The Saga of Tuck

Published on Aug 25, 1998

Highschool

-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----

A'Tuck Time -*- Copyright 1998 by Ellen Hayes.

Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when used for satirical purposes.

This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and possibly sex. If you are legally not allowed to read materials containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading this. I am not responsible. Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish, state, and country.

All rights reserved. See the bottom for distribution rights.

A'Tuck Time

*** 07:54 24 Mar

"Hey," Debbie said as I walked up.

"Hey," I said back, and offered her a kiss, which she took, and then some. I was debating the possibility in my mind of just throwing her over my shoulder and carrying her off, when she broke the kiss.

"It's Ellen, hey, what'sup?"

I turned around, and it was Ellen. She was giving me the eye. "What were you doing over at Debbie's at eight in the morning?" she asked.

"Good morning to you too, nice to see you again," I shot back.

*** 07:56 24 Mar

Ellen looked like she couldn't believe it. Finally, she said, "No way."

Debbie looked at me, and I shrugged. "Guess I wasn't really there when you called, then. Must've been a mistake or something."

Debbie smacked me on the shoulder. "Don't fuck with her head this morning, Tuck." She turned back to Ellen. "No kidding."

*** 08:00 24 Mar

"Mike, you are such a jerk."

"What?" he complained indignantly. "I just got here!"

"That last thing you said, about Hooters last night..." George leaned closer. "I dreamed about it."

Mike's eyes shot open.

*** 11:28 24 Mar

George caught me as I was on the way to eat lunch with the Pack. "Hey, Tuck, come over here."

"What?"

"We gotta discuss something." Meaning, something more serious than just bullshit.

"Like what?"

"Like the upcoming first of the month?" He grinned at me until I figured it out. Next month was April...

"Oh, yeah, just let me tell Debbie what's up..."

*** 11:31 24 Mar

"Gosh, I have no idea," Debbie said innocently. Then she got a serious look on her face. "Oh, hey, can I ask you a favor? It's tax time for the business..."

*** 12:17 24 Mar

"Jeez," I complained to myself as we split up, "I got so much to do..." Programming, buying stuff, assembly at Mike's, taxes at Debbie's... this was gonna be an April Fool's Day to top last year's, though, that was certain.

On the other hand...

*** 14:53 24 Mar

"Hey, Deb?"

"What?" She kissed me hello. I almost forgot what I was going to ask. Again.

"Um, ah," I took a deep breath. "What were you gonna do for April Fool's Day this year?"

She assumed a look of innocence. "Me?"

*** 15:26 24 Mar

"Lisa?"

"Who's this?"

"It's Val." It was getting to be a habit when I called Lisa. Oh, God. "Uh, anyway, I was wondering, if you were gonna prank McAllen this year for April Fool's Day, I-"

"Who, me?" She sounded as innocent as Debbie.

"Yeah, and we aren't doing it either, so I wanted to make sure that we weren't going to conflict or anything. Timewise."

"Oh." Her tone had changed completely. "Um..."

*** 15:32 24 Mar

"So, anyway," I asked Debbie, "what do you think I ought to do?"

She rolled over on her bed and gave me a look. "I think you ought to take it, duh. Or I wouldn't have mentioned it."

"Yeah, but... I mean, a h- cosmetologist slash stylist..." Not a hairdresser. "Don't you think it's a little, strange?"

"Don't you think fifteen bucks an hour is nice?" she pointed out.

"Well, why don't you take it?"

"'Cause a, I've already got Junior Business League classes I have to take, and b, I have to run my own business. And c, next summer, I already have too much to do." Oh.

She added, "And d, selling Mary Kay is making me more money than just fifteen an hour. But if you got licensed, you could actually apply it to people, do real makeovers, help me out, and we could make TONS together."

Helen stuck her head in. "Valerie, are you going to stay for supper?"

Debbie and I looked at each other. Then Debbie's phone rang, and she dove for it. I thought about it a second, then nodded at Helen. She smiled at me and left, and Debbie was on the phone, so I turned back to the tax software. At least Debbie was a compulsive organizer.

*** 19:06 24 Mar

I somehow managed to sneak the clothes I'd gone to see Debbie in, past my folks, and changed before they thought anything was suspicious. Any more suspicious than usual, I guess.

*** 19:10 24 Mar

I waited until Brian had left the room, claiming that there was nothing on television. Aww. "Hey, Dad? I, I mean, Debbie had this idea, about next year..."

*** 19:12 24 Mar

His eyebrows had gone up and not come down. "How much?" he asked.

"Fifteen an hour, maybe more, Debbie said," I replied. "Depends on what I have to do, like coloring or perms or whatever."

"You'd do my hair for free, wouldn't you?" Mom asked.

"Mom!" She giggled.

Dad was shaking his head. "Fifteen dollars an hour. Y'know, when I was in high school-"

"I know Dad, you had to pay them ten quid a day for the privilege of working and you ate dirt and you were lucky to have THAT."

He put a big smile on his face. "Oh, you remembered!"

*** 19:16 24 Mar

"Well, at the very worst, it'd be a trade," Dad said. He was big on trades versus careers. "And, that's a fair amount of money."

"If you want to," mentioned Mom. "Don't do it just because of the money. You can't drop out of it once you sign up for it, can you?" I shook my head. "So you might want to think about whether you could actually cut people's hair all day, and like it." She made a face. "You'd really hate to be stuck with a job you couldn't stand, wouldn't you?"

Yes, Mom. I tried not to sigh.

*** 19:21 24 Mar

"Well, Kid, how about some driving practice?" Dad asked.

With my sixteenth birthday coming up, I was looking forwards to getting rid of my status as permanent passenger. "Sure thing!"

*** 20:44 24 Mar

There were days, and then there were days. I even managed to parallel park right today, in the dark. Well, I thought it went okay, and Dad wasn't clutching his chest in a fake heart attack.

*** 20:46 24 Mar

As I was going up to my room, Dad said, "Well, tell us what you decide about that class, okay? So we can rearrange your chores if you need to." Meaning, I don't want to look like I'm being nosy so I'll just hand you this bogus excuse so we can pretend I'm not.

*** 11:32 25 Mar

Mike dinged the play bell. "Everyone ready? So, there you are, standing in the grand ballroom, wondering why the lights went out..."

*** 12:19 25 Mar

"He's a sadist, I'm telling you!" Jill groused.

"Jill, ALL gamemasters are sadists. It's in the job description. Don't worry about it, it's nothing personal."

Kim snorted. "Says you. I think he likes the idea of our characters naked."

I shrugged. It was probably true. "Give the guy a break, he hasn't seen a live naked woman since his mom stopped bathing him."

They started to laugh. So did I. Mostly because, I wasn't in that category any more. Heck, I'd even seen these two in their underwear.

*** 14:55 25 Mar

"Hey, Tuck!" Debbie called. I turned around, and she was waving at me. "Come on, we're gonna get a haircut, and you can talk to John about the job thing."

"Ah..." I started to protest.

*** 15:24 25 Mar

"I just feel weird about switching around people," I told them as I got in the car.

"Well, you know he knows already," Debbie mentioned, "and it doesn't bother him." Sabrina and Pam both gave Debbie a look. Jill just stared out the window.

"It's..." I shook my head. "It's just a bad idea, trust me." I had read enough about identity changes, when I thought I was going to have to bail out of my then current life. Instead, my sister left for college, and life at home became merely masochistic rather than suicidal.

*** 15:49 25 Mar

"Hello, ladies, we'll have someone right with you," John called over the receptionist.

I sighed. And watched, since if I decided to go through with it, I'd be working here a lot.

*** 16:09 25 Mar

"So you're Debbie's friend, the one that wanted the job here?" John asked as he did whatever he was doing with my hair.

"Uh huh." Nodding seemed like a bad idea when he might have scissors in his hands. I liked my ears the way they were. Minus the blush, of course, but there was nothing I could do about that. "Well, one of them."

*** 16:18 25 Mar

It seemed like a better and better deal. He wasn't usually full of "stylists", so it would be giving him extra business, especially if I could get my friends to come in. Since I could do things cheaper than most of the current stylists, then I could charge them less. All they would HAVE to pay would be the $15 chair fee, plus supplies I used. Plus whatever I felt I could charge them. I could set up my own schedule, as long as I stuck to it, and I'd just have to spend an extra few hours a week taking care of walk-ins.

The catch would be, of course, I'd be working on people's hair and faces and stuff all day long. And, I'd have to be in class all year before I could even start. The idea of homework for a cosmetology class boggled my mind.

And I'd have to figure out who I was going to be working as before I actually started.

That sort of frightened me, when John said it, but he was cutting my hair in sort of a bi-gendered style anyway, like last time, and it wasn't like he didn't know already.

*** 17:34 25 Mar

"I'm still thinking about it," I told Debbie before Jill came out. She'd had a good touch up, and I guess gotten her eyebrows done too, because she almost looked like a natural blond now. "Hey, you look great! It'll go great with that dress, too."

She frowned at me, then smiled a Debbie grin. "So, Val, when's YOUR birthday?"

"April third," answered Debbie before I could lie.

Jill grinned at me some more. "Sweet sixteen..."

*** 17:36 25 Mar

"Debbie still needs help with her taxes, Mom. I'm sort of working tonight. It's not like I'm just gonna be running around at the mall or something," I tried to convince her.

*** 17:40 25 Mar

"Whhoooooo," I breathed as I came back out of the salon. "I thought I'd never get through to her."

"So it's cool, right?" Debbie asked. I nodded. "So that makes..."

Jill answered, "Six. Counting your mom."

"If you wanna come for dinner," Debbie asked me.

It seemed like they'd already planned it out.

*** 18:04 25 Mar

"Hi, kids," Helen said as we waved at her in the kitchen. "Dinner'll be ready in a few."

The rest of us pulled back into the living room to wait while Debbie went to set the table. There was only room for two, at best, in the kitchen. It was a small house.

Sabrina edged closer to me and said in a very low voice, "So her mom has no clue about you." I shook my head. "So..."

I leaned over and said back, "So when I spend the night when her mom's not here, it's no big deal."

Her eyes got really big.

*** 19:11 25 Mar

I sighed. The other girls got to talk and stuff while they did homework, while I got to work on Debbie's taxes. Bleah.

*** 20:48 25 Mar

"Finally!"

"You got it all?" Debbie asked. The other girls looked up from their homework.

"All of it. Jeez..." I hurt. That might have something to do with me not moving for a couple of hours.

Helen put her book down and looked at Debbie. "You made Valerie do all those taxes?"

"Mom," Debbie started.

"Oh, it's no problem," I said hastily. "It's good practice."

Helen gave me a very strange look.

*** 21:36 25 Mar

"So who cares?" Sabrina asked me. We were both getting irritated.

I sighed, and tried not to strangle her. "Look, it's not that hard. You just have to write everything down, so when you change signs you don't forget which ones are which." She glared at me like the entire field of mathematics was my fault. "I'm not making this up," I added.

*** 21:50 25 Mar

Sabrina sighed, and pushed the book away from her. "I am just tired of this," she mentioned.

"It's tiring," Jill agreed. "Hey, when's your curfew?"

"It's, oh, da- darn," Sabrina said, looking at her watch. "Like immediately."

"Let's pack it up for the night, then," Debbie suggested. "Sab, you get home, I'll take care of everyone else."

"Thanks Deb," Sabrina said gratefully.

*** 21:54 25 Mar

"You be good, okay? See you tomorrow," Sabrina told me, and then she gave me a hug.

"You too."

*** 22:07 25 Mar

"And I said," we all belted out.

"what about,

Breakfast at Tiffany's,

She said, I think I,

remember the film and,

as I recall, I think,

we both kinda liked it,

and I said, well that's,

the one thing we got."

Jill imitated the guitar part.

*** 22:26 25 Mar

We had dropped everyone else off, and I had changed, and now we were in my house, and Debbie was giving me a goodnight kiss.

"Gross," commented Brian as he pushed past us. I was gonna make him regret that, but Debbie put a hand down the back of my pants, and rubbed a little, and I lost interest. In Brian, anyway.

*** 11:26 26 Mar

Kim was shaking her head at me as I walked up to the Pack. "I don't believe you, sometimes. Dinner?"

"What?"

"Last night?" she reminded me.

"Oh. What can't you believe about it? I think I deserved at least dinner for doing all those taxes."

She shook her head, like I was missing the point entirely.

*** 12:16 26 Mar

Before we went to class, Debbie gave me a big hug. My chest, which had been kind of sore for some time, reacted painfully to the squeezing. I must've done something, because Debbie let go and gave me a weird look. "What?"

"Nothing, I... I think I need to take a vacation from Valerie for a while. That glue is making me swell up."

"What?"

*** 15:16 26 Mar

As soon as the door to my room closed, I slipped off my shirt. I wished my parents would invest in a few more degrees of climate control.

"Let me see," Debbie insisted, so I unfolded my arms. I stood there as she stared at my chest from a few inches range. And stared.

Finally, I asked, "Well?"

She stood up and looked me in the face. "I think you need to go to the doctor and have her look at it."

"Deb, look, it's no big deal, I just gotta stop-"

"PROMISE ME," she almost shrieked, then continued more quietly, "promise me that you'll have a doctor look at it."

"Okay, okay, I promise, next chance I get." She was being paranoid about this. Maybe she felt guilty or something.

She looked like she was at a loss for something to do next, so I grabbed her and hugged her, which made me considerably warmer, and gave us something to do for a while.

*** 15:54 26 Mar

"Nnnnnnnn!" she moaned frantically as she pulled on my ears. I really cared for her, but I wished she would remember that I had nerve endings all sorts of weird places like my scalp and my ears and so forth. Also that all my breathing portals were in front, and it was hard to do what she wanted if I passed out from asphyxia.

*** 16:10 26 Mar

"What is it with her?" Brian groused as he stood in front of the bathroom door. "Does she think she lives here or something?"

"Hey," I commented, "that's a good idea. Get rid of you and let her move in."

"Bite me!"

"No thanks, not my type. Besides, you're probably poisonous."

Brian took a swipe at my head, which I ducked. "Loser!"

*** 16:18 26 Mar

"What is it with you?" Debbie asked me out of the blue.

I looked up from my English. "What?"

"How can you just start on your homework after..." She trailed off.

I thought about it for maybe two seconds, max, then decided she was right, and threw my book over my shoulder. Then I jumped on the bed.

*** 17:04 26 Mar

Debbie sighed, and looked at my clock. "Lover," I still enjoyed hearing that, "I think I better get home before Mom starts asking questions."

"How can you think about going home after..."

She stuck her tongue out.

*** 08:02 27 Mar

"You gonna be able to come over tonight?" Mike asked.

I shrugged. "I guess so, dunno why not."

"We got a lot to do, you know," he warned.

"I know."

*** 11:53 27 Mar

"Roll it," Mike insisted, and Jill rolled. An eight. "You grappled onto him," Mike told her. "And...." he rolled some more dice of his own. "And he can't get loose, at least not this turn."

"I got him I GOT 'im!" Jill shrieked.

"Well, shit, hold on to him," I told her. "I run over to where she's got the bad guy-"

"But how do you know he's the bad guy?" Mike asked.

"I'm sure, she wouldn't have grabbed the wrong guy." Mike just shook his head.

*** 21:43 27 Mar

I staggered in the door, a little sick from the fumes and exhausted from all the work. Dad was in his office. "Have fun over at Mike's?" he asked. I just nodded, debating passing out there or in my bed. Bed, I decided. Then I remembered something.

"Hey, Dad," I mentioned casually, "it's my birthday next week, and the girls thought it would be cool if we had a party over here next weekend." His eyebrows went sideways, and I added, "Of course, you and Mom wouldn't want to be here for it, so I thought maybe we could sponsor a dinner out for you two." They went up. "You know, get to know each other, talk without the day to day pressures of being parents, have some nice QUIET private time together..." Meaning, we're gonna have the stereo cranked up, and your old fashioned ears might not be able to take it.

Actually, the girls hadn't thought of it, but I thought I might be able to get out of whatever evils they could conjure up for a Sweet Sixteen if I planned something else in advance.

*** 07:56 28 Mar

"Hey, Deb!" She looked up from her locker. "Party, my place, next Friday."

"Why?"

"For my birthday, silly!"

She frowned, like I'd spoiled her plans or something. Haha.

*** 08:01 28 Mar

Mike gave me a questioning look. "Yep. Assuming I'm not grounded between then and now," I reminded him.

"No sweat," he said confidently.

*** 11:33 28 Mar

"Oh, by the way, sleepover at Sab's this weekend, if you wanna go," Debbie mentioned quietly.

"What about..." I pointed at my chest.

"Just wear a bra, and don't use the glue," she suggested.

"Is Ellen gonna be there?"

Debbie shook her head. "She doesn't feel up to a big deal like that yet."

I gave her a look. "Like, how big?"

Debbie gave me this hurt look. "Don't you trust me by now?"

*** 17:09 28 Mar

We just finished putting everything away, and had a couple of minutes to rest up when George's mom got home. "Told ya," George said smugly as he put the curtain back in place.

"Oh, God, we're never gonna get all this done," Mike complained.

"No sweat," George said. Mike always worried. "Besides, we got all weekend."

*** 07:04 29 Mar

I woke up with a clear vision in my head of what I had to do. As soon as I went to the bathroom, I could start on some low level heavy-duty programming.

"Oh, man," I said to myself, "This is gonna be awesome...."

*** 14:29 29 Mar

The phone flashed, so I grabbed the pickle and answered it. "'Lo?"

"Hey, whatsup?" It was Debbie.

"Programming and chores. Whatsup with you?"

"Oh, consults, mostly."

"Making money?"

She giggled. "I'd better be, with all this work!"

*** 17:48 29 Mar

The doorbell flashed, and when I disengaged myself and opened it, it was Debbie. "Hi!" she said.

I peeked out and looked around, remembering the last time this had happened. No Pack waiting to kidnap me tonight. "Hi Deb, come on in."

*** 17:50 29 Mar

"Are you sure it'll work?" she asked, amazed.

"That's why I'm testing it out," I explained. "I'd hate to put all this work in and not get it right."

*** 17:53 29 Mar

"So what IS this thing?" she asked, grabbing the pickle.

"It's the controller for the headphones." I grabbed it back and started pointing things out. "See, it's got a dialer, and volume knobs and a little mixer thing and everything. That's so I can do everything without having to get up."

"You are such a geek!"

"But you like me that way, don't you?" I challenged. She kissed me for an answer.

*** 18:14 29 Mar

As I was doing my eyes under a streetlight, Debbie asked me, "So did you decide yet?"

"Decide what?"

"If you want that stylist's job next year."

"Still thinking about it," I mentioned.

*** 18:49 29 Mar

Sabrina opened the door. "Hey, you two, didja-" Debbie held up two bags of assorted groceries. "Oh, great!"

*** 18:52 29 Mar

Kathy looked up when Sabrina opened the door. "Oh, you again," she said when she saw me.

"Oh, thanks, nice to see you too." She blew me a kiss.

*** 19:33 29 Mar

"I don't THINK so," I said.

"But he's such a hunk!" Kim pointed out.

"Fine, you think he's such a hunk, YOU date him!" Kim giggled.

"I thought he was okay," Kathy mentioned, giving me a strange look.

I shuddered. "I guess, but..."

"Men are pigs," Lisa mentioned.

"Men are pigs!" I agreed.

Debbie nudged me, then studied her glass carefully. "Oh, I know one or two that aren't so bad."

"Who's the other one?" Pam and Jill asked at the same time.

*** 20:18 29 Mar

"And Tracy said, that if that sort of thing was gonna happen to her because of him, then she was gonna go find someone else that didn't have mob hitmen after them." Sabrina took a pull of coke.

"Oh, darn," I mentioned.

Lisa gave me a look. "Oh, Val, you are such a callous bitch," she said, and smiled to tell me it was a compliment.

Kathy made a face. "So how long have you geeks been playing Batman?" I pointed at myself and gave her a Perfectly Innocent expression. "Yeah right," she disputed.

*** 20:32 29 Mar

"Silver nitrate," Kim said, and waggled her eyebrows.

I thought and thought, and could not remember what it did. "So...."

"Duh! Don't you remember?" I shook my head, and she sighed. "It turns the outer layers of skin completely black. The only way to get it off is to take the skin off."

"And that was all over her face?" I gaped. Kim just nodded, smiling.

"And, she left it on overnight," Kathy added, "so it was GOOD and set in the morning." Pam and Debbie both started to laugh. So did I.

*** 20:49 29 Mar

I was coming out of the bathroom when I noticed Jill was waiting for me.

"So are you gonna take that class?" Jill asked me.

"I dunno yet! Why does everyone keep asking me that?"

Jill snapped back, "'Cause if you were I thought I would, 'cause I could use the money more than you, even." Which was true; if she wanted to go to college, she'd better find a scholarship or something, because her three brothers had slurped a lot of shinola out of the family funds already.

So I said, "Oh."

She shrugged.

"Well, I mean, you think I should take it?"

Jill rolled her eyes at me. "Duh..."

*** 21:02 29 Mar

As I sat, brushing Kim's hair, Debbie smiled at me, and said, "Me next!" I sighed. On the other hand, I could think of worse things to be doing. And I bet all of them could too, which is why I didn't say anything.

"So anyway, did you hear about Rob Sharp?" Kim asked the other girls.

*** 21:14 29 Mar

"So are we going or not?" Lisa finally asked the group.

"Going where?" Not like I was worried or anything, haha.

"Oh, Debbie didn't mention it?" When I shook my head, Lisa told me, "We were gonna go see Stepwise Pagoda tonight."

Kim flashed me a worried look. I smiled at her.

"It's okay, I can loan you something to wear," Sabrina grinned.

*** 21:27 29 Mar

I slid into the dark blue dress Sabrina had given me, and when I found the head hole and pushed through it, Kim was standing there looking at me. "Do you think this is a good idea?" she asked me in a whisper.

I nodded as I adjusted the dress. "It's cool, we got things worked out a little, pretty much. He's okay with it, for some reason." I shrugged. "Just don't mention anything to Lisa or Debbie, okay?" That worried me more than Jack did.

*** 21:48 29 Mar

Jill and I were sitting around bitching and laughing about how long it was taking the rest of them to get ready when Lisa finally had enough. She whipped around and pointed a hairbrush at us like a pistol. "Look you two," she snarled, "shut up or you're gonna leave here looking like debutantes."

We all stopped and glared at each other for a while.

Kathy came up behind Lisa, looked at all of us, and slapped Lisa on the rump. Lisa spasmed violently and whipped around, I guess expecting Debbie. When she saw Kathy smirking, she froze. I thought about it for maybe a millisecond, then lunged forward and slapped Lisa's rear myself. She squealed and jumped around, and took a swipe at me with the hairbrush, but missed. "Loser!"

Lisa took a step forward, raising the brush like a katana, but Kathy caught her arm. "C'mon, Lisa, finish getting ready. You can beat them later." Lisa gave us a last glare before she went back to finish her hair.

*** 21:53 29 Mar

Debbie came back into the room, wearing the dress I'd gotten her. I felt like someone had punched me; she looked awesome in it.

Someone poked me in the side, and I looked and it was Jill. "Your eyes are gonna fall out if you do that too long," she mentioned.

"Gah," I replied, looking back at Debbie.

"Gah yourself," Jill said, and smacked me in the head.

"Ow, stopit." I swiped at her, and missed.

"Loser," she taunted me.

"Are you two ready or what?" Debbie complained.

*** 22:18 29 Mar

As I watched Debbie get out of Lisa's car, I realized that I was gonna have to turn down the staring thing. Unless I wanted everyone to think we were a pair of lesbians.

I was thinking about the possibilities of that, and whether it would annoy Debbie, when Kathy tapped me on the shoulder. "Coming in, or do you want to stare at the concrete some more first?"

*** 22:58 29 Mar

The music was hot, the wound in my wallet where cover charge for two had been before I got here wasn't hurting as much... and Debbie was most luscious, and dancing with me. Yowza.

The band finished up a song, and then Tony spoke into the mike, "We'll be taking a short break about now, but we'll be back after these brief commercial messages."

Then all the guys chanted, "BUY! BUY! BUY!" and the lights went out.

*** 23:01 29 Mar

"Hey, you enjoying the show?" I twisted around in my seat, and it was Jack. I had a bit of heart attack, but he winked at me, and said, "Hey, Val, Mom let you out of the attic again?"

"Twice this month," Kathy commented, and sipped on her drink. "She's been a good girl."

"So how are you ladies liking the show tonight?"

*** 23:07 29 Mar

"Gotta get back," Jack told us, and gave Debbie a kiss on the cheek. Then Kim, then Jill, then Kathy, then Lisa, then Pam, then Sabrina, and then it was my turn. He didn't hesitate, and I didn't scream. Tony and Maddog did the same thing, all the way around the table. I was a little tensed up when they finally got back on stage.

"I think he likes me," Kim mentioned to Pam.

"I think you're crazy," Pam said back. They giggled at each other.

I leaned over to Debbie, and whispered, "I know someone who has a crush on you."

She pulled away so she could give me a surprised look. "What? Who?" she demanded.

I beckoned her back, and when she leaned close enough, I told her, "Me!" and kissed her in her hair where no one could see.

"Ahh!" she gasped, and yanked away so fast I almost fell off my chair. I thought I'd made a mistake until I saw her face, which was all screwed up as she laughed.

Pam kicked me under the table. "Would you two stop it?" she complained.

*** 23:11 29 Mar

"Wanna dance?" Debbie screamed in my ear.

I shook my head, and when she looked hurt, I almost broke. "It's my ankle!" I screamed back over the music.

Oooh, her mouth said silently. She cocked her head sideways, and asked, are you okay?

I nodded, and patted the seat. She bent over, and I said in her ear, "You go dance, I'll watch and save the seats, okay? If I do any more on this ankle tonight I'm afraid it'll snap off."

She leaned closer and gave me a peck on the cheek, and went to dance.

*** 23:22 29 Mar

Kim came over and sat down next to me, panting. I grooved to the music for a while as she cooled off.

When she tapped me on the shoulder, I leaned over. "I guess Jack is cool with things?" she asked. I nodded. "Huh. Weird. And he's not hitting on you any more, right?" I nodded again. "Well, he keeps giving Pam the eye." She snorted.

I said into her ear, "Hey, do something with Mike before you get jealous, okay?"

She laughed and pushed me, and I pushed her back.

*** 01:04 30 Mar

Tony said, "B'deahb'deahb'deah'b'that's all folks!" and the lights went out.

*** 01:06 30 Mar

They had a DJ start up almost immediately, so it was just as loud in the club when everyone came back to sit down for a while.

*** 01:25 30 Mar

"No, no, it was a great show!" I told big Mike, as we all stood around outside and yakked.

"You think? I mean, really?" I nodded. "Hey, did you get our tape?" I nodded again. "What do you think?"

These guys had almost no ego when it came to their music. It was almost sad.

*** 01:56 30 Mar

"Thanks for the loaner," I mentioned to Sabrina as I handed it back to her on the hanger. It had taken me a little while to figure out how to get it to stay there, but I guess that was why they had those little loops of string inside it. I was glad I hadn't ripped them out when I put it on.

"Not a problem," she shrugged.

*** 02:38 30 Mar

"This just keeps getting weirder and weirder," I mentioned.

"What does?" Debbie asked.

I pointed at the girls scattered around the couch beds, some of them wearing nothing but boxer shorts. Well, Jill was.

Debbie just shrugged. "Life is like that."

*** 09:14 30 Mar

"Val!"

"Uh?" I sat up, wondering where I was.

"Are you gonna get up this morning or what?" Someone was in front of me, complaining. I stared at them until they came into focus. It was Kim.

"Hi Kim." I debated getting up until I remembered that I wasn't at home. "Uh, yeah, I guess."

The chunk of a toaster discharging, told me that breakfast was almost ready.

*** 09:25 30 Mar

I was trying to eat a cinnamon roll without getting it all over my face, when I noticed a little movement out of the corner of my eye. I glanced sideways, very subtly, and it was Debbie pulling out a camera. I acted normal until she was just about to take a shot, then I reached over and kissed Lisa full on the mouth.

Flash! "Hey!"

I had to laugh. Now I wasn't the only one with embarrassing pictures floating around.

*** 11:04 30 Mar

"Cafe Queer?" I asked as Kim drove off.

She and Jill started to laugh. "You and Lisa this morning," Jill sputtered.

*** 13:53 30 Mar

Mike stared at me, really hard, as I came in, and I couldn't figure out why at first. Then I realized that he was checking to make sure I wasn't wearing something under my clothes. I glared back at him, then had a better idea, and started to flip up my shirt. He ducked under the table before he could have seen anything, if I'd followed through in the first place.

*** 18:09 30 Mar

"Well, Tuck, feel like some work?" Mike asked nastily.

"What, on the, uh..." He nodded. "Sure."

*** 22:56 30 Mar

We were right on track, I figured. If I could just get everything on my end, this would be the best first of April yet. Just more programming. Ah, me. My eyes hurt.

On the other hand, if I stopped doing homework and got back to programming, I wouldn't notice.

*** 14:56 31 Mar

"Whatcha doing tonight?" Debbie asked as we walked out to her car.

"Homework and sleeping, Deb. I'm really sorry," I added as I saw the look on her face. "I just have some stuff to do tonight."

She looked blank for a second, then caught on. She pointed back at the school, and I nodded. "Oh."

"Bring a book tomorrow," I cautioned. "Things might be confused."

She flickered her eyebrows at me, to tell me this wasn't the first time.

Something occurred to me just then. "Deb, if Lisa's pranking McAllen, then you must be doing something to Red Bluff. What is it?"

She just smiled. "You show me yours and I'll show you mine."

*** 00:17 1 Apr

I was expecting the tap on my window, but when it finally came, it scared me anyway.

*** 00:42 1 Apr

Mike and I huffed and puffed and finally got the stretcher inside the doors. I wondered if they were ever going to re-key the school locks to something effective.

George typed in the alarm code, and the safe light came on.

*** 03:54 1 Apr

"Nickerson's office next," Mike ordered as he put the paint brush back in the bucket, and put the cover on very carefully.

"I brought my own addition," I mentioned, waving the floppy case around. "Wait 'til you see this..."

"Okay, but you can do the thing with the boots on the way," he said.

*** 03:57 1 Apr

It was hard walking in someone else's galoshes, especially when they were three sizes too big. And even more especially when someone had to keep pouring blood on them, one foot at a time, so you'd leave footprints.

*** 04:09 1 Apr

"See?" I told Mike once I had the Trojan installed on Nickerson's system. "No problem."

When I turned around to see what he was doing, he was banging on his legs, trying to keep from laughing out loud.

*** 04:47 1 Apr

I went to sleep, for a little nap, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. This was gonna be the best yet.

*** 07:52 1 Apr

I got to school on the bus, and when we got off, everyone was standing around outside.

"What's up?" I asked some freshman.

"Someone chained the doors shut, like with padlocks and shit," he complained, pointing at the doors. "Nobody can get in, they can't get any tools to cut 'em open."

Gosh, what an amazing thing. I was glad I had dressed warm.

*** 07:55 1 Apr

"I wonder who would do a thing like that?" I asked Debbie as we both stared at the main building.

She shrugged.

I leaned over and whispered, "So what did you do to Red Bluff?"

She leaned back, still looking at the building, and whispered back, "Turned off the water main and chained it shut. A little more subtle than Lisa's idea."

I had to laugh, even when Debbie started smacking me for drawing attention to us.

*** 08:04 1 Apr

The Pack and Da Boyz had sort of clumped together. Mike was trying not to look anxious as the fire truck pulled up. I knew it was going to go well, so I just patted Mike on the shoulder and made sure I had a good angle. And that nobody was around us.

One fire guy went up to the door with a tool, and did something, and the door opened. He started to go in, then backed off real quick.

"Gee, you think something's wrong?" I asked George.

He shook his head. "What could be wrong? The doors were locked all night, and then chained shut. I guess," he added.

The fire guy walked back over to the truck, and all of them clustered around and talked for a while.

*** 08:11 1 Apr

A van pulled up. It said "Homicide" on the side.

"Wow, you think someone's dead in there?" I asked George.

"What did you DO?" Debbie whispered accusingly.

A news truck pulled into the parking lot. George laughed quietly and rubbed his hands. "Who's recording channel nine?" he asked. Book raised his hand. "Oh, good," George chuckled. "This oughta be classic."

*** 09:04 1 Apr

After the song ended, a very angry Nickerson came on the speakers and said that since class had been delayed an hour, we would all stay an extra hour to make up for it.

With all the people who had after school jobs in my class, not to mention the juniors and seniors, I had an idea about how well that was going to work. There were already people starting to protest, and even Dobson looked severely annoyed.

*** 15:01 1 Apr

I was sitting peacefully in my next to last period class, when the fire alarm went off.

Everyone in the class looked at each other, then we quickly began packing our books. I had a feeling we wouldn't be coming back today.

*** 15:04 1 Apr

"Supposedly, someone smashed in the windows of Nickerson's car," Pam was explaining as I sidled next to her.

"You think we'll get to go home after this?" I asked.

She nodded. "They'll never get things back together after this. And I think some people are already leaving." She pointed at the parking lot, where you could see a few cars zipping out already.

*** 15:09 1 Apr

Mr. Alston looked at his watch, looked over at a group of people from the administration talking to the fire department, again, then turned to us. "Kids, why don't you just go home, okay?"

We all cheered as we took off. I made a note to be nice to him in the future.

*** 15:48 1 Apr

Somehow, we all ended up at Sabrina's house, in her party room. I was a little nervous, but I figured I could duck into her bedroom and change if her parents came home suddenly or something.

The camera crew did some great work, filming the dummies almost perfectly. They looked like real people, sitting or kneeling on the floor in blood stained white robes. And the fake girl on the altar we'd made up looked truly grotesque.

The real cow intestines dangling off the side of the latex dummy were the perfect touch.

*** 15:50 1 Apr

They even showed the bloody footprints, though not where they led. I kept snorting and trying not to laugh. Nickerson had almost certainly given birth to a large cow. Or one big honkin' brick.

*** 15:53 1 Apr

"So you..." The girls were dumbfounded.

"So we talked to my cousin the butcher," George picked up the story, "and he collected all the blood for us. It's been hiding in a freezer for the last few days, with sodium citrate in it to keep it from clotting."

"It was probably the smell which told the fireman something was wrong," Mike chipped in.

"That was where the intestines came from too," George added.

I started to laugh. "But, but the crucified roadkill in front of Nickerson's office is probably what got him really upset..." and then I started laughing so hard I almost choked.

Mike explained, "Oh, we got lucky with that one, we found this, I dunno what it was originally, but it was dead when we found it, when we were going to school last night. So we stopped and picked it up-"

"That's gross!" Sabrina complained.

George pointed out, "Hey, it was already dead, and we made sure we didn't catch anything from it, so at least its death served a purpose."

"Is that how you got that woman?" Kathy asked. I pounded on the floor.

"No, that's what we spent the last week working on," Mike said. "It's a custom made latex dummy-"

"Weighs about three hundred pounds," I choked out.

"Shut up, Tuck. It's kind of heavy with the water balloons inside, that was to give it some weight, but it wasn't more than a hundred."

"And the rest-"

"Just clothing and masks, with some newspapers stuffed in the clothes to give them some shape. The good one was the sacrifice."

"Brenda," George held up his can in a toast, "you served well in your short life, may you be happy in latex dummy heaven. To Brenda!"

I managed to clink my can against his without spilling it, but it was a near thing, because we made eye contact and cracked up.

*** 16:13 1 Apr

"You people are sick," Sabrina accused us.

I was going to get upset at that, but I saw Kim, lying on the floor with her tongue hanging out of her mouth like a cartoon, and I lost it all over again.

*** 21:09 1 Apr

The general consensus was, it was a pretty sick prank, but no one was hurt, and the technical end of it had come off superbly. Especially when Channel Four blew it completely and reported it as a real cult murder on the noon news. I laughed so hard when I heard about that that I almost puked.

*** 07:03 2 Apr

When I woke up, I knew it had come time to pay the piper for the stress of yesterday, because the first thing I did when I woke up, late, is start coughing, and I didn't stop until I launched a chunk of something almost all the way across the bed.

This was always a bad way to start the day.

*** 11:16 2 Apr

"Oh, hey," I asked Doctor Treble as she was about to leave. "My, uh, my girlfriend wanted me to ask you about something."

She turned back around, and looked a little puzzled. "I, uh, well, she made me promise to have it looked at, so..."

*** 11:18 2 Apr

"How long have they hurt?"

"Uh, a couple of weeks, I guess."

"Were they swollen like this?"

I took a cough break before I answered. "Yeah, I, uh... I thought it was 'cause we were playing a little rough," I lied, "so I didn't worry about it." She gave me the eye. I shrugged.

"Are you and your girlfriend using protection?" she asked me straight out. I was glad my mom was still in the waiting room.

I nodded. "Condoms and she's on the pill. And we don't reuse the condoms, either." That had come up as an anecdote in health class. Some people deserved twelve kids.

*** 11:21 2 Apr

"Well, Eugene," she said, scribbling on the chart as I put my shirt back on, "I think you need a referral to a specialist to look at your chest. I'll tell your mom about it."

"Oh, come on, it's not that big a deal..."

She gave me the eye, like she had for years whenever I argued with something. "Now, who's the doctor again?" she asked. I sighed.

*** 15:16 2 Apr

I was sort of dozing on the couch when the front doorbell rang. I struggled up to go see what it was.

It was Mike and Debbie. I opened the door, but warned them, "Hey, I'm sick, don't get too close." Debbie looked upset. Mike just sighed.

"Well, our little disease vector," Mike said, "I figured that was the case, so I collected all your homework for you. Just in case you feel up to doing it." I snorted, since it was not really an option with my parents, and that turned into a cough, which turned into a major hacking session. When I got it under control, Debbie had pulled Mike inside and shut the door.

"Did you go to the doctor?" she demanded as I climbed off the floor. Sometimes it was too hard to stand and cough at the same time.

I sighed, "Deb, I've been through this a hundred times. Yes, I went to the doctor, she looked at me, it's bronchitis," Mike winced, "I'm on about five different drugs at the moment, and I'm gonna stay home for a few days and rest. And drink plenty of liquids, eat well, and rest." I smiled. "Did I miss anything?"

She looked kind of sad, all of a sudden. "No," she mumbled. I stared at her for a minute, until I had a flash as to what was going wrong. She had this really strange almost-repressed mothering instinct...

Uh oh, I thought. I glanced at Mike, and twitched my head at him to take off for a while. He rolled his eyes, but wandered off towards the kitchen. "Um, I guess I did." I waited for her to look up, and when she did, I told her, "Maybe you could help me with something?"

*** 15:19 2 Apr

Mike was watching TV, sucking on one of my Dews, and manfully ignoring Debbie fussing over me.

I was being extremely decadent, and letting her put the covers over me and get me stuff to drink and help me lie down and wrap my feet and comb my hair with her fingers and so on. It seemed to make her feel better. Come to think about it, it made me feel a little better too. At least she cared.

*** 15:28 2 Apr

"Oh, hey, guess what happened today?" Mike mentioned during the commercial break.

"No idea, what?" Debbie had had the bright idea that I wasn't warm enough, so she was behind me with her legs around me. I wasn't complaining. But I was definitely warm enough at this point.

"Nickerson went completely apeshit from yesterday, we had a pep rally except he was lecturing us on respect for authority and criminal behavior and blah blah blah." Debbie started to giggle uncontrollably behind me.

I had a sneaking suspicion there was more than Mike was telling me. "So what happened?"

Mike looked really innocent, and started cleaning his fingernails. "Well, you know the PA system they have in there has all these inputs, right? And I had my walkman with me, and remember that tape we made, of laugh tracks?" Thirty minutes of assorted clips from sitcoms and Bill Cosby tapes and wherever else we could find them.

"Yeah?"

"Well, some horribly disrespectful person," meaning either Mike or Dan, or maybe George, "connected up MY tape through MY walkman to the PA system, and every time he paused for breath, or at a dramatically appropriate moment, they played the laugh track." Debbie was doing a reasonable imitation of the laugh track tape herself, behind me. And, just like on television, if you heard someone else laughing, you started to laugh too...

*** 15:30 2 Apr

"So he is like completely psycho at this point, and throws the mike down and walks out."

"Oh, oh, oh God," I managed to choke out.

*** 15:37 2 Apr

"That boy needs to be taken down a peg or two," Debbie mentioned casually. She was referring to Nickerson.

"Yeah, but how?"

I could hear her giving us both a look, even from behind me. "The people who did that altar scene are asking ME how?"

"Who, us?" Mike and I chorused.

*** 16:44 2 Apr

Something moved under me, and I woke up, which made me realize that I had fallen asleep. "Hey," Debbie said from behind me, "I gotta go, let me up." I sat up as far as I could, and just sat there trying not to cough while she detangled herself from around me and went to the bathroom.

When I heard the door shut, I let loose, coughing up all the crap that had accumulated while I was asleep. Mike just watched, like he usually did. There wasn't anything else he could do.

"Better?" he asked when I finally stopped.

"Yeah. Shhhhhhhhhit," I breathed out. "I hate being sick."

"I hate you being sick, mi compadre," he said simply.

*** 17:38 2 Apr

"Eugene?"

I sat up, blinking, and then coughing. It was one of those things. Debbie and Mike said something to Mom that I didn't catch, since I was sort of making too much noise.

When I'd cleared myself out, pretty much, I asked, "What?"

Debbie, whose lap I'd been sleeping in, told me, "Your mom asked if we wanted to stay for supper, but I've gotta go home."

"I'll hang for a while," Mike said. Mike had some kind of hyper immune system; he never got anything I had, and he rarely got sick. When he did, though, everyone around him got it. He said it was due to his innate Chinese genetic superiority; everyone else said it was because any germ that could figure out his whacko gook genes was too tough to get rid of without a fight. Then he'd slap someone's head, and it would degenerate from there.

Debbie gestured at Mike, and Mike said something rude back with his hands.

"Hey, come on, you two, stop," I complained. "Be nice." I hugged Debbie to get her to be nice. She gave me a kiss, and I forgave her, like I always did.

*** 18:14 2 Apr

Brian bitched when I had a coughing fit at the dinner table, but he was overruled three to one. I didn't get to vote; I was too busy. I hated being sick, and I really hated bronchitis. Not that anyone else was really happy with me having it either, but no one was as miserable as I was.

*** 21:17 2 Apr

"Hey, man, I gotta get going," Mike said after he looked at the clock.

"Oh, yeah." I wasn't thinking too well.

He walked over and patted me on the shoulder. "You get better, okay? You gonna come in tomorrow?" I shook my head. "Okay, I'll get your homework again, and I'll run your character for ya."

"Thanks, Mike. You're a bud."

We gripped hands, and we held there for a long time. It felt good, having both him and Debbie over. The two people I cared about most in the entire universe, cared about me too. It was a good feeling.

*** 07:52 3 Apr

"What a shitty birthday," I told myself in the mirror as I went to brush the taste of dried phlegm out of my mouth.

*** 11:36 3 Apr

My phone flashed a few times before I woke up enough to pick up the wimp phone by my bed. "Uh, 'lo?"

"Happy birthyday, Tuck!" It was Debbie.

"Oh, hey." I felt good until I wondered where she was calling from. "Where are you? You're not sick, are you?"

"Nope, we're at school, and-"

"We?"

"We wanted to wish you a happy birthyday!"

"Who's 'we'?" I asked. One track mind.

Instead of an answer, I heard a whole bunch of people yell out "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Then Kathy asked me how I was doing, and I told her, and Jill said she hoped I got better, and that I'd better be well for my party, and Kim said she missed me, and on and on and on until most of my friends had said something to me, even Ellen.

I almost felt well enough to go to school after all that, especially when Debbie came back on the phone and we talked a little about how I should be treating myself. She was in favor of me being decadent some more, which I could go with if I could just manage to stay awake.

*** 15:22 3 Apr

The knock on the door was pretty expected, but it woke me up anyway.

*** 16:33 3 Apr

I couldn't stop grinning as Mike helped me drag all the presents up to my room.

"You really cleaned up this time," he commented as I punched the code into my door lock. "Those girls like you."

"Yep." Something occurred to me, so I added, "You know, if you stay cool with them, you might get a haul like this when it's your turn."

He let out an Evil Chuckle.

*** 21:08 3 Apr

"I might make it tomorrow," I mentioned as I followed him down the stairs.

"Well, I mean, stay home if you have to. Especially with the way Nickerson is going berserk. The last thing you need is to get detention for looging on his shoes."

We chuckled at the image. Although it did have a certain visceral appeal...

"Oh, by the way, someone sent him a present in the mail the other day. One large not too fresh roadkill in a box. He's getting peeved."

"Awwww." I was so sympathetic not. "That wasn't-"

"Don't be an idiot, of course not. I have better things to do with my time." And any roadkill that he found lying around. Like, throwing it under Nickerson's house... or putting it in his trunk... or tying it to his hood... or making lawn dioramas. That was especially good during the Christmas season. Or...

*** 07:54 4 Apr

"Better?" Mike slammed his locker shut.

"Some." I coughed some stuff up to clear my throat. "Not enough, but I was getting bored at home." And, unbelievably, I'd caught up on my sleep. I almost felt better than I had in a long time even including the bronchitis. But that might have been the fever.

*** 08:02 4 Apr

"... and supposedly, someone egged his house too, not surprisingly," George mentioned. Principal Nickerson had suddenly become very unpopular among the student body.

"Booooooring," Mike mentioned.

"Now, if someone STOLE his house, THAT would be impressive," I put in.

Mike thought about it, actually, before he decided that it would be too big a project.

*** 08:05 4 Apr

"And at this time," Nickerson added over the speakers, "anyone on the school grounds after three thirty, and not engaged in school approved activities, will be given detention. This is-" but whatever he said after that was drowned out by a roar of protest.

*** 08:11 4 Apr

"This man is becoming dangerous," Mike mentioned before we split up to go to classes.

"You know, I fully agree with you. So what do we do about it?"

Mike just smiled.

*** 11:39 4 Apr

"Okay, the party is Saturday night at eight instead of tonight. The more sleep I get, the better I feel." Jill and Kathy nodded.

"What're you doing tonight?" Sabrina asked.

"Sleeeeeeeeeping." Debbie wiggled her eyebrows at me, telling me something.

*** 12:04 4 Apr

I put my name on the sheet, and then got out of the way while Jill put hers. When she was done, we looked at each other.

"Me and makeup," she sighed.

"ME and makeup," I pointed out to her. She grinned at me, and we all walked off.

"It's your girlfriend that's doing it, you know," Jill pointed out. "If it wasn't for her, we would never have done something like this."

"No kidding," Kim mentioned. "I just hope we get to sit together."

"Can I cheat off you?" Jill and I asked at the same time.

*** 14:52 4 Apr

"Oh, sweetie, I want to, but I have so much to do tonight..." Debbie looked really frustrated.

"It's okay, Deb, really." I hugged her. "Just be there Saturday night, if you can."

"Maybe I could... oh, shit," she cursed with feeling, "three consults that day. Damnit!"

"Deb Deb Deb, calm down. It's not that big a deal. I'll see you at the party. Really." I held her, and stared at her until she looked convinced.

"You sure?" she finally asked.

"I'm sure. We did have spring break together," I mentioned, and kissed her. "And you helped a lot when you came over, with all the nice stuff you did for me." Actually, all the nice stuff I let her do for me. There was a mother lurking in her somewhere; I was sure of it now. "Now, you go on home, and I'll get some sleep and plan some party, okay?"

She sighed, "Okay." She gave me another kiss, and I finally let go of her. It was hard. Despite what I said, I wanted to take her home and never let her go again.

*** 18:44 5 Apr

"You're sure?"

"I'm sure, Mom. Besides, we're gonna have the stereo system cranked up for dancing. You really don't want to be here."

Mom gave me a look. "What kind of party, Eugene?"

"Mom! Just a loud dancing party. Chips and dip, cokes, that sort of thing. You know almost everyone that'll be here. Mostly Mike and them, and Debbie's friends, and a few other people. Not a bad crowd," I lied.

Well, not really lied. They weren't the sort to think it was funny to get drunk and throw up in the neighbor's yard. Which was the sort of thing that was going through Mom's head. On the other hand, we might be discussing Evil to commit on Nickerson, which I knew Mom wouldn't approve of.

*** 19:04 5 Apr

"They gone?"

"They're gone," I assured Mike as I opened the door.

"How you feeling?" he asked as he hustled in a couple of bags of groceries.

"Better, anyway. Almost well."

*** 19:31 5 Apr

"How's it coming?" Debbie asked.

"Pretty good," I mentioned. "Almost done loading the CD player."

Pause. I turned around, and she was giving me another one of those looks. "Loading it? Is it going to go off in the middle of the party?"

"No, it'll go off at eight and not stop until midnight. I hope you're in the mood to dance."

"What about you?"

"I'll go until I get tired or need to catch my breath, then I'll sit out for a while."

*** 20:18 5 Apr

"Lisa! Cool! Come on in," I yelled as I threw the door open again.

"I brought some stuff from lunch this afternoon, if anyone wants some food," she mentioned as she maneuvered the tray past me. "Who's here?"

"Mostly my friends from McAllen, but a few other people. Rachel's here too, remember her?" She nodded. "She brought a couple of her friends, and they said they like the party so far."

"No Travis?" she grinned at me.

"No!"

*** 21:17 5 Apr

Debbie was in the mood to slow dance, so I let her lead me around, totally out of time to the music pounding out of the speakers.

*** 21:50 5 Apr

"I got you something else," Debbie mentioned as I looked over the chips for something interesting.

"Oh, like what?"

"C'mere," she purred. I went.

She looked around, then peeled the dress top away from her body. I looked inside, and saw something in a very deep green, over part of her body. I reached in with a finger, and rubbed it. "Silk?"

She nodded. "Teddy. I got one for me, and something, well two somethings for you." She rubbed her body up against me. "Silk feels sooooo nice against your skin," she observed as she bent her head down and nipped my neck.

"Oh?" I managed after catching my breath.

"Mmmmm hmmmm," she agreed as she licked my ear.

*** 00:36 6 Apr

I lay there in bed, enjoying the feel of Debbie, in silk, writhing slowly against my body, in silk. Something called a camisole, and boxer shorts. I was glad we hadn't really done anything; hand washing clothes was not my favorite chore. Not to mention the fact that any serious exertion could produce a couple of mouthfuls of the most disgusting-

"Mike's gonna kill me," I mentioned. Not to change the topic of my thoughts or anything, haha.

She thought about it for a little while. "Jealous?" I nodded. "I think Kim was talking to him when we came up, after everyone else left. I don't think he'll notice."

I laughed, and reached over and kissed a nipple through the silk.

*** 00:51 6 Apr

"They're busy," Debbie whispered to me as she pushed me back up the stairs. I snorted.

*** 01:11 6 Apr

"Hi," I said to them as they gazed into each other's eyes.

They both jumped back and glared at me.

*** 01:23 6 Apr

"Great party, man," Mike said, shaking my hand. "You didn't tire yourself out too much, did you?"

"Not really, I guess." I yawned. "See you tomorrow?" He nodded.

*** 09:14 6 Apr

The phone flashed me awake, and I finally rolled over and answered it. "'Lo?"

"Hey, Val, you up yet?"

"Kim, don't you ever sleep?"

"Jeez, Val, don't you do anything BUT?"

"I've been sick!" I protested.

*** 09:44 6 Apr

I waited up in my room until the doorbell flashed, then made a dash for the front door.

*** 10:38 6 Apr

"So how did you like your other presents?" Kim asked mischievously.

I glanced at Debbie, who was giving me one of her trademark grins. "I'm wearing 'em," I told her.

"Me too," Debbie giggled.

*** 11:21 6 Apr

We were laughing about Mike's attempt at cool dancing when Debbie made a nasty face. "Deb? What-"

She waved a hand at me, and reached into her purse, and pulled out a bottle of Tylenol. "Let me out," she asked, taking two pills and swallowing them. I eased out of the booth, confused. Jill and Kim looked concerned, but it looked like they knew what was going on.

When Debbie stood up, I grabbed my purse off the table and followed her to the bathroom. She didn't even notice I was there until I held the door open behind her. "Wha-"

"Deb, what's wrong?!" I was worried about her.

She sighed, and leaned against the wall. "Just...." She looked up at me. "I'm starting my period; it hurts. I get really bad cramps."

"Oh..." Oh.

She gave me a weak smile. "I'm glad you had the party last night. I don't think I could have a lot of fun tonight, like we did."

Oh. Ooooohhhhhhh.

*** 11:25 6 Apr

"Shit, Val, it's not like it's your fault!" Jill told me.

"I know, it's just..." I looked over at Debbie, who had her eyes closed.

Jill kicked me in the leg. "I'm serious!" she insisted.

*** 12:09 6 Apr

"I don't mind gay guys!" Debbie insisted when we shut the car doors.

"What about that boyfriend you keep mentioning, the one that went gay on you, whatsisname-"

"Val, the problem I had with him, was that he was sleeping around behind my back." She poked me in the chest for emphasis.

"Aaaahh!!" I complained. It hurt like a sonofabitch.

Debbie glared at me, and pointed her finger at me like a rapier. "Did you-"

"Yes! Last week, I gotta go see someone else next week, thank you very much! I'll probably get stuck for it, too." I hated giving blood samples.

*** 13:55 6 Apr

"Can I watch?" Debbie asked. Unlike last time, she didn't have homework to do.

"Sure, I dunno why not. Just keep the sarcastic comments down."

"I wouldn't-"

"Yes you would! It's impossible to resist, Deb. You can't stop yourself. Just keep 'em down."

*** 14:14 6 Apr

I rolled dice, and got a nice big fat seventeen. "Oooh, fumble," Mike commented with false sympathy. "You thought you were spearing the guy through the chest, but what you did instead was trip on something and dive completely past him, on the left. You're on your belly now, wondering why the floor rose up and hit you."

"Oh, shit," I said.

"You idiot," Debbie mentioned.

"See! I TOLD you you couldn't keep it in!" I accused her. She looked shocked until she remember what I was talking about.

*** 18:14 6 Apr

"Tuck?"

"Yeah?" She sounded funny, so I looked over at her to see what was wrong. She had that vulnerable look again.

"Lisa's busy tonight," she started, then paused. "Can, can I stay with you for a little while?"

I told her gently, "Sure, Deb." I squeezed her hand. "Anytime."

*** 21:11 6 Apr

Normally I didn't like doing my homework on my bed, but Debbie wanted me near her, so I sat next to her. She curled up around me as she slept. When I could see her face, she looked so fresh and, well, young. When she was awake, she could easily pass for a college student. Now she looked almost girlish.

Every so often, she'd wake up and touch my leg or move closer or something, and go back to sleep.

I wondered if I could keep her here forever.

*** 07:55 7 Apr

"Gotta go to another doctor this afternoon," I grumbled to Mike.

"About your cold?"

"Nah, something else Debbie wanted looked at." I shrugged.

He looked upset. "It's not...." He stopped, and fumbled with some words, then finally leaned close and whispered, "It's not VD or something like-"

"No!" I sighed at him, and finally said, "Something else, I just gotta have it looked at, and my doc, she wanted me to see someone else."

"Need a ride?"

"Mom's taking me. Thanks."

*** 16:18 7 Apr

"Hmmm. I think we need to get a couple of blood samples," the doctor said.

When I groaned, the doctor looked at me. "I knew this was gonna involve me getting stuck," I complained.

"Eugene," Mom warned me.

*** 08:00 8 Apr

"You gonna die this week or next?" Mike asked me when I sat down.

"Ha ha ha. I gotta go back Wednesday when my ever so precious blood gets tested for whatever and they get the results faxed back."

*** 11:31 8 Apr

"I went, I gotta go back," I told Debbie as I unpacked my stuff.

"Uh, bummer," she grimaced.

*** 15:14 8 Apr

Dad was home when I opened the door. This was highly unusual. I wondered for a second if I'd given him my bronchitis.

"Hey, kid, feel up to getting your driver's license today?" he grinned.

"YEESSSSSSSSSSS yesyesyesyesyes!!!"

*** 17:02 8 Apr

"Mike! Guess what?"

"You and Debbie switched bodies and she's in jail for hacking and you're busting her out."

"What!? NO! I got my driver's license!"

"What? Oh, man, cool!"

*** 18:03 8 Apr

I was heady with the power of being in the driver's seat. Especially one without my dad next to me. So we, being the guys, because Debbie was doing a couple of consults tonight, were going out to celebrate in the traditional manner by going to a drive-through.

It was kind of dumb, but it worked for us.

So I read off the order at the speaker, and high fived Mike as the girl read it back. She ended with, "That'll be twenty three thirty nine, ma'am, please drive up."

I was crushed. George was not, and neither was Dan as they laughed and laughed and laughed. I groaned, and debated running into a bridge pillar, but realized that Mike and I would die first, and they might not. So I pulled around to the window instead and thought about how I could poison their food.

"Hey, Tuck, thought you sounded familiar," Kathy grinned from the window. "Didja get your license?"

"Yah, finally!" She gave me an ecstatic thumbs up. Now I felt better again.

*** 19:33 8 Apr

"That is soooo cool!" Debbie gushed. "So, when do you want to learn to drive my car?" Debbie had a stick shift. I kept my clever comments about girls with sticks to myself after finding out how devastating her backhand was.

*** 11:39 9 Apr

"Oooooh," most of the girls said, looking over the license.

Kim looked up at me, puzzled. "So, which flea market did you buy this from again?"

Debbie and I poked her sides until she screamed for mercy.

*** 16:04 9 Apr

The nurse said, "Doctor Haverston is ready to see you now." Mom and I got up, and followed her into an office, not an exam room.

*** 17:39 9 Apr

"Eugene?" Mom asked, but it was like she was really far away; I could barely hear her.


"You know, if we hadn't left Vietnam, we'd still be there." - the SO

Distribution: No part of this work may be distributed as an original work by another person or group. Permission is given to redistribute this by electronic means, as long as the entirety of the work (from the BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE header to the END PGP SIGNATURE footer) is distributed, and credit is given to the original author, me. Archiving is permitted provided no fee is charged for access.

All rights reserved.

"Tallyho!" \ / @>--,--'-- ehayes@nym.alias.net + vicki .sig Ellen Hayes --=()=()=-- Renaissance Woman ==[-------- + virus 9.1a

http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/Heights/5734/

-----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: 2.6.2

iQCVAwUBNVargXYDebnvyV1VAQF6KQP/aQSxq/PkyHZH+mnY1lQVtu+Vq+4JL64J naXSfGYsC665vFV34ez2aY5AYjSAr1PN4n9fPcKfWQYje6HbdZqvQ92Jhg/BA0zA FvE4/AzWVkzZnqSRVjsxwenV4XzA1NM7DChngFjM1q+JgsWy1NDgyWqs3y77vQXK r7gGzDArc7k= =KKe1 -----END PGP SIGNATURE-----

Next: Chapter 9


Rate this story

Liked this story?

Nifty is entirely volunteer-run and relies on people like you to keep the site running. Please support the Nifty Archive and keep this content available to all!

Donate to The Nifty Archive