Tom Browning's Schooldays

Tom Browning's Schooldays

By

Joel

Chapter Seventeen

We were giggling all the way to the Hall stable. Bobby wasn't there and nor was Tarquin so we tethered Blaze and Silver and scurried into the back door and along the passage to the servants' stairs. No one was about so we were in my bedroom with the door shut and locked without being observed. My cloak and jerkin were off in a trice and my braces off my shoulders with my britches unbuttoned and under garment lowered. My pizzle was hard and upright. I looked at Robin. He was ready, too. Hands were straight on each other's cocks and although we had spurted barely four or so hours ago we both gave good evidence of our youthful prowess as two good outflows dropped to the towel placed on the floor.

We both panted and took deep breaths as the exertion had been both swift and powerful. "We have matched Jabez so far," whispered Robin his chest rising and falling with regularity.

I gasped, too. "We must not tire ourselves by being too hasty. That was good, though." I laughed. "I have been hard since seeing poor Jacob's bare arse being smacked and he had a stiffness which no doubt he will have relieved once his father has gone."

Robin was grinning. "I saw that, too," he nodded, "but he repaid Isaac well. He did roar but was quite unharmed. They enjoy their games together as we well know but being crushed in Isaac's grasp is worrying as he is stronger than he knows I'm sure."

"I agree," I said, "He lifted us as if we were nothing."

Robin put his hand down and felt between my legs. "I do not think that Isaac has made you hang more. Your sack is looser than mine so I did expect to hear a mighty ringing just now as your ballocks were swinging until you were ready to fire your weapon." He grinned at me. "Then, like mine, they rise up tight."

Yes, that was something I had noticed so many times since my ballocks had loosened in their previous tight boyish sac and, though not hanging as free as Isaac's or Jacob's, and certainly not as low as Jabez's walnut sized pouches, I was proud that I could make them swing as I stood open-legged. But, that tightening each time I was near that point. Now Robin has said it also happens to him. We must investigate.

"I had not thought to question you about that tightness," I said, "It always happens with me. And it does with you?"

He nodded. "Yes, and sometimes I'm afeared my stones will disappear into me." He grinned again. "Especially when I go fast and forceful."

It was my turn to reach down. "They are both in their proper place," I said when I had felt the pair. "I wonder if that is something for all boys? It is not a thing I can question my cousin about and we can hardly ask Benjy and the other lads."

He was laughing now. "It is something you can ask Jabez about at New Year. He has no shame as we well know."

"Yes, he has always been most forward with his statements about the prowess and possessions of himself and others. I am sure he will have a good knowledge of such things given his experience of every boy of his acquaintance!"

Robin agreed and we gave up trying to count all who Jabez had said he had helped to their fulfilment. "And, no doubt, he will have pursued new partners in his quest for enjoyment of that kind."

But we both knew that care had to be taken as there were laws where some things were concerned but there were always whispers about certain persons and their likes.

We dressed properly again and as it was a particularly cold and wintry day we decided we would stay by the fire in my room for the afternoon and read and study. Two industrious youngsters! But we needed feeding to replenish our strength so crept down to the kitchen as if we had only just appeared to appeal for luncheon.

The kitchen was a busy place. Mrs Gray had a long list of duties for everyone as pies and puddings for the Christmas Eve dance, our Christmas Day dinner and sustenance for the riders after the Boxing Day Hunt had to be prepared. We watched as three fine geese, already plucked were carried into the cold room. I knew one of them would be going to Jenny and Steven Goodhew for their Christmas celebrations; the other two would be for the Servants' Hall and our own dinners. Benjy showed us very proudly how he had lined up the best bottles of wine and port in the pantry and would be serving the family and guests aided by Timmy and Jackson. I asked if he was senior footman now and was threatened with being ignored when my first glass was empty. Still we were not ignored now and were sent to the breakfast room where my father was already eating a great bowl of rich-smelling stew. He said it was much too rich for weak-stomached boys as it was made from the brace of hares Squire Matthews had kindly sent. Knowing Squire Matthews would have parted with them only as he was invited for Christmas Dinner I said at least we could sniff the scent! Father laughed and said we should set to or he would finish the whole tureen. My, it was tasty and we mopped up our bowls with great hunks of bread.

Father shook his head. "Boys and their bellies! I suppose you will sleep now like contented hogs!"

"Grandfather," Robin said, "What are boys to do other than eat and sleep. If not we would not grow into fine young men..."

"...Like my brothers and cousins," I continued.

Father laughed. "Do you include your cousin Rass? He is nothing but skin and bone. A fine brain, maybe, but he needs more flesh."

"He did have three spoonfuls of soup last time," I said, "That is one more than before and I think he had a sniff of the sucking pig and half a potato with a teaspoon of gravy."

"Boy!" My father laughed, "Have you no respect for your elders?" His chest heaved as he snickered. "But you are correct. He said to me that he was much exercised by the exhortation in the good book 'Look not upon the wine when it is red' and was loth to take more than a glass. I said it was also written that new wine should not be put into old bottles but I was an old bottle and wine of any age was not wasted on me. He is too much concerned with good thoughts he has no time to enjoy himself."

I liked Rass. Although he had, even to me, strange views, he was kind and gentle, and though his parishioners slept during his sermons, I knew they respected him.

"He has a very serious manner," I said, "But a most kind heart."

My father smiled. "I do agree and I must promise not to bate him. He is my sister's son and deserves my best sentiments, but he has a good chance of becoming an old curmudgeon that no one wants to know. We must find ways of lightening his path."

"Perhaps he needs to get married," said Robin, "Or does he still have hopes of a Fellowship? He told us at the Village Feast that he did miss Cambridge and hoped we had set our minds to go there to study."

"And he did eat more there," I added and then felt a little contrite as we were being serious. "I know his brother intends to visit his old College soon perhaps he could make enquiries."

"I would be sorry to see him go," my father said, "He has set up several families with their own small-holdings on his glebe land rather than to let them go poor when farmers do not want their labour and he has helped several wayward youths by putting them with families who do not countenance any nonsense. Yes, he has a good heart, but who would marry him as he is now?"

Our thoughtful conversation was interrupted by Benjy bringing in a silver platter with several letters on it.

"Your pardon, sir," he said placing the platter on the table, "Mr Clements said I should bring these to you directly and there is one for Master Tom as well."

"Thank you, Benjy," father said, "And ask Mrs Gray if there is any of her most delicious almond tart as it fills unwanted empty corners."

Benjy nodded and went out. Father looked at us and raised a finger. "The first boy who mentions Falstaff will..." He paused. "...will not have a piece!"

Rass was forgotten as Benjy returned almost immediately with a great slice of tart and was given a piece with a wink from my father and instructions to eat it before going back to the kitchen. The rest he divided in three and it soon disappeared.

I ate quickly as I wanted to see my post. At last father finished his third letter and I was passed my own missive. I recognised George's hand and pulled the page away from the seal. He was replying to my first letter where I had said Timmy was settled and that he wished to know about the old woman he had lodged with. Of course, George's other letter had come in between but now there was more news. He said that Black Jack had been taken to his father's London house where he was confined having been quietened of his madness by an eminent doctor. The doctor said he was under the influence of too much strong liquor and had been taking doses of laudanum even before being found drugged in the midden. He was raving less now but was still full of anger and vowing vengeance on the School and others. His father was also very angry in that several other fathers had written demanding repayment of money borrowed from their sons and this amounted to almost one hundred pounds.

When father looked at me quizzically I just said George had sent Christmas greetings and hoped the other letters and documents had arrived safely. The slowness of the mails meant my letter back had been crossed in the post.

He did not question me further as he was chuckling over three of his letters. "I have nothing but good news, too," he waved one sheet at us. "This is from his Uncle Wright who wants a matched set of six greys for his new carriage. It will be drawn by four but he wants six to rest two at a time." He shook his head. "Why does he want greys? It must be some new fad or fashion. He has always had good chestnuts before. Lucky for me I had those two grey mares and they have dropped good foals from that stallion of Vickery's each time. I'll make the old bugger pay a good price," he laughed, "But some discount if he supplies me with more of that good claret."

"Red wine?" Robin asked quietly.

A meaty fist was shaken playfully in his direction. "Must I suffer from the pair of you now?"

A second letter with an ornate crest printed on it was then held up. "This is from Milord your friend's father." Another chuckle. "Full of news! He wants eight good hunters to be delivered at Easter and he has a son who wishes to give up the country life and savour the rigours of army life. Not quite in those words but I can read between the lines. He has an idle son at home who has been warned. This son will need two good mounts as, wait for it, he intends to beseech my dear brother to accommodate him in his regiment!" He gave out a hoot of laughter and waved this letter at us.

"Does he say which son?" I asked, "George has two brothers at home, Augustus is the elder, and I think the second is named Geoffrey."

Father pointed to a sentence. "He says 'my son Geoffrey who has served in the local militia wishes now to take a commission in a well-known regiment of horse' that must mean William's rabble."

"I'm sure Uncle William would be pleased to have a brother of my friend George in the regiment. George is a good horseman and is brave and fearless. He is also good friends with his brothers so he told me and if Geoffrey is like George he would make a good officer."

Father laughed. "I think you had better be present when brother Billy interviews the lad and you could stand as a character witness."

"I have never met him," I said "But I do know his brother." I shook my head. "I don't think he's a 'lad', I remember George said he was thirty."

"Not married?"

"I don't think so. George said he lived at home and spent his time helping with managing the farms and hunting."

"Usual lazy whelp of a son, then," he said, "At least I've got rid of two of mine and Her Majesty helps pay for their keep. It does mean another seven years for the remaining infant still here but then he can spend his time physicking his poor old father in his dotage."

"But, father," I said, knowing how to respond to his taunts, "I would prefer to be a well-paid physician in London rather than mouldering in some tiny village treating old folk with their gout and churchyard coughs for a pittance."

My father feigned anger. "I do not suffer from gout and I am not yet ready for the churchyard! Robin, protect me from the disrespect of your uncle!"

Robin was enjoying the unusual degree of banter and had an inkling of my father's playful manners. "I would not dare to oppose my old uncle. As you well know he is a full day older than I am and must be wiser as wisdom is supposed to come with age but I sometimes have my doubts." He grinned at me. "Uncle Tom, you should respect your elders as your father says and cherish those younger, too."

"I'll cherish you, cheeky hound," I said, "But all this started when I offered information about my friend George's brother who, I am sure, would be most worthy of consideration by my uncle for his regiment."

"And as long as he needs good mounts I will support that!" said my father, "But I must leave you now. The older and probably less wise have to prepare themselves for yet another evening of pleasure. Another dinner and dancing afterwards at Lady Kate's just as last year and tomorrow the same performance at the Westrup's."

I knew both. Each was a fairly close neighbour. Lady Catherine Mortimer was a widow. Her husband had broken his neck in a fall about five years ago when hunting in Ireland. I had overheard gossip that Lady Kate was looking for a rich husband, as her late spouse had been a gambler and had been in Ireland trying to regain his fortunes by playing at cards with those who did not know him. At least their two daughters had made good marriages according to my mother, who felt sorry for the poor woman having had such a profligate husband. I had only seen Lady Kate once, at the New Year's Hunt two years ago. Riding side-saddle and with a top hat and veil she rode fast and skilfully and gave me a shilling for holding her horse when she dismounted. I must have looked like a junior groom!

The Westrups were a strange family according to other gossip. He had been sent to America as a young man because of some scandal but had made a fortune somehow and had returned, complete with an American wife and three young children, when his father died some twelve years ago. Although he had inherited a good deal of land his only interests seemed to be in adding to his already large mansion and his family, as he now had nine children who played havoc on his tenants' farm lands and poached more game than the real poachers did. I knew the two around my age, Claude and Clement, who at thirteen and fifteen were fearless riders but could not outrace my good steed Blaze. They were always smiling but were ill-educated as their father employed only old men or poor students as tutors. Those two and their two older brothers would be at the Boxing Day Hunt so I was looking forward to seeing them again.

"Will you be dancing with Milady Catherine?" I asked as I knew my father was partial to a well-set-up lady as my mother often said when smiling at his antics on the dance floor, "Mother says she is very elegant."

I got a sideways look. "What your mother says I must agree with. Lady Kate is a very handsome woman but seems unable to snare a new husband. I must look among my unmarried or widowed acquaintances and see if we can remedy that lack for her. Must have a good income though, I hear she has expensive tastes."

"Do not all ladies have expensive tastes?" Robin asked, "I have heard that, but would not know."

Father laughed. "You would soon know once you are married. There are always new fads and fashions. I doubt if I shall return from London after New Year with a full purse. I have seen the long list of new furbelows and fizgigs which his mother has prepared. Still as he has said he will take his flute and earn a few pennies on a street corner I shall have that off him to help pay for his mother's prodigality."

I put my hand in my britches pocket and found the shilling I had tucked there. "Father, please accept this as a token of affection for my mother. I would dread to see you out of pocket."

Robin was not to be outdone. He put a penny on the table. "That is a grandson's mite which I add with my greatest pleasure."

Father shook his head and stood. "Come here both of you." As we stood he put his arms round our shoulders. "You are the greatest credit to any father or grandfather. That third letter is from my agent in St Albans. I have been successful in bidding for a good part of an estate being sold there. I am minded to divide it equally in four and you two with Torquil and Terence will have a quarter each. You can then enjoy the income from the rents and see how far that will go when you are married, but use it wisely until then." He hugged us tight and all three had a tear in our eyes.

I realised I had already seen the map of the land as it had also been rolled with those of Cobblers Farm. But what a gift! I suppose we would be landed gentry now! Now I knew why Robin and the others had taken a coach which passed through St Albans. The important document must have been the bid!

Our evening was so happy as we had waved my parents off in their coach to Lady Kate's at five o'clock and we dined by ourselves at six o'clock with both Benjy and Timmy as our footmen. We said it would give them good practice in politeness and deportment when they had to deal with lesser mortals than us, like young Jefferson for instance. They agreed, though Benjy did chide Timmy when he picked up the decanter of my father's best brandy to pour into Robin's water glass as he thought it was a cordial. I said it was a forgivable mistake as the two liquids were of a similar hue. Having seen the state of young Jefferson after two glasses of the brandy I said it was not something for Robin to try at his tender age. Benjy said it would give him great pleasure to help me decorate a second helpless and hapless creature and made Timmy laugh as he explained to him why the maids still giggled when the name Jefferson was mentioned. We didn't tarry at the table as we had tasks to complete. Needless to say two more slow and careful outpourings took place before the fateful nine chimes of the church clock. We had wholly and most definitely bested Jabez! Something to boast about when I saw him at New Year.

Even so I was awakened in the dim light of the morning by a soft nuzzling and then, with slow and careful strokes, we drew a night's worth of heavenly liquor from, we confessed, rather tender though iron-hard cocks. We slept again to be awoken by a cruel Benjy who dripped water, admittedly warm, on our faces. Our labours of the evening and the morning must have tired us somewhat so Benjy was not given what he justly deserved but stood and sniffed as the smell of sweaty boys and their juices must have been evident.

"Well, well," he said, still wrinkling his nose, "Two young ruffians too tired to make their usual attack on a poor defenceless boy who only does his duty. I hope the single pitcher of water is sufficient to cleanse the pair of you." He sniggered and rushed from the room as we rather sluggishly roused ourselves to chastise him for not treating the newly raised 'landed gentry' to the respect they justly or unjustly deserved. We giggled at those thoughts though we had not told the pair the night before about our promised means. It was something to keep to ourselves until my father announced it to all.

At breakfast we found that Timmy had stayed the night with Benjy as the other young boys had been sent home to their parents for Christmas and even Eamonn had gone to the house at Cobblers Farm to be with his mother and the others of his family until Christmas morning. Benjy said they had all been given good food and presents to take with them and two of the young under-grooms were being instructed in the tasks of pot collection and emptying and how to keep from making Mrs Gray or Mrs Clements too bad-tempered with their incompetence in the scullery. He laughed and said the pair had been warned by Mr Clements that no fingers were to be laid on any of the serving-maids though in his opinion it wasn't fingers they wished to use. Robin said if they were at Mr Harrison's they would be threatened with having their widdle-pipes cut off so Benjy had to be regaled with that story.

Benjy pointed at me. "Master Tom only wishes his widdle-pipe was the length of that flute of his. Think of the merry tunes he would play on it then. None of the wenches would be safe." He sniggered. "I like that new word. Widdle-pipe, ta-ra, ta-ra!" he sang out as he hurried out of the room. Robin and I just grinned at each other. No wenches for us at present.

My parents were not in evidence all morning as they had not arrived back until after two o'clock and they had another ball to enjoy this evening while Robin and I would be playing our instruments for the Christmas Eve dance in the Assembly Rooms beside the Varley Arms. My father was more than grumpy when he emerged for his lunch and grunted a greeting at Robin and me who were sitting waiting. He was not in the mood to be questioned about the evening but sat and rubbed his belly and puffed his cheeks out as he was served with just a bowl of hot clear soup. I noticed he had a phial of Lancelot's stomach potion secreted in his jacket pocket and after growling at Jackson who had hit the side of the tureen with his ladle as he served him I assumed he had a headache as well. Robin and I ate as quietly as church mice and just bowed our heads to him and scurried off without even asking for permission to leave.

"I think the evening was a success," I said to Robin when we reached the safety of my room, "He supped and drank well and probably stood on her Ladyship's foot when he danced with her. We'll go and disturb my mother when it is time for tea but you are going to do two hours of good Greek now!"

We did try to make our learning more palatable by thinking of silly things. We agreed that 'algei ten kephalen' was a good description of my father's headache, 'he has a bad head', and he should be happy selling all those horses 'pros to sunphoron', 'to make a profit'! After trying to make sense of several irregular verbs we said it was enough and we lazed and read Oliver Twist to each other trying to use different voices for the various people especially when Oliver was asking for more.

That set us off to think what it must be like to be in a Poor House and being hungry. The drawing in the book showed thin and scrawny boys and I said they looked just like those poor children and the boy who had died. Robin said we must try to help others. I agreed and said how lucky we were but I had noted others at Ashbourne had treated the servants there almost with disgust at their existence. I said I had heard a big oaf sitting watching a football game shout at one of the young serving boys that if he didn't fetch another flagon of small beer he would flay the little bastard's back red raw and I felt it was no idle threat as he sneered at the lad quite evilly.

Robin said he'd also noted the two quite different ways in which he and the other grooms were treated. He did say Black Jack was probably the worst but there were others who shouted and swore if their steeds were not ready or there wasn't an available groom to attend to their wants.

That set us to thinking about our own needs. We assumed we would have our mounts with us. But who was to care for them? We would both be busy studying and Robin would therefore not be available as he had been for the past term. I said it was no good asking my father until he had recovered from over-indulgence in balls, dancing, rich food and strong liquids. Robin laughed and was of the opinion this might be some time as Christmas was still to come.

We heard the church clock strike four so crept past my father's room as we could hear him snoring and tapped on the outer door to my mother's boudoir. Marie opened it cautiously. She looked tired, as she had been to Lady Kate's as mother's companion, but smiled wanly and beckoned us in.

"Oh, mon petit Robin aussi," she said. She held a finger to her lips and nodded towards my mother's boudoir. "I think she sleeps," she whispered in English, "A poor head she has."

I grinned and said my father was the same. My mother must have heard our entry and called out that she wanted to see us both. "My head is not as bad as your father's," she said, "Her ladyship did have some good wines." She laughed. "Unfortunately I think they were wasted on possible suitors as there were several young officers around the room but no one of a suitable age and position for her." She said this quite freely as she knew I had been present when Lady Kate had been discussed by Aunt Matty in her forthright way and even old Squire Matthews' wife had expressed opinions as well.

"Mother," I said, suppressing a grin, "Were there no single men possessed of good fortunes?" Mother was fond of quoting Miss Austen whenever young ladies and their marriage prospects were being debated.

Robin was not used to this so looked rather bemused as I doubted if he had read any of the books which my mother and friends discussed and re-read and discussed again. I had tried two but tired of the old-fashioned language and all the talk of marriage and girls' concerns.

Mother laughed. "And I can assure you our Lady Catherine is nothing like Lady Catherine de Bourgh! Even I would have felt humble in that woman's presence. We are fortunate not to have acquaintance with anyone like her."

Yes, I remembered her and the supercilious attitude she had, as that was one of the books I had sampled. Even more overbearing than Mrs Matthews who prided herself that she was kin to some long-dead peer of the realm.

She turned to Marie. "Ring the bell, Marie my dear, I need some good hot tea and the boys look thirsty as well." Hungry more like it, I thought!

The parlour-maids must have been waiting for the summons as the two trays of cups and pots and small cakes were soon at the door. One of the maids scurried off to fetch more cups and I demonstrated my skill at pouring tea much to mother's and Marie's amusement when I said I had had that task when interviewed by Mr Ridley.

We were dismissed as soon as our cups and plates were empty as Marie had to prepare my mother for the fray she said. Dinner at seven and dancing until midnight but not so far to travel as last night. "I expect you will be the most beautiful lady there tonight," I said, "Any young officer would fall at your feet."

She laughed her happy, tinkling laugh and waved us out of the room. "As long as they don't fall over my feet I shall be content!"

Robin was in a pensive mood when we returned to my room. "I cannot believe that such a lovely lady is truly my grandmother," he said. His mood lightened. "And you are just my crusty old uncle!"

Nothing for it but a good wrestle over the bed and on the floor until so tired from tickling and tussling we just lay together giggling and clutching each other. "You will be too out of breath to blow that flute," Robin said. I just said he hadn't better exercise his fiddle arm before the dance as we both had bulges in our britches which would have to be dealt with later.

Robin had brought his best jacket and new dark cloth trousers ready to change into. We did forbear from any release as we knew we would have the whole night together with time enough then for wanton play so just changed our clothes which, I said, made us look like two young gallants with neat hair and no smudges on our faces.

Soon after the church clock struck five we went down to the dining room. Our places were laid ready and Lancelot was sitting there with Timmy pouring him a glass of sherry sack. "Boys," Lancelot said as we entered, "A small glass of this will help you play tonight." He winked. "But do not tell my father or he will say I am leading you into the paths of drunkenness." He turned to Timmy. "We'll talk more about preparation of tinctures when you come to the Rectory and I can show you my methods." He sipped at his glass as Timmy took up two more small glasses and poured some of the liquid for us. "We have also been talking about the list of herbs he can grow which will be most useful and I have plans to supply two of my colleagues in Stamford with better preparations than we are able to get at present from the old apothecary there. I fear his ideas go back to the Dark Ages."

"I thought all physicians and their cures still worked from before those times and back to the ancient Greeks," I said, "Mr Martin told us about Hippocrates and the four humours and said they were useful for putting boys into groups according to their characters."

Lancelot was amused. "That is true. I would say you are phlegmatic, whereas Robin is probably sanguine. He is more confident than you, but you are calm."

"So Squire Matthews would be choleric, as he is often bad-tempered," I said. I grinned at Lancelot. "I think your brother might be melancholic."

Robin sniffed. "I think that is all too simple. We are surely mixtures. I get hot and excited as well as bad-tempered, but I can be calm as well."

"You are quite right," Lancelot nodded, "Those old Greeks suggested those four not only to distinguish between people but, that when ill, the humours had to be brought back into balance. We still have some of those ideas as doctors still suggest blood-letting as a way of reducing fevers and so on as these are thought to be due to an excess of blood. I wonder sometimes if it is not better to use other methods as losing too much blood weakens the patient."

"But you used those leeches to draw the blood from that boy's hand," I said.

"I did," he agreed, "But there was a contusion of blood there where the hand was bruised and the blood was stagnant under the skin. I used the leeches but I could have used a scalpel to let the blood out but I have noted that often makes the wound worse and it becomes full of pus. I could have left it, but again, where there is much blood under the skin then a form of rot can set in. You learn by looking and not relying too much on applying the same means for each patient. The boy was healthy otherwise, but he had dirty hands. I have noted dirt and grime make wounds worse. The salt water cleaned his hand and helped it to heal."

"Like Mr Jarvis?"

"Yes, that wound in his arm healed quickly and there was no rot."

Timmy had been listening intently. "Sir," he said, "Mistress Campion had a herb she said was in the Bible and made a salve with that which was useful for cleansing wounds."

"Do you know it's name?" Lancelot asked.

"It is hyssop and it is rare but she had some in her garden," he said.

"Purge me with hyssop and I shall be clean," quoted Robin.

"Asperges me hyssoppo," said Lancelot and wrinkled his nose at him. "That is something I must try, I have heard it many times. We must get some for the garden, Timmy. Did she have others for cleaning wounds or bleeding?"

"Yes," he said, "It depended where." He dropped his eyes. "Perhaps I must not say one, but another was shepherd's purse. That smelled strange but was useful she said and easily gathered."

Lancelot smiled at him. "What one must you not say?"

Timmy looked first at Robin and me then at Lancelot. Lancelot saw this. "Do not worry, Timmy, Tom is to be a physician and I am sure Robin knows that people suffer from many ills."

Timmy hesitated for a moment. "Sir, Mistress Campion had a special salve for bleeding from behind."

Lancelot nodded. "For men usually after straining at stool?"

"Yes, sir, she was famed for this salve."

"Would you tell me what it was made of?"

"Sir, all my secrets!" Timmy was not humbled by Lancelot as Lancelot grinned at him.

"Timmy, you have skills and knowledge which many stupid old physicians and quacks would ignore at their peril. We have talked about that book and I know you have mastery of things I did not learn until I reached Cambridge. There are things I can teach you and things you can teach me. Tom can join us..." He laughed. "...and Robin can be our herb-gatherer and help with the digging."

"And get piles through straining!" Robin said. He grinned, too. He also knew what caused 'bleeding from behind'!

"And what would be in the salve for his ailment?" I asked "And we would ask Benjy to apply it!" Robin made a fist at me and the other two laughed.

"Good horse chestnuts," said Timmy. "I had to crush them and save all the juices and mix all with some new lard." He was enjoying himself. "I was not employed as Benjy would be but for Robin I might close my eyes and use a spoon with a long handle."

Lancelot was laughing but had to stop as one of the maids came to the door, curtsied, and beckoned Timmy to follow her out. I knew he would be bringing in our dinner.

As he went out Lancelot watched then smiled. "That boy has spirit and I will see he is set on the right path. He may be young but he has understanding of things which can only raise him above many who would think him as no more than a servant worthy only of condescension. Your mother must allow him to learn as well as work. I will take him to Cambridge as I promised and he will find out more about herbs from the physick garden there." He pointed at both of us. "And you must help as well. You have great advantage but remember there but for the Grace of God."

"Timmy has many gifts," said Robin, "I am aware I could have been discarded as worthless but I have great chances and I can see Timmy must have those, too. When I first saw him he was downtrodden and ill-used. He is free of that evil Jack now and that was like a freedom from slavery. I hope I have been a good friend to him and I will make every endeavour to maintain that friendship." He looked at Lancelot and grinned. "And I would happily dig but hope I am not considered a dumb yokel."

I laughed. "And what would you suggest for the piles that would ensue?" I asked Lancelot.

"I had heard of horse chestnuts but I would prescribe an ointment of good lard with elecampane and, perhaps, camphor and a touch of laudanum to give swift ease and then charge him a silver shilling for a small pot. He would have to pay Benjy a penny for each application." He held his first finger up and made stabbing movements. I clenched my buttocks as I knew where that finger was directed!

We stifled our laughter as Timmy and another of the maids appeared bearing trays with platters and tureens. The maid curtsied and left but Timmy remained and served us with slices of mutton, boiled potatoes and green beans which had been salted and kept in a jar from the autumn. The first maid returned with a syllabub and a plate of cheese with new bread. When finished Lancelot patted his stomach.

"I need to rest and hope that some fool doesn't take too much liquor and try to outdo his friends in some daring deed like that Colby boy at the Harvest dance who decided he would dive from the bridge into the river forgetting the stream was low and broke his arm and near enough drowned. You two, play well and keep out of the way of the more boisterous when you leave. I think Mr Clements will have his eye on things and I heard Phillips warning those louts at Squire Matthews' that he wanted them back before midnight or he'd whip them to church in the morning."

Oh, Glory! I had forgotten it was Sunday tomorrow and then Christmas Day on Monday so two services to go to. Mercifully Uncle Dodd did not usually tarry over the Christmas Day service and at half-past eight it was earlier. Sunday would be quiet as my parents would be resting after going to two Balls in succession. We left the table with Lancelot still talking to Timmy as he put the used plates together.

I was curious. "How do you know about piles?" I asked Robin as we mounted the stairs to my room.

He laughed. "It is a common complaint with horse-riders did you not know?" I shook my head. "Perhaps it is those who are older. You would have Mr Darlow treating you like Her Majesty herself if you presented him with a pot of Lancelot's salve." He giggled. "Perhaps I should have said His Royal Highness as you possess things which even Her Majesty lacks. Very useful and pretty things I would say."

I thumped his arm. "Pretty things? Mine is a sturdy rod."

He came close and whispered in my ear. "But you have a sweet and pretty rosebud at it's end which opens and displays an inner bud which is my delight..."

"...No more...," I interrupted, "...Or there will be vacant places in the band tonight."

He thumped my arm. "I agree. Later, then?"

We had to hurry as I was sure it must be near seven o'clock so we grabbed our instruments in their cases and ran back down the stairs and speedily put our hats and cloaks on. Luckily, Bobby had our steeds ready and waiting but we had to gallop along the drive with him urging us on and reached the Assembly Rooms just as the church clock struck seven.

It was a happy and joyful evening. Mr Flaxman and his sons were there with two casks of ale for the men and lads with plenty of cordial for the women and girls. There was some food but not the quantities of the Village Feast. I saw meat pies, cheese and pickled eggs and plenty of cut bread. There was much laughing as the young men quaffed ale and tried to dance. We started with 'The Hunting of the Fox' and kept the dancers active with all our merry tunes with just one slow waltz to give the older dancers a rest. I looked out for our pair from the forge and I saw Isaac happily dancing with Mary Ann and three other couples and the glowering face of Jackson who was free of duties this evening. He missed his chance for the next dance as he had a full tankard and one of the grooms stepped in and claimed her to make a couple but he did manage to elbow his way through the throng for a later 'Tom Tyler' and again for the final 'La Boulanger'.

I gave a couple of copper coins to the two young boys who had been standing outside looking after the horses. Poor boys looked frozen but they had a meat pie each to take home as well from Mistress Carter. I wondered if she had made the pies and whether they had horse balls baked in them as I knew four more foals had been gelded on Thursday. When I told Robin my thoughts as we got into bed he reached down and felt mine and said he wouldn't mind a nice pie made from them but he would need another pie soon after as they were rather small. He was punished for that as I rolled over him and tickled him until he was helpless. I couldn't punish him too much as I couldn't be unkind to my dearest friend. When he lay still I licked his lips and the tip of his nose and soon we were using our tongues on each other until we were turned head to toe, rosebuds were opened and both that night found our skins now easily revealed the inner most arousing bulb. With that new ease our juices were soon released and savoured. Twice more we revelled in our feelings and finally slept holding each other face to face.

Benjy was back from whatever errands he was on the night before and was in a cheerful mood. His news was that another of his sisters was to be married. She worked at the Squire's house and one of the huntsmen had been to see his father to ask his permission and Benjy said his father was relieved as that was another off his hands. Robin was very forward and asked if she was with child but Benjy said his sisters were not like that and the huntsman was a Strict Baptist. Robin said that didn't mean he didn't have a cock in his britches as most of the Baptists seemed to have large families and the boys he knew liked nothing better than having a tournament to see who was quickest at firing a volley.

"That's boys with boys," said Benjy rather haughtily, "My sister is not like that." He stopped and looked contrite. "I'm sorry, Robin, I forgot."

Robin laughed. "It doesn't bother me. My mother was the best mother anyone could have had and if my real father has been away so much I know he still regards me as his son."

I reached out and held him. "And you are lucky in that you have two good fathers."

"That is true," said Robin, "And I have two families as well and I know they both care for me."

Benjy was happier. "I know that. I am glad my family is like that, too. I am pleased my sister has been asked." He grinned. "John Wallis will be a good husband I'm sure. He wanted to be a soldier but his father forbad it and I think he would have been tall enough to be a Grenadier."

I knew who John Wallis was. Tall and thin but with a smile and a quip not like the usual Baptist. He would be there on Boxing Day keeping the hounds in check until they scented their quarry.

Benjy's other news was that there had been a mishap on the way to the Westrup's. Squire Matthews' coach had hit a boulder at the side of the drive just inside the gates to the mansion and it had lost a wheel. Luckily it didn't turn over and the Matthews were not hurt just shaken up. It meant they sat out of most of the dancing and were brought home in my parents' coach. Mr Roberts then had to drive on to the Manor to deposit them there. Benjy said he had heard the Squire had settled himself with an overindulgence in claret and would not be at church this morning.

That was a signal for us to rise and wash with questions being asked about our dance the night before. He was much amused at the pursuit of Mary Ann as he was certain she had her eye on Jesse Flaxman as he had a good future if he took over his uncle's inn.

"So it's not what's in his britches with him then as well," Robin said, "Even if it points skywards, downwards, whatever."

Benjy did laugh at that and said he would try to find out about the two brothers. When asked how he put his finger to the side of his nose and said he had ideas.

My father was not at breakfast. He did appear in time to walk to church between Robin and me but hobbled a bit. He was not pleased about the Squire who made them stop twice on the journey back to vomit most of the wine he'd poured down earlier. He was quite open about it as my mother had also excused herself from attendance saying two night's excitement was too much for a lady with her sensitive feelings. After he said that he just laughed and said she was just tired having spent the evening dancing with as many young men as possible and trying out all the new French dances which they had instead of the good old English ones.

"And your foot?" I asked.

He huffed. "Some elephant trod on it when I was made to waltz."

Robin giggled. "Not some sweet young lady?" he asked.

Father huffed again. "Boy, she was immense. I did not ask her but someone had marked her card with my name. I am sure it was one of those Westrup scamps. I know which one and if he's at the Hunt he'll feel my crop on his..." He stopped and raised his hat as we had reached the end of the drive and Miss Barnes was just alighting from her ancient carriage. "...Morning Ma'am," he said, without finishing his previous sentence.

Both Robin and I went up and helped her down as her two coachmen were elderly as well and neither had managed to get off the box at the front in time. She gave us a sweet smile.

"Oh, thank you, my boys." She peered at us. "I have great difficulty in distinguishing you but walk with me and see I don't trip." She must have settled in her mind who we were as she turned to Robin and said he should visit her before he went to school as she had resolved to give him a present. "I have a present for you, too, Thomas. I gave one flute to that good boy you brought but I have another. I asked Saunders to empty that cupboard and he also found a box with two necklaces I thought I had lost years ago so I am pleased about that, too. I think your sisters might like those."

Miss Barnes was always generous and I wondered if she might give me the strange carving if I stood and admired it. I didn't think my parents would approve and the maids would probably laugh every time they had to dust it. As Benjy would enjoy that task he could do it instead. I also remembered the lies Terence had told me and those thoughts as well made me smile as we escorted Miss Barnes to her pew and she thanked us kindly. I was still smiling as we left our cloaks in the choir vestry and Robin said 'Penny for your thoughts'. I said I would tell him afterwards as I hadn't told him about getting close to the carving. Perhaps he might have the opportunity too when we visited Miss Barnes. Oh, yes, he also had to see the boy with the cut cock screened by the portrait on the stand.

Peering over the rail I saw there were a number of empty seats but as the Squire was absent the churchwardens would not be reporting the absentees and Uncle Dodd would not be bothered as a village dance tired out many. At least there would be a full church on Christmas morning when the dole and Christmas alms would be handed out. The only excitement this morning was that two infants were christened and the godparents and parents got muddled and the boy was nearly named 'Martha' and the girl 'William' as in their christening robes they looked quite alike.

I would be in a lonely bed tonight as Robin was joining his family for Christmas. It was only fair but we would meet up again for the Boxing Day Hunt and would have two days before I had to leave to go to London for the New Year.

Our Christmas Day went quickly. Father was rested from a quiet Sunday and all the household, other than Mrs Gray and a couple of kitchen maids and scullery boys, walked to church for the service. A great surprise was when a very smart young man, young Philip, marched up to the Parish Clerk's desk to read from old Isaiah. His voice rang clear as he read of the prophecies of the boy to be born King. I looked at Robin who smiled and looked so proud of his younger brother. The Boy Curate he would be known as in future! At the end of the service I heard several people congratulate him when we gathered outside the porch after the alms and dole were distributed. I had read the board high on the wall of the church many times listing the offerings given by pious people in the past. One of the Varleys had bequeathed money for six poor men and six poor women to be given a new smock or shift and three other long-gone gentry had donated amounts for bread at Easter and Christmas. But the most valuable was that a shilling each should be given to thirty deserving families at Christmas from someone who has prospered in Stamford and needed his soul saved from everlasting torment as Uncle Dodd said.

The churchwardens had a list of all the recipients and men and women were lined up as Uncle Dodd supervised the handing out. I think every family in church received something, even if it was only a loaf of bread still hot from the baker's oven. But, even so, for some families with several children a large loaf was a blessing. I saw Mr Mead, the accountant, giving out leather purses to the men who worked for father as farm labourers, carpenters, bricklayers, grooms or stablehands. Mr Hine, the draper, had a wicker basket and was surrounded by small children who received warm socks or gloves until the basket was empty and all had something. I knew that the baker's ovens were not idle as families would have left their capons, fat hens, or even a goose to be cooked and collected later. The Goodhews were having the fine goose I had seen in our cold pantry and we were having the matching one while the servants would be feasting on the third. Everyone was very happy, even the younger ones in the band as my mother had given me a parcel of packets of sweets to be handed round at the end of the service. I gave a packet each to Philip and James as well and said I expected to see Philip in a preaching gown with bands at his neck at Easter. He grinned and gave me a rolled piece of paper. I was astounded. It was a fine drawing of me standing by Blaze. I said I would treasure it and knew I would. I said to Robin as we parted I would see him at the Hunt in the morning.

Back at Careby Hall all the family gathered for our Christmas Dinner. Presents were displayed and I had several, but the best was a new saddle for Blaze. My old one was comfortable but as I was growing fast I needed one which was wider and had larger stirrups and fitted Blaze better as he had also changed over the nearly five years I had been his owner. My father was most pleased with the cherry red waistcoat I knew my mother had bought for him on my behalf. I had found a silk scarf for her at Mr Hine's shop and a fine shirt for Robin there, too, which I had given his mother to keep for him the day before.

I liked Christmas as everyone was joyful and at Grace Uncle Dodd prayed for all of us and especially Robin and me, but also Terence and Torquil who could not be with us.

I found out later that Uncle William's regiment was being stationed at the barracks near the Queen's Palace and he had been promoted to General with Torquil now a Major and his equerry. I was quite tipsy as several toasts were drunk and even Rass was red in the face and laughing. I was told to have an early night as the Hunt would be starting at the Squire's at ten in the morning and pray for no snow! Benjy shared my bed that night and he was rather tipsy, too, as all in the Servants' Hall were celebrating and the ale and wine had flowed freely so he said. Two tipsy boys hugged each other and shared the release of their own fine liquors and slept soundly.

Two boys were wide awake as the church clock struck six, even after all the excitements of the previous day. I was washed and down for breakfast by seven and was hungry enough to have two platefuls of bacon, eggs and bread fried in goose fat. My father came in with both Lancelot and Rass, who had stayed the night in my brothers' old rooms, and even Rass had a plateful. He looked at his empty plate when he had eaten it all. "I think I have been neglecting myself," he said, "It will please Mistress Crowe my cook if I eat more of what she places before me." Having suffered the meagre portions served when I had the misfortune to visit him and stay for luncheon I wondered if the poor woman might have to find larger pots and pans to accommodate his new desires.

Father did not stint himself and demanded another plateful from an attentive Jackson who sported a rather nasty black eye and looked at me evilly when I was about to ask him for it's provenance. Lancelot was not so discreet and did ask. We all laughed when he said he had walked into a door which had been left open in the dark. "And how is the other fellow?" asked Lancelot. We guffawed more when Jackson said he would no doubt be calling on Lancelot for attention. Luckily Lancelot did not ask where as Benjy told me that evening that Jackson and one of the grooms had fought over who would be the beau of Primrose Cutts the very pretty daughter of one of father's under-carpenters. Benjy said he'd heard Tolly Potter had very bruised ballocks and was ready to give Jackson a taste of the same next time they met. "So he's not after Mary Ann now?" I asked. Benjy shook his head and surmised that Jesse Flaxman was the conqueror there and his information was that he had a bent pizzle as well but he had to find out more.

As he scraped the remains off his plate my father said he hoped his red tail coat would still fit as he only wore it on special occasions. As I had seen him go off in it at least twice since I had been home I asked if it had shrunk with the snow melting and making it wet. Lancelot patted his own stomach. Father glared at him, ignoring me, then laughed. "I suppose I do like my food but I promise to make a resolution come the Spring to take less." He pointed to Rass. "And you to take more!"

I excused myself as with the food and wine of the night before and the breakfast this morning I had urgent need of the privy. Oh, for when we had a jakes in every room, I thought as I squatted over the smelly hole but the relief was worth it. Back upstairs I knew I needed to be most warmly dressed as the wind had been cold just in that short journey to the outhouse. I didn't have a red tailcoat like most of the men who would gather but with my riding britches, leather jerkin and cloak I would be smart enough. Robin was already waiting with Bobby in the Hall stable. He had the biggest smile for me and I realised why as he indicated Silver.

"A new saddle!" he almost shouted, "I couldn't have asked for anything better."

I pointed at Blaze. "Me, too" I said. The saddles were a matched pair and I knew my parents had made sure their grandson would not be at all disadvantaged or wanting in his new venture as a pupil at Ashbourne. I guessed his brothers would have had good gifts as well as they would not have been left out of my parents' largesse.

I wondered, though, if the new leather would be as comfortable as that of my old saddle which had moulded itself to my shape and was softened with use. I knew this new one had been well-oiled and hammered but it still had to be 'ridden-in' and I hoped my backside would not be too sore after my first outings on it.

Just then my father strode up and a groom appeared with two fine hunters for father to choose from. These were both well-setup chestnut stallions, each with a hint of a white patch on his forehead. Neither Blaze nor Silver liked these intruders and Tarquin snorted his disapproval as well. Bobby quietened him with a stroke to his muzzle as he would be his mount. I wondered if the three sensed the others had parts they had lost. I would ask Bobby later if he thought this was so.

Father looked the two steeds over and chose one which was quickly saddled. It was a good choice he said as it was one of Invictus's best. We accompanied him the mile or so to the sweeping drive at the Manor where others were already gathering and the six couples of hounds were being restrained on their leashes by the kennel men. I recognised several of the red-coated riders who halloed their greetings as my father rode up. The four Westrup lads were there with their father and one of them, the eldest, had a fine new red coat with the others in black looking very smart. I saw my father in earnest conversation with old Colonel Neville who had a fine estate just to the south of ours. Before I could ride up to give my greetings to the Westrups my father rode up to Robin and me followed by a youngster on a good pony.

"The Colonel asks if his grandson might ride with you. He is not accustomed to hunting yet but wishes to learn." He winked at us out of sight of the boy. "The Colonel will be most obliged if you took charge and it means no recklessness, eh!"

We had already been warned not to take risks and I guessed we would be rewarded for the 'obligation'. We both nodded and my father rode off to where stirrup cups were being handed up to the riders leaving the lad behind in our care.

He smiled shyly at Robin, then at me. He then hung his head as his cheeks reddened. I knew I'd seen him before and he must have recognised me. I smiled as it was his other cheeks which were reddened then.

To be continued: