If I Let You Go

By Jay ...

Published on Sep 7, 2000

Gay

Disclaimer: This story is purely fictional, and therefore it does not imply that any of the characters portrayed in this story (i.e. the five members of Westlife) are gay...

If you're under 18, then you might want to hit the "back" button on your browser. This story is not for you!

Check out my new WL fan*fic site @ www.geocities.com/westlife_idl where you'll find all the installments for "If I Let You Go", and a few other stories of mine!

IF I LET YOU GO (PART IX) Author: Jay Cee

Bryan opened the large oak door, it creaking on its hinges. mark and Kian walked through, and into the sitting room, Mark resting down in front of the log fire that crackled away.

"I'll get you something to drink Mark, 'kay?" Kian said, his smile as radiant as ever.

"Thanks Kian." Mark replied, a look of love and adoration in his eyes.

Bryan had closed the door behind him, and watched the exchange of words between Kian and Mark. He had noticed how close they were when they were walking back to the house. He knew that there was a lot more there than just an exchange of body heat between his two friends. It made him think back to what he had seen on the airplane back from Asia, how Kian had been holding Mark in his arms, comforting him. He was starting to put two and two together.

"Mark," Bryan said, walking casually into the sitting room, "I've been meaning to ask you something." Bryan sat down on the sofa, facing the warmth of the fire.

"What is it Bryan?" Mark said, his voice still sounding weak from his recent ordeal.

"Well, when we were flying back the other day, I, um, I found you upset, and Kian was comforting you."

"Oh, that."

"Yeah, well, I just wanted to know if you were okay, you know. If you wanted to talk about anything, just get something off your chest, I'm here to listen."

"Thanks Bryan," Mark replied, his face turning red with embarrassment that Bryan had seen him in the state that he was in at the time.

"So," Bryan started, but just as he said that word, just as he was about to confront Mark, Kian stood at the door.

"Here's your tea Mark," Kian said, staring deeply into Mark's eyes.

"You didn't get one for me?" Bryan asked, disappointed.

"You haven't spent the last six hours in the freezing cold," Kian replied. He sat down on the floor, close to Mark, the light of the flames reflecting off his deep blue eyes. Kian handed Mark his cup, Kian's fingers lingering on Mark's.

Bryan, sensing that they wanted some time to themselves, decided that it was time to go to bed.

"Well, its been a long day guys. I think its about time I hit the hay."

"If your bummed out about the teas Bryan, I can make you a cup," Kian said, not wanting Bryan to leave just yet.

"Nah, thanks anyway. Its nice to have you back Mark."

"Thanks Bry, goodnight."

"Goodnight you two."

"See you in the morning Bry," Kian said.

The sound of Bryan's footsteps disappeared up the flight of stairs, leaving Mark and Kian alone. There was an awkward silence between them, until Kian broke it, his inquisitive nature getting the better of him.

"What were you and Bryan talking about then?"

"Uh, well, he was just asking me about what happened on the plane," Mark replied, his voice faltering a little when he thought back to what had happened then.

"And what did you say to him."

"I didn't have time to. You walked in at just the right time."

"Do you think he knows?"

"I don't know. I think he was just worried about me, that's all."

"I'm glad none of them know. I'd rather keep it that way. Who knows what they'd think of us two being, well, being together."

Shit Mark thought Shane already knows.

"I want us to be together Mark," Kian said, his gaze locking with Mark's. "I'm so sorry Mark. I'm so sorry for hurting you. I didn't know what I wanted before."

"Kian."

"Mark, I was so worried tonight," Kian said, moving his hand onto the back of Mark's neck, making the tiny hairs their stand on end as Mark's heartbeat quickened, "They say you don't know what you've got until its gone, and God, they're so right Mark." A single tear rolled down Kian's left cheek.

Mark instinctively moved his hand towards Kian's face, wiping away the tear with a tender touch of his hand.

"Mark, I thought I was going to lose you out there. Not knowing where you were was killing me. I don't want to go through that again. Don't leave me Mark."

Mark edged closer to Kian, their lips meeting. Kian lets his lips open a tiny bit, but it wasn't enough for Mark, who hungrily forced his tongue in to explore Kian's mouth. Letting out a soft moan, Kian brought his hands around Mark's back, and pushed him down onto the floor, the two lovers rolling around, coming perilously close to the fire.

"It's getting hot in here," Kian said, his eyes wild with lust.

"This isn't hot, just wait till we get upstairs."

"I think someone's starting to get his energy back."

"Like never before Kian."

Kian stood up off the floor, stretching out his hand for Mark, pulling him up and into a tight embrace. They savored the moment, until they hear the sound of the front door knob slowly turning. Quickly standing apart, they saw Nicky and Shane walking into the hall, Shane and Nicky both looking relieved to see that no harm had come to Mark.

"Mark, thank God you're all right," Shane said, running to Mark, and pulling into a bear hug.

"Yeah, I'm okay," Shane replied, his voice cold, the memory of Shane's words still fresh in his mind. Shane let go, looking Mark right in the face, confronted with the hurt in Mark's eyes.

"Y'alright Mark?" Nicky asked.

"Yeah, I'm okay, thanks for coming out to look for me guys."

"Well," Shane said, sensing the tension in Mark's voice, "I'm going to sleep. Goodnight guys."

"Yeah, I'm going too," Nicky said, "goodnight."

"Goodnight guys." Kian replied. Mark though, was silent, gazing into the flickering fire. When the Nicky and Shane were safely upstairs, Kian broke the silence. "Why are you suddenly so quiet, hey?"

Mark let out a sigh, unsure if whether he should let Kian know what had happened back in the forest with Shane, before he had run off and become lost.

"I told Shane."

"You....why did you do that?"

"I needed to talk to someone, someone to confide in Kian. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay Mark, I understand. Why were you so cold to him then? He was happy to see you were alright, and you gave him the cold shoulder."

"He thinks we shouldn't be together. He doesn't want me involved with you, like this."

"What? It's none of his business what we do together. That Shane, always thinking about himself." Kian got up, heading towards the stairs, towards a confrontation with Shane. Mark followed close behind, surprised at his reaction.

"Kian, no, don't." he knew it was of no use. He stood at the foot of the staircase, silently watching his boyfriend walk towards Shane's room.

He walked down the corridor, his footsteps reverberating off the walls. But nothing could prepare Kian for what he was to see when Shane opened his door.


Well, there you go IILYG fans. Any comments or suggestions to jay102@hotmail.com

Next: Chapter 10: If I Let You Go 10 13


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