X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X
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X If I Should Die! X
X by Vince Water X
X Revised: 8/23/06 X
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What an ominous title. It quite literally means that If I should die, or
something happens to me that stops my flying fingers from achieving their
goal to write Mike's story, I'd want the content of this file to be posted
with the Nifty Archive so that Readers will know about the events and goals
I've planned for the following series:
"New to Love"
"New to Teaching Love"
"New to Love Honeymoon"
"New to Love Again"
"New to Love Shaman"
I'm not expecting to kick the bucket anytime soon. I've written story parts
to the first three series listed above and hope to complete the penology.
I've thought late into the night on many sleepless occasions about the events
and goals for Mike and Jesse's saga. I want to 'complete' their journey in
life, well... at least their beginning struggling year as a gay couple.
DO NOT READ FURTHER! Please honor my request that the contents of this file
will only be read should I fail to complete these five series. Download it
into your computer. Hopefully, there will be no need to read this text when
I do complete this saga as planned. A 'countdown' begins so you can opt out.
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PLEASE DON'T READ FURTHER. Really! Not unless something has happened where
I'm not posting more story parts with the Nifty Archive, my Yahoo! Group and
I fail to respond to Reader emails at:
Vince_Water@HotMail.com
Vince_Water@Yahoo.com
Updates to this text will be posted from time to time on my Yahoo! Group:
www.groups.yahoo.com/group/NtTLStoriesAndSketches
I've written story 'clips' that will appear in future series parts in the
'Singing.txt' file. This text can be found on my Yahoo! Group.
If you have read this revealing text and wish to comment, send me an email
but DO NOT post messages on my Yahoo! Group as they'll be deleted. I don't
want to ruin the surprise in store for my other Readers. Thanks.
INTRODUCTION:
I started writing gay erotic 'Indian boy' love stories in the summer of 1988
from my frustration of not finding anything related to read. It wasn't my
intention to become a 'writer' but simply to express my imagination beyond
fantasizing in my head. Typing out words on my Apple ][e computer led to
sentences, paragraphs and eventually a completed story that was very
exciting and 'real' to me. My first self-printed book: "How Willow Bird Finds
His Love" was the result. I paid for illustrations to be rendered and this
book was distributed through the A Different Light bookstore chain in the
1990's. The novel, "Bare Butt Brave" followed. More 'booklet' titles were
produced by me but it was a lot of work to write, illustrate, print, and
distribute them. The political climate for my youngish subject area proved
such that even ADL Books was wary to put them on their shelves in the late
1990's. My thanks to Richard Labonte for his courage while being the manager
at the San Francisco bookstore. I don't think that Richard was personally
interested in the youngish subject of my stories but 'opened' his bookstore
to all ideas and expression. I've heard that he retired to a 'gay farm' of
friends in Canada.
At this sad point in time when I found myself without a bookstore 'home' for
my booklets, the Internet was coming into its own. I discovered the Nifty
Archive where David provided a place for writers to post their stories for
everyone in the world (21 years or older, mind you) to freely read and enjoy.
All my time could be spent on pure writing without the laborious mechanics of
printing booklets for limited distribution. Way to go, David! Yet he too
faces opposition from forces in these United States that threaten to shut him
down in spite of 1st Amendment protection rights for freedom of speech. I ask
that you make a donation to the Nifty Archive to support David's efforts.
www.Nifty.Org/
I computer entered all my printed story texts, enhanced and edited them for
distribution on the Internet. Readers responded by sending me emails. This
was a new experience for me since I'd rarely received 'snail mail' in care of
the ADL stores in response to my booklet sales. It was through Reader email
correspondence that I was no longer isolated in my own 'world' but could See
what I've written from other points of view. Luke came along when I was early
into writing story parts for my first serious work: 'New to Love'. He's been
helping me ever since and my heartfelt thanks goes out to Luke. His partner
rendered erotic sketches of Mike, Jesse, Jake, Running Water and grandfather
that gave Readers and myself our first visual glimpse of the characters I'd
been writing about. My thanks also goes out to him.
Along the way on my journey to write stories, I collected gay stories from
other writers, downloaded erotic Native American and Asian men images,
drawings and movie clips that fed my imagination. All this material was put
on computer CD's which I entitled: 'Artwork & Stories' freely mailed to adult
Readers in the United States who requested it. The eBook renditions (Adobe
Acrobat files) of my out-of-print booklets were also included in this erotic
'collection'. So much material now that I've put it on a computer DVD-ROM and
supplemented it with three other titles: 'Erotic American Indian Men',
'Erotic Young Asian Men' and 'Erotic B&W Guys'. It's my hope that others
will share in my enjoyment of this collection and my stories will live on
beyond me.
What did I mean about 'New to Love' being my first serious work? Well. Up to
then, my stories were very sexual with the intent of getting off on them.
That's what primarily motivated me to write. Remember, I didn't set out to
become a 'writer' but to put down my fantasies into words to make them more
'real' with a written story versus keeping them in my head. I sometimes go
back to an earlier story and read it, surprised by how much I'd forgotten
about the story and am glad that 'documenting' it in words has preserved it.
The 'New to Love' saga is my attempt to express more than sexuality but the
feelings for being gay in a realistic setting of mundane every day events my
characters would go through based on my own life experiences. Mike Yager is
who I wish I could have been at his age. He and I share many characteristics.
In some ways, Jesse is also me. And Running Water, Simon, Hawk Flying Over...
All these characters represent an aspect of myself that I am or wish I could
have been. Mike is closest and dearest to my heart and that's why this saga
is written from his first person point of view.
In the 'New to Love Shaman' series that'll complete the saga, I'll write it
from Mike's point of view as I've been but since his nextself lover undergoes
shaman training with his grandfather for weeks at a time, I'll write those
scenes in narrative form so Readers will know what's going on though Mike
necessarily won't.
At the time this text has been revised, I've completed the 'New to Love'
series with twenty story parts. The second series, 'New to Teaching Love'
stands at eighteen completed parts. I'm currently working on parts 19-22
with Jake's character having been recently introduced. This gay 16 year old
boy is not my creation! My good friend Luke offered me an outline in May 2003
and after two years of working out the details, Jake has 'come into' the NtTL
series. It was proving difficult to incorporate an 'outside' character into
my fantasy world. I wanted Luke to be happy with my rendering of Jake while
making him my own in this saga. Finishing the NtTL series will prove if I've
succeeded or not. You can read the correspondence I've had with Luke in the
five 'A Story Outline for Jake' texts posted on my Yahoo! Group. I've recently
posted these texts with the Nifty Archive as well found in the JAKE folder.
The 'Honeymoon' series was originally planned to comprise only one story
part. I wanted to write a nice account of Mike and Jesse's honeymoon outside
the sequential story parts to the 'New to Teaching Love' series. This has
turned into a series of its own with M&J being sent Back in time to 1891! No
longer are they subject to mundane daily events from 2003 but thrust into
unknown territory. This is proving very exciting for me to write and from
the emails Readers have sent me, they are also interested to read about this
couple's exploits in the past. A lot of research was done to keep this series
true to the historic things M&J will see and interact with in 1891. It's
important to me that I write events accurately and keep them believable for
my Readers.
I've now given you a small understanding of where I'm coming from, the reason
that I write and the purpose for why this text was composed. It's still not
too late to STOP reading further! I intend on completing the 'New to Love'
saga but who knows what the future may bring? If I'm prevented from finishing
it, it's my hope that this text will provide Readers with closure and all
them sleepless hours I've spent late at night composing future events and
story plots in my head for the saga won't be for naught.
What follows after the 'Basic Story Premise' and background information are
the story goals and events that I hope to achieve with the NtL saga. You'll
get a grasp of what I'll be writing about. NOTHING is written in stone
though. My flying fingers often prove to have a mind of their own so events
in my stories could very well change the direction of my five series and
events given below may not occur. Read the details under each of the series'
titled heading for what I've planned to write.
BASIC STORY PREMISE:
White guy and Indian guy meet and fall in love. How they keep it together
admits clashing cultural differences and beliefs, gay prejudice (where they
seek acceptance to their love that just felt right), 'Indian magic' and the
problems that life throws at them is the journey of Mike & Jesse's saga.
They are 'new to love' themselves yet help others to accept their sexual
orientation and find love for themselves.
The 'New to Love' saga takes its inspiration from two earlier story series
that I've written. By reading them, you'll gain a better understanding and
appreciation for Mike and Jesse's former selves, and Charms A Bird as a
nextself through a line of boys from Willow Bird.
'Bare Butt Brave' accounts how Brave Bad-eyes (Jesse's former self) stole
out a white youth of fifteen named Christopher (Mike's former self) from the
White man's fort in 1858 to live with the Blackfoot as lovers.
The 'Willow Bird' saga accounts this fifteen year old Omaha boy's adventures.
He became the next Leader of the Mahyee-na, a secret brotherhood of gay men
who fought against Evil. He 'died' in 1836 but Passed his spirit and memories
into his nextself, the eight year old boy Running Wolf. At 32, he met Chris
(Mike's former self) in the Blackfoot camp, Healing the boy's stomach ulcer
and gave him an Arrow of Power to be put in Good-eyes to protect him from
Evil. At 45, Running Wolf Passed himself into the boy Many Arrows In Hand.
Mike and Jesse meet this 24 year old shaman in 1891 ('New to Love Honeymoon')
and after an unsuccessful hunt for Trickster Eli Kie, this shaman was Brought
forward in time to 1931. At age 40, Many Arrows In Hand Passed himself into
the boy Runs-through-grass. At age 58, he Passed himself into the 16 year
old teen Charms A Bird who Mike and Jesse met in 2003 seeking his aid.
BACKGROUND:
Mike Yager was born on June 11, 1977 and he is nearly 26 years old. Jes-ee-ah,
son of Looks-from-mountain was born on July 20, 1979 and he is nearly twenty
four. These two guys met on April 7th, 2003 and fell in love... again.
Mike's former self was Christopher Walker who was born June 11, 1843. At age
fifteen, he fell in love with a seventeen year old brave of the Blackfoot
named Bad-eyes. Chris was called 'Kris' or 'Krist-o-fer' by the People and
never given a proper Indian name. Nearly having had reached the age of 18,
Chris was murdered by Eli Kie, a half breed Blackfoot brave. This initiated
Eli Kie into becoming Trickster, an Evil servant of the Darkness-that-comes.
Jesse's former self was Brave Bad-eyes who was born in 1841 (no boyhood name
ever given). In 1858 while guarding over his father to be painted by Catlin
in the White man's fort, he met and fell in love with Christopher. The next
day, he brought six buffalo hides to trade for this White boy but ended up
having to steal him out of the fort instead. They lived as lovers amongst the
Blackfoot. Brave Bad-eyes was given his warrior's name of Good-eyes when he
led the other men against the blue-coats (U.S. soldiers). He later became
chief and then shaman. Upon this old man's death, he crafted the Power
Bundle whose spirit Passed into Mike and Jesse that became their 'child'.
Special abilities are granted to this couple. Gleaning for Mike, and Jesse
can Look into people. The two can mind speak, Share emotions and Draw on the
strength of each other. Their former selves became visible to them. Only Mike
has Merged with Christopher, his former self. Jesse would be overwhelmed by
Good-eyes, his former self because he was an old man with many memories to
deal with so Jes only Delves in them at need; not 'living' them as Mike had
done with Chris.
Mike is the son of Michael Yager and Linda Shore. His maternal grandmother
was Betsy With-a-big-voice who was the daughter of Shirt-for-man (mother) and
Christopher Walker. That means Mike is both blood related and Merged with his
former self!
Jesse is the son of Looks-from-mountain (father) and Winnapah. His mother's
mother was the sister to his grandfather, Shaman He-who-runs-up-mountains
whose father was Meek-buffalo whose father was Good-eyes. That means Jesse
is both blood related and is Shaman Good-eyes' nextself but only in spirit;
that old man's memories weren't 'lived' by Jesse since they would have
overwhelmed him.
ADDITIONAL BACKGROUND INFORMATION:
At the risk of repeating some of previous information given, here are some
details that supercede any previously given in the series with clarifications
and fudging over of errors. I've tried to keep the story historically
accurate but some dramatic license has been taken. For instance, the Chippewa
and Cree Indians who occupy the Rocky Boys reservation that in my story, is
shared by the Blackfoot as well. Other historic facts are also 'adjusted'.
This is either due to story convenience or out of ignorance on my part to
what really happened 'in the past'. A glaring example that I'm embarrassed to
admit is my spelling of Jessie's name. It's the female form. Well... Jes is
two spirited where he lets men mount his butt as if he were a squaw. A rather
'convenient' explanation, huh? No. I just plain messed up so I've corrected
all the story texts to change the spelling to 'Jesse'.
Mike Yager is a 25 year old gay man who hales from Gary, Indiana. He's half
German from his father's side of the family and one eight Blackfoot Indian
from his mother's. While taking the first half of 2003 off from work to
vacation in Havre, Montana, in the hope of finding an Indian man to fall in
love with, he did. Jes-ee-ah is a 23 year old Blackfoot Native. The 'New to
Love' series of twenty story parts and the following 'New to Teaching Love'
series of 22 story parts give an account of how they met and many exciting
adventures admits their struggle to find acceptance for being gay while
helping others who share their spirit.
Mike's mother is named Linda who's a quarter Blackfoot. When marrying Michael
Yager, she no longer practiced being 'Traditional' by putting aside her proud
Indian heritage. She still remembers how to speak old Siksika learned from
her mother, Betsy With-a-big-voice. Betsy was the daughter of Shirt-for-man
and Christopher Walker. Chris is Mike's 'former self' who Merged with him.
That is, Christopher's spirit was reborn in Mike (a past life) so all of that
boy's life experiences and memories are now a part of Mike. He can recall
being a farmer's boy, and when coming to live with the Blackfoot of old,
Chris was Bad-eye's lover for nearly three years. He can speak old Siksika,
ride a horse, fight hand-to-hand, live off the land, etc. for having lived
amongst the People and being trained as an Indian brave before his death at
nearly eighteen years of age.
Jes-ee-ah is the son of Looks-from-mountain and Winnapah. Both are Siksika
Blackfoot. Winna's mother was the sister to He-who-runs-up-mountains, the
current shaman of the Blackfoot. Both Mike and Jesse fondly refer to this
old man as their grandfather. He'll be training Jes-ee-ah to become the
tribe's next shaman after him. This man's father was Meek-buffalo whose
father was Good-eyes, Jesse's former self (in a past life). That aged shaman
has not Merged with him. Yet all of Good-eyes memories are his to Delve into
though with effort. If they were to Merge, Jesse would lose his identify of
self from being overwhelmed by 'living' that old man's many life experiences.
Christopher Walker's parents had drowned while crossing a rain swollen river.
Mr. Telson, a fur trader found Chris washed up on sandbar and took him to
Fort Union. There the boy met brave Bad-eyes while he stood guard over his
father, Chief Ear-to-ground whose portrait was being painted by George
Catlin. This 'bare butt' brave fell in love with the white boy and whisked
him from the fort to live with him and his People. Their love grew. Chris
learned Blackfoot ways and was initiated a brave. He was called Krist-o-fer
or simply 'Kris'. Bad-eyes was fondly called 'Owopspec' (which means 'eyes')
by the boy. When blue-coats (U.S. soldiers from Fort Union) attacked the
Blackfoot tribe, Bad-eyes' father was amongst the first killed so he rallied
the other warriors to give women and children the time to flee to the caves
and though the battle turned out to be disastrous (they were outnumbered by
the soldiers and their superior weapons), he earned the status of warrior
himself and given the new name of Good-eyes.
During the nearly three years that Chris lived with the Blackfoot, he tried
gaining the People's acceptance as one of them. Some didn't trust this White
youth. It didn't help that he was living in Good-eyes' tipi as his boy lover
and the frequent attacks by blue-coats added to their mistrust. In an attempt
to ease their fears of where his loyalties lie, he married Shirt-for-man. His
lover, Owopspec had arranged this. In spite of the birth of a daughter, Chris
never gained acceptance by the People. At nearly the age of eighteen, he was
murdered by Trickster Eli Kie. Chief Good-eyes sought his lover's murderer
but didn't know which of his People had done this. He no longer performed his
medicine rite song put into his braves to protect them from being killed by
the soldier's bullets. Many fell in battle. Good-eyes turned his frustration
and woe towards fighting blue-coats with such suicidal zeal that it earned
him many eagle's feathers. He became a chief. The tribe moved north into the
Grandmother Country (Canada) to escape the blue-coats' increasing attacks.
There, Good-eyes married a woman who healed his broken heart. A son named
Hope-in-sunrise resulted from their union (manhood name: Meek-buffalo).
After being chief for many years, Good-eyes pursued a spiritual path and
became shaman. He discovered that his son, Meek-buffalo was attracted to men
like himself in spite of taking a woman to wife who bore his son they named
Looks-up-at-the-stars. (This boy became Shaman He-who-runs-up-mountains who
is Jesse's grandfather.)
Good-eyes sought a vision to help his son Meek-buffalo accept himself for
being gay. He crafted a Power Bundle: the Nahtoya Ponokah Nah-tos Kits tah kee
(elk skin bound mystery-man's medicine sacrifice). Its completion required
the shaman to offer his life for it. His son, Meek-buffalo carried out his
father's last wishes to be buried deep in a cave with the Power Bundle held
in his arms, awaiting a time when a truth could be brought to the People.
The 'New to Love' series accounts Mike and Jesse finding this Power Bundle
and grandfather Passing the spirit borne in it into them. They are Geased to
carry on shaman Good-eyes quest: to bring those who shared their spirit of
being gay into the Light and find acceptance by the People. The Darkness uses
wretched boys in denial of their gay selves to become an evil servant, the
Trickster. Eli Kie had succumbed to this fate. Raping Christopher and
murdering him in 1861 had served as an initiation to become a Trickster. He
was granted Power to do Evil and unnatural long life. When the Power Bundle
this man lusted for was found in Mike's trailer, he did battle with Jesse
but failed to steal it from him.
That spirit from Shaman Good-eyes' Power Bundle Passed into Mike and Jesse.
Shaman He-who-runs-up-mountains performed that rite for them. Powers are
granted the couple. For Mike, he can Glean people. It's like Looking into a
person's heart for who they are and what they've done. He is also in a kind
of telepathic contact with his soul mate, Jesse. They can Send thoughts and
feelings to each other even at a distance. Mike's Merging with Christopher
had come about after the Power Bundle's spirit Passing ritual. It had made
Mike sensitive to his past life. Mike 'lived' his former self's memories and
experiences that include knowing how to speak old Siksika. From his Connection
with Jesse, he can also speak the modern form.
'Short Hair' is the name fondly given to Mike by his lover. Jes recognizes
that his companion is no longer who he was as just 'Mike' but a Merged being
from Christopher. This naming refers to both of them who together are
following the good red road of becoming a better human being.
Jesse was born with the ability to Look inside people through touch. He
could sometimes read surface thoughts and know what a person is feeling. The
Power Bundle's spirit inside him has heightened this natural ability. Though
touch is usually still required, Jes can know a person's thoughts, Feel
their strong emotions but also read their memories. His Connection with Mike
allows them to exchange thoughts and feelings at a distance. But unlike Mike,
Jesse can Pull memories from his lover along with his strength. That is,
energy to restore his life-force when sick or to combat Evil. There is
another aspect of the lover's Connection to each other. Jes suffers from
autism. That's a mental condition where he often hid in himself because of
too much outside stimulus. The 'noise' from hearing and seeing and feeling
everything around him was overwhelming. Mike is filtering that out so Jes can
be normal. Before their special bond came about, it was through Mike's love
that he drew Jesse out from where he hid inside himself.
When there was a danger of Jesse's former self trying to force a Merging
with him, the couple met with Shaman Charms A Bird of the Omaha for help. He
was himself a Merge being though not with a former self (past life) but four
willing boys who Passed through them Willow Bird's spirit and self. This
shaman struck a deal with Jesse's former self (Shaman Good-eyes) to take on
his quest to slay the evil Trickster, Eli Kie. Not because Good-eyes wanted
to avenge Christopher's murder but to thwart Eli Kie from carrying out his
Dark Master's plan of bring about an end to the world. Shaman Charms A Bird
will do battle with Eli Kie in the sacred grove in California on that
moonless night to come (middle of May 2003).
During the couple's overnight stay with Shaman Charms A Bird in his motel
room, Jesse was initiated the next Leader of the Mahyee-na unbeknownst to
Mike. His memory was obscured until a time when all would be revealed to him.
That includes his own initiation into the Mahyee-na, a secret society of gay
loving men. Charms A Bird expects that his encounter with Trickster Eli Kie
will result in his death (a worthy sacrifice after living through five lives)
since the Darkness will lose an evil servant in exchange. The silver ring
Charms A Bird wears shall also go to Jesse's nextself after his death. It
hosts a spirit more powerful than the Power Bundle's. Another ritual was
granted Mike and Jesse: to protect them from sickness. Mike is aware of
this gift from Charms A Bird. They can have sex with other men without fear
of getting AIDS or other sexually transmitted diseases.
Mike and Jesse are a formidable force for truth when confronting someone.
For example, when Jeremy Two Ponies helped jump their pickup truck's dead
battery, he figured them out for being a gay couple and disapproved of it.
Jesse explained that what he felt for Mike was no different than how Jeremy
felt for his girlfriend. 'Love is between two people.' The Power within Mike
and Jes didn't force Jeremy into accepting them, only to open his heart to
this truth and he did.
Shaman Good-eyes had sacrificed his life to borne the Power bundle he crafted
with a spirit. This spirit now resides in both Mike and Jesse as their child.
They are Geased to fulfill that shaman's quest to bring a truth to the People:
that those who are gay are no different than others when it comes to being in
love with someone of their own sex. That's simply being human. Blessed with
Gifts of the Father, Mike and Jesse will spread this truth amongst the
People so others who share their spirit will find acceptance and love.
'NEW TO LOVE' 20 story parts (written 12/02 - 8/04) 1st series
(Story time: April 4, 2003 to April 26th)
This first series turned out much differently than I'd originally intended.
Mike and Jesse didn't remain 'normal' in that I've given them Powers and
thrust them into the realm of 'Indian magic'. I'd wanted the stories to
focus on their struggle to be together as gay lovers. I suspect that
'enhancement' came about from me being a Dungeon Master of the 'Advanced
Dungeons and Dragons' role playing game in the 1980's that was filled with
magic in a setting of Good versus Evil. From Mike's special bond with his
Indian lover, Jesse's autism was overcome that otherwise would not have
happened without magic. In this respect, I don't regret using the premise of
the Power Bundle's spirit Passing into this couple which has set this saga on
a supernatural and spiritual footing.
Being gay and Out in 2003 still proves a challenge for this couple in love.
Winna had to be convinced that her son was gay, had come into his manhood and
able to make decisions for himself without being tied to his mother's apron
strings. Mike hasn't completely won this woman over. Yet through his honesty,
sincerity and truly being in love with Winna's son that has resulted in
Mike's sacrifices while giving Jesse a chance to fulfill his role as the
tribe's next shaman, she is becoming more accepting of their relationship.
Mike too has grown as a person. Not only by Drawing on his former self's
memories and life experiences from Christopher, he is trying to follow the
good red road. Anger management and always worrying about his future is a
thing Mike needs to work on. He's learning that the act of sex can be the
means to express heartfelt love for other men. Running Water is helping him
to understand this concept.
While Mike and Jesse have Joined that walk through life together, they will
share the joy and beautiful mystery that love is with others such as Simon.
They aren't yet experienced enough (even while Drawing on their former selves)
to teach others but through their mistakes and learning from others the many
aspects of love, their own relationship will grow and become stronger. Mike
comes from a strict Christian upbringing that has taught him a value system
that differs from other points of view. 'Sex should only be done to express
love for that one person in your life.' Jesse was shown the acts of love by
Running Water's lover, Ron Earlman. That man fulfilled Jesse's physical and
emotional need to be gay by offering himself to the fulfillment of others.
'Sex is a simple bodily function like pissing.' Yet Jes has come to learn
that sexuality can express the love in one's heart whether for a lover, a man
in need (such as Ron) and to teach a boy (Simon) that it's alright to be gay.
What a clash of idealisms for this new couple!
Trust, understanding and faith, for instance, comes from life experiences
often learned the hard way. Mike's legal troubles represent one aspect of his
struggle to live in Jesse's world and what he's willing to sacrifice to
protect and be with his lover. It's sure made for an interesting story plot!
Then there's the 'Indian magic'. As a computer programmer, Mike was guided by
logic and only believed in what he could see with his own eyes. Ron's ghost
sure rattled Mike! His Connection with Jesse that is Mind Speaking, Feeling
each other's emotions, Drawing on each other's strengths and skills, and
their growing spiritual bond has proven to Mike that there are magical things
in this world. Jes and him are reborn spirits. As Bad-eyes, a Blackfoot brave
and the white youth, Christopher Walker who had fallen in love, all that
those two persons were are retained in Jesse and Mike who've fallen in love
again in their second chance at life.
'NEW TO TEACHING LOVE' 22 story parts (written 9/04 - present) 2nd series
(Story time: April 26, 2003 to May 12th)
Mike's place in Winna's home is solidified. He's taken a good portion of his
savings to pay off the woman's mortgage after her husband 'took' half the
money out of their home illegally. He's sleeping with Jes in his bedroom.
Mike's legal woes come to a head at the end of this series. He will soon be
released from this trouble after having gone through a trial by fire.
Jake is slowly accepting his fate. He'll be leaving his school and the only
life he's known these past eleven years to come live with his Aunt Winna in
Havre, Montana. His cousin Jesse helps him through this transition. Yet even
he can't Reach this troubled youth who doesn't believe he's gay. Grandfather
(shaman of the Blackfoot) will help the boy accept where his spirit leads him
and they'll grow very close.
In part 19 NtTL: Winna, M&J enjoy a picnic with Jake. Talk between them about
the boy's dead mother, etc. With Mike and Jes, Jake reveals his 'friendship'
with Dr. Karl who's been acting as Big Brother to him these past two years
that turned sexual. Karl paid Jake for this and it explains where the boy got
his laptop, expensive clothes and pocket money from. Jake won't admit that
he's enjoyed the sex or has loving feelings for this man. By the time Jake
leaves his school on Sunday, he'll realize this truth himself and it'll be a
real heart break when man and boy separate. They'll continue to keep in
contact by email and phone calls. Eventually, Karl may divorce his wife and
come up to Havre to be with Jake.
While Jesse shows Jake how to Indian wrestle on their picnic, Jesse becomes
faint with his heart pounding hard and he's out of breath. That concerns Mike
who suggests that Jes see a doctor about it. What they don't know is that the
walls to Jesse's heart are filling with fluid due to complications from
Marfan's Syndrome. The stress from being Connected to Mike psychically and
emotionally are taking its toll. In the third series, this becomes more
apparent. Terminal in the fourth series.
Parts 20-22 NtTL: (Sunday morning) Winna, M&J and Jake attend Church service
at the Jesuit school. Final goodbyes. Jake packs. The ten computer donations
fill Mike's pickup truck and he starts heading home. Dr. Karl drives Winna,
Jes & Jake to an Amtrak station in St. Paul-Minneapolis, Minnesota. Last hug
between Karl and Jake. This train will take Winna, Jes & Jake back to Havre,
MT. in time for them to attend Mike's court session Monday morning.
Mike drives home alone. Jesse helps keep him awake during the long night
through mind talk. Snatches of conversation Jes has with Jake are given to
Mike. The cousins are getting to know each other better.
While 'resting his eyes' very early Monday morning on the side of the
highway, a traffic cop cites Mike for illegal parking. He learns that this is
THE Mike Yager who assaulted a fellow officer (Lt. Scott Danielson) who was
murdered in his hospital bed. Officer Chevron makes trouble for Mike by
ensuring that he'll be late for his 10am court session. The officer claims
that Mike is under suspicion of driving a stolen vehicle (pickup truck is
registered in Winna's husband's name) and that load of ten computers in back
may be stolen as well.
After delaying Mike on the road for two hours, Officer Chevron is ordered by
his captain to escort Mike to the Havre courthouse. They make a stop at the
Chinook Community Center first so Mike can unload those ten computers with
Running Water's help. A confrontation with that highway patrol officer
ensues. Chinook Officer Hawk-swooping-down saves the day. Running Water
drives Mike to court where he meets his new attorney, Mr. James but he can't
accept that man's help since he's only using Mike for political reasons.
The judge is obviously upset that Mike is late for court. His traffic ticket
is shown her (time of interdiction left blank which Officer Chevron was going
to fill in a later time after delaying Mike as long as he dared). This event
yet again proves the hostility by the police department towards Mike so he
should be granted a civil rights violation Hearing. It seems that the D.A.'s
leading prosecutor Mr. Benton is in big trouble himself. A court clerk has
admitted to altering the original arrest/search warrant against Mike to
include the shaman's home residence that was not so ordered by the judge. Mr.
Benton had blackmailed this court clerk to perform the computer 'correction'
in a cover-up when five Havre Police officers had invaded the shaman's
residence illegally in their search for Mike.
Mike tells the judge that he can't accept Mr. James as his attorney. The
judged grants defense motions for more time so Mike can find a new attorney
to replace Mr. Talbert (due to failing health from cancer) and she grants
Mike a civil rights violation Hearing. While Mike was down in South Dakota,
events in Havre have uncovered the criminal misconduct of Prosecutor Benton
and interim Police Chief John Danielson who is forced to step down. Captain
Bill Ruston is restored as the Havre Police Chief.
Mr. Talbert informs Mike after the Hearing of these events. He has decided
not to represent Mike because of his unwillingness to provide him with
necessary information he thinks he needs to defend him such as what Ron's
diary says that prosecutions will use as evidence in court.
Mike is driven home after court and sleeps on the couch with Jesse for a few
hours. He's exhausted from having driven up from South Dakota and the ensuing
events. Most heavily on his mind is that his legal troubles seem to drag on
without an end in sight. He's never given any peace from his troubles when
all he wants to do is enjoy some alone time with Jesse.
Running Water is driving grandfather over to Winna's house to meet Jake that
evening over dinner. M&J take a bath together then talk with Jake while Winna
is cooking.
Grandfather gifts his grandson Jake a necklace and welcomes him into the
Blackfoot family. A drum his handed the teen to beat on while the shaman
tells him of the old Glory Days of the Blackfoot. Then the old man sings a
silly song he'd sung in his youth to earn pennies on street corners from
sympathetic Whites. He'd escaped White man's school and had been traveling
with a half Blackfoot woman to rejoin their People on the Montana res. near
Browning. It's a very sad song grandfather sings. At its end, Jesse sings
about hope. It is at that moment grandfather realizes that Mike and Jesse
sitting before him were THAT very couple who'd helped him out of Darkness
back in 1891! He cannot reveal this to M&J but Shows them images of his
troubled boyhood. He suggests that M&J go on their honeymoon tomorrow and
return on Friday. They agree.
'NEW TO LOVE HONEYMOON' (written 7/05 - present) 3rd series
(Story time: May 13, 2003 to May 14th / August 12, 1891 to November)
Story Premise:
Instead of a nice three day outing on the plains, Mike and Jesse are brought
Back in time to 1891. There are things this couple needs to achieve that had
shaped their own time in 2003. The circle will be completed.
That Tuesday morning, M&J awaken in bed. Their loving making is interupted
by a phone call from Mr. Talbert. That upsets Mike because in the sanctuary
of their own bedroom, troubles find them. Jes reminds Mike that they'll be
getting away from all that by going on their honeymoon today.
The eat breakfast with Jake, assuring the teen that he'll be alright alone
with Winna for the next three days while they're away. Jake has watched T.V.
to know the legal troubles Mike has been going through so he doesn't begrudge
them a honeymoon.
Mike and Jesse drive to One-white-horse's cabin outside of Chinook Tuesday
morning. Grandfather has them dress into oldish clothes (overalls for Mike
and breechclout flaps for Jesse). One-white-horse has readied a horse and
provisions for them to enjoy a three day outing in the plains. Grandfather
performs a farewell ceremony that includes a rite his grandson must invoke
when 'snow in on the ground'. Jes doesn't have a clue as to what that's all
about. M&J ride to Buffalo Watch Hill.
They enjoy one day of their honeymoon together. Early Wednesday morning, the
couple are brought Back in time to the year 1891 by Fireball Spirits. Their
first hint of this comes from seeing the 'crop circles' spiraling around
them. Havre, Montana is now called 'Bull Hook Bottoms' and it's a real cowboy
town. Mike and Jes realize that they've been brought Back to help grandfather
(as a boy) out of Darkness so he can in turn help the People in his role as
shaman in the future. Their interaction with other people of this time shapes
future events.
I plan to write twenty story parts for this third series. It tells of M&J's
adventures back in 1891 where they leave Bull Hook Bottoms (Havre) and ride
west to the Blackfoot Reservation to find grandfather when he was a boy. They
are accosted by a thief in the night, as Seen by Mike as a strong memory when
they'd nearly been shot by Roy guarding over his marijuana plants in 2003.
Jesse is forced to kill this thief and his necessary act puts a black stain
on his soul only a shaman can cleanse. Mike gets him to Browning. They meet
with the tribe's shaman who can help Jes.
As a white skin, Mike's presence on the reservation is not easily accepted by
the Blackfoot. Dreams Often gives Mike a lot of woe coming from his intense
hatred for White skins (he'd been raped by some cowboys). The People are
barely scraping by as farmers and raising cattle. The Whites who covet their
land 'given them' by the U.S. Government harass them, burn crops, buildings,
drive off cattle and murder their People in the hope of driving the Indians
away or force them to sell their land.
Native children have been sent off to White man's school to be 'educated'.
Only the very young or those who've gone to school (and returned) remain on
the reservation. The old folks remember the People's ways but they are
shunned by the younger generation who struggle to survive as farmers and
ranchers. This is a tragic period for the Blackfoot who are losing their
identity as the People of Old.
Jesse is tended to by the shaman. He's physically ailing from that long ride
by horse and his spirit stained for having killed that thief in the night.
Mike waits until he's healed. He tries to befriend tribesmen but they are
very suspicious and angered by his presence on the reservation.
M&J are offered Bessie's lodge to sleep in. This half breed woman is an
outcast by her tribe since she's prostituted herself in White towns when
traveling from her Canadian tribe to reach the Blackfoot Res. in Montana. A
boy was found along the way named Looks-up-at-the-stars. When this youth
learned that both his parents had died upon arrival, he fell into a deep dark
depression. Bessie has been taking care of him. She doesn't like having two
strangers (M&J) staying in her lodge (the shaman asked her to do this thing)
but she eventually warms up to them. On their first night in Bessie's lodge,
M&J realize that the troubled youth this squaw is taking care of is their
grandfather! He's muttered that silly song Jesse recognized when as an old
man, had sung in Winna's front room for Jake. Mike notices how the boy keeps
rubbing his fingers together (Bessie explains that was his gesture for
pennies to be given him from the White skins in town when he sung for them)
so Mike gives this boy that silver 1891 quarter grandfather had given him at
One-white-horse's cabin to rub instead. A hole in this coin's date is thonged
by Jesse so the boy can wear it around his neck so he won't lose this lucky
token. When M&J return to 2003, grandfather will show them a knotted thong
they recognize as having held that quarter around his neck as a boy.
To prevent changing the future, M&J are careful about revealing where they've
come 'from'. Mike goes by the name Michael Walker. (I haven't come up with an
assumed name for Jesse yet.) The tribe's shaman is told that M&J had been
Brought Forward by Fireball Spirits from that time of their former selves;
not that they've really been Brought Back from the year 2003. This shaman
is told that their reason for coming is to help bring Bessie's adopted son
out of his depression so he can help the People as a future shaman.
Jesse undergoes shaman training while Mike does what he can to help the
People. He works in the fields along side them (Christopher was a farmer's
boy so that knowledge comes in handy) and he is also put to work with their
cattle but Dreams Often who's hostile towards Mike at first eventually comes
to accept that he's gay with M&J's help. Mike falls in love with this man
with feelings even stronger than for Running Water and maybe even how he
feels for Jesse!
The money grandfather had given them in gold coins (changed into paper money
in Bull Hook Bottoms) is used by Mike to purchase much needed supplies to
help the People through the coming winter.
M&J participate in the People's Sun Dance. Their sacred suffering along side
the other men marks the beginning of acceptance of them by the People. Jes
is given honorable scars above both his tits when ripping out the thonged
bone holding him to the center pole. Mike had turned to his lover when
hearing his painful outcries so his thonged bone ripped from above his right
tit. He fainted from the pain before ripping out that bone from above his
left tit. The significants to Mike bearing only one scar is that it mirrors
his role in the Blackfoot Tribe (past and present): one foot stands in pride
for the People while his other foot (no tit scar) stands in pride as a White.
There's an incident where cattle kept by the Blackfoot are being killed by
White ranchers who hope to drive the Indians off their land. A Native boy
tending his herd is shot dead. Mike, Jesse and Dreams Often (who Mike loves)
hunt these bad men down. It ends in a gunfight where Mike and Dreams Often
are pinned down while Jes circles around, guided by mind speaking with Mike.
When Mike feigns being shot with outcries, that draws the three cattlemen's
attention forward while Jesse sneaks up from behind and kills two with his
knife. A struggle ensues with the third man where his rifle goes off, missing
Jes. Mike had been running and he shoots this last man dead. Their bodies and
gear are dragged off and hidden but their three horses are taken back to the
tribe and given to that dead boy's parents and two other families who recently
lost loved ones to those evil men.
While Jesse is undergoing training as shaman, he is told that though his
spirit is strong and he has been blessed with Power from the Father, his body
is too weak for him to complete the training. Jesse will not become shaman!
Not revealed in this series (though clues are given) is that the walls of
Jesse's heart are filling with fluid coming from the complications of him
suffering from Marfan's Syndrome. Stress from being Connected to Mike and
what they've endured psychically has also taken its toll. There is no cure
for this in 1891 and when returning to their own time in 2003, Jesse's
critical condition will not be discovered until after... Well. You'll read
about it in the fourth series' summary.
Willow Bird's third nextself, Many Arrows In Hand is 'captured' by the angry
Blackfoot for trespassing on their reservation. Mike saves this enemy Omaha
man from them, learning who he is and why he has come to Browning looking
for a 'White man with his Native male lover'. That metal knife Jes took from
Christopher's burial cave at Buffalo Watch Hill is needed by this shaman. It
contains the Evil resonance from Eli Kie when he murdered Krist-o-fer with
this blade, thus it can be used to track this Trickster down by pointing the
way. Sadly, their battle with Trickster Eli Kie in this time fails to slay
him yet Shaman Charms A Bird can use this blade to help him find Eli Kie
again in 2003 and make a final battle together with Mike and Jesse's help.
Here's a timeline of the 1800's where I've placed important events:
1820 Willow Bird of the Kalinlepi Tribe of Omaha born.
1836 At age 15, Willow Bird Passes himself into the 8 year old boy,
Running Wolf.
1841 Pah-kaps-owopspec born. No childhood name ever given but he's
called Bad-eyes as a brave and Good-eyes as chief and then shaman.
1843 Christopher Walker born.
1850 Ending of Blackfoot way of life as it was of old in the U.S.
1855 Lame Bull's treaty signed with U.S. defining Blackfoot boundaries.
1858 Chris meets Owopspec at ages 15/17 respectfully.
1859 Running Wolf gives Chris an 'Arrow of Power' to be put inside Owopspec.
1860 White settlers enter Blackfoot country.
1861 Betsy With-a-big-voice born to Chris and Shirt-for-man.
1861 Chris is murdered by brave Eli Kie whose initiation as a Trickster
to serve Evil is completed.
1863 Chief Good-eyes marries. New life in Canada for his People.
1864 Hope-in-sunrise born to Chief Good-eyes.
1865 Fighting breaks out between Blackfoot and White settlers.
1870 Massacre on Marias River. 200 Blackfoot killed. 140 women and children
captured. The Blackfoot never face U.S. army again.
1872 First school for Blackfoot children opened at Teton River Agency.
1873 At age 45, Running Wolf Passes himself into the 6 year old boy,
Many Arrows In Hand.
1874 The boy Hope-in-sunrise attains his manhood name of Meek-buffalo.
1877 Chief Crowfoot signs treaty with U.S. Government.
1878 Looks-up-at-the-stars is born to Meek-buffalo. When becoming a man,
he'll be called He-who-runs-up-mountains who is Jesse's grandfather.
1878 Prairie fires destroy grasslands in western Canada, driving buffalo
herds south into Montana never to return. This marks the beginning of
the end to Canadian branch of Siksika Blackfoot who start migrating
south and are forced onto reservations.
1879 Fort Assinniboine established (6 miles SW of what will be known as
Havre). Mike had toured this fort with his parents in 2003.
1883-84 Starvation winter and spring. Buffalo herds in Montana disappear.
600 Blackfoot starve. The survivors now depend on U.S. Gov. rations.
1886 At age 8, Looks-up-at-the-stars attends a Jesuit school for Native
children. His parents were forced to give him up when much needed
food and supplies were being withheld from them by the U.S.
Government. The boy is given the White name of Jacob at school.
1887 Four months later, 'Jacob' escapes the Jesuit school and heads to the
Blackfoot Reservation in Browning. Along his travels, he meets up with
a half breed woman calling herself Bessie. Together, they slowly make
their way south from Canada earning money through prostitution (the
woman) while the boy sings for coppers on street corners.
1888 Railroad reaches Fort Assinniboine.
1889 Looks-up-at-the-stars at age 11 reaches the Blackfoot Reservation with
Bessie. To the boy's horror, he learns that his father had been killed
by Whites when trying to steal food; his mother died shortly after from
starvation. The boy falls into a deep dark depression.
1891 Railroad reaches Bull Hook Bottoms (Havre) early in the year. This
town becomes an important trade center for the area.
1891 Mike and Jesse are brought Back to this time by Fireball Spirits when
enjoying a honeymoon in the Montana plains. They come to stay with
Bessie and her adopted 13 year old son, Looks-up-at-the-stars. Mike
and Jesse meet Shaman Many Arrows In Hand who is 24.
1892 Chief Gazes-up-at-the-mountain's holy words are transcribed onto a
scroll that later comes into Mr. Talbert's collection.
1893 Havre incorporated. Farmers, ranchers, businessmen, railroaders,
teachers and preachers live in this town and surrounding area.
1895 Blackfoot Nation sells what is today Glacier National Park to the
U.S. Government for mineral exploration.
1931 Betsy With-a-big-voice and Looks-up-at-the-stars are Dropped in this
time along with Shaman Many Arrows In Hand by Fireball Spirits. Mike
and Jesse are taken Forward to their own time in 2003.
1947 At age 40, Many Arrows In Hand Passes himself into the 8 year old boy,
Runs-through-grass.
1952 Linda Shore (Mike's mother) born to Betsy With-a-big-voice.
1977 Mike Yager born.
1979 Jes-ee-ah born to Winnapah and Looks-from-mountain.
1997 At age 58, Runs-through-grass Passes himself into the 16 year old teen,
Charms A Bird. He is Willow Bird's final nextself.
2003 Mike and Jesse meet (April 7th).
After many adventures for M&J in 1891, the first snows come in November. They
say their goodbyes to tribesmen. It's an especially difficult farewell for
Mike and Dreams Often since they'd fallen madly in love. Looks-up-at-the-stars
and Bessie (who's been taking care of him and will continue to do so) are
told that they are to be Brought forward in time. It's then that Mike learns
that Bessie is actually Betsy With-a-big-voice, his mother's mother whom he'd
never met! It's an agonizing moment for Mike since he can't reveal that he'll
be her grandson.
Looks-up-at-the-stars, Betsy and Shaman Many Arrows In Hand are dropped off
in the year 1931 when times are better for the Blackfoot People. M&J are
brought Forward to May 14, 2003 at the exact moment that early Wednesday
morning when they'd been taken Back in time by Fireball Spirits. Well.
Actually, Mike is brought Forward a week to help Shaman Charms A Bird do
battle with Eli Kie on that moonless night. It is by Mike's hand wielding
that very blade his former self had been murdered with that he'll slay that
evil Trickster. He's returned by the Fire Spirits to May 14th where Jesse
didn't notice Mike's 'few seconds' of absence. I'll account this battle in
the story: "The Hand That Wields The Blade".
The following events were shaped by M&J's presence in 1891:
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
Tom Little Blanket became a legalist to help his Cree People negotiate
treaties, disputes and reservation boundaries with the U.S. Government. This
came about because Mrs. Carter (May's Bookshop) tutored the boy whom Mike
paid for his private lessons and purchased a good set of clothes for him. Tom
had been working at the Brahman's Livery as a stable hand and servicing lonely
men who boarded there at night when he met M&J. The boy massaged medicine
into Jesse's hurting muscles from riding a horse, made suggestions as to the
supplies Mike would need on their journey to the Blackfoot Res. along with
giving him useful tips. Mike wanted to free this youth from his plight.
He-who-runs-up-mountains became shaman of the Blackfoot who helps Mike and
Jesse as their 'grandfather'. As a young teen (Looks-up-at-the-stars), he
was brought out of his deep depression (caused by the death of his parents)
by Jesse and brought Forward by Fireball Spirits to a better time for the
Blackfoot in 1931.
Betsy With-a-big-voice was Mike's maternal grandmother. As 'Bessie' in 1891,
she begrudgedly allowed Mike and Jesse to stay in her lodge where she was
raising her adopted son Looks-up-at-the-stars whom Jesse helped. Mike showed
this woman that not all white skins are bad hearted during his three month
stay with her. After she was brought Forward to 1931 (to take care of her
'son' Looks-up-at-the-stars), she married Thomas Shore, a white man, whose
daughter Linda became Mike's mother.
The Blackfoot survived the winter of 1891 when Mike purchased much needed
food supplies for them. $800 in gold coins had been given to Mike and Jes by
grandfather when they departed on their honeymoon. Mike converted it into
paper money (for easy carrying) with some spent on warm clothes, a rifle,
food, and equipment when they rode west to the Blackfoot Reservation. Money
was given to Bessie when she and her adopted son were dropped in 1931 to
begin new lives.
Mr. Talbert, esq. helps modern Native Peoples (Blackfoot, Chippewa and Cree)
through his legal services as an attorney because his grandfather, Mr. Falk
had started that family 'tradition'. Mike met Mr. Falk in Bull Hook Bottoms
in 1891 and made this man aware that Indians needed help to protect their
rights and lands 'given them' by the U.S. Government. They exchanged letters
when Mike mailed his plea for help on behalf of the Blackfoot to Mr. Falk.
His response letter was later gifted to Mr. Talbert by Mike in 2003 when he
realized those men were related when seeing how both of them possess the same
gold pocket watch that played a familiar musical tune.
In 1895, the Blackfoot Nation sold what is today Glacier National Park to
the U.S. Government for mineral exploration. Mr. Falk had helped negotiate
this treaty to the Blackfoot's benefit where otherwise the U.S. would have
'taken it back' from them without a proper settlement of money. To this day,
a stipend is paid to Blackfoot tribal members.
The American people eventually became aware of Native culture, spirituality,
and their oneness with nature by attending Powwows, seeing them in paintings
and photos, reading their accounts in books by historians, etc. in part
because Mike had asked the Chiefs of the Blackfoot in 1891 to allow White
people to witness their beautiful and sacred ceremonies as he had when living
amongst them for three months.
Shaman Charms A Bird will do final battle with Trickster Eli Kie in May 2003.
He'll be able to track this evil man down in the sacred grove in California
because a blade containing Eli Kie's psychic resonance will point the way.
In 1861, Brave Eli Kie had raped and murdered Christopher (Mike's former self)
using this metal blade. Owopspec had gifted this knife to his White boy lover
so it was buried with Kris in an earthen cave under Buffalo Watch Hill. While
on their honeymoon in 2003, Jesse removed this blade from Christopher's
grave much to Mike's horror. When they're brought Back to 1891, this blade
was given to Shaman Many Arrows In Hand (Charms A Bird's former nextself) who
does battle with Eli Kie but failed to slay this evil Trickster. That blade
was passed through each nextself as a kind of 'holy weapon' until it comes
into Charms A Bird's hand. Yet it's not by his hand that Trickster Eli Kie
will meet his death. Mike's unexpected arrival in California by Fireball
Spirits wasn't Foreseen by that shaman yet his help welcomed. Together,
Charms A Bird and Mike do battle in the sacred wood (set ablaze by Eli Kie)
with that blade leading them to the final confrontation between Good and
Evil. Charms A Bird uses his Power to weaken the Trickster's shields (pulling
on Jesse's life force as he sits beside Mike in Winna's backyard while Jake
attends them beating on a drum) so the time forward brought Mike at his side
can slip the blade through and slay Trickster Eli Kie. Charms A Bird dies. As
the forest fire is about to close in on the time forward brought Mike,
Fireball Spirits whisk him back a week to May 14th to Jesse's side before
that battle took place. Mike's memories of what (will) happened are obscured.
Jesse notices burnt wood smoke in Mike's clothes and his singed hair. He
thinks that came from their rough ride Forward to 2003 by Fireball Spirits.
While story parts are being written for this 3rd series, I'll also write
parts to the 4th series whose summary now follows.
'NEW TO LOVE AGAIN' (yet to be written) 4th series
(Story time: May 14, 2003 to ?)
Having just been Returned to 2003 early Wednesday morning, Mike and Jes ride
to a farm house outside of Browning. A Native man answers the door who isn't
surprised to see them. Grandfather had forewarned this tribesman to be on the
look out for his grandsons returning from their 'journey' in the plains. M&J
sleep until the afternoon. This Native man drives them and their horse back
to Chinook. Grandfather greets his grandsons returning from their long
'honeymoon'. Debriefing of their three month long adventures in 1891.
Grandfather shows them the knotted thong which had held that silver quarter
given him by Mike when he was that troubled youth of thirteen Jes and him
helped out of darkness. The circle is completed.
It is a strange return for M&J to modern conveniences: running tap water,
indoor toilet, food in the fridge, electricity and lights. They roam Winna's
house as if only half remembering where they'd lived together. Bessie's lodge
had been their home for them three months in 1891.
Bend-in-the-wind and Timothy Fast-are-his-feet from MAITS (Montana American
Indian Two-Spirits) organization of gay Natives (Chippewa and Cree) visit
with Mike and Jesse at the house on Friday asking them to join. A gay nudist
meet takes place the next day on Saturday, May 17th that they attend. Lots of
sex for M&J which had been Foreseen by Jes (NtTL part 13).
Mike's legal woes end when the D.A.'s office announces that their charge of
'Attempted murder of a police officer' against Mike is dropped. All evidence
in that case is sealed (Ron Earlman's diary won't ever be made public so no
one will know that Ron was having sex with Jesse which was what Mike feared
most about coming out at his trial). The People celebrate at a BBQ held in
Mike's honor in Browning on Sunday, May 18th. It is at this meeting M&J
discover that Brian Bow-branch-that-doesn't-break was the boy Trickster Eli
Kie had subverted through false love. Grandfather asks Elder Tends-the-horses
(Brian is his grandson) to cleanse this youth of Evil's taint. M&J will help
this boy deal with being gay and his betrayal by Eli Kie. The boy will give
them leads into the identity of Eli Kie's 'Trickster in training' who had
cast an Evil spell over Jes that made him and Simon sick at the protest in
front of the Havre Police station weeks earlier.
Mr. Talbert is gifted with an Indian craft, weapon or some such thing that
Mike had been given in 1891 by the Blackfoot. He also gifts his attorney a
letter he'd received in 1891 as 'Michael Walker' from Mr. Falk, esq. who was
Mr. Talbert's grandfather! Mike translates an 1892 scroll in Mr. Talbert's
collection where Chief Gazes-up-at-the-mountain's holy words to the People
had been recorded. Mike had seen this chief with his own eyes and gives Mr.
Talbert a first-hand account much to this man's delight. He takes it to heart
and begins to understand the spirit of the People he's been helping in legal
matters for all these years.
A crisp 'new' 1891 dollar bill that Mike had kept in his journal from that
time is worth much more than the $800 in face-value worn gold coins
grandfather had given them on their honeymoon. Mike gives this valuable $1
bill note to the Blackfoot Council who use its sale proceeds to help poor
tribesmen in need.
Mike and Jesse's 'wedding' is to take place the following Saturday. Invites
were sent out weeks earlier to family and friends to attend. Sadly, this
happy bonding ceremony won't be taking place because Jesse is going to die.
What?! In the previous NtL series, hints were given that Jesse is not well.
He suffers from Marfan's Syndrome (it stretches the muscles of his body so
that's why he has unusually long arms and legs). More critically, the walls
of Jesse's heart were filling with fluid. That's why the shaman that Jesse
underwent training from in 1891 said that he won't become a shaman himself
because his body is too weak to endure that initiation rite or live long
enough to serve the People.
On that moonless night (sometime between May 19th, 2003 and May 23rd which
I've yet to determine), Jesse will Reach out to Shaman Charms A Bird to help
him do battle against Trickster Eli Kie. Mike is sitting there beside him in
Winna's backyard AND his time forward brought self will be at Charms A Bird's
side to thrust his blade in Eli Kie's throat. Jake attends M&J with a drum
he'll beat on. In this clash between Good and Evil to save the world from
destruction, Charms A Bird and Jesse succeed in killing Eli Kie but at a
terrible cost to themselves. Both will die. The silver ring comes to Jake who
assumes guardianship over this powerful object but not as its owner. As
Jesse's heart fails him due to the stress of Passing strength from Mike
through him to Charms A Bird, his spirit is about to take Flight. Mike was
given a mind burst from Charms A Bird a few weeks earlier that held a ritual
he can invoke to Catch Jesse's spirit inside himself so only his lover's body
'dies'. This same rite was what Willow Bird had performed to catch Smiles A
Lot's spirit into himself when his lover was about to die from wounds
suffered by Split Tribesmen who had tortured him. (Reading the 'Shaman Willow
Bird' series will provide you insight into this.)
Needless to say, Mike loses himself when Jesse 'dies'. It's what his mother
had been warned would happen to her son by her mother Betsy With-a-big-voice:
"Your son will lose himself to the Indians". Mike's parents had come to
Montana to attend his 'wedding' which now turns into a funeral for his lover.
Mike has lost it. He goes insane, acting like a crazed Indian (Jesse's
spirit that rages against not going Above) while at other times, Mike becomes
non-responsive. His parents take him back home to Indianapolis where he's put
in a psychiatric hospital. A month later, Mike returns to himself. The
doctors treating him noticed a very unusual brain wave pattern, almost as if
there were two people in one head (Jesse!). Though Mike seems to have
recovered, the doctors want to keep him in the hospital for more 'tests'.
Mike manages to escape them.
Not quite believing that Jesse is really dead, Mike returns to Montana where
Running Water takes him to his lover's grave. The tombstone read:
| Jes-ee-ah, son of Looks-from-mountain and Winnapah |
| July 20, 1979 - May 23, 2003 |
| |
| "His Spirit Will Never Die." |
|____________________________________________________|
Yet Mike Feels that his lover is close... Inside him still! Running Water
takes Mike to Winna's house where you can imagine how much crying the two
have in grieving together. Jesse had given his mother a letter on the night
he died which refers to a letter he wrote Mike put in his 1891 journal hidden
in their bedroom. It offers Mike hope.
On the day after Jesse died, John Danielson publically announced his civil
suite brought against Mike to recover 'damages' (hospital bills, pain and
suffering, etc.) for brutally assaulting his brother Scott after the D.A.
had dropped their criminal charge. John had resigned from the police force
in protest. His lawsuit was ill timed since he didn't know that Jesse had
died the night before yet it still allows him get back at Mike for putting
his brother in the hospital where one of his Indian 'friends' murdered him.
Part of the 'evidence' John presents at his public announcement are copies of
an English translation to Ron Earlman's diary. Scott had taken this diary
from Winna's house where he was attacked by Mike outside in 'defense of his
homosexual Indian friend Jesse' whose secret Mike was trying to protect of
what Ron's diary had said about those two having sex together. John
Danielson's lawsuit will be dismissed by the judge but the harm is done. The
Blackfoot People and Winna now know what Ron Earlman had done with Jesse that
blackens Ron's good name in the tribe and shames Winna and Running Water.
Mike can't live in Winna's house so he rents a room to mourn his lover. He
realizes with regret that not a single photograph has been taken of him with
Jesse. Running Water says that no mere image could catch Jesse's spirit or
the love he had for Mike. That lives on in their memories. At that moment,
Mike realizes that more than his own memories live on - he holds Jesse's as
well and it explains why he's not accepted his lover's death. Grief over
Jesse's bodily death, yes, but not the real or final death. It explains why
Mike didn't follow Jes to the Above as grandfather warned him would happen.
All that his lover was still remains inside him. If only Mike knew how to
release it to free Jesse's spirit or... be reborn.
Jake asks about that silver ring he's wearing from a necklace around his neck.
It had come to him 'out of thin air' during that ritual when Jesse died.
Mike doesn't know what the boy should do with Charms A Bird's ring other
than to be its guardian for a while longer.
Grandfather Looks into Mike. He knows what Shaman Charms A Bird had prepared
him to do should Jesse die on that moonless night. Jesse's spirit is being
Held in Mike. But without a body to return to...
Mike hits his lowest point when Indian gang bangers beat him up and shoot up
his pickup truck. They don't want a gay White man molesting the Indian boys
and warn Mike to stay out of the res. or else face worst wrath from them.
The Darkness tempts Mike in his grief to become an evil servant: Trickster.
'All the Indian boys and men you've ever wanted to love will be yours!' He
claims that Jesse's spirit has Fallen to the Underworld, his realm of
suffering that is Jes-ee-ah's lot for slaying his servant, Eli Kie. Yet if
Mike accepts to become his evil servant, Jesse's spirit will be released
from torture to Fly Above. Mike resists the Darkness. He'll walk in the
Light alone and honor his dead lover's memory.
Mike decides to remain in Montana over his parent's objections. They want
their son to return to Indiana for treatment. No way! With Jake's help, those
ten computer donations are set up in a room at the Chinook Community Center
where Mike begins teaching computer classes to Blackfoot Tribesmen. In this
way, he honors his lover's memory by helping the People. Running Water
comforts Mike as he himself was comforted by him when mourning over Ron.
They've now both lost lovers.
Mike proves his good heart to the Blackfoot People by helping out those in
need on the reservation. Not by handing out money, but personally helping
them repair shacks and trailers, buying food for the needy, etc. He's wary
of being beaten up again or killed by those Indian gang bangers.
Mike is offered a final $60,00 payment by his software company, the Learning
Tree. In July, he was expecting just under $30,000 in Royalties to his three
software titles' sales from the first half of 2003. His company claimed that
since Mike's voice recognition coding modules were developed while drawing
salary in 2002, he wasn't deserved of continued Royalty payments. In dismay
(and after consulting with his manager Dianne by phone who provided him
'inside' information about her company's strategy and thought on this subject)
Mike hires an attorney in Indianapolis to contest their unfounded claims. He
had coded that voice recognition module on his own time and the company had
signed Royalty contracts with him but were now not acting in good faith.
Dianne had told him that the company recently signed contracts with some big
retail distributors to sell their educational software titles so his
Royalties were expected to be considerable in 2004 though it would be a
shorter sales life. It wasn't the money so much as feeling betrayed by a
company he'd given three years of his life to that prompts his legal action.
Other educational titles utilize his coding modules for which he wasn't
given any payment for.
One day, grandfather asks Mike to drive him to a hospital so he can attend to
a comatose Indian teen who'd been in a bad car accident a few months earlier.
Jake (guardian of Charms A Bird's powerful silver ring) comes with them. This
eighteen year old Blackfoot teen is named Teddy.
The prognosis isn't good. Ted's injuries have healed but the doctors believe
that he suffered severe brain damage so this teen won't likely come out of
his coma. Grandfather performs a ritual and Sees that Ted's spirit has
already flown Above; only his body remains alive through the 'miracle' of
modern medicine. From vision, grandfather had been guided to this teen's
bedside. He knows what needs to be done but lacks the skill for so
complicated a rite.
Jake somehow knows what must be done. That silver ring of Charms A Bird's is
placed on Ted's finger. It is of Power and has the ritual knowledge to aid
grandfather in Passing Jesse's held spirit inside of Mike into that
spiritless body of Ted's. This teen awakens from his coma much to the
surprise of his doctors.
Teddy becomes Jesse's nextself but sadly, only in spirit. Jesse's earthly
experiences aren't Open in this teen. Mike is devastated. He recalls that
Charms A Bird had warned him that this may prove to be so (NtTL part 18).
Elder Quiet-before-the-dawn secures legal custody of Ted who becomes a ward
of the Blackfoot Nation. His father had died in that car accident. His mother
had died giving birth to him. No known aunts or uncles. Ted had come from a
poor section of the Browning Blackfoot Reservation. Grandfather takes this
teen back to Chinook to live in his house during his rehabilitation, both in
mind and body. Ted is eighteen but he acts younger; innocent. His leg
muscles had atrophied when he was in a coma so he can't walk. Mike is asked
to help this teen regain the use of his legs through exercise and from his
encouragement. It's difficult for Mike knowing that Jesse's spirit is
within this teen since there's no recognition for him looking out from
Teddy's eyes for him.
Mike continues teaching his Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday computer classes
at the Chinook Community Center. Jake attends Fall classes in the 11th grade
during the week but after school, sometimes helps Mike with Ted and he also
assists his grandfather. The two have grown very close. Running Water
comforts Mike by renewing their loving relationship. He's often spending the
weekend nights with Mike in his bedroom at grandfather's house where he's
living now. Winna has Jake living with her during the school week. Ted knows
that something is going on between Mike and Running Water and longs for what
they have together for himself. He catches Mike naked wrestling with Jake one
afternoon. Seeing them having sex (Jake fucking Mike's ass) didn't shock him
but makes the teen realize that he is also gay.
Ted starts Feeling what Mike feels and he can pick up on Mike's thoughts when
touching him. Mike, in turn, Feels a growing Connection to Ted. All of Mike's
abilities to Glean people, speak Siksika, etc. had never been lost after
Jesse's 'death'. Mind speaking slowly develops between them. This offers
grandfather hope that his grandson Jes-ee-ah will return to himself (memories)
in the body of Ted and complete his training as the tribe's next shaman after
him before he dies.
Teddy is not told that he is Jesse's nextself. He's learned from Jake that
Mike had lost his lover a few months ago and is still mourning over him. Ted
waits patiently for Mike not to be so sad. They've become good friends. He's
envious of Running Water and Jake who make love to Mike where he longs to
be in this cute white guy's arms himself. Mike knows this but he just can't
bring himself to return Ted's love until Jesse's earthly experiences and
memories are Opened in him first.
One night, Teddy slips into Mike's bedroom. He embraces this white guy and
in Mike's dream, he is making love to Jesse as if he's never died. The joy
from their spiritual/physical love making Awakens Jes in Teddy; all his life
experiences and memories. The next morning, Mike awakens to find his lover
smiling beside him in bed.
As Willow Bird had Passed himself into those four boys, Jesse's nextself
truly becomes Teddy. He keeps this new name forsaking his own so people won't
know what's happened. Mike is both overjoyed at having Jesse returned to him
but he needs to get used to the idea that it has in Ted's body. Winna is told.
She too has to get used to the idea that her son Jes-ee-ah has been returned
to her. Mike and Teddy return to live in Winna's house as lovers.
'NEW TO LOVE SHAMAN' (yet to be written) 5th series
(Story time: ? to ?)
In this fifth series, Jesse's nextself as Teddy will complete his training
in shamanism from his grandfather in those few months before the old man dies.
In 1891, Jes had undergone a few months training from a Blackfoot shaman but
was told that his body was too weak to survive initiation or serve the People
long. In Ted's strong body, he will. His former self (shaman Good-eyes) can
be Delved into for wisdom and shaman knowledge as well.
Teddy becomes the Blackfoot Tribe's next Inspired One. Grandfather's vision
is finally fulfilled. But like many visions, it's not fully understood until
after it comes about. Here is Shaman Runs-up-the-mountain's vision:
'When the Flower Moon comes,
a boy of my choosing will blossom into manhood.
This new one will be filled from the Old.
He will walk forward with one foot firmly on our Mother
while his other foot rises on a moon beam.
His left hand pledged.
His right hand to serve the People.'
The Flower Moon was last May 2003 when grandfather had chosen Jes-ee-ah, a
'boy' at that time to be shaman after him who came into his manhood because
of Mike. This first part of the vision was already understood and fulfilled.
'This new one will be filled from the Old.' Grandfather and Mike had believed
that meant Jesse was 'filled' from his former self, Shaman Good-eyes BUT
they had not Merged! This line in grandfather's vision actually meant that
Teddy (This new one...) will be Jesse's nextself (...filled from the Old).
'He will walk forward with one foot firmly on our Mother...' meant that Ted's
strong body will live long beyond Jesse's body could of due to him suffering
from Marfan's Syndrome.
'...while his other foot rises on a moon beam.' This meant that Jes-ee-ah's
spirit can Walk where all the Others dwell in the Above which is an important
ability for a shaman Seeking visions and being One with the Father so he may
guide the People.
'His left hand pledged.' Already understood by grandfather, his chosen one's
left hand is held by Mike's in love. This proved to be true for Jesse and
then Teddy when 'new to love again' happened.
'His right hand to serve the People.' This final line in the vision is
finally fulfilled. Shaman He-who-runs-up-mountains had chosen his first born
son to be shaman after him but Evil rubbed him out in his early 20's. His
next Chosen was his son Hawk-in-sky's son who was also murdered, in boyhood.
Grandfather had despaired until given this vision where his other grandson,
Jes-ee-ah would become his last chance. Yet this young man also died before
he became shaman. When Teddy ('This new one...') was 'filled from the Old'
(Jes-ee-ah's spirit Opened with his earthly experiences and memories), he
fulfilled grandfather's vision by becoming the next shaman of the Blackfoot.
Charms A Bird's silver ring grants Teddy many powerful abilities. You have
only to read the 'Willow Bird' saga to know most of them which included:
Shape Changing, Healing, Fire Speaking, ...
Teddy and Mike will fulfill their Mahyee-na pledges to help bring those who
share their spirit (gay but in denial) back into the Light where they can
find fulfillment of self with a lover. Running Water, Simon, Hand-won't-grip
and Jake were by M&J. This final series will account others they will help.
Yup. Lots of 'free' love given by Mike and Teddy to needing gay men and boys.
They'll set up a northern Montana branch of MAITS (Montana American Indian
Two-Spirits), a gay organization for Blackfoot, Chippewa and Cree.
The couple decide that since they're already 'married' in their hearts, no
public ceremony is required. Shaman He-who-runs-up-mountains has other plans.
He throws a surprise party for Mike and Teddy with close family and friends
in attendance to witness their pledging of love for each other. It is a very
happy moment for this couple though bitter sweet for Mike since he'd been
only days away from 'marrying' Jesse before he'd 'died'.
Hawk Flying Over comes to terms that he loves the boy Simon with Mike's help
and consent is given for them to finally express it by Goes-late-in-the-night
and Mike acting as monedo for this youth.
Jake's many email correspondence and telephone conversations with Karl have
finally convinced this man to separate from his wife, freeing him to be gay.
He comes up to Havre for a visit with Jake. They make love in a motel room
since Winna cannot know this is happening to her nephew she has Guardianship
over. Mike and Teddy do what they can to help Jake and Karl get together.
Susan herself proposes to One-white-horse and they are engaged but before
this White woman will marry her man 'a throw back to older Indian times',
she has a few conditions that must be met: electricity hooked up to his cabin,
an indoor bathroom addition constructed and a fenced area erected in back to
keep out grandfather's horses from trotting on the garden she wants to keep
in there. One-white-horse agrees. He gets to work building their love nest.
Winna legally divorces her absent husband and starts dating. Her secretarial
job at the construction company has returned to full time. Mike's helped her
learn MS-Word on their home computer.
I had planned on Mike & Jesse discovering what had happened to Winna's
husband but with Jesse's death... Here's what I had planned on happening
though this information is off-story that won't come to light in the series:
Looks-from-mountain had run away from his wife and son to protect them from
the trouble he'd gotten into from a corrupt subcontractor he helped extort
money from their construction client. It was also a good excuse to run away
from an unhappy marriage (he was always fighting with Winna over money and he
was disappointed that his son Jesse was autistic). Anyway, this man ran away
when he feared that the subcontractor was going to 'silence' him after the
extortion deal went bad with their client who reported them to the police.
During those years on the run, Looks-from-mountain performed odd jobs and
evaded both the police looking for him and the subcontractor's 'hit' on him.
When he needed money, a 'can do' attorney helped him illegally take half the
money out of his house jointly shared with Winna with a deal that benefited
the mortgage company officer (Mr. Flander was given a bribe) to not verify
Winna's necessary signature on the legal documents he helped forged. The
money he 'stole' out of their house was gambled away in Las Vegas and that's
where he met a bad end when the contracted hit on him finally took place. His
'can do' attorney had sold him out to that subcontractor by providing them
the man's assumed name and address in Las Vegas. M&J were going to visit this
attorney (he was listed on Winna's 2nd mortgage papers) and through Gleaning,
learn where Jesse's father was hiding out in Las Vegas and find his grave.
They return home with his ashes and give Winna some closure as well. Pretty
sad, huh? This story sub-plot will never come to light yet I want Readers to
know what I'd been planning concerning what had happened to Jesse's father.
Mike's attorney in Indianapolis gets the Learning Tree Company to honor their
Royalty contracts with him. A belated $28,434 payment covering sales in the
first half of 2003 is paid along with a $5,000 late penalty. They're assured
(by a newly signed legal Agreement) that Mike won't take legal action to get
further payment from them for utilizing his voice recognition module used in
future software products. Dianne tells Mike by phone that sales are doing
very well in those big retail outlets so he should expect a fortune in
January 2004 when receiving Royalties from the previous six months of sales.
Elder Rides-a-fiery-horse and his accounting assistant, Binds-his-post are
confronted by the Blackfoot Council for embezzling money from their tribe.
Mike had provided Legal Elder Quiet-before-the-dawn with the 'tip' that
those two man had been doing this shameful thing for years. The Elder quietly
employed an outside accounting firm to examine his tribe's financial records
and discrepancies were uncovered. Faced with evidence of their crime, Elder
Rides-a-fiery-horse and Binds-his-post must return the monies they stole or
face prosecution. The Elder is struck from the council and his assistant is
also out of a job.
Mike is tempted to buy a new pickup truck but honors Jesse's (seemingly)
long-ago advice not to flash his money around. He buys Winna a new truck
since hers is often requiring service. Mike helps people in the poorer areas
of the reservation by personally helping them fix up their trailers, shacks,
and vehicles with construction materials and repairs he pays for or by his
own hand with hammer, nail and saw. He makes many friends amongst the People.
A Lesbian woman makes a request of Mike for his sperm so she and her partner
can have a child. He performs this duty while Teddy fucks him on top to keep
his cock hard inside her. She didn't want to get pregnant 'artificially' so
Mike's 'love energy' would pass into her child from him. This had been
Foreseen by Jesse.
One winter day in the moon When All The Rivers Freeze, grandfather asks Jake
to accompany him in a walk to a sacred place in the reservation. This shaman
of old tells the boy stories of their People through the afternoon until the
stars come out. Jake drums while the old man sings his Death Song and when
the boy awakens the next morning, he finds that his beloved grandfather has
Flown to the Above but he's not sad. In a dream that night, he'd Seen that
man's joyous Flight. This boy turned man was also given his Indian name:
Jake Finds Himself.
I'll tie up any other loose ends coming from the previous four series.
I hope that my flying fingers won't wear themselves down to the bone or be
kept from finishing this penology. This text contains the story ideas I'm
planning to write. May our Father permit me to do so! I hope that you, my
Reader, are inspired to fulfill your own wishes and desires if they come
from the goodness of your heart. - Vince Water -
DEDICATION:
My use of thoughts Sent between Mike and Jesse, their being life bonded that
was an expression of utter love for each other and so much more had been
taken from reading Mercedes Lackey, author of the trilogy: "Magic's Pawn",
"Magic's Promise" and "Magic's Price". This bittersweet story of gay love
was found between Vanyel with 'Lendel, lost, then reborn again in Stef. So it
will be for Short Hair with Jes-ee-ah, lost, then reborn again as Teddy in
a circle that began with the lovers, Owopspec and Christopher. So it was for
Willow Bird and his lover Smiles A Lot, lost, then reborn as Running Wolf
(nextself) with that Shew-owa scout. True love remains even when the outer
form changes. I humbly dedicate this text (my path towards the future) to
Mercedes Lackey. Thank you! for the gift of self through your wonderful
trilogy. May our stories fill Readers' hearts and bring them hope.
Copyright 2004-2006 by Vince Water Now you know what I'm planning to write!
End of file: IFIDIE!.TXT I'll post updates from time to time.