We Admitted It

By moc.loa@kriWtniaS

Published on May 23, 2000

Gay

Rules suck! (unless I make them myself and this time I did)

Rule 1: This is FICTION! Do you people understand that? Hmm? Good. Rule 2: Fiction means that its NOT real. (but I can hope can't I?) Rule 3: I have yet to meet the BSB and couldn't really tell you what team they bat for, so this is not to try and assume anything about them, just to enjoy. Rule 4: Redundancies are to be tolerated only by me. ('cause I said so!) Rule 5: If you ARE the subject of this story you can just tell me if you liked it. Rule 6: You MUST be of legal age to read this! (21/18 whatever) (like you'd really leave if you aren't, but I have to tell you to anyway) Rule 7: I would enjoy a comment or two especially seeing as how this is the first time I am writing with the intention of a mass audience so you can jot me a note at 'saintwirk@aol.com'. thanx

Again...Rules Suck! So here we go....

Brian was there.

'So this is the part where things get better right?' I thought to myself.

Not that my day was really that bad; it just wasn't good either. At least not until I got out of work and found my way here. I thought about why I came here and realized that it was a good thing. Not my moving to Orlando last month, though that was good, but my coming here to the Ale House. I guess I should be thankful that my two roommates that work here at the Ale House were off tonight. Probably still out on that double-date.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised that I ended up here tonight. After work the whole place tended to end up here and, if we were lucky, watching Amanda bug Chad while he was at work. Its so cute when people are engaged but its really funny when you live with both of them. Especially when there are two more people in the same two-bedroom apartment.

You'd think that five people living in a two-bedroom and with three of us working at the same place, and the other two working together as well and with both places being within a mile of each other that we would try and commit murder on a regular basis. Actually the opposite was true. Most of the time.

Anyway, now that you understand that... Where was I?...Oh, yeah...

I looked up with a slight smile on my face that suddenly became a huge grin and thought that it definitely was were things started to get better.

'Damn! He is just SO cute!' I thought. ' But why does he look so familiar?'

'Maybe because his face is on the C.D. that your little brother stole from you because he like it and because it reminded him of you?' I asked myself. 'Ya think?!' I replied.

I am a true smart-ass to the core and just can't pass-up an opportunity like that one. Not even when I'd be ripping on myself.

I glanced up again and noticed that not only was that indeed Brian "We all know he's the cutest in the group" Littrell, but he was staring right at me. At least it appeared that he was. I turned away shocked by the enormity of the situation and for a general breather. When I turned back he was gone.

'Damn! He left.' I started thinking. "Like he was looking at you anyway"

"I was."

I Looked up very quickly while my mind tried to process the fact that a) the cutest guy in the Backstreet Boys was talking to me, and b) I said that last line out loud.

"Why?" It was out of my mouth before I realized I had said it.

Chuckling slightly he responded "Because you captured my attention. Very few people do that anymore."

"Me?" I cocked an eyebrow at him. "What was I doing that was so interesting?" I REALLY wanted the answer to THAT question.

"You were just looking so intense. What were you doing?"

"Just thinking." I said with a puzzled look on my face.

"I kinda figured that. But what about?"

"Everything and nothing. Nothing much important anyway."

"Then did you start smiling right before you noticed me staring at you? Speaking of, sorry about that. It was kinda rude to stare."

'Honey you can stare at me all you want to.' I thought to myself and then actually said, "I started thinking about my little brother and how jealous he's going to be of me when I call him today."

"Why is that?" Brian so innocently inquired.

"Oh. Well, because I just bought your 'Millennium' CD. Though I think I have a better story to tell him now."

That brought a big smile to his face. "Your little brother is a fan of ours as well is he?"

"When I moved down here to Orlando last month he asked if he could borrow the two CD's I had from you guys."

"Two? We only have the one out. Why would you need two copies?"

"You mean you only have the one CD out here in the U.S. I was just in Europe recently visiting some family for the first time and picked up the European version of this same CD."

Now it was his turn to wear a puzzled expression. "Why?"

"Um, because I like your music maybe?" I said surprising myself that I was comfortable enough around him to revert to my smart-ass mode so quickly.

"Do I detect a smart-ass here?" He grinned at me.

"Better than being a dumb-ass." I stated.

"True. But seriously..."

"Seriously I really enjoy your music. "

"Well, that's good to hear." He said smiling again. "Hey what are you doing for the next little while?" He asked with that little grin beginning to spread over his face.

"Nothing much." I replied.

"Good. Then follow me."

"Excuse me!" I said as I choked on the water I was drinking as he sprung that on me.

"Well, you seem like a cool guy so I thought we could continue this conversation, but in a setting where I don't have to worry about people recognizing me."

"Oh. Okay." If he wanted to take my away I'd follow him. Period. Especially to tell this story to my bro.

"This place is safer than most because I've been coming here for years, but people are starting to find that out so I'll have to stop soon." he responded to my unanswered question.

"Sure. I can imagine what you mean." I said to him

"Then follow me"

So I left my money on the table and did just that. We went outside and he motioned me to follow him over to his car. Noticing that it was a rental I just arched my eyebrow wondering why he rented a car when he lived here.

"I didn't want anyone recognizing my car." He replied to this unasked query.

"Makes sense to me"

"Good. Now jump in and lets go."

"What about my car?" I started to protest, but he cut me off stating that...

"I'll bring you back."

'How could you argue with a face that adorable?' I thought. I can't. "So where are we off to?" I inquired

"This little park that I know of..."

I sat back as we made our way out of the parking lot and down towards the 4.

"So what kind of music do you listen to?" he asked, "Besides mine of course!"

"I listen to almost everything."

"Cool. Me too. Pick a station and get some tunes on. 'K?" he looked over as he said that.

"No problem." I said turning the radio on and finding it tuned to my favorite station. "Perfect. I love this station." I started to notice the song that was going and blurted out, " I love this song!"

"You like the Venga Boys?" Brian asked me with a quizzical expression on his face.

"Of course!" I replied, "Don't you?"

"Well yeah. Its just that not many people have acquired that taste yet."

"If you say so." I cracked a grin as I said that.

"What?" Brian asked me.

"I like this song even more." My grin becoming wider as I realized it was a great cover that I liked better than the original of 'Blue Monday' by Orgy.

"I don't think your allowed to like Orgy and the Backstreet Boys. Its against the rules." Brian said wagging his finger at me.

"Well, I'm the exception, not the rule." I pointed out to him

"So I'm noticing." Brian said.

'And what, exactly, did you mean by that?' I thought.

"You're just NOW noticing?" I said with a look of mock surprise on my face.

"Observant aren't I?" Brian asked

"A regular Dana Scully" I said in reference to one of my favorite shows (If you don't know what show I'm talking about I don't want you reading this anyway. j/k)

"I should at least get to be Mulder. He's cuter" Brian retorted

My eyes jumped out of my head and it was my turn to stare as my jaw dropped to the floor.

"Did I just say what I think I said?" Brian asked, the worry creeping into his voice.

"Uh, yes you did." I said my eyes still riveted to his face

He looked into my eyes and pleaded with me, "Please don't tell anyone about that. I can;t believe I just did that.. I mean- I guess-" he stammered.

"You mean that as much as you had no intention of saying that it just popped out because our conversation was already becoming familiar territory and you felt surprisingly comfortable in my presence and didn't realize that I had not in fact known you for years now." I ventured

"How? How did you know?"

"Because that is exactly how I'm feeling right now." I said taking a deep breath to gauge his reaction my words. Brian looked at me for a second then started to laugh. " He Is cute though." I offered.

Now it was his turn to be surprised. " You mean?"

"Yes Brian. I'm gay."

He just sat there looking at me until I had to speak-up "Would you like me to drive?"

"Huh? No. Why?"

"Then would you?" I said nodding my head in the direction of the road.

"Oh. Sorry." He stated as he turned to the road then back to me and then back to the road.

"No worries." Yeah right!!! My mind was REELING with possible scenarios.

Brian took a moment to compose himself then looked at me saying, "I'm gay."

"Is that the first time you've said that out loud?" I asked him

"Yeah." He replied meekly, "It is."

"Same here." He seemed more relaxed knowing that I too had never admitted that out loud. Not even to myself.

"Don't worry. I won't tell anyone." I assured him.

"Thank you." Brian said to me as the tears started to cascade down his adorable face. "Thank you."

"Hey. That's what friends are for. Don't worry about it."

Fortunatelyfor us we had just pulled into the parking lot of our little park as he began crying so we got out and started to walk.

" I...."

"Brian, it's fine. but wait 'til we sit down before we talk."

He nodded his agreement as we climbed to the top of the slides and sat on the connecting tubes of plastic,

"You don't know how long I've wanted to say that to someone." He said looking into my eyes."

"I have a pretty good idea. I think" "Why don't you tell me more? I'm a great listener." I stated

So Brian and I talked. About everything. About what it was like trying to figure this out. About if we wanted to tell anyone else or not. About how this could affect things for him. What it was like growing up where and how we did. Everything. We told each other our lives. We spent three hours up there just talking before we realized both how much we had said and how much more we had to confide.

"Wow!

"You said it Brian."

"We both said a lot" He stated.

"True. Lets get going"

"Yeah, we can finish this up in the car."

And so we drove back to the place it all started for us that evening.

As we pulled into the parking lot next to the only remaining car there, namely mine, Brian turned to me. "Thank you. It was great talking to you like that."

"That it was and thank YOU." I said while looking into his eyes. "Here's my phone #. Call me if you want to talk more tomorrow."

"I will. I will."

"Take care of yourself." He said to me.

"You too."

And he took off.

Who'd have thought he really would call the next day!

Well?!?!?!?!?!?! I can CERTAINLY write mroe. Let me know if you like it, or if you don't. Thanx for reading it. saintwirk@aol.com

Next: Chapter 2


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