End of Innocence

By Mirage and Rowan Taranthia

Published on Aug 17, 2000

Gay

Disclaimer: We don't know Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez, Lance Bass, Joey Fatone, Chris Kirkpatrick, Ryan Philleppe, Reese Witherspoon, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, or Brian Littrell. But we DO know Angel, Josh, James, Sweetie, Pookie, Juju, Rez, Britty, Chrissy, and Bri Bri quite well. Cesar Keegan is just a cute little character that we made up. Ain't he great? Anyways, we have nothing against these people (Except Britney, but that's a whole other issue and we're just not going to get into that. smacks Rowan Keep you're damn mouth shut)

To our beautiful fans who don't e-mail us : We still love you. If you're reading this chapter that means, you've made it throught 1, 2, & 3. That's gotta show for sumpen, right? RIGHT! hehe. Glad we agree. But if you haven't e-mailed us. Please do :) yougottaloveus@loveable.com (it speaks the truth! i swear on my father's life. rowan snorts he'll be dead in the next 5 min. mirage smacks rowan i thought i told you to shut up?)

To our ONE fan who e-mailed us : Thank you :) We Love You :)

(you too can be on the 'fan list'. it's not hard. just e-mail us and tell us how much you like the story. see. it's not hard.)

Okay. Um. Gee. I think that's it. MIRAGE SUCKS COCK! Um..Rowan, so do you. Oh, right. DAMNIT! Rowan Taranthia everyone. Rowan sticks tongue out at Mirage Don't even get me started on that thing.

End Of Innocence Written By: Mirage (The Cow) and Rowan (The Whore)

Chapter 4

JC woke up to hear banging in the kitchen. He squinted and wrapped the blanket around his shoulders and stumbled into the room. Ryan was starting a pot of coffee, it looked like he had been crying.

"Ry, man. What's wrong?" he asked. Ryan stopped moving and leaned on his hands against the counter top.

"I just had a fight with Justin," he sniffled.

"Why? You two are almost as inseparable as Joey and Lance."

"He hasn't told his family about us. He was on the phone with Lynn and I took the phone and started talking to her a-and I mentioned that we were in love and Justin just sorta, look like he died.

"I thought we meant something to each other! He lied to me, JC! He fucking lied."

"Ry, you gotta understand Justin."

"I thought I did."

"No, I mean. He and his mom are really close. It's already gonna kill her enough knowing that Justin isn't going to be there for Thanksgiving and Christmas. He's always there. Family is very important to Justin."

"I want to be a part of that family, though."

"I know you do, Ryan but you gotta let Justin do this on his own. He has to do it at the right time." Ryan sighed.

"I love him so much, JC. This hurt me more than anything. It felt like he had just ripped out my heart and shoved it into the blender," he motioned toward the machinery.

"I didn't mean to," Justin whispered from behind them. "I want you and mom to know each other. I know she'd love you, just as much as I do. If I lost you, I would be lost, Ryan. Life didn't make sense until you came into my life. I thought I didn't have a purpose. But every time you hold me everything just feels right." The two stared at each other. Tears running down their cheeks. In the blink of an eye they were embracing each other, both softly weeping.

JC smiled at them. At least they were making up. He jumped onto the counter and poured a cup of coffee. A tear slid down his cheek. 'I miss my Pookie,' he thought. The couple didn't notice.

Cesar walked in, grabbed the pot of coffee and poured himself a cup. He then jumped up on the counter, pulled a chair to him with his feet, and rested them on the seat. He leaned forward and took a small sip of that heavenly coffee.

"Ahh." He sighed.

"You're up early." JC remarked, smiling at Cesar. Cesar just chuckled to himself and grinned.

"Brian's coming at ten, it's what? 8?" Cesar asked, raising a brow. The guys just shook their head.

"It's eight thirty." Justin said softly from behind Ryan. "And we're going to go upstairs to get ready. We have things to discuss and do today." Justin grabbed Ryan's hand and pulled him upstairs.

Cesar chuckled to himself but stopped when he saw Reese coming down the stairs with a strained look on her face. He ran up and helped her down the stairs. She gave him a smile as thanks and sat down. Cesar heard a gasp from the living room and made his way toward the living room. He froze when he entered.

Christina was there, in front of the file place with a sketchbook in her hands and the picture was that of Cesar's mother.

"Who was this?" She asked softly, not turning to see who was there. She knew it was Cesar.

Cesar looked down at the ground and sighed. "My mother." He whispered.

She nodded and then looked back at Cesar. "You have her eyes."

"Thank you." He said softly. Christina didn't know what that meant to him.

"Was she always this beautiful?" Christina asked as she studied the sketch. Cesar nodded and sat on a couch.

"Yeah," He said softly. "She was."

Christina walked over to him and gave him a big hug. She dropped the sketchbook in his lap before leaving for the kitchen. He stood up and followed her with the sketchbook in hand.

Once in the kitchen, Cesar took his spot on the counter under Reese's disapproving glare. He smiled at her and sat up there anyway.

--

Chris walked into the kitchen.

"Hey Chris," Cesar greeted.

"Hey Cesar," he looked pasted JC and took a mug from the cupboard.

"Dammit Chris! Talk to me!" JC pleaded. Chris slammed the mug onto the counter.

"And say what to you, Joshua? Say that I forgive you? Say that it doesn't matter to me? That's not gonna happen," Chris growled, pouring the coffee into the cup.

"It was a DREAM! I can't control what happens in my dreams."

"Yeah, but as I recall, You said it was just a fling and you were awake. What flight, Joshua!?"

"Okay, fine! Howie and I had one night of hot sex in Maui. We had a fight, he comforted me, and we had sex. Okay? It was 2 years ago!"

"Then why are you still dreaming about it?"

"Maybe I want to be with Howie instead of you!" JC screamed, immediately regretting it. Chris dropped the coffee cup as it smashed into a thousand little pieces. "Chris I'm sorry, I didn't me-"

"Shove it, JC. Don't talk to me. Never talk to me ever again," he said flatly before walking out of the kitchen and back up the stairs. The door only made a small clicking sound as he closed it.

--

"So what are we going to do about this?" Justin asked as he and Ryan sat down on the bed.

"I would really like to know your parents, Juju." Justin smiled, they were using pet names again.

"I want them to know you too." He stared down at his hands. "Why don't we fly down to Florida. We can do it in person." Ryan was taken aback.

"Are you sure?" Justin nodded and looked up at him.

"Yeah," he smiled. "I'm sure. I love you, Ryan. I want this." Ryan took Justin's hand in his and kissed it.

"I love you too, Justin. More than anything and I'll do whatever you want." Justin smiled as they kissed. "So when do you wanna leave?"

"How about Sunday. That way you and Mom can have some time to get to know each other before Thanksgiving."

"All right. I'll call in tickets," Ryan smiled picking up Justin's discarded phone as it rung. Ryan looked at Justin. He nodded. Ryan opened it and hit 'Yes'. "Hello?"

"Justin?"

"Uh...No, this is Ryan."

"This is Lynn."

"Oh, Hi Lynn about earlier I'm really sor-"

"I'd like to talk to Justin please."

"Yes ma'am." He handed Justin the phone.

"Hi Mom. I'm catching a plane on Sunday to come see you guys for Thanksgiving."

"All right. So you need Paul to pick you up?"

"No, W-I'll just rent a car."

"All right, See you Sunday then."

"Okay, Bye Mom."

"Bye Honey." Justin closed the phone and handed the phone to Ryan. "Two first class tickets to Florida." Ryan nodded and dialed.

--

Cesar was busy sketching a few faces that popped into his head every now and then. It was nine-thirty and he had been ready since nine, to say he was excited was an understatement. And the fact that Brian's face was always popping into his head, was not helping.

'Might as well sketch it.' He said to himself as he turned the page and started sketching the outline to Brian's face. A face he knew he'd never forget. 'Wish I had color pencils,' He thought to himself as he used his flat lead pencil. 'At least then I could make these all the more vivid.'

By the time nine-fifty rolled around, he had six pictures of Brian in his sketchbook. All were different perspectives of Brian's face and body. Cesar closed the book and stood up to stretch just as the doorbell rang. 'He's here!' he thought excitedly. 'He's here!'

Since the doorbell was so loud that you could hear it throughout the whole house, everyone dropped what they were doing and ran in the living room to meet this Brian character. Justin, Reese, Christina and Britney had already met him.

Cesar and Reese reached the door at the same time and she couldn't help but smile broadly as her cousin blushed. 'He's happy!' She thought excitedly. 'He's happy!'

Cesar opened the door and peaked through a crack. "Who's there?" He asked, glancing at the man in jeans and a thick windbreaker.

"Brian." Said the figure with a small smile on his face.

"Right answer." Cesar said as he opened the door all the way. "And now," Cesar said grabbing his wallet off of the little stand by the coat rack, "We go." Cesar quickly ran out and shut the door, as fast as he could before the rest of the house saw Brian.

"Where to first, boss?" Brian said as he unlocked the passenger door to his car.

"First things first," Cesar said with a half of a smile on his face. "I get control of the radio, the heat, the windows, and where we go." Brian smiled at Cesar and nodded.

"Deal." They said as they shook hands.

--

Chris sat in the chair in front of the fireplace. His arms were crossed over his chest, lips pursed in a thin line. He stared blankly into the fire. JC was lying on the couch, arms crossed, hat covering his face, and legs crossed at the ankles. He didn't want anyone to see the tears streaming down his face.

"All right what are we going to do about Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle-Dumber over there?" Joey asked, as the rest of the house, minus Cesar, were crowded around the dining room table.

"We need to get them out of the house. We should go out and do something fun. We don't need to be back until 6," Reese suggested.

"But where?"

"We could go to the Zoo." Everyone looked at Lance and raised an eyebrow. "It was just a suggestion!" he blushed. Joey put his arm around him and kissed him on the top of the head.

"And it was a cute suggestion."

"What about the movies?"

"And the mall! Y'all know how much they both love the mall. It's bound to get 'em to at least talk to each other," Britney grinned.

"Yeah," they all agreed.

--

"All right my little angry beavers, get your asses off the furniture and get into the car," Lance hollered to JC and Chris. They both looked up at him and glared. "Don't gimme that look. I told you to get moving and I mean it." They muttered to themselves as they passed Lance and out into the hallway. Britney tossed them their coats.

"Put 'em on boys." Ryan and Justin came down stairs helping Reese, all three were already bundled up. Joey opened the door.

"Let's go! Cars warm and waiting!" They pushed JC and Chris out the door and Christina closed it behind them.

--

"Here." Cesar said shoving Brian five books into his hands. Brian looked at the titles and frowned a minute.

"Stone of Tears, Blood of the Fold, Temple of the Winds, Soul of the Fire, and Faith of the Fallen?" Brian asked, raising an eyebrow.

Cesar nodded and showed Brian another copy of Faith of the Fallen.

"Terry Goodkind's books. Oh!" Cesar said, suddenly remembering something else. He grabbed Brian by the shirt and yanked him toward the other end of the Sci-Fi/Fantasy section of Barnes and Noble. He scanned the titles briefly before grabbing another book and handing it to Brian.

"Legends?" Brian asked, perplexed.

"It's an anthology of three authors. A story each. Terry Goodkind writes about how the Boundaries were raised." Brian beamed and nodded.

"I was always curious about that." Brian said with the six books in hand, he followed Cesar to the checkout line.

"Wait a minute." Cesar said hanging Brian his book. In a flash, Cesar was up the stairs to the second level of Barnes and Noble and was in the Gay/Lesbian section. He searched a moment before grabbing a book titled, 'Fairy Tales' and then ran back down to Brian. "Perfect." Cesar said as he grabbed his book off of Brian's stack.

"Heavy duty reading there." The cashier said flashing Brian a smile. Cesar tried not to laugh.

"Yeah, it'll give me something to do at night when I'm not on the phone." He said glancing at Cesar. Cesar blushed beet red before taking his books to another teller and checking out.

They both reached the doors to Barnes and Noble at about the same time, flashing each other a quick smile, they raced to the car. The two of them threw the books in the backseat and grinned at each other. As soon as they were both in the car, they immediately grasped hands and drove toward the grocery store.

--

JC and Chris sat in the back of the van. Both had looks that could kill the onlooker in a second. Reese and Christina was sitting next to them, to keep them from moving away from each other. Britney, Joey, and Lance were sitting in front, Ryan was driving, and Justin was directing him around the area.

"Stop poking me," JC growled.

"I didn't touch you," Chris replied.

"Liar."

"Fucker."

"Buttmunch."

"Slut."

"Jerkwad."

"Whore."

"Wanna-be Stripper."

"Crack whore. Literally," Chris snorted.

"Trash."

"Lush."

"Dickwad."

"Bitch."

"Assmunch."

"Fuck nut."

"Pussy fucker."

"Hey!" the three girls both shouted.

"Sorry," they mumbled.

"All right guys, we're here," Ryan called pointing to the mall they had pulled in front of. They all piled out into the parking lot.

"All right, we're splitting up into two groups so we're not spotted," Reese explained.

"Chris, JC, Lance and Joey. Ryan, Justin, and us girls," Britney said as they split off.

"Meet us in front of Sears in two hours," Lance called.

--

Cesar put his foot on the back of the shopping cart and sped down the aisle stopping inches before hitting Brian.

"Kids," Brian muttered as he dropped the three packages of mozzarella cheese into the shopping cart. "Okay," Brian said glancing at what was inside the cart. "Is that everything?" Cesar glanced at the ingredients and thought to himself.

"Nope." He said as he pushed the cart toward the magazine aisle. "I need colored pencils."

"Colored pencils?" Brian asked raising an eyebrow.

"I sketch pictures," Cesar said as he made a left into the magazine aisle. "And I write poetry." He added, then, as soon as he spotted something, he let out a little squeal and grabbed a magazine off the shelf. "Oh My Gods! He is like, SO cute!" Cesar said mimicking a teenybopper

"Who?" Brian asked calmly, not really wanting to know.

"Him!" Cesar pointed to a blond on the page. A blond who Brian knew quite well.

"Ew! Please tell me you have SOME taste." Brian gagged. "I mean, Nick? That's just...wrong."

Cesar laughed and put an arm around Brian's neck as he kissed his cheek. The kiss left them both stunned into silence as they walked to the checkout counter, paid for the supplies and left to go home.

--

"I wanna go home," JC whined as they entered Spencer's.

"This is your favorite thing to do, JC. Relax and have fun," Joey instructed putting a pink, leopard print hat on top of JC's head. JC looked into the mirror.

"Ahh! I look like AJ!" he screeched and flung it off his head. Chris snorted and walked into the back of the store, Lance following behind him.

He found Chris staring at a Backstreet Boy's poster. He followed Chris' gaze and found it burning a hole through Howie's head.

"No matter how much you stare at him you can't change the past," Lance whispered.

"I know that. That doesn't mean I can't wish that it never happened," Chris spun around. "He hurt me Lance. Really bad. I mean, it wasn't that he called out his name or had a fling with him. He...He said he wanted to be with Howie instead of me," Chris whispered. Lance watched as tears slid down Chris' face. Lance wrapped his arms around him.

"It was said in a moment of anger. You know how JC gets when he's angry. He says a lot of things that he doesn't mean."

"Even so. He may not have meant it, but deep down, he wants it. He doesn't want me. He wants Howie."

"No, I don't," they turned around and saw JC standing with Joey. He turned away and walked out of the store. Chris sighed and followed Lance out. JC was leaning against the wall, his hat covering his face as his shoulders shook. Chris walked away towards Sears.

"What are we gonna do, Sweetie?" Lance asked.

"I don't know," Joey sighed, defeated.

--

"It's hopeless," Lance whispered to Britney as the opening credits rolled across the screen.

"Doesn't mean we can't try," she hissed.

"They won't even look at each other!"

"So? We have to help them. They're our friends." Lance nodded and leaned back against his chair.

JC sat in the theater, blankly staring at the screen. He felt the anger emanating from Chris' body. It made him want to crawl into a hole and die. He knew that everything that had happened that day was a mistake.

'How could I have actually said that,' he thought. 'Chris means so much to me. But why do we keep fighting? We always fight and end up not speaking. Maybe we're not supposed to be together.' He felt a tear slid down his cheek. He couldn't imagine life without Chris by his side.

--

Exhausted, they all barged into the house. JC dragged Lance up the stairs.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Can you help me move my stuff to the guest room?" Lance couldn't believe his ears. He was actually moving his things out of the room he and Chris had occupied for the past two years. He sighed and nodded. JC went to his closet and pulled out his suitcase, dropping all his clothing into it.

"I can't believe this is happening," Lance whispered under his breath. It seemed unreal. He found a box and started placing JC's belongings into it. So unreal.

Reese, Britney, and Christina went into the living room and collapsed onto the couch. Britney put Reese's feet in her lap and massaged them.

"Thank you, baby."

"No problem, kitten. It's the least I can do. Besides, it's worth it when you think about what the reason is." Reese stroked a hand over her stomach. She gasped and grabbed Christina's hand and placed it on her stomach.

"Can you feel it?" Christina could indeed feel the little life in Reese's stomach kicking inside. She smiled.

"Yeah."

"Will one of you sing. Please?" Britney nodded.

"I will," she cleared her throat.

When you feel alone And the world has turned its back on you Give me a moment please to tame your wild wild heart I know that you feel like the walls are closing in on you It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold When darkness is upon your door and you feel like you can't take it anymore

Let me be the one you call If you jump I'll break your fall Lift you up and fly away with you into the night If you need to fall apart I can mend a broken heart If you need to crash then crash and burn You're not alone

When you feel all alone And a loyal friend is hard to find You're caught in a one way street With the monsters in your head When hopes and dreams are far away and You feel you can't face the day

Let me be the one you call If you jump I'll break your fall Lift you up and fly away with you into the night If you need to fall apart I can mend a broken heart If you need to crash then crash and burn You're not alone

Because there has always been heartache and pain And when it's over you'll breathe again You'll breathe again

When you feel all alone And the world has turned its back on you Give me a moment please To tame your wild wild heart

Let me be the one you call If you jump I'll break your fall Lift you up and fly away with you into the night If you need to fall apart I can mend a broken heart If you need to crash then crash and burn You're not alone

A small tear slipped down Christina's cheek but she brushed it away before either of the other girls could see it.

"That was beautiful, baby," she smiled. "I'm gonna go catch a nap before dinner." She excused herself and hurried up the stairs, almost knocking JC over as he moved his belongings.


Cesar watched from the passenger seat as they pulled into the driveway. He grabbed the bags and food for dinner that night as he stepped out of the car with Brian in tow. They kissed once, lightly as Cesar jiggled with the lock on the front door. Suddenly both of their eyes locked and they started kissing again, only more passionately.

Cesar had managed to get the door unlocked and them inside as they embraced and kissed. They both dropped whatever bags they had and kissed their way to the living room. They didn't see Reese and Britney on the couch as they fell in a chair and kissed even more passionately. Reese and Britney both had smiles on their faces.

Cesar was on top of Brian and was kissing all the way down from his chin and Brian closed his eyes and let out a groan as Cesar reached Brian's chest. Cesar kissed his way down farther and father and pulled out Brian's shirt. As soon as Cesar buried his face in Brian's crotch, Reese screamed.

"Get thee out of his crotch!"

Cesar quickly stood up and turned around. Brian stood up quickly and blushed a dark red. Cesar blushed even darker and collapsed in the chair when he realized who it was.

"Oh," he said dismissively. "It's only you two." Reese and Britney were trying hard not to laugh.

"Oh my." Britney said holding back the laughter that threatened to escape. "That line, and and..." She couldn't hold it back and started to bust. Reese followed soon after and soon both were on the couch laughing harder then they've ever laughed in a long time.

"You..." Reese started, trying to catch her breath for she was laughing ever so hard. "Should have seen your faces!" She sobered a moment just long enough to see Brian tuck in his shirt again and re-buckle his belt. Cesar watched Brian and chuckled.

"I didn't even know I unbuckled your belt." Cesar said grinning. Brian laughed and shook his head.

"We didn't even notice Britney and Reese, don't be surprised at what else we didn't notice." Reese and Britney stopped laughing and stood up. Cesar grabbed Brian's arm and brought him to the kitchen. "What time is it?" Brian asked. Cesar glanced at a clock and groaned.

"We're not gonna be eating until at least eight thirty." Cesar said as he went back into the hall to grab the foodstuff. When he returned he noticed Brian was sitting on the counter in the same spot where he was sitting this morning.

"You better get down," Joey said walking into the kitchen. "Or Reese'll have your ass."

"I think I'd rather have Cesar take it, but if that's the price for sitting on the counter." Brian shrugged and smiled at Cesar. Cesar blushed and started to put together the sauce for the lasagna.

"You're making lasagna!?" Joey shrieked.

Cesar laughed and nodded. Joey beamed broadly and ran upstairs, all the while screaming, "Cesar's making lasagna!"

"Sorry," Cesar said blushing. "My lasagna's somewhat of a legend in this house."

Brian laughed and nodded. "I know what you mean. The gang loves when I make cheese omelets." Cesar smiled and kissed Brian's cheek as he set the sauce to simmer. "Hey, Bri?" Cesar asked glancing at Brian.

"Yeah, Rome?" Brian asked as he scooted of the counter.

"Can you hand me the can of peeled tomatoes and...Rome?" Cesar asked, raising an eyebrow as he took the can from Brian's hand.

Before Brian could answer, a breathless Chris entered the kitchen, his eyes wide with disbelief.

"You're really cooking lasagna?" Chris asked quickly. Cesar nodded as a small smile touched his lips.

"Yes," He said, "I'm really cooking lasagna."

Chris pretended to swoon and giggled lightly. "Glad I didn't eat anything at the mall then." Chris smiled and quickly ran back up the stairs.

"Rome, get it? Cesar, Rome?" Brian continued. Cesar chuckled and nodded.

"I get it." He said as he reached in the can of peeled tomatoes and squeezed one of the sauce. Brian raised an eyebrow but said naught.

Cesar finished squeezing the tomatoes and added the seasonings. After everything was put together and kissed Brian on the cheek and bounded off for the living room. Realizing that Brian wasn't following him, he turned and grinned at Brian, "You coming?"

Brian nodded and followed Cesar into the living room.

--

JC was moving the last of his belongings. Lance was busy hanging all of JC's clothes into the new closet. Chris saw all this and his mouth dropped open.

"W-what's going on?" JC looked up at him and kept moving his things.

"I'm moving into the guest room."

"B-but why?" JC dropped the box he was carrying with a clatter.

"If you haven't noticed we're kind of not getting along to well. I thought it would be for the best."

"Wouldn't it be best if we talked this out?"

"Well, Gee, Chris. I've been trying to talk to you but you won't listen to me. I want to save what relationship we've got left."

"I haven't been listening to you!? Dammit, Josh, can you blame me? You fucking slept with Howie!"

"And it meant absolutely nothing! It was TWO years ago! Two fucking years!"

"Than why are you still dreaming about it?!"

"That's the first time I've dreamt it!"

"Then why did you?"

"I DON'T KNOW! It just happened!" JC screamed, picking the box back up and leaving the hallway.

"ARGH!" Chris groaned and slammed the door to his room. 'My Room,' he thought. 'It doesn't sound right.'

--

JC slammed his own door and sat on the bed. Lance left the room. He buried his head in his hands and wept. He knew what he was doing was right, even though it was one of the hardest things he had ever endored. His mind was soon filled with memories.

They were doing a photo shoot in Niagara Falls. Nsync had just hit it big in the US. JC and Chris were walking down one of the lines of sidewalk jewelry stores not far away. They stopped at a collection of necklaces. Chris picked up one that had the 'Leo' star sign on it. He smiled to himself, remembering that JC was a Leo. He had been in love with JC for almost three years now. He sighed to himself, knowing he could never have him.

JC stood farther down, examining the 'Libra' star signs. He fingered one and sighed. It was Chris'. For so long he had wished to hold him. To fall asleep next to him at night. He wiped away a falling tear before anyone could see it. He looked at Chris out of the corner of his eye. He bit his lip and slipped the necklace off of the little rack.

"Excuse me. I'd like to buy this," JC said to the cashier.

"Oh, you're a Libra, eh?"

"No. It's for my, um, girlfriend," JC lied through his teeth. Chris heard this conversation. It broke his heart. 'Of course JC has a girlfriend,' he thought. 'Why shouldn't he? He's not gay and he's gorgeous.' He was clutching the Leo necklace in his hands. 'I can give it to him as a friendship present,' he thought. 'Friends do that.'

JC wiped a tear from his eye and fingered the Leo necklace around his neck.

They walked in silence. Both unaware of the gift the other had. They stopped and watched the falls. The sun was setting and the colors were beautiful and illuminated the scenery. JC tapped his fingers nervously against the restraining bar. 'Just do it.' He cleared his throat. Chris looked at him.

"Um..Chris."

"Yeah Josh?" JC melted. He said it with such ease. His name just seemed so much more beautiful when it came from Chris' mouth. He fished around in his pocket and pulled out the little bag.

"Here." he handed it to him and went back to watching the falls.

"Josh?"

"Uh huh." Chris pulled out his own, matching bag.

"Here." The two stared at each other for a few moments before gazing back at the identical bags. JC opened the bag with trembling fingers and pulled out the necklace. Chris did the same. "I-But I thought this was for your girlfriend?" he sputtered.

"I just told the cashier that," JC swallowed hard, still looking at the sign in his hand. 'I love you!' he screamed in his head. How he wished the words would form on his lips.

"I love you," Chris whispered. JC's head shot up.

"What did you say?" Chris stared back down.

"Nothing. I was just admiring the necklace. Thanks, Josh."

"No, you said something. It sounded like you said 'I love you'." Chris blushed a thousand different shades of red. "I love you, too." Chris stared at him, his jaw on the ground.

"You're not fucking with me?" JC shook his head.

"No, I'm not." Chris felt his heart leap into his throat as he beamed at JC.

"Let's go back to the hotel," JC suggested. Chris just nodded and followed behind his band mate. A huge grin played on his lips.

Chris stood in his room, throwing clothes everywhere trying to find the little carven chest. He finally found it and opened it. Tears spilled down his cheeks when he saw the Libra charm. It felt hot in his hands. He turned it over and over. Chris walked to the mirror in the corner and tied it around his neck. 'Until you come back to me.'

--

"Wow!" Brian said, surprised as they all sat around the kitchen table. "This is really good."

Cesar chuckled and watched as he ate his one piece while everyone had seconds, thirds, and even fourths.

"Thank you," Cesar replied grinning at Brian. "I pride myself on my lasagna, my spaghetti, and my bread."

"And you have GOT to try his lemon-pepper chicken, chicken parm, and his other Italian dishes. He won't teach me any." Joey pouted and sighed.

Cesar laughed as he cut himself his second piece while Reese started on her fifth. He shot her a strange look.

"What?" She asked, surprised. "I'm eating for two, now."

Cesar laughed and nodded his understanding, Brian started on a third slice while the rest were at least on a fourth.

"You know, you guys need to slow down. It's not THAT good." Cesar said as he ate some of his lasagna.

"Puh-lease." Chris said rolling his eyes. "You can cook anything and make it taste good."

Cesar blushed and just continued to eat. Once everyone had finished their servings, he took their plates and placed them in the dishwasher, then turned around and looked at the table.

"Well, this is a first for leftovers." He muttered under his breath.

"Actually," Brian said taking the last slice and putting it on a paper plate that he had grabbed from the cabinet and started to eat.

Cesar chuckled to himself as he placed the two empty lasagna pans in the dishwasher as well and turned it on.

Smiling as he turned around and everybody left him to clean up the kitchen, he began his work.

--

"So?" Reese asked as her and Brian reached her bedroom. She had asked him to come up there to give him the third degree. "Do you really like him?"

"Very much so." Brian responded softly, looking Reese in the eyes. "Reese?" He asked timidly.

"Yeah, Brian?" She asked as she motioned for him to sit on the bed.

"What's wrong with Cesar?" He asked softly.

"Do you mean the sadness that seems to follow him? Or his confusion?" She left the other blank.

"Well, I wasn't aware of the confusion." Brian confided. "But I'm more or less talking about the false fa‡ade he puts on. He acts like nothing's wrong, but he seems so..."

"Fake." Reese supplied. Brian blushed and nodded.

"I mean, I've only known him a short time, but I pride myself on be perceptive."

"It's okay," Reese said as she sat next to him. "I'll talk to Cesar tonight, are you staying the night?"

"Well," Brian said slowly. "He and I discussed it on the car ride on the way to the bookstore..." Reese waited for him to go on. "Yeah, I am." He said blushing.

"Nothing to blush about," Reese said smiling.

Brian smiled and hugged her. "Thanks, Reese. I'm gonna run home and pick up some clothes. I'll be back in a bit, all right? Tell Cesar that I'll be back in about forty minutes." Reese nodded and kissed Brian's cheek.

"Bye, Hon." He smiled and waved as he walked out of her room. Reese smiled as she picked up the brush to brush her hair.

--

It was nine when Cesar finally had the kitchen cleaned and was finally able to sit down in the living room and enjoy some sketching time. He grabbed his colored pencils and curled up by the arm of the big couch and started to sketch a picture of Reese's mother.

Reese walked out of her room and passed the window of the hallway to see into the living room. She saw Cesar as he sat on the couch to draw, she saw Joey and Lance sitting by the fire staring into it. 'Somehow,' she thought, 'We'll never get tired of these nights.'

She went back in her room and placed a robe around her shoulders. She smiled at Britney and Christina in bed together, sleeping soundly. Britney let out a little snort and moaned as she snuggled into Christina. Reese laughed quietly to herself and walked down the stairs, all along thinking about how to tell Cesar about her worries.

'It's a girl.' She thought to herself as he placed a hand on her belly as she walked down the stairs. 'A mother can feel these things, I'm certain it's a girl.' Reese sighed as she thought over names for the baby. Britney and Christina had accepted Reese's decision to name it herself. And she wanted to name it after Cesar's mother, who was her aunt.

"Raven Lyric Victoria." Reese whispered softly as she stepped down the stairs into the living room. "She's going to be a beautiful child."

--

Reese entered living room at ten after nine, she stopped in the kitchen to pick up two cups of coffee. One for her and one for her cousin. She sat down next to Cesar and offered him her cup of coffee.

"Brian went home," She said as she curled up next to him and rested her head on his shoulder. "To get some clothes and take a shower."

Cesar nodded and sketched a little bit faster. He blushed as he seemingly ignored Reese, but remembered that she was used to these mindframes of his. She was used to him nodded and shaking his head as he sketched pictures.

"She's beautiful." He said softly as he laid the pencil down. Reese too her eyes off of Cesar's intense gaze and glanced at the paper.

"Oh my." She said softly staring at the sheet of paper. It showed Reese and Christina with their arms around each other, Brian and some guy she's never seen before, Britney had her arm around a little girl and Cesar had his around Britney. Joey and Lance were standing behind Cesar with their arms around each other and Cesar, Ryan and Justin had their arms around Reese and JC and Chris were kneel down next to the little girl. "That's wonderful. We have to keep it."

Cesar nodded and sighed. "I just kept sketching, I let the picture take on a form of its own, kind of like how my mother would write." He kissed Reese and stood up.

"It's like, what? Ten thirty?" He yawned and shook his head and smiled as Brian came through the door with some clothes. "I'm going to bed. You're welcome to join me, Brian?" Cesar said grinning evilly. Reese laughed and shook her head when Brian blushed.

"Sure, lets go." Brian said as he yawned. Cesar grinned at Brian's blush as they jogged up the stairs. Cesar stopped at the window to the living room and flashed Reese a smile.

"Don't worry," He said as Brian walked passed him, "the baby will be all right."

'Once again,' she thought, 'He read my thoughts.'

"It's not too hard," Cesar said as he left the window, "You're an open book that very few can read. I've just known you for so long that it's gotten to be second nature to me. 'Night, Cous. Love you."

"Love you too, Cesar." Reese said softly, staring back down at the sketch. "Good night."

It wasn't long before the rest of the house floated up the stairs and fell into deep curls of sheets and dreams. Each wrapped around another as peaceful sighs echoed.

--

Cesar entered the kitchen with his arm around Brian and yawned as he went directly for the coffee. Britney and Reese were sitting there discussing birth control pills for Britney.

"They're supposed to clear up the skin and relieve some menstrual pain." Reese and as she kissed Britney.

"If that's the case," Cesar said as he took a sip of coffee, "Maybe I should take them."

Britney shot Cesar a look. "Puh-lease, if you take them they'll bring out your masculine side."

"I didn't think he had a masculine side." Reese said as she hid her smile behind her coffee cup. Cesar just spluttered and walked away.

Brian laughed at the three of them and shook his head. "Trust me, Girls." He said in a feminine voice, "He was ALL man last night." He said leaving the two women speechless as he walked away swinging his hips from side to side.

Mirage - "Hehe. I like Brian like this. growls ;) Oh yippity-freakin-do dah. Juju and Angel are back together. chorus of 'yay's erupt from the crowd

mirage sighs and scratches "kill angel" off the outline I was always a sucker."

Rowan - "Yeah, you're a sucker alright." Mirage - "What's you're point." Rowan - "No point. Simple fact."

Rowan - "Despite the tag-line, I am not a whore." Mirage - "Ignore him. He is so." Rowan - "Like you're not?" Mirage - "I'm not, I'm a cow, remember? Cow and Whore." Rowan - "Be careful, you might get cut up and eaten." Mirage - "I've already been eaten, thank you." Rowan - "Yeah right, like anyone wants cold fish." Mirage slaps Rowan and runs away. Rowan follows after. Mirage pokes her head out.

Mirage - "Bye Everyone! Thanks for reading!" Mirage looks behind her. "AHH! Rowan put that thing away! No one wants to see that! That's nasty! Put some pants on!"

Rowan - "I do have pants on you idiot!" Mirage - "Than grab a blanket! You're crabs are crawling all over the place!" Rowan - "Well where's the stuff you used" Mirage turns bright red. "She CAN turn herself into her own kind! Dear GOD! It's a miracle!"

Mirage - "You dick." Mirage pushes Rowan away from her. Rowan pushes back. There's a light scuffle as the wrestle and Mirage falls on her back.

Rowan - "Hah! Slut." Mirage - "I am no more sluttier then you are." Rowan - "Technically I'm a virgin. Spiritually, I'm a whore." Mirage - "Please, you're a whore phsyically." Rowan sticks out his tongue again and stomps out of the room. Mirage snickers.

Bye Everyone :) Really this time. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for Part 5!!

Rowan Grumbles If Mirage can get her head out of Brian's crotch before dinnertime.

Mirage - You're soo freakin dead!! Rowan - "As soon as you're done with dinner, dear. You can chase after me." Mirage runs out of the room.

Til next time. End Of Innocence Written By : Mirage (The Cow) & Rowan (The Whore)

Next: Chapter 4


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