Love and Music

Published on Apr 13, 2004

Gay

Love and Music - Chapter 13

Love and Music

BY: [Wildheart](mailto:wildheart407@runbox.com?subject=love and music)


Subject: Boy bands

Rating: PG-13 to NC-17

Disclaimer or CYA Statement: THIS STORY IS COPYRIGHT 2003 BY WildHeart. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. DISTRIBUTION FOR COMMERCIAL GAIN, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, POSTING ON SITES WHICH REQUIRE PAYMENT TO ACCESS THE SITE, DISTRIBUTION IN BOOK FORM (EITHER AS A WHOLE OR PART OF A COMPILATION) FOR A FEE, OR DISTRIBUTION ON CD, DVD, OR ANY OTHER ELECTRONIC MEDIA FOR A FEE, IS EXPRESSLY PROHIBITED WITHOUT THE AUTHORS WRITTEN CONSENT. THIS IS FICTION>>>> IT IS NOT REAL >>>> I HAVE NO IDEA IF ANY CELEBS ARE GAY!!!

This is a story about friendship, love, romance, and family. While it will in time, also include making love, this is certainly not a sex story. You really should be legal to read this story and of course if you are not, then at least do not get caught! Seriously, by reading this story you are agreeing that you are in fact of legal age, where you live, to be reading it. You may contact me at: wildheart407@runbox.com if you have comments, suggestions or whatever.

This story is being written with different points of view (POV), first person, and third person (narrator). The changes in POV should be easy to follow as I will clearly mark them.

NEW WEBSITE: There is now a Love and Music website, where you will be able to find my stories and in time, many other great stories.

Love And Music Website

PICTURES: Love and Music now has PICTURES! Click here to see them! Special thanks to Erotic Dreams for doing the profiles for me.

AUTHORS NOTES: I have opened a yahoo group for this story and any other that I write and any others that anyone would like to allow me to use. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/LOVE-AND-MUSIC/ I would rather have stories about love, romance and or friends and family. I also hope to build a web site sometime soon, and would REALLY like to host other stories on that site, so if you have a story and would allow it to be posted, let me know. If anyone out there would like to help me with the web site please let me know.

Hey everyone, the story is now being hosted on the Erotic Dreams Story Archive. Thanks to Erotic Dreams : - ) for allowing my story to be there!! The direct link to my story is: My Story, and to find not only my story but also many other great stories, please check out the rest of the archives by clicking on this link: http://gay.eroticdreams.us/

You can also find my story on JT Poole's Site. Thanks for hosting it JT.

My Story is the direct link to my story. You can find lots of great stories on the site: http://home.nctv.com/jtpoole9/hosted.htm


Notes: Thanks to Dreamy for doing a great job of editing!


Danny's POV

For some reason I had been thinking a lot about the past recently, and I knew that I had one major regret. I just never had the courage to talk about it with anyone. Hell, I had never had to courage to talk to the person I hurt, let alone anyone else.

I told my lover, Bastion about it, finally. He said I needed to see if the past could be forgiven, and try to move past it. Of course that was a week before he left me for some whore. Never date a bisexual guy!!! That was six months ago, and I finally decided he may have been right.

I just needed to find a way to get in touch with him. After thinking about it, I decided to call Rose and see if see could put me in touch with Cole. I knew that he may not want to talk to me, and he may have even told them not to let me contact him, but I have to try.

Well, when I called there was no answer, all I got was the answering machine, but I did leave a message telling them I was trying to contact Cole. I figured I would get no response from them once they asked Cole about it.

I was surprised when I got a call the next day.

“Hello?” I answered

“Hi Danny, this is Rose. I wanted to return your call as soon as I could.”

“That was nice of you. As I said, I am trying to locate Cole since we lost touch. I have a lot to talk to him about.” I told her hoping that she had not spoken to him.

“Well, Cole lives in Orlando now, but I am afraid I can’t give you a way to contact him at the moment," I thought here is comes. "Because he is in a coma right now. He was hit by a drunk driver, and they have been able to save his life, but we have no idea when or if he will come out of it.” She told me through obvious tears.

“Oh my God, Rose is there anyway you could tell me the hospital he is in, and maybe a hotel close by?” I asked.

“If you are coming down here, just call me back at this number 407-873-xxxx, and give the flight info, and I will have someone meet you at the airport.” She told me.

“OK, I will call back soon.” I told her hanging up the phone.

I then called to make flight arrangements, and called to let my assistant know that I would be out of town for a long stay. I explained that a good friend was in the hospital, and I did not know when I would return. I told him that if any client needed to speak to me, they could reach me by cell, and I would be taking care of e-mail myself.

I called Rose back with the flight info, and then went to pack. I had no idea how much to pack, or even what to pack, so I just packed up one large bag and my garment bag, and decided I could purchase more if needed.

I called a cab and headed out. Once I had checked in and had time to think about things, I wondered if I would ever get the chance to tell Cole how very sorry I was. I hoped that Cole would be fine, but since I knew nothing except that he was in a coma, which did not sound good, I was concerned for him.

Once on the plane, I let my mind go back and remember. It all happened when Cole was outted. I knew, even then that I was gay, but I was terrified that someone would find out. I knew that my folks would kick me out, and I would lose my friends. I turned on Cole and just ignored him, I mean I never taunted him or any of that stuff, but I just ignored him.

I don’t know if my folks would have found out about me then or not, but I do know that they would have kicked me out, since they disowned me when they found out. I know that is not an excuse for abandoning a friend, but that is what happened.

I knew that more than anything, I wanted to be friends with Cole again, but I did not know if that was possible. I at least wanted a chance to let him know how sorry I was for treating him that way. I spent the rest of the flight in thought and prayer, praying that Cole would be ok.

When the plane landed, I was more than ready to get off of it. I guess that I had been with my thoughts too long or something, and it was driving me a little nuts. I walked into the Orlando airport hoping that Rose had been able to find someone to pick me up. Then I saw a tall, really good-looking guy holding a sign with my name.


Kevin's POV

When Rose told me that an old friend of Cole’s was coming to visit, I had to think about it, cause I had been told that he did not have any friends from back in school. I decided to go and pick him up, but I was determined to make sure that he was not another one of those homophobic bastards, like his folks.

I was not sure how I intended to find out who this guy was, unless I just point blank asked him. The more I thought about it, the more I decided to just force the issue. I was not going to sit by and watch this time.

I figured that I would have more than enough time to pick him up, find out what the hell was up, and if he was cool get him settled at someone’s house, before I had to go and pick up Brian and the guys. We had pretty much decided to move into Justin’s house for the time being, since the hotel was getting a little old and with Chad around it was better to have a more homelike environment.

I made a sign with this Danny guys name on it, and headed out. Naturally the damn flight was going to be a little late, as if that were something new. I went and had a cup of coffee while I waited for him. Soon I noticed that his flight had landed and head to the departure area.

I noticed a young looking guy with brown hair, and a decent body look around, and then looked at me. He looked a bit nervous as he walked toward me, but as he got closer, I began to hope that he was not like Cole’s folks, cause he was hot! As he got nearer and nearer, I noticed he was pretty tall, maybe 6’4”, with a medium build, from what I could see. His hair was a light brown not as dark as it looked from a distance.

He finally got to where I was and said. “Hi, I guess you’re the person Rose sent to pick me up?”

“Yeah that is me. So you are Danny?”

“Yes that is me, and you are?” he asked.

“Names Kevin. I guess we need to head and get your bags.” I told him a little more gruffly than I had intended, because I was having trouble tearing my eyes off him. I knew I would be lost if I looked into those deep green eyes again, so I guess I was a little rude.

He looked at me kind of funny, but did not say anything about the rudeness; he just asked where baggage claim was. I took him there, even though it would be a few minutes before they unloaded the plane.

Finally we grabbed his bags and headed to the limo. I told the driver to head out, but gave him instructions to drive around until I told him otherwise. Once we had settled in, I started the discussion right away and was forceful about it.

“Ok, here is the deal, you will not see Cole, or anyone else until we get some things clear. We just took custody of Cole’s little brother from his parents because they were abusing him both mentally with their homophobia and they were abusing him physically. I am just telling you right now that we will not put up with any homophobic shit from you if that is what you are here for.”

Danny shook his head, “I am not here for that, trust me. I came to try and let Cole know how sorry I was for abandoning our friendship when he was outted in school. I guess I should tell you the story.” He said, but I interrupted him.

“We know all about what happened when he was outted, how he was outted, and how much it all hurt.” I said rather harshly.

“Look, I know that you do not know me, and you do have a right to judge me, but I really wanted to talk to him and let him know I was sorry, and why I did what I did. If you will listen, I will tell you to, so you know I am sincere.”

“I will listen, but I can’t forgive you for Cole. He will have to do that when he is better.” I told him, already thinking that maybe there was a real reason for this.

“Well, I knew when I was about 9 that I was gay, but I quickly found that my folks were homophobic. I listened to both my folks talk about fags, and knew that they would kick me out if they ever learned I was gay too. When Cole was outted, my folks had a fit. They knew we were friends, so I was under suspicion right away. I knew I would have to distance myself from him at least as far as him coming over. "

"I don’t know if they would have known if we still hung out at school or anywhere else, but I could not take that chance. I stayed away from Cole, and I hurt him deeply, and I wish to god that I could turn back time and change things. When I did come out to my folks years later after I had moved out, they disowned me, so I know that they would have thrown me out, but that still is not enough of an excuse for what I did.” He finished.

“Ok, let me get this straight, you are gay too?” I asked, a little more hopefully than I had intended.

“Yeah I am gay, and I guess you have to be cool with it, or we would not  be having this conversation.” He said.

I took off my hat, and sunglasses, to finally relax. He looked at me, then looked again and his eyes widened. I knew that he had just figured out who I was, but I decided to see what he would say.


Danny_'s POV_

I knew that Kevin did not like me from minute one,  just from his attitude, but when I figured out why I was amazed. Cole had made some good friends that was for certain. There was also something about him that seemed to be familiar, but I could not figure out why.

As I told him the story and explained the whole thing, he seemed to relax and let the attitude go. Next thing I know, he took off his hat and sunglasses, and suddenly it hit me. OMIGOD! I had been sitting here with Kevin Richardson….BSB Kevin Richardson….OMIGOD!!!

I had to calm down so that I would not make a fool out of myself. I sat there stunned for a moment, how did Cole know Kevin? Who is the we he was talking about? Could he mean the rest of the BSB’s? This isn’t happening! Oh wow, I am sitting here with Kevin, and he must think I am an ass. I need to say something, but I have no idea what to say.

Finally I just said, “Kevin, I just figured out who you were, and I just have to ask you how you know Cole?”

“Well, Cole was the guy who put together the whole concert for us and *NSYNC at Christmas. I don’t know if you seen or not, but he is the one who took care of everything for us. Of course, we really met him through the guys in *NSYNC, since they knew him before we did. I think they even put on a show for Rose and Will to fight the legal battle with that rag they called a newspaper.” He told me.

Again my mind turned to mush. Cole knew not only BSB’s but also *NSYNC, and he was friends with all of them? Oh wow. God I thought to myself, you keep repeating yourself. I chastised myself for thinking oh wow over and over again. This was just too much, and I needed to relax for a bit.

“Kevin what hotel will I be in?” I asked.

“You will be staying with the rest of us, and we are all going to be staying at Justin and Chris’s house. They have tons of room and we need to all be together, plus we want to make sure that Chad has a more homelike environment. He has been through enough.” He told me.

Staying at Justin and Chris’s? Ok, I thought Justin and JC lived together. I wonder who Chad is. Guess I will have to ask.

“I thought that Justin and JC lived together, and if you don’t mind who is Chad?” I asked in confusion.

“Well, I guess I may as well go ahead and fill you in on everything. Justin and Chris, Brian and Nick, Josh and Joey, Alex and Howie are all couples. Lance and I are both single gay guys. Chad is Cole’s brother, though he was adopted by Cole’s parents when his died. Cole and Lance both have custody of Chad for now. Lance had to get joint custody because Cole was in a coma, but he said he would give up custody when Cole wakes if that is what Cole wants. Oh, and just a tip. Do not call Josh, JC, he hates that.” He finished.

I sat there stunned beyond measure for about 20 minutes as we drove around. Finally my mind started to function again, as it had finally sunk in that they were all gay. Kevin was gay and single, oh my. I realized it is silly, but I looked into Kevin’s eyes and saw something there, something that connected deep inside me. I could see his pain and loneliness, a deep and loving heart, and so much more. I think I fell for him in that moment. Of course, he would never want someone like me, but still I felt something.

“Hey Danny, are you hungry?” he asked me.

“Yeah, I am actually. I have not eaten today.”

“Well, lets get something to eat, then we have to head back to the airport. We have been driving around for so long that Brian and the guys should be back soon, and you will be able to meet Chad, since he is with them.” He told me.

“Sounds good to me. I can eat anything, so if you want just fast food that is cool with me.” I said.

“Great,” he said as he picked up the intercom phone. He spoke with the driver quietly, and soon we were pulling into a Mickey D’s.

“Would you mind running in and getting the stuff?” He asked me with a slight smile.

“Sure, I can run in that is not a problem. What did you want?” I asked and he told me.

We ate and chatted about Cole’s condition, and many other things as we ate and on the way back to the airport. I told him that I owned my own small Public Relations firm. Boy he is not a big fan of people in my line of work. I can understand though after he told me some of the crazy shit their management, record companies, and PR people had done to them.

In no time we were at the airport awaiting Brian and the guys.


Lance's POV

I told Cole this morning that Chad would be back later today, and told him that I would bring him by to visit later after he had some time to rest. I am not 100% sure, but I think that Cole tightened his hand a tiny bit. I know that it sure felt like he gripped my hand a little. I hope so, but I will not tell anyone or they will think I am crazy.

After I had told him all the latest news, I sang one of the songs I had been able to learn by his favorite artist. I sang Rhiannon to him quietly, and then when I was done, I sang Landslide. I somehow remember him telling us that he loved Stevie Nicks, so I bought some of the music and lyrics so I could learn them for him.

After that, I pulled out the book I had been reading to him, and turned to the chapter and started to read. I had never really read much in the way of science fiction or fantasy, but I was really enjoying this book. I could almost see the dragons in flight above Pern. I could not quite come up with why a male dragon was named Ruth, but then he apparently was a very unique dragon to begin with.

I got so taken with the story that I read 8 chapters of the book, and was almost running late to get back to the house and get dinner ready for the rest of the guys. I told Cole I would be back later and would bring Chad with me. As I walked out the door, Rose was waiting to take my place, so I chatted briefly with her and headed out.

As odd as it sounds I missed the heck out of Chad, and that kind of scared me, since I knew that Cole probably would not want to share custody when he got better. I just can’t understand how anyone could not love that young man, he just wormed his way into all of our hearts almost from day one.

By the time I got home and took a shower, I realized there was no way to fix and big meal, so I just ordered several pizzas and some Chinese. The rest of the guys started to come in or down to wait for dinner and Chad’s return. I was hoping that he would be ok since he had to leave Tommy, but the way Josh was talking, I do not think that he will have to wait too long for Tommy to be moving down here.


Narrator's POV

At the airport Kevin noticed that another young man had joined the guys, and Chad seemed to have a huge smile on his face, as did Brian and Nick. In fact, Nick almost had glow about him.

No one introduced the new young man, and it seemed that no one wanted questions asked right now, so Kevin just dropped it.

As Kevin and the rest of the guys headed to Justin and Chris’s house, the remaining guys had all gathered to welcome home Chad.

When Chad and the rest arrived, everyone could tell that something was different about Brian and Nick, plus they could all see the two new arrivals as well. Josh and Joey at least knew who Tommy was, but since Rose had not told the others about Danny, no one had a clue who he was.

Kevin spoke up first. “This is Danny who was a friend of Cole’s back in school. I know what some of you may think, but I would not have brought him here if I thought that he would give Cole or any of us a problem about being gay. Danny is gay too, and he came here to let Cole know why he felt like he had to abandon their friendship in the past. I think that he is ok, and he had some valid concerns then too.”

“Hey, if you convinced Kevin, then I am all for giving you a chance too.” Josh told him, which seemed to calm him a bit as he let out a huge sigh of relief.

They all caught the subtle difference in Kevin too, and they all saw the looks that went back and forth between the two, though they were not sure if the two actually noticed them in the other.

Next Brian spoke up before Nick could jump out of his skin. Poor Nick was so excited and so badly wanted to share their news that he was almost bouncing. “Guys, I have a couple of things you need to know. First, I would like to introduce you all to Tommy Littrell. Nick and I were able to adopt him, because the guy at the home had connections with one of the judges, and it was a private adoption. The other thing we have to tell you, I am going to let Nick tell you about.”

“Well guys, I am going to soon be Nick Littrell. Brian asked me to marry him before we checked into getting Tommy, and I said yes. We have not set a date yet, but it will be soon.” Nick proudly announced.

After a lot of hugs and welcome to the families, they all settled down a bit. They discussed the advisability of private school or tutors, and after a long discussion decided that tutors would be better for the time being.

Nick and Brian were quietly talking to each other about something, and when they finished Nick asked Justin and Alex to be his best men, and Brian asked Kevin and Josh to be his best men. They asked Lance, Howie, Chris, and Joey to sing. Then they asked Tommy and Chad to be the ring bearers. Naturally everyone agreed.

Chad, Tommy, and Danny were all still a bit stunned by all of these guys being gay, and planning a wedding on top of it all. Soon though they all got into the excitement of the situation.

Chad moved over to sit with Tommy, and soon they were holding each other tightly, locked into a loving, but still hot kiss. Lance soon brought them back to reality though, when he cleared his throat. Both looked at him and blushed, and Lance just laughed.

After everyone had quieted down and relaxed a bit, Kevin spoke up. “Guys, I have an old friend in Dallas who may be able to give us some advise or help when the contracts end. I would like to get everyone’s ok to call and speak to him. He will not leak anything before everything is taken care of, David is just not that kind of guy.”

Everyone agreed with Kevin about calling his friend David. Kevin had figured that there would be no trouble, but he wanted to make sure that everyone agreed. It looked as though everyone realized that they may need more help than they had hoped, but they were all determined to get out from under all the contracts.

They worked out a schedule so that someone was with Cole 24/7. Tommy and Chad wanted to be included in this so the guys decided to let them. Kevin, Danny, Alex, Howie, Joey, and Josh took the mornings. Chris, Justin, Brian, and Nick took the afternoon and evenings. Lance, Chad, Tommy took the night shift. Though, Lance and Chad were there much more often than just the night shift though.

On January 2, Danny, Chad and Tommy took over sitting duties as all the other guys were holding a huge press conference. They sat in Cole’s room and turned the TV on so that they could see the news too. All three of them sort of knew what was happening, but wanted to see it.


********MTV NEWS SPECIAL REPORT********

“Hi, this is Kurt Loder here in Orlando where the guys of *NSYNC and BSB have called a press conference. There are media here from around the world, and no one seems to know what this is about. I guess we are about to find out since the guys are all coming in now.” He said as all 10 guys walked in and took seats, breaking up so that they were all seated next to someone in the other band.

After a few minutes to allow calm and quiet to settle in, Kevin started the conference.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, we have called you all here today to make some major announcements. We apologize that this conference was called so early, however we wanted to make the announcement as soon as we could. Each one of us will read a statement, then we will open the floor to questions.’

‘This morning, approximately ten minutes ago, paperwork was filed ending our contracts with our management, public relations company, record company, assorted attorneys and others. The paperwork was filed with the clerk of courts as well as being hand delivered to the above-mentioned companies and people. Therefore as of January 4, we will not renew contracts with any of them, and we will be free of them.” Kevin finished as the press continued to gasp and struggle not to ask questions.

Justin started next. “I am sure you are wondering what led to such a drastic move. Each of us will give a reason or some of them for why we all decided to make this move.’

‘In my case there are a couple of reasons. First, I got tired of the image of a self-centered brat that they were forcing me to portray. When we started I was young and shy, that carried over into being a bit stiff with you guys. They decided to use that to make me appear aloof and self-centered. I hate that, I am nothing like that, and I think that over the next couple of years you will find out what the REAL people under our images are like.’

‘Of course, there is another reason why I wanted to get away from them. Before I go into that, I need to let the guys know what is coming, as none of us have discussed what we were going to say.” Justin quickly leaned over and spoke with the two next to him, and they in turn those next to them. Soon everyone knew and they all nodded their heads that it was fine.

“Ok, the second and maybe most important reason to me is... that management and the rest were interfering with my relationship. I am and have been in a relationship for a few years and have been and continue to be very happy, however when management and the rest found out, they tried to convince you guys that Brit and I were a couple. Brit, if you are listening, I am sorry that they used you like that. I am sorry that being your friend caused you to have to deal with all this, and I thank you for keeping the secret.’ He paused to get control of his emotions, then continued.

‘Others here have been forced to date people for public image, heck they even tried to force Brian into marriage. This will end today, I will no longer hide. I am madly, head over heels in love and the guy I am in love with is the most amazing person in the world!” He finished and Brian quickly took over.

While Justin had been talking notes were going back and forth between the guys and all agreed that anyone who wanted to come out could and all the others would support them, Nick and Brian could announce their coming marriage if they wanted, and the adoption.

“As Justin said, I was almost forced to marry Leighanne, though I did not love her, and would have been miserable. They wanted me to be miserable, they wanted me to lie to her, they wanted us to lie to all of you. Why? It is simple, they did not think that our fans would be able to handle the real me. Well, I tend to think that our fans are not bigoted, are open to and want us to be real. A few days ago, on a trip to help a very special friend, some of us met a young man who had lost his folks, and was not being adopted because of his age. After thinking about the matter and talking about it at length with my partner, I asked him to marry me, and he said yes!!! We then proceeded to adopt that young man and we feel privileged to call him our son. None of this would have been possible if we had continued on with the contracts.” Brian finished.

“I too am tired of the whole image thing, from now on you will never hear me referred to as JC again, it will be Josh. JC is a made up non-person. Josh is real. I personally was tired of the direction that our music was forced to take. From now on, our music will be ours; wrote, played, sung, produced, mixed by us, and us alone.” Josh finished.

“You all know that I had a problem with drinking, that I got help and have been sober for a while now. What you do not know is that if it had been left to management and the record companies, I would never have gotten that help. They were against it and I will never forgive them for that. I am so glad that my friends stood by me and made sure that I was able to get that help! I feel the same as Josh, JC and AJ are not real, they were created, I am Alex. I have always been Alex, but forgot that for a bit, but my friends helped me and I will never forget that!” Alex finished emotionally.

“I too was the party animal, or so the image said. I went out to clubs looking for something, not even sure what it was. I lost myself and it took a lot of effort on the guys part to get me back. I guess most of the credit would go to Lance, because even when things were tense between him and I, he never gave up on me. I could not continue to let PR, management and record companies put me into a role that I felt was not me. I hated the bad example it was setting for fans, and others and I decided that it had to end.” Joey said succinctly.

“I guess the main reason I wanted this is that I got tired of being unable to be friends with my *Nsync in public. We got reamed for the joint concert at Christmas, and we have been given hell for being seen together at the hospital where a very dear friend lies in a coma. I decided that the music industry needs to have the ugly underside exposed. Mark my words, NSYNC and BSB will be back, we will be bigger than ever and we will do it as real, honest people.” Howie said with force!

“Justin, I love you too, and I need to ask you something.’ Chris got up and went to Justin. Kneeling down, he looked at Justin, tears streaming down both of their faces. “Baby I love you, everyday I find I love you more and more.’ Pulling out a little velvet box, he opened it. “Justin will you marry me and make my heart sing?”

Justin dropped down with Chris, “Yes, oh God, yes I would love to marry you.” Chris took the stunning gold and silver twisted ring out and slipped it onto Justin finger. They then collapsed into each other and kissed deeply and passionately. The guys let the kiss continue for a bit, then pulled them to their feet to congratulate them with a massive group hug.

The whole time the press had sat there mouths hanging open, stunned not only by all they had learned, but also by the almost palatable force of the love on that stage. There was no doubt left to anyone in that room, that Chris and Justin loved each other thoroughly, completely, and totally.

Once everyone was once again seated, Lance took his turn.

“I guess I have many reasons for this decision. I have never really had to deal too much with a fake persona as some of the others did. Don’t get me wrong, I would rather be just James and not Lance. I guess the reason Lance doesn’t bother me too much is that I have always been called both.’

‘I guess the main reason for me, happened a while back. We met a really nice guy who had won tickets and backstage passes to one of our concerts. Some of you may remember him, as he kind of blasted you guys in the media, and some of our fans, among other things.’

‘Well after the concert we found out why he felt that way. His story touched me deeply. I will try to recount it for you, so you will hopefully see why it did.’

"Back in high school, Cole worked on the school newspaper, in the features and editorial sections so he could write in-depth articles. His senior year while on Christmas break Cole happened to catch a program on TV about gays, and as Cole watched it he was saddened by how society treated not only gays, but just the whole topic of sex. Cole wrote a long article about it. He included many comments about what it was like to be gay and in the closet in high school. Telling about the abuse and the many other things that gays experienced and that he had seen in the halls at school.

Well the local newspaper picked up on the story and decided to assign a homophobic person to the story. She decided to use the story as a way to condemn gays because she felt his article had made people actually think about hate and that was bad for her. Somehow, she discovered a rumor about one of the guys at the school. His name was Alan and he was a really shy and quiet guy. When she published her article, it contained not only the rumor stated as though it were fact, but had made up a lot of other stuff about him as well. She made him out to be a pervert and into some really kinky stuff. Alan was tormented at school, at church, and at home. The bitch had outted him long before he was ready. Three weeks after the story, he shot himself.

Cole was devastated that his article had led to the death of someone. He was furious about the lies, about the way he had been treated and a lot of other confusing things. The thing that helped me through that, was that Alan had left a letter for his parents and one for me. His parents read theirs and then talked to me in detail. I was able to tell them that the only thing in that article the bitch put out that was true was that he was gay. His parents really did not care that he was gay, they had been upset about all the other stuff that had been said. Of course they did not ask Alan if it was true, but to be somewhat fair to them, they did not know if he would tell them the truth since he had not told them about being gay, even after the article. After long talks with Cole and a couple of others, they decided to sue the paper and the hack who had written the story. That lawsuit is still going on and it is pretty nasty.

Cole sat down and wrote one last article and in it, he came out and then blasted the students, the faculty and the administration for allowing the abuse they had allowed to happen to Alan. After handing in the article and making sure it was published, he quit the paper and decided that he wanted nothing to do with journalism.

His coming out was bad, he lost almost all of his so-called friends, and his family were not pleased either. Cole caught hell at church and at school. The last straw at church was the pastor starting to go into the evils of being gay and saying that HIV was just punishment sent from God. Cole started laughing, and walked out. He have not been back since.

Once Cole finally got out of school, his parents basically told me to have a good life and not to let the door hit me on the ass on the way out. He rented a truck, got all my stuff and left. Cole stayed with Alan's folks for quite a while. They helped him pay for school a little, but the truth is they are almost broke from the legal bills. Many of the folks in town hate them. Cole thought that most support them, but most that do don't say it.

They tried to have a few fund-raisers, but the paper will not let us advertise the events so we have made very little from them. They can't afford to put ads in the Courier-Journal in Louisville, so they were just stuck. They even tried to get TV news to cover things, but they won't either.

That I guess that is really the basic reason why Cole hated the media. He has watched how the media treats people, even people like us, and hated it. He saw the way our fans treat us and others like us, and hated that too. He guessed the rest about management and our record companies because it just seemed to me to be accurate. Cole guessed they were like that, given the way everything else seems to work." He finished.

“I think that is pretty much all that he said, though there may have been more. The thing is that after he told us that, we were all so stunned that none of us spoke right away, and he just assumed that we were like so many others. He ran out thinking we were all homophobic assholes. We spent a lot of time looking for him and trying to find a way to help and show him that we were not like that. It took a while, but we were able to find out how to get in touch with the family that lost their son.’

‘We were unable to find Cole, but we did put on a concert, and all that money went to the family. They were able to settle the lawsuit. Our management and record companies had a cow about that. They thought we would be labeled as gay for helping, not caring at all about that family.’

‘We did not run into Cole again until the concert at Disney. He was the guy who put it together, ran everything as a matter of fact and did a fantastic job. He was able to get the BSB in for us and made the show so much better as I think we would all agree. That night, Cole left to head home and was hit by a drunk driver, and he is now in a coma. We got a very good demonstration of the hate that Cole had to deal with while growing up when his parents were called to come to the hospital.’

‘They had brought Cole’s little brother with them, and they treated him horribly, calling him faggot, and other horrid names. They also had been beating him, and that led to me gaining custody of him, though I insisted that it be joint custody for now. I know that I could not have done this if we had not ended these contracts.” He finished very forcefully.

At last Nick was up. “I guess I too am sick of the fake personas, but for me it is personal. I would never have been about to be married to the man of my dreams, or adopted a wonderful son if we had continued as it was. Brian, I love you with all my heart,and T-Boy if you are watching, I love ya buddy!” Nick finished.

Kevin opened the floor for questions.

“Kurt Loder MTV News. Ok, you guys have just turned the music world on it’s ear. Let me see if I have this right. Brian and Nick are getting married, as are Chris and Justin. Lance has custody of a kid and Brian and Nick have adopted a son. Is that correct?”

“Yes it is” Brian answered.

“Do you think that you will lose fans because of these announcements?” Kurt asked.

“I honestly do not think that we will lose many fans, though we may lose some. I also think it is possible that we may pick up some as well. I think most of our fans are open-minded and will not care about any of this. I guess if we lose some, they will most likely be the bigoted ones, and we could care less about them.” Joey answered.

Kevin took another question. “Stan Hortner CNN, What are your plans for new albums, do you plan to find a new record company and management or what?”

“We are taking some time off, maybe up to a year, to just kick back and enjoy life a bit. We plan to manage ourselves and as to other plans, we have not made any firm decisions as yet.” James told them.

“Really, the only things that we have set for certain are that we will manage ourselves, and we will record and tour together. We may have some side projects where some of us will record and write together, but that is all up in the air right now.” Justin told them.

Over the next hour they answered tons of questions. Many of the reporters seemed to have taken the story of Cole’s dealings with the press to heart, and did not push into really personal areas. It was a bit refreshing for all of the guys to have real questions, and to have the most personal questions left out.

Chad and Tommy had noticed that Danny had really come apart at the seems while James had been telling the story of what happened in high school. Chad had been very upset by the story, but Danny had lived it too. He had to deal with all the horrible things he had done at that time. Finally Chad and Tommy just held him and let him cry, telling him to let it all out.

They turned the TV off and just let Danny go. Suddenly they all heard quite clearly, “Danny please don’t cry, it is ok.” All three jumped and ran to the bed, to see Cole looking at them. “It is ok Danny, it is in the past.” Cole said again, then closed his eyes and seemed to drop back into the coma.


Copyright 2004 by WildHeart

Next: Chapter 15


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