The Love We Have

By Dannii Ree

Published on Sep 9, 2001

Gay

Disclaimer: You know it, I know it... I wish I knew them, but I don't. This is complete fiction.

Notes: < ... > marks Justin's or JC's thoughts. You'll figure it out:)!!

Notes2: Evil grin... thanx for all the amazing feedback after the cliffhanger n the last chapter. Yes, we know how to catch our reader's attention! lol So, thanx again, to everybody. Luke, thanx for all your mails!!! Here's the next. Enjoy!

Chapter 12 by Dannii

<Shit.> JC thought. <I can't kiss him. I can't. It will ruin everything. Maybe he'll hate me, or he'll feel awkward around me from then on. I don't want that. I want to keep what we have. I'll have to figure out what I really feel for him before I do or say anything.> So, instead of kissing Justin, like he really wanted to do, he put his arms around Justin's back - with some difficulties, because Justin was still laying on the bed - and hugged him as tight as he could without breaking him. And after a second of hesitation, he felt Justin relax against his body and return the embrace. <God, this feels so good,> JC thought, <I could do this every day, all the time.>

At first, Justin was confused and unconsciously stiffened a bit, but then, after a moment, he totally relaxed into JC's embrace and sighed a bit. <God, this feels so good.> he was thinking exactly the same thoughts as JC had seconds earlier. <He smells so nice. His body feels so good. - Oh god, he still doesn't have a shirt on. I can't believe it. I never want to let him go again.>

JC finally interrupted the silence.

"Thank you for everything, Justin." He said with a hoarse voice. "I'm so glad that you are here and that you are Lynn's son. I had so much fun the last days, those were like the best days of my life. Thanks for being there for me."

He didn't make a move, just laid there, on top of Justin, his head buried in Justin's neck, his hands clasped behind Justin's back. He knew that he wasn't wearing a shirt, but that didn't make him uncomfortable. He just enjoyed the moment and the sensation of Justin's hand now softly stroking his back.

"I'm glad, too" Justin responded, whispering. "I like you a lot, JC. You're a great person, the best big brother and friend somebody could wish for." He softly ran his hands over JC's back, enjoying the feeling. <Who knows, maybe I'll never feel this again.> They were laying there in this position for about a few seconds, when they heard a knock on the door. Slowly they separated and smiled at each other, and JC leaned in and gave Justin a gentle kiss on the cheek.

"Thank you."

He stood up and went to the door to let in whoever was on the other side, and Justin looked after him with a smile on his face. A moment later Lynn entered the room. Josh quickly put on a shirt and sat back again beside Justin on the bed, and they looked at Lynn expectantly.

"What's up, mom?" Justin asked. Lynn smiled.

"Nothing much, honey. I just wanted to know when you have to leave tomorrow and if I should drive you to college, or if you can drive with Joshua. And when breakfast should be ready." She looked down at the two boys.

"He can drive with me, Lynn", JC answered. "First- and second-year students have the introduction together, because we also have several classes together. The introduction starts at ten, so we should leave here at half past nine, I think." Lynn looked thoughtfully at him and nodded then.

"That sounds fine. That means we all can have breakfast together, because Jim doesn't have to be at work before eleven. - Okay, boys, I'll head to bed, I'm tired. Justin, honey, don't stay up too long - you know how grumpy you are in the morning when you have to go to school and didn't have enough sleep." She walked in direction of the door while she spoke.

"Mom!" Justin whined, and JC laughed.

"I'll watch out that he doesn't stay up too late, Lynn, don't worry." he grinned. Lynn grinned at them again and said good night before she left the room and closed the door behind her. Justin turned to JC with a pout on his lips.

"Great, Josh. Just support my mom. Traitor." JC laughed out loud and ruffled Justin's hair.

"Don't pout, honey, you look so much better when you smile. And you know that I don't want you to go to bed too early. This is our quality time, right?" The pout on Justin's lips disappeared and made room for a big, sunny smile.

"You're right. Your luck." He settled back on the bed, and a second later JC joined him and put his head on Justin's shoulder. They stayed this way, watched the movie and talked like always, until Justin was too tired to keep his eyes open and decided to go to bed. JC gave him a soft goodnight kiss on the cheek, and Justin went to bed with a blissful smile in his face and, for the first time since he arrived in Orlando, fell asleep the moment his head hit the pillow.


The next morning, Justin woke up early, like the days before. He had a nervous feeling in his stomach and for a moment didn't know why, but then he remembered. College. Today was going to be his first day at the new college.

Suddenly he remembered his first day at the high school he visited back in Tennessee, a few years ago. He remembered how all the other boys had made fun of him because he was so smart. They had laughed at him and called him a girl because of his curls, and he had sat alone at lunch while all the other kids around him sat together in groups and had fun. And suddenly the fear was there that everything was going to repeat itself. He could already see the other boys laugh at him and call him names. <I can't go there,> he thought desperately, <I just can't.> Tears came to his eyes and he sat heavily down on his bed. When the first tear began to roll down his face, he began to sob, first quietly, then louder. He didn't hear JC knock on his door from inside the bathroom, and he didn't hear and see him enter the room after a few seconds when he didn't get an answer. But he felt the arms that suddenly surrounded him, the warm body he was pulled against, the comforting hands that stroked his back and his head, and he heard the soothing voice that talked to him.

"Ssshhhh, Justin", JC cooed as he cradled the younger boy in his arms. He didn't know what had happened, but something seemed to upset Justin very much, and he wanted to make it right. "Everything is fine. Tell me what happened. I'll make it better, I promise."

Justin clutched to JC like he was his lifeline. "I can't do it, Josh. They will hate me, I know it, and I can't take it anymore. I don't want to go there, please don't make me."

JC continued to stroke Justin's back and his arms, while he softly rocked him.

"Nobody is going to hate you, Curly, I can promise you that. Nobody. They'll love you. How can they not love you? You're wonderful. You're smart, you're funny, you're good looking, and you have so much talent. The people back in Tennessee were just jealous, that's why they treated you different. They couldn't stand that you are perfect. But this is different here. People will love you for your talent. They will adore you." JC noticed that Justin had stopped sobbing and was intensively listening to his words, so he continued.

"You'll see, everything is different here. And you already know Tyler and me. It is his first day today, too. You're not alone. It will be fine." He leaned back a bit and looked into Justin's eyes that were red from crying.

Slowly he brought a hand up to Justin's face and wiped away the tears that were still on his cheeks, and Justin leaned into the touch. Then, suddenly, he smiled.

"Thank you, Josh. I don't know what I'd do without you. You're right, I just panicked for a moment. You and Tyler will be with me, and it will be fine."

It was a real smile, and JC smiled back at him and squeezed Justin's hand.

"Yes, it will. This I promise you."

TBC... ****************************************************************** Feedback is very appreciated: Megan: jujuissecksi@hotmail.com

Dannii: raindrops79@hotmail.com

Next: Chapter 14


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