Lifes Illusions

By Allan Brettell

Published on Dec 26, 2015

Gay

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Life's Illusions - 10 years on - My heartfelt thanks.

On November 14th 2015 my wonderful partner of 37 years Clive, lost his fight for life.

We'd had only 3 weeks since he was diagnosed with cancer, I was not yet at the stage where I accepted the seriousness of the situation, and he was gone.

At the time I was broken, there's no other description for how I felt.

Today it's December 26th 2015, six weeks since that day.

The funeral was on November 25th 2015 at Lytham Gardens in Lancashire UK.

On reflection, I shouldn't have been surprised at the vast number of family and friends who attended, he touched so many lives in a good way over the years.

Last week I brought his ashes home and that helped me, he's home, I can talk to him and laugh when I imagine his answers.

I know there will be a lot of, 'firsts', events we shared for the past 37 years, events I now face alone, yesterday was one of those, my first Christmas Day without him.

I make no claims to have coped well, I didn't, I was a mess from morning till night, the blinds stayed closed, I didn't answer calls, I didn't speak to anyone.

Today I feel I can cope again, I've accepted an invitation to join friends and their family for afternoon tea, I feel as though I've cleared the first hurdle.

To all of you who sent me messages, I send back my heartfelt thanks.

Kind regards and love Allan

Next: Chapter 35: Lifes Illusions II 16


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