to the base. When I felt his balls pushing into my pubic hair I stopped and let him grow accustomed to my hard dick being inside him. When I felt his hole relax around my dick, I slowly pulled back a few inches, then slid back into place. James pulled my face up to his so we could continue kissing. I pulled his tongue into my mouth, sucking on it like a small cock. The feeling of completeness grew in me from his tongue in my mouth, and my dick in his ass. As the feelings spreading from my lips, cock, and soul enveloped me I reached down to wrap one hand around his still slick shaft. I jerked him off in time to my thrusts. As my thrusts increased in length and power I increased the stroking of his cock. I had never imagined a dick could get as hard as his shaft felt in my slippery hand. The head of his cock bumped and slid across my stomach as I jerked him off,his hardness rubbing against me increased my desire for him. Not knowing how much longer I could keep from cumming inside him, I began to focus my hand's movements on the top part of his dick. My thumb and forefinger sliding up and down on the head of his cock had James bucking his hips up driving my hand faster over his dick, and forcing my cock to enter him quicker and more frequently. When his dick finally exploded a huge load of semen over my hand and between our stomachs the resulting spasms of the muscles in his ass drove me over the edge. I drove my tongue into his mouth, as my balls drew up and unloaded their contents into his ass. The feelings of intense pleasure and closeness to James washed over me at once. When I finished cumming I noticed tears streaming down my face.

James ignored the sticky mess between us and pulled my head down to his chest. He stroked my hair softly and whispered, I love you, over and over into my ear. I was overcome with emotion and sobs racked my body, I clung to him like a drowning person clinging to a rubber raft. My best friend put a hand on each side of my face and drew it close to his own. He kissed the tears away from my face and let me get the crying out of my system. My cock had grown soft and fallen out of his ass, and his had softened until I could just feel it pressing into my lower stomach.

Rolling over on our sides, James kept touching me softly, brushing the hair from my eyes, and brushing his lips against mine, and against my face and neck. When I had caught my breath he drew my chin up so he could see into my eyes.

"Alex, Alex, Alex...", he kept repeating.

Uncertain of my control over my vocal chords, I just looked at him.

"I love you," he said, "I love you more than I have ever loved anyone in my life."

"I don't think this is a phase," he went on, "and this goes way beyond experimentation. I don't know where this is going, but I want to see where it goes, with you at my side."

I was not sure I heard him right, "Are you really sure you feel that way James?"

"As sure as I have ever been of anything." He continued, "I still don't know if I am gay, or bisexual, or what, but I know I love you so much I am willing to do what it takes to find out."

I shivered slightly and moved closer to him. It was now after midnight and the mountain air was chilly.

James mentioned wanting to clean up, so I grabbed a couple towels and a bar of soap from my back pack and we waded into the lake. Taking turns, we washed the oil and the drying semen from each other, taking time to caress and kiss as we went along. When we were clean we stepped out of the water and dried one another.

"How do you feel about spending the rest of the night out here instead of in the tent?", James asked.

"Sounds like a great idea to me."

We went back to the camp site and retrieved the other sleeping bag and our pillows. Back at the lakeshore we zipped the bags together and crawled inside. James immediately wrapped his arms around me and pulled me against him so his chest was pressed against my back. Resting my head on his arm, I soon fell asleep, feeling safe with his body wrapped around me.

When I awoke the next morning I was alone. I looked around and saw James sitting by the foot of our makeshift bed in a pair of shorts, watching some deer graze farther around the lake. On closer inspection, I saw that our bed was surrounded by hundreds of wildflowers. James had gotten up at dawn and scoured the meadow surrounding the lake for hours to gather them all. I almost started to cry again, but the emotion transformed itself to pure joy as all of the previous night came back to me. It was not a dream. My best friend was now my lover.

We spent the rest of the weekend talking, and making love whenever the urge hit us. We never wore more than shorts except on one hike around the lake. And on our hike back to the car we vowed that we would always return to the lake for the last weekend of summer no matter where we were. And so far, we have always kept that vow.

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