Tom Browning's Schooldays
By
Joel
Chapter Sixty
After dinner we went upstairs to find our chests had been filled even more while we had been absent. Jabez had made sure nothing was left behind and we had some of the sandalwood soap and packets of soft paper packed away as well. It would just remain that our nightshirts and the clothes we wore this evening would have to be found a space. We were too replete to do anything more but strip and fall into bed. We did kiss and hug but the good god Morpheus intervened and we both slept soundly until awakened by soft zephyrs. Of course, it was Jabez who was making Mehmet laugh as he blew his warm breath over our cheeks.
"Are they not a pair of fine young creatures?" he said very quietly to Mehmet as we woke. "Take care, though, they do snap and snarl worse than any mastiff if not woken gently."
As I was now fully awake I tried an imitation of the stupid guard dog at the Varley Arms. Robin added a yelp or two which made the pair laugh more.
"Sirs," Mehmet addressed us, "I cannot control him. He had said he would roll you both from your bed but I restrained him." He shook his head. "He does not behave as a good servant should."
"Oh sirs," the impenitent rogue put on a whining tone, "I do my best to please." He changed his voice to make himself sound gruff as a sergeant calling his troops to order. "Rouse yourselves! It is late and you laze in bed. Out! Out!" He pulled the coverlet roughly from us.
We roused ourselves and Jabez found himself rolled in the coverlet on the floor and two fine young creatures belaboured him as Mehmet stood and laughed even more than before. "Sirs, do not harm him!" he said but bent down and tugged at Jabez's left ear. "He woke me that way this morning," he explained.
"You were snoring loud enough to wake the dead!" Jabez riposted as he wriggled under our now tickling fingers. "I was minded to pinch your nose but you would have spluttered and spat at me." He looked up at Mehmet and smiled. "And you have such delicate ears."
We stopped our assault on his ribs and helped him up. He was in ordinary grey livery so no damage had been done to anything finer. He looked at Mehmet who had tried to help him, too, but we were quicker. "You are rightly puzzled when you say I do not know my place but I have teased and tickled Master Tom and Master Robin since they were no more than toddling infants. Is that not so?"
"Jabez, if we were to tell Mehmet all the things we have done together we would be here all day," I said, "We could not be different, eh Robin?"
"That is so, though some of the things he taught us would not be for such delicate ears as Mehmet's." He reached out and took hold of Mehmet's right ear. Mehmet stood stock still. "I would agree, Jabez, they are most delicate. Soft as Mistress Carter's conies though she has them fattened for eating."
I thought of Branscombe's caressing of Jabez's buttock. "Master Branscombe has that same intention for Jabez. I would be careful, Jabez, if you see him with a knife and fork!" Perhaps, after a fine sausage which would fill anyone's mouth more than comfortably. Those thoughts would have to be suppressed as we would now have to strip our nightshirts off to wash.
Jabez was now in charge. They had brought in two pitchers of hot water for us and Jabez said Mehmet should go and rouse the three youngsters as Karem and Paolo would have taken their water in for them. As Paolo was needed to serve breakfast Karem would need help for the lads as they washed and dressed. Ordinary day clothes for the journey was the order.
Visits to the water closet were needed first and once those necessities were taken care of washing and dressing took no time. Jabez dressed our hair neatly and tied our locks as if we were dandies at the Prince Regent's court so he said. We forbore to ask where he had heard such a description but agreed our hair would not get tousled on the journey. We both hugged him and said we would see him in the summer when he came to Careby with the Wrights. I slipped him two sovereigns which he tried to give back but I said he should share them with Mehmet and Karem. I also found a shilling which I said he should give to the boy William as he had looked so smart in his new livery. Jabez smiled and said he was so pleased the lad had been taken on in the other household. He then let out a snippet of information. We heard that if the romance blossomed then that house would be a home for Rosamund and Geoffrey. We were enjoined to say nothing. I knew I would not be able to say anything to George about his brother!
Two sturdy stableboys collected our chests and extra bags just we left the room to go to breakfast. It was Robin's turn to be benevolent. Two silver threepenny pieces were handed over to much bowing and thanks from the lads who seemed not much older than us.
All our entourage were ready to depart soon after eight o'clock after a hearty breakfast attended also by my father and Lancelot. Father was in a jolly mood and chivvied the younger lads to make sure their bellies were full as we would be travelling day and night to get to Careby before winter came again! I think that even Freddy gave a slight sneer at this. Cedric Branscombe was in the passageway outside Uncle Digby's study as we went along to say our goodbyes. Rosamund was there with her father and both were looking at a copy of a newspaper. Uncle Digby showed us the copy which had a mention of the wedding with a list of all the guests. We were all amazed when we read our names printed there. "I will get more copies for you and send them on the coach tomorrow." He held up the paper, folded it and handed it to Freddy. "You may keep that in case you leave Careby before the other ones arrive." He smiled at us. "There will be much talk today, no doubt, especially by those not listed!" As we came out Rosamund gave me a letter asking me to give it to George Lascelles from his brother. I looked at Uncle Digby and I was sure he closed one eye slightly.
Mr Topping and Mr Purrett were outside making sure nothing was left behind as we could see the coach being loaded through the open door. Lancelot appeared all muffled up and carrying a bag and a box. "We shall be rather crowded," he announced, "and I forgot to add these to my chest." He set them down and went to the study and I heard laughter as he and Uncle Digby said their farewells. It was then time to go. Rosamund came along the row and gave us all a parting kiss. Even Lancelot, who kissed her back and whispered 'All the best!' as they smiled at each other.
We had the Westrup coach again which accommodated us all with no difficulty though we had several of the extra bags inside with chests strapped to the roof and the back. Peters and Natty were on the box at the front and one of the stableboys, Jemmy Trodd we learned, was a postillion in case anyone took a fancy to the chests attached to the back. My father led the way on his mount as we left the mews behind the house and proceeded up Charles Street to skirt round Berkley Square to go up to the crossroads at Oxford Street and take the road which would lead to Barnet and beyond.
We were uncommonly quiet on that first part of the journey. There was much to think about and also to see as we passed the many large houses and then as we went on the road round Regent's Park to see newly built houses which Lancelot said were called villas. "London is expanding by the week," he said. "There are plans for more houses reaching ever further out into the surrounding villages. The air is somewhat cleaner there and I wish that Uncle Digby might be persuaded to have a house built say at Finchley village or on Primrose Hill but he is adamant he does not want to live so far away."
"All being well your invention will ease his breathing," I said.
"That is my hope," he patted me on the knee. "I am so glad the way was pointed towards Professor Bayes. I have every confidence he will make it all work. He has taken my design for the device to produce the vapour and his mechanic will construct it." He smiled. "He has promised a demonstration at Apothecary's Hall and at University College. We shall have a patent for it, too."
We talked on as the miles slipped by. He said he had a number of new receipts for medicines and would supply me especially with those to ease summer stomachs. I knew by this he meant those sudden urges to visit the privy with a great looseness of the bowels. I asked why these upsets seemed to occur more in the summer than the winter.
"I do not know," he said shaking his head, "It would seem there are ailments which go by the season. We have sneezing, running noses, coughs and, worse, the plight we call pneumonia, which all appear in the winter. In spring many still have running noses and sore eyes and then in summer there is what our rude friends call 'the shits'!" He laughed as he said that.
"Would that be the correct medical name for that condition?" I asked which provoked more laughter. "Are these not fleeting ailments, though?" I was thinking of those I had heard of who coughed up blood and did not last, or those who had lumps and pain and relied on laudanum to give them some relief.
"Tom, I would agree, most of these come and then go. A warm room or bed for winter and a dose of paregoric for coughs as well as for the runs. That balm I recommend for a disordered stomach is most useful and a somewhat agitated heart can be quietened with a tincture of digitalis." He shook his head again. "There are many other maladies which can be seen and are described after a death when an autopsy is made but we know not the cause nor the cure." He laughed. "I have read of a Dr Young who said that many physicians maintain there is but one disease and the best cure is brandy." He leaned towards me and shook his head as he said most seriously, "I have had patients whose only relief has been copious draughts of laudanum washed down with a beaker of brandy."
"So am I making a wrong decision to be a physician?" I asked.
"No, Tom, you are not," he said most emphatically. "We learn new things by the year, if not by the month. Even since I began my studies there are constantly newer ideas which make more sense. You will find there are many physicians who cling to what they learned twenty, thirty or forty years ago and have never bothered to think what harm they might be doing or whether they actually bring about a cure."
Cedric must have overheard that and repeated what he had told me about his grandfather being bled so much his father refused to allow himself to be bled.
"That is so," Lancelot said. "I have not bled a patient for nigh on five years but I do use my faithful friends to reduce bruising and swelling." Cedric looked puzzled until Lancelot did produce his glass phial of two leeches from a pocket in his voluminous jacket. "These are leeches," he said then nudged me. "I promise I did not have them in the Cathedral." He handed the phial to Cedric who looked at the almost comatose creatures in the liquid.
"I have heard of such things but have never seen them. How are they used?"
Cedric was then given a most interesting discourse on the history and the use of such useful creatures. Lancelot soon had the rapt attention of the other lads who all wanted to see his friends as he called them. The Goodhews and I knew that old Betty Parfitt collected his leeches for him and we had seen numerous of the fresh wriggling creatures but he had never told us such detail before.
Cedric handed the phial back and directed his next question to me. "Will you be equipped with a supply of these to remove bruises from those hit by cricket balls?"
I laughed and said I did not think so. Lancelot said I would be supplied with a good remedy for such things. I knew he meant arnica. Philip was full of questions about how one trained to be a physician and Lancelot asked if he was undecided about being an artist. He shook his head.
"I ask because that book of Leonardo's drawings show insides of people and I wondered if they were true and would Tom have to find out."
Lancelot nodded. "I am sure they are true. I have seen some of those drawings and I have also seen inside both men and women and if you wish to be a physician you must have that experience. Yes, Tom will have to look and find out." He nudged me. "Both Tom and Robin have seen me dissect a number of different small animals and it is a marvel how alike we and they are. We all have a heart, lungs and a stomach and vessels to carry the blood around." He looked at Philip who was hanging on every word. "It is not much over two hundred years since Dr Harvey described how our blood circulates and even then many did not believe him."
"That is true over many things," Cedric said meditatively, "My father has said that about the study of longitude. His chronometer is his most valued possession and never let him down when calculating a position which he could not do if there was cloud."
Again the boys were quiet and attentive as Cedric told them about the battles John Harrison had with the Board of Longitude and the many now quite stupid ideas men had put forward to determine a ship's whereabouts before it was proved that a chronometer was the most constant and reliable aid. He said his father always roared with laughter describing one notion about a 'powder of sympathy' which could heal at a distance. A wounded dog would be taken on board but its bandage was left ashore in Portsmouth, say, where it was dipped in a solution of the powder at noon. The dog on board would sense this and yelp thus giving the captain of the vessel the time of noon in Portsmouth to compare with the time of the place he had reached. He could then determine the longitude. Of course, it was a nonsense but people believed it.
Freddy was most astute. "Sir," he said addressing Lancelot, "That is the second matter I have heard about or seen while on this visit where people are led into false beliefs. That table and now this powder. Are there other things we should beware of?"
Lancelot was very serious. "History is full of false ideas. I only wish I knew what lumber I might be carrying in my mind which needs to be cleared. I have said about bleeding patients which in my opinion often does more harm than good. I read of new discoveries in the journal I take called 'The Lancet' which describes them. It is written for physicians by mainly those in a position of authority in a hospital or an university but I must still make judgements on those treatments which will do my patients at least no harm."
"Has it not been said that travel on these railways would be dangerous because people will not be able to breathe if the engine goes too fast?" asked Cedric. "I have not travelled on one yet but should I beware of such a calamity?"
I said I had travelled a short way and the engine drove faster than a horse-drawn carriage and I felt no distress. Lancelot laughed.
"I have taken the railway to Birmingham from London and felt no ill effects," he said. "There were two ladies who spent all four hours clutching each other but at last said it was more comfortable than being in a coach for a day and a half."
"So that is a false belief as well," Freddy said.
Lancelot said it would seem to be and he could foresee railways making travel easier between many towns and cities. He confirmed that within a year or two a railway line would pass by Careby and link to a track to London as well as to the north.
"We live in a time of great invention," Cedric said, "My father says there will be few sailing ships in years to come with more and more steamships being built. He has taken shares in two coal mines as he recognizes there will be a great need of coal for all new enterprises including the fuel for steamships."
I remembered Rowley's fear. With new means of travel then fewer horses would be needed. I wondered if my father had anticipated this. But then, in London where there were so many hackney cabs and the newer horse-drawn omnibuses there would seem to be little to worry about.
It was time for a stop for it was midday now as we saw on the church clock of the village we were about to pass through. My father banged on the carriage door with his riding crop. "All boys out! There is an inn ahead and the first one who enters buys me a tankard of ale!"
We all looked at each other. James laughed. "As I am almost the youngest I will go first and I have sufficient to buy Mr Browning even their best ale." I knew the three youngsters, as also Robin and I, had been given several coins by my aunts and uncles 'to see us on our way' as it was said.
True to his word James led the way straight into the saloon bar and caused the potboy to laugh when he demanded two tankards of his finest. There was more laughter when my father entered and was presented with his ale which he accepted and quaffed almost the pint in one great gulp. "My boy," he said, "That is the best ale since the last gallon passed down my gullet." He gave James one of his usual hefty pats on the back. James almost spilled his own tankard. It was a most agreeable ale and we sat as the innkeeper's wife bustled around and produced good cheese and bread which soon disappeared down hungry boys' gullets as well.
When back on the coach the ale had made most of us soporific so it was not long before five were sleeping and swaying with the movement of the vehicle leaving just Lancelot and me still awake though my own eyes were heavy. It was then I broached the subject which had bemused me even before we had left Careby.
I looked around and noted especially that Freddy was fast asleep. "Lancelot, this is gossip but I must tell someone," I started. He looked at me and raised his eyebrows. I suppose it was something new for me to confess to tittle-tattle. "It is about the dinner after the Hunt."
He nodded. "I was there for part of it but was called to a child in Wood Street who had a fit I remember." He realised I did not need to be told about another patient. "What is it?" he asked.
"Do you recall Mr Gowring was accompanied by a lady?" I asked.
He smiled. "Mr Gowring is always accompanied by a lady. As far as we know there is no Mrs Gowring."
"Do you remember what her name was?" I enquired trying to look serious.
He shrugged. "It was a short name, Last, West...," he paused. "...Yes, it was Mrs East. Is that not right? Why do you ask?"
"That is what I remember," I said, "However, I have been told her name is really Mrs Ingleby and not Mrs East."
This amused him. "I will not ask your source but I am not surprised," he said with a grin. "Mr Gowring is renowned for appearing with another in a succession of ladies at whatever function he may be attending. I went to the Stamford Mayor's Ball with Mr and Jefferson last year and he was there with someone who was not Mrs East."
This was good gossip. And if Lancelot was at the Ball was he with Millicent Jefferson? I waited.
"Gowring is somewhat of an enigma. He has good connections and has a fine house just outside Stamford I know he spends much time in London. He resides when there at a gentlemen's club in Park Lane I have been told. Torquil has dined there with other officers and has met him on several occasions." He laughed. "No ladies are allowed. I will say no more."
I wondered what he meant. I had no knowledge of gentlemen's clubs. I supposed I might ask Torquil but would not be seeing him for months now.
Before he relapsed into silence Lancelot did say most teasingly "There are gentlemen's clubs and there are gentlemen's clubs." He put a different emphasis on the word 'gentlemen' in both cases.
I suppose we both dozed then until another stop was called. It was past three o'clock by now and my father said the horses needed to be rested. There was a water trough by the road where they drank and stamped and neighed as Rowley also gave them some oats as well. We were nearing St Albans where my father said we would be staying the night at the Peahen. In the morning we would retrieve our own original four where they had been left on our journey down to London. My father suggested that we should all take a turn at being a coachman much to the amusement of Rowley and Natty. I said I would be first while James piped up and said he would be the second postillion at the back. I had quite forgotten the lad who was there. He had been with the other two at the inn but they had been served food and drink in the public bar so I had not had opportunity to speak with him. I thought it must be quite lonely perched at the back of the coach but he would now have James as company. No doubt all his life would be delved into by inquisitive James!
There was plenty of room on the box at the front and I was in command. Rowley said it was about time I started to earn my keep which caused Natty some discomfort. I was used to Rowley who was friend as well as servant so such seeming insolence was no bother to me. I cracked the whip and we trundled on.
Much to Rowley's amusement I told Natty I was now his equal in that I, too, had visited the British Museum. It was interesting how much he had retained from that previous time and it made me think I should look more carefully at things. He said he had talked to Mr Churcher, Uncle Digby's head coachman, who was well-read and went to an evening meeting each week, where a lecture would be given on all sorts of matters. Natty wanted to know if such meetings were held in Careby. I said I did not know but it was unlikely. I would ask Dr Lancelot or Uncle Dodd. Rowley then said he had heard of such in Stamford but he thought it might be at a Dissenters' Chapel there and he would be wary of attending such a place.
That also set me thinking. I had never really thought why there were Dissenters. We made jests about Zeb and his ranting and then there were the two Praepostors in Ridley House, Frobisher and Porter, who now attended a Chapel in Ashbourne. I knew some Dissenters called themselves Baptists and others were termed Congregationalists but I had not been curious enough to enquire further. Of course, Liam and his cousin were Roman Catholics and I had seen black-clad men in Stamford who I had been told were Quakers. Why all these differences? When we came out of the jeweller's shop Lancelot had said that he supposed the owner was Jewish as his name was Levy and Mehmet had said on my previous visit that his family were Moslem. All these thoughts would have to keep perhaps until I could raise such matters in Mr Ridley's classes.
An hour later and we were entering the London road almost into St Albans. Rowley was looking around and said the fields looked most fertile and the crops were growing well. He nudged me. "I hear we are landed gentry now," he said very quietly. Truly, gossip travels fast!
Although the Peahen was quite full of travellers we were assigned comfortable rooms. My father decided he and Lancelot would have separate rooms and we six boys were allowed two rooms. They were not large but as we would only be sleeping there it would not matter. One discomfort though was that ours faced the main road called Holywell Hill and the trundling of carts up the incline and the shouts of their drivers continued well after we retired to bed. Food for our meal was plentiful and Cedric said he was pleased he had been allowed a glass of sack but though I had tasted a drop or two of his portion I thought it too tart. I had a glass tankard of best ale which was dark and had a fine head so I was ready for bed and a good night's rest.
Cedric, Robin and I shared a bed again. It was wide and left little room to pass either side of it and we had to hunt for the chamber pots which we found were in a hinged cupboard under the front of the bed. Still, the water supplied was hot and plenteous so we were clean to bed. I was placed in the middle by the vote of Robin and Cedric who said I was not to fidget and disturb them. I do not think I moved an inch as I was soon asleep having decided the carts were fewer after the eleven o'clock bell tolled.
I must have turned in the night as when I woke in the morning I was face to face with Cedric who was holding me tight to him though he still slumbered. Robin was behind me and had an arm over me, too, and was pressing a stiffness into me which I could feel through the two layers of nightshirt. When I moved away a little it meant I was confronted by an even larger and harder rod which more than matched mine as I was in my usual state of morning arousal. I winced. There was no relief to be had as there was no water closet in the room and I could not seek release by my usual way. It was then my breath began to deepen as I realised I was near to spurting. Before waking Cedric's movements against me must have made me reach that point of sudden release. Without further thought from me my hips bucked and I breathed in even deeper with my juices squirting most copiously. I was quite aware that the same was happening to Cedric. He gave a low moan and our thighs crashed together and he held me even tighter. All these movements were echoed by the body behind me. There was a sharp intake of breath and Robin thrust forward.
Robin woke and a throaty whisper of 'Oh, shit!' sounded just by my ear as his head was resting on my shoulder. Cedric was now awake. His realisation of what had happened was immediate. Both of us were still moving fitfully as our individual tensions reduced.
"Two at once!" he whispered and then sniggered.
Robin's hand dropped down between Cedric and me. He must have felt the dampness. Another snigger as he added, "Three!".
There was no shame between us after that as we laughed and embraced each other pressing unclean nightshirts together until we divested ourselves of those cumbersome garments and tumbled together naked and merry.
Cedric slapped us playfully as we rolled around. "This is not a pastime for Ashbourne I fear," he said as his now softened peg drooped over my hip and I clutched at Robin's still rather rampant tool. We had then to desist from anything further as there was a clatter outside the door. We hurriedly pulled the coverlet up over us again as a knock on the door heralded the arrival of hot water for our morning ablutions. Two grinning boys entered on our command. Each had a large pitcher of hot water.
A window was quickly opened and the cold water from the night before was poured out. "That should get the old bugger a wet head!" the taller of the boys said on setting his empty bowl down and closing the window. "'Tis an old ranter who takes a piss against our wall for he abhors the good ale we sell."
Robin sat up in the bed. "He pisseth against his own hurt would you not say?"
The lad laughed. "Sir, I have read that and it is so I would agree. That water will wash him and his deeds away."
We had to laugh and Cedric was most amused. "You are well-read, young sir. I have seen that text but never heard it preached on."
The lad clapped his hands. "I would be afeared to tell the reverend that he should."
On further questioning we found they were the sons of the inn-keeper's sister and attended the school held in the abbey church. Both were well-spoken and did not have a great deal of the burr of the stable-lads we had left our horses with the night before.
"That water will be cool if we stand a-talking," the shorter and younger one said. "Are those three brothers of yourn in the other room?"
"Two are my brothers," Robin said. "Give them a sprinkle of water from us if they are not awake."
"And those gennelmen in t'other rooms. Are they kin?" the elder questioned.
"My father and my cousin," I said grinning at the inquisitive pair. "Take care as I am sure my father takes his riding crop to bed in case robbers attack in the night."
"Then he would sleep through from the snores we could hear," the young one said.
"John, do not say that! Sirs, we have a good watchman who sits on the stairs all night and two fierce dogs above the cellar door," the other assured us after reproving his brother.
They bade us good morning and left after Robin had promised them a coin when we saw them below.
It was time for us to rise, but not in the sense of happenings earlier. I rooted around in my night bag and found a better soap than even the quite reasonable specimen from that supplied the night before. We soaped ourselves and washed away all evidence of our morning's wantonness with Cedric whistling a merry tune.
We bundled our nightshirts into our bags and Robin said it was not he first time he had dampened his when younger. Cedric laughed and said it was certainly now not true since he had been at Ashbourne. Robin said nothing but screwed his nose up in response to that. I wondered if the incident would be relayed to Maitland?
The nearby clock struck seven and we made our way downstairs as my father had instructed us the night before that we must be off by eight o'clock. We filled up on boiled bacon, bread and hot posset before we mounted the coach with Robin now as assistant coachman and Freddy as a second postillion. Robin was good to his word and our servers and water boys had a penny apiece.
All had been in good humour at breakfast with my father asking if our London fleas had met the St Albans fleas and were biting each other rather than us. Philip said he had found one but he thought it might be a Frenchie as it had leapt away before he could crush it. It was this that the three had been giggling about as they appeared for breakfast. Freddy had told them the night before about being searched for hoppers so the Goodhews had repeated this until Freddy was exhausted from laughing at the tickling and all had fallen asleep most quickly.
Lancelot said he would hire a mount and ride along with my father. I thought he might have tired of boys' company but spying on the pair through the coach window I could see they were discussing some weighty problem though my father was laughing at times. Our journey in any case was slow as there were many carts and conveyances in both directions. Time passed for we heard from James that he had found out all about the lad who was riding postillion. Jemmy Trodd was a ploughman's son from the same village in Essex that Mr Churcher came from. His desire was to join the military when he was old enough being fifteen now. He had been inspected by my brother Terence and found to be sturdy and was quite adept with draught horses having helped with ploughing. However he had not ridden much so was being sent to Careby to be schooled along with the new colts as James said with a grin. If he proved himself he would be enlisted as a trooper in my brother's company.
Cedric was most amused at this. "I suppose if I cannot be a midshipman I might be a Cornet of Horse."
Philip had sized Cedric up. "I doubt it Master Branscombe," the young rogue said. "I think from the noise you make you would be Her Majesty's Privy Trumpeter!"
Cedric roared and lurched forward and grabbed Philip. "And I will make you the Bum Bass" he said as he gave the lad three smacks to that portion of his anatomy.
Our journey was thereafter punctuated by attempts at more and more outlandish plays on words. James decided if Branscombe could not decide on his way in life he could be a huntsman with his Horns on a dilemma. Cedric was not beaten. "I might then Fiddle along on what my father might allow me as a pittance."
After Philip suggested if he was still minded to be an officer he might be a Drum major I said nothing would come of it for we couldn't keep Harping on all the way to Careby. I was booed heartily.
My father was getting weary of the slow progress. After stopping for a bite to eat at midday he said we would not be arriving at Careby until the next day so we would find another comfortable inn for the night. I was second postillion for the afternoon and found Jemmy to be another well-brought up country lad. He related that crops had been poor the last year or so and that had decided him he did not want to remain and be a burden on his parents for wages were low if work was scarce. Again the railway was a topic, for the farm his father worked on was to be cut almost in two with a further line as far as Ipswich. The landowner was pocketing a fair sum, the lad said, but fewer acres of farmland meant fewer opportunities for work. I enquired whether there were positions associated with the workings of the railway. He said he did not know but had heard there would be gatekeepers needed to make sure cattle did not stray onto the rails and men in boxes with signals who allowed trains to proceed.
We were weary of travelling when my father called a halt nigh on six o'clock. I never found the name of the village but the inn was more than adequate. That is, except we did collect more than a fair share of fleas. Luckily, Lancelot was well-prepared and each of us received a coating of pennyroyal before climbing into our beds. Again there was ample room so Robin, Cedric and I shared with the others apportioned as before. Several rude remarks were made between we three as our now dry nightshirts were donned. There was no repeat of the previous day's events for we were woken soon after six o'clock in the morning as my father had decreed we must make an early start.
At breakfast the landlady was not at all concerned when James showed her that he had a line of flea bites on the calf of his leg. "They are not ours," she said with a laugh, "If they were you would have lost half your leg!" She gave him extra bacon as recompense. We all got a second helping even though the rest had fewer battle scars to show!
I borrowed Lancelot's mount for this last part of our journey as he said he had not slept well. I noted he had two swigs of one of his remedies at breakfast. "I am somewhat disordered," he declared as he had the second draught.
My father was not too consoling. "I told him not to have that extra helping of fig pudding. Loosens one's insides I always find and I did not partake of it," he said as I rode up beside him. I had noted that Lancelot was the only one to have that comestible as we others had all chosen a good plum duff and had followed that with a piece of treacle tart slathered in fresh cream.
Father was in a good mood himself though he did grumble that we had not travelled further the day before. "We will be at Careby by midday if we can keep this pace." I then remarked I was looking forward to being home if only for one night. He nodded. "You have enjoyed yourself in London, eh?" I said that it had been most enjoyable and most memorable and I was pleased about Philip and Freddy. "We will make sure all things come right for them." We rode some way on with the coach making good headway behind us. "Lancelot tells me he has plans for a journey to France. He asked if I would give permission for you to go with him."
I realised this must be about returning the head. Was returning the correct word? I surmised that the body of the Duc was lost. Would I be prepared to venture so far from home? I thought of all the travels my uncles had made and even Lancelot had studied in Paris.
"If Lancelot wants me to accompany him I would willingly go," I responded most bravely.
"You know why?"
I said I did which made him laugh as I said Robin had felt faint when he saw the head in its jar.
"I am not surprised. The rogue told me about it when he returned once from Cambridge and I was curious. I admit I have seen a few dead 'uns but not a bit of one like that!"
"Would Robin be able to accompany us?" I enquired carefully.
"That is something for him to decide after Lancelot speaks with his parents. You want him with you?"
I said he would be my choice of companion for such an adventure. I asked how things might be arranged but all my father said it would rest with Lancelot who had a good friend in Paris. I thought then that the Johnson twins might also be able to help. From further discussion with them I had learned that their father, based in Calais, had extensive connections mainly with the wine and cheese trade as he imported these goods into England. On this visit to London I had told Uncle Digby of their address in Calais since he bought quantities of wine and spirits direct from France. He said he would enquire though he felt he knew the name Johnson. When he smiled as he said that I surmised he knew the name of Johnson very well!
I had no chance to talk with Lancelot before we reached Careby. This we did just at eleven o'clock as the horses must have sensed they were nearing home and could hardly be constrained from trying to break into a trot which would have unsettled the coach as well as its occupants!
We joined the High Street which meant we would be passing close to the Goodhew home. The Goodhews were eager to see their parents so all us boys, including Cedric and Freddy, disembarked from our man-o-war, as Cedric had christened it when he had first seen it in all its full glory. My father said he would arrange for baggage to be brought for the two young ruffians who bowed low and thanked him most graciously for all that had happened. Lancelot remained on the coach and said he would soon recover.
We knew that good news would have already reached the family for Aunt Fanny had put letters in the mail on Friday evening after Philip had met Mr Eastlake at the National Gallery and had been accepted for the Royal Schools. The fast mail would have reached them at least by yesterday morning if not before.
What a reception! There were smiles, tears, laughter and a libation of a hot posset for all as we toasted not only Philip's good fortune but Freddy's too. Of course, time had to be found to tell of the wedding and how they had been active participants. Cedric and I left Robin and Freddy who said they would return to the Hall when the baggage had been delivered. We both clambered onto my steed which seemed quite used to having more than one rider. I let Cedric have the saddle while I rode bareback behind him holding on to his cloak. It was now past midday and we were both hungry but had first to have the usual piss. Benjy was standing by the side door when we left the mount with the waiting stable lad.
"Welcome home, sirs," he said. He saw I was twitching with the need for a privy. "All is prepared." He lead the way as we followed most quickly along the passageway and up the staircase. He flung open the bedroom door. Cedric pushed me forward. I was to perform the opening ceremony. I pissed loud and long and buttoned myself. I called to Cedric to add his contribution and waited outside the open door while he did so. I joined him when he finished. Benjy pointed to a lever as we had seen and used at Charles Street. I pulled the lever and water cascaded into the pan.
I looked at Cedric who was grinning. "We have christened the pan," I said, "Like one of your ships!"
""And blessings to all those who..." He paused. "...shit in her!"
Three boys howled.
To be continued:
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